Part IV: Finding that Old Feeling Again

6 DAYS BEFORE VALENTINES

Alex stared at herself in her bathroom mirror for who knows how long. She was thinking of talking to Marissa. Her main problem was, she didn't know how to. For one, she was mean to the girl for the past weeks. Second, she was really getting nervous about the thought, unsure if it's the right thing to do. To Alex, Marissa had moved on. She didn't want to make things more complicated than they already are.

Alex closed her eyes and sighed. She felt a sudden rush of cold touch her skin as the water flowed freely from the faucet. She took a deep breath, and then bent down to wash her face. She looked onto her reflection on the mirror as she wiped the droplets of water on her face. Her blue eyes seemingly lacking the spark, the shine: The happiness reflected by her heart.

"I need to see her... Talk to her…"

Alex rested her hands on the sink, breathing heavily. Her attention was drawn to the dangling object in her towel rack: Her heart. She wondered to herself if she wanted a second chance with Marissa. She wondered if she wants to get hurt again. She raised one of her hands and rubbed the back of her neck. She stared at herself, sighing once more. Just then, she felt her heart skip a beat: Once… Twice… Now there it was Thrice. What's happening to me? Alex asked herself, looking at her reflection.

"Do you know how much she hurt you? She used you Alex. She used YOU!"

Alex searched for something in her eyes. But she couldn't find it: That familiar look of anger, and resentment in her eyes. She felt her heart skip a beat again.

"This is wrong… This is crazy…"

Alex laughed at herself. You're such a doormat Alex Kelly.

"The things you make me do Marissa Cooper… The things you make me do…"

Alex smiled, closing her faucet and heading out to her bedroom.

----

Eli took out three bowls from the dishwasher and put it on the dining table. Jessie and Katie were having fun walks in the morning, and were enjoying watching him play in the club at night. Taking a milk carton from the fridge, Eli prepared breakfast for them.

"Jessie! Katie! Wake up!" He yelled out but received no answer.

He slowly took steps towards the girls' bedroom and slowly opened the door. He found the girls' sleeping in each others arms. He thought for a second. Should I wake them up? Should I take a picture? Jessie will kill me. He grinned just watching the two young girls sleep peacefully. What did Jessie see in Katie? He asked himself but he shook his head right away. Damn Eli, the girl is hot. No wonder your little sister fancies her. He tilted his head admiring the movements his little sister is making while asleep.

Katie's arms were draped leisurely around Jessie's waist. The blonde had he arms around the brunette's neck. Katie's lips touched Jessie's forehead, while Jessie's lips touched the crook of Katie's neck To Eli's eyes, Jessie was pulling Katie closer. If Katie moves backward, Jessie pulls her.

Eli smiled, turning around to close the door. He decided not to wake up the two girls while protectively holding each other. From the other side, he knocked loudly and began to yell.

"JESSIE! KATIE! BREAKFAST!"

It was so loud Jessie immediately sat up, looking around the room in fear. Katie was still sleeping soundly in bed, much to Jessie's annoyance. She shook the other girl's body to wake her up. Katie stirred and looked at her confused.

"What?" Katie mumbled pulling a pillow to cover her face.

"Breakfast…" Jessie replied falling into bed again.

"Not hungry…" Katie grumbled underneath the pillow, but Jessie took it away from her face.

"We have to. Now get up." Jessie leaned in to give her a kiss on the lips.

"Morning breath…" Katie replied with her brain begging her to fall back to sleep.

"Don't care." Jessie said back, kissing her deeply.

Katie didn't have to think twice. She kissed Jessie back, sucking her bottom lip gently. Soon their tongues met, exploring each other mouths slowly, Jessie's hands traveled up Katie's shirt, revealing only the skin underneath.

"Careful Ms. Sammler. Or you'll spoil the surprises." Katie pulled back giving her a grin.

"Fine! Get up, before I change my mind about Valentines!" Jessie shot back, rolling off to bed.

"Oh come on… Just because I have better self control doesn't mean you have to put your frustration on me." Katie sat up scratching her head.

Jessie turned to her and arched one of her brows.

"Breakfast it is!" Katie raised her hand, trying to divert their conversation.

"Nice try. No kisses for you till Valentines…" Jessie marched towards the door and got out of the room.

"JESS! I WAS JUST KIDDING!" Katie hurriedly followed in fear of the loss of her kissing privileges.

----

"Coop… You want to go to the club tonight?" Summer asked sitting beside her friend.

Marissa didn't answer. The taller brunette just stared out the window, wondering the things that could have been, might have been if she only realized Alex had fallen for her. She thought of how bad she was to the girl. Dumping her like a hot potato when she was through. Letting her go and moving on like Alex didn't touch her life. Feeling regret for all the things she had done to hurt the blonde. I deserve this. I deserve this hurt I'm feeling.

"Coop… You have to snap out of it…" Summer rubbed her friend's back, trying really hard to soothe her.

But she was not successful.

She loved me. I hurt her. And she still loves me. I don't deserve her love. Marissa said to herself. Tears starting to fall again.

"Coop… Stop this… I'm taking you home." Summer stood up, angrily walking to get her phone.

She didn't want Marissa this way. She couldn't wait for Alex to make her move. Marissa wasn't improving. Her friend was sinking deeper into depression.

"No." Marissa replied, taking Summer's hand.

Summer turned to her, and found her green eyes in tears.

"I'm going to wait Summer. I have to wait. My heart can take this. I deserve this."

"You're torturing yourself!" Summer said trying to contain herself from crying.

"I can take this Summer. I'll wait even until forever for Alex."

I don't think your heart can take forever, Coop." Summer replied.

They both sighed, knowing the only move left in this real life drama is a move only Alex can make.

----

"What's up with you? You've been looking all over the club like a hawk… Looking for someone in particular?" Jodie asked watching Alex scan the room.

"Nothing. Just… Looking." Alex turned to her smiling.

"Right…"

Alex scanned the room again. Where is she? She asked herself. She searched for the tall, green eyed brunette that her heart calls out to. Just then she saw her approaching. But wait, she was holding someone's hand. She smiled, although disappointed.

Jessie and Katie, smiles etched on their faces.

"Hi!" Jessie and Katie greeted, their hands still entwined.

"Looks like you two fix problems real fast." Alex smiled hoping the two young girls did solve their differences.

"What?" Katie asked confused but received an elbow from Jessie.

"Nothing talking can't fix." Jessie smiled turning to Katie with an ACT-NORMAL look.

"Right." Katie replied rubbing her tummy.

Jessie dragged her towards the booth were Eli was resting, Alex just smiled at them.

"Nothing talking can't fix…" Jodie repeated the phrase, obviously trying to get into Alex's nerves.

"Right." Alex replied sarcastically.

But in her brain, the phrase stuck. Maybe she should talk to Marissa. Start talking about what's new and not what was the past. But then, "Katie's" questions lingered. What if Marissa declares she loves Alex? Is Alex prepared for that? Would she believe such, coming from Marissa?

"Jodie, can you cover for me tomorrow?"

"Why? Got a date that early?"

"No. I'm just going to meet a friend?"

"Ok…"

So there it was decided, Alex was going to talk to Marissa the next day. Alex didn't care about what might transpire with their talk. She just had to talk to Marissa again. And then there it was. Her heart skipped at beat again. She smiled. How may times do I have to fall in love with Marissa Cooper?

She shook her head, dragging Jodie to the dance floor to enjoy the rest of the night. Tomorrow was certainly going to be a big day.