Title: Unbreakable
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own the Harry Potter world or its characters. J. K. Rowling does.
Summary: If you're going to make an Unbreakable Vow, it's advisable to keep a clear head. Implied slash SBRL. Time HBP, just before Dumbledore's funeral.
"So, finally, you want to talk to me?" Tonks said.
"Please," Remus said, "just tell me. Why are you doing this to me? All that in there – over Bill's hospital bed – that's only the latest. You've been making my life hell for months. Why?"
Tonks looked down at her hands, twisting her fingers together. "I have to," she said quietly. "I promised. And I don't want to die."
"What? You're not going to die. Although come to think of it, you do look a bit peaky. Are you all right?"
"No, I'm bloody well not all right, and it's your fault. I made an Unbreakable Vow, and you're not letting me keep it, and it's destroying me. I can't stand much more of it."
"An Unbreakable? But you know better than that, Tonks – to whom did you make this vow?"
"Molly."
"Molly?"
"She was the only other person around at the time."
"But why……"
"We were both a bit drunk, and it seemed like a good idea."
"You and Molly got drunk together?" Remus tried unsuccessfully to get his head around this bizarre image.
"No, no, Molly wasn't drunk, it was Sirius."
"You and Sirius got drunk together."
"Only the once. January last year. Sirius was feeling low because Harry had gone back to Hogwarts, and you were away. And I was miserable because I'd just had a terrible job to do. I had to visit a witch in St. Mungo's whose house had been attacked and destroyed by Death Eaters, and to tell her her husband and both her children had been killed. That's the worst thing we ever have to do, as you know. So when Sirius offered me a share of his Firewhisky bottle, I took it. We both had a few glasses, and he fetched another bottle, and started rambling on about how he'd always liked me even though I was family, and I was one of the few people he could trust, and then he said 'Promise me that if anything happens to me you'll look after my Moony'. I thought he meant the hippogriff, so I said 'Yes, of course I will, I'll take him back to the Forest, he can go free there'. But he said 'No, he mustn't be in the Forest without me'. So I said 'All right then, I'll take him to Hagrid'. He said 'Hagrid? I don't think so. Hagrid can take care of Harry. I'm not so worried about Harry, he'll have Molly and Arthur looking out for him, as well as Hagrid and Dumbledore and the kids. But my poor Moony's got no-one, he'll be so sad and lonely with no-one to love him. You'll love him, won't you Tonks?' So I said 'Yes, okay, but I never knew hippogriffs were that sensitive'. He said 'Hippogriffs? What are you talking about? You're drunk'. I said 'You're a fine one to talk, you're more drunk than I am' – which was true – but he said 'Never mind that. I need you to make an Unbreakable Vow, but you can't make it to me because it'll only come into effect if I die, so it has to be someone else'. Well, Molly was the only other person in the house, and it wasn't until he was explaining it all to her that I realised Moony was you, not the hippogriff."
"And it didn't occur to you then that this Unbreakable Vow might not be such a good idea?"
"To be honest, I didn't think I'd ever have to keep it. You and I were both out risking our lives every other day, while Sirius was sitting safe in his unplottable house. Who would have thought he'd be the first of us to die? I expected him to outlive us both."
"All right. Don't cry, Tonks, keep calm and tell me exactly the words of this vow."
"I don't remember."
"You can repeat verbatim a mad drunken conversation with Sirius, but you can't remember the precise wording of a vow you have sworn on your life to keep?"
"That's about it. But – wait a minute - Molly was sober. She'll remember!"
"Yes, of course I remember," said Molly. "Tonks made the vow to me, and Sirius was the Bonder."
"And – this is very important – can you remember the precise words used?" Remus asked.
"Certainly," said Molly. "This is what he told me to ask her. 'If Sirius Black dies, or is sent back to Azkaban, will you, Nymphadora Tonks, befriend Remus Lupin, care for him, comfort him, and do everything in your power to make him happy?' and she replied 'I will'."
"That's it?" Remus asked. "Nothing about stalking him, embarrassing him, making his life a misery?"
"There's no need to be sarcastic," Molly snapped. "This is serious, you see the state poor Tonks is in."
"Yes, sorry," said Remus. "It's all right, Tonks, you're not going to die, because you're going to keep your vow. Just stop pursuing me, and that'll make me happy. And we've always been friends and cared for each other, haven't we?"
"Yes, I thought so," said Tonks hesitantly. "But you've been avoiding me this past year……"
"That was because …… well, never mind. I won't any more. We'll be friends again."
"And I don't have to – to – marry you, or – or – or anything like that?"
"Absolutely not anything like that. The Vow doesn't commit you to 'anything like that', does it? Does it, Molly?"
"No," said Molly, rather reluctantly. "But it would have been nice, wouldn't it? You'd be well suited, you like each other……"
"Liking each other is one thing, marrying is something else. I think Tonks can do better than a middle-aged gay werewolf. Anyway, Molly, you still have several unattached sons to dispose of, have you not?"
"Well, if you're going to be flippant about it, I'll leave you to sort yourselves out," Molly said, flouncing off.
Tonks laughed. "That'll teach me not to make an Unbreakable without getting it in writing," she said. "I feel a lot better already. But I promised to comfort you and I can't really, can I?"
"Yes you can. Help me get through Dumbledore's funeral, and we'll call it quits on that one."
"Of course I will. I'll miss him too." Tonks frowned in concentration, and suddenly her hair turned bright orange. "Oops, wrong colour," she said. "But I'm getting there."