Beloved: Did you hear? Kate Mulgrew is s'posed to be here in OUR state in FEBRUARY!!!!! *squeaks*
Sunrise: *takes out foghorn and toots in Beloved's ear*
Beloved: AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! What the hell was that for?!?!?!?!?!
Sunrise: *glaring daggers at Beloved* You squeaked.
Beloved: *eyeing Sunrise warily* Sorry. I'll try not to do it again.
Sunrise: Good. *rolls eyes, knowing full well that Beloved will do it again*
Beloved: All right. On with the story. I still say we should put a comment about Ian's sexy ass in this chapter.
Sunrise: What IS it with you and butts?! *muttering* Especially Ian's.
Beloved: *attempting to sound innocent* Um, nothing.
Sunrise: *sarcastically* Yeah, sure. Right.
Beloved: Oh, shut up. *hits Sunrise with pillow and falls off bed when Sunrise yanks it out of her hands and hits her back with it HARD*
Sunrise: *growls menacingly* Excuse me?
Beloved: Umm, never mind.
Sunrise: That's better. Now, I'm tired, and I'm going to bed.
Beloved: *latches onto Sunrise's pant leg* Nooooooo, you CAN'T go!!!!! We're finishing chapter eight TONIGHT!!!!!
Sunrise: *crossing arms and shaking leg to rid it of Beloved* Get off me, you crazy lunatic!! *starts reprimanding Beloved in Spanish*
Beloved: *looking bewildered* In English, please. I've told you three times tonight not to switch languages on me. *smirks and gestures wildly, communicating a rude epithet in American Sign Language*
Sunrise: ALL RIGHT!!!!! STOP ALREADY!!!!! I don't even wanna know what you're saying—I already know it's something really bad by the look on your face.
Beloved: *grins evilly* Oh, it was something bad all right…
Sunrise: Yeah, I figured that. *mutters something in Spanish* Wipe that look off your face.
Beloved: *grin drops from face faster than if it fell off Niagara Falls*
Sunrise: That's better. Now, let's—
Beloved: NO! Not goin' to bed! We write now!
Sunrise: Hey, cavewoman, I'm tired and I'm going to bed. Now.
Beloved: *grumbling* Fine. *turns nose up at Sunrise, who ignores her completely and goes to bed*
Sunrise: 'Night.
Beloved: *quiet as her face lights up with an idea and an evil smile* 'Night.
…TEN MINUTES LATER…
*Beloved races across room and dive-bombs onto lump under bedcovers. Sunrise opens one eye, rolls over, and goes back to sleep.*
Beloved: *from under Sunrise* GET OFF ME!!!!!
Sunrise: I thought I felt something under there…*laughs maniacally*
Beloved: *continues making unintelligible noises and rude signs at Sunrise*
Sunrise: *innocently* Oh, do you want out from under there?
Beloved: *muffled* Yes.
Sunrise: Oh. *moves achingly slow and rolls off of Beloved, going back to sleep. Snores loudly*
Beloved: *gives Sunrise a dirty look*
Sunrise: I saw that.
Beloved: *looks shocked* But—but—but you were asleep!
Sunrise: Really? Was I? I don't recall sleeping. I recall a dive-bomber, a human pancake, and a dirty look.
Beloved: *shoots Sunrise another dirty look*
Sunrise: I saw that, too. If you'd like to wake up ALIVE tomorrow morning, I'd suggest you LEAVE ME ALONE.
Beloved: *starts to think*
Sunrise: No.
Beloved: But I didn't ask you anything.
Sunrise: You were about to.
Beloved: *stutters unintelligibly* Bedtime, then?
Sunrise: *muttering* Finally she gets the point.
Beloved: Hey, I heard that!
Sunrise: Oh, really. NOW LET ME SLEEP!!!!!
Beloved: *in small voice* Okay.
…NEXT MORNING…
Beloved: WAAAAAAAAKE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!! *attempts to pull blanket from around Sunrise*
Sunrise: *yanks blanket back, taking Beloved with it. Beloved is plastered against Sunrise's turned back*
Beloved: *peels herself off of Sunrise's back* Oh, come on! Hello? HELLOOOO?!?! Hel—
Sunrise: You'd better not even finish that sentence.
Beloved: This the last time I stay at your house.
Sunrise: Yeah, right. You'll be back next weekend. And the next. And the one after that.
Beloved: *crosses arms and grumps* Humph. *squeaks*
Sunrise: BELOVED!!!!!
Note: Both of us are twelve cans short of a six-pack. We're also a little loco. Actually, we're muy loco. Very crazy.
THINGS GONE AWRY IN THE UNIVERSE—PAST, PRESENT, AND FUTURE CHAPTER 8 – CHANGE OF UNIFORMSoon after the two women had stupefied their husbands with the wonderful news of their impending fatherhood, Kathryn brought to Chakotay and Tuvok's attention something that had been niggling at her since before the Nottinghams had made their appearance on the ship.
"Gentlemen, I've been thinking about making some changes around the ship."
"What kind of changes, Captain?" Chakotay asked, all business.
"Well, I've been thinking of allowing a more relaxed uniform policy."
Tuvok's eyebrow rose slightly, both indicating his curiosity and bidding her continue.
"I feel that to truly achieve a family-like atmosphere, we should permit the wearing of appropriate civvies, with a modified combadge to show department and rank."
"What modifications do you suggest, Captain?"
Kathryn stood and moved to the wall workstation, touching several panels until a small holographic object shimmered into view a foot above the conference table.
It was a combadge. Across the bottom, below the gold-turned-burgundy ring, were four golden pips.
"You see, this is what mine would look like. Pips across the bottom, the ring the color of the department I belong to—red for command—and they can wear whatever they want—within reason, of course—and everyone is far more comfortable. Especially when they have certain…conditions, like myself."
Both men nodded solemnly.
"Seems like a pretty sound idea to me," her husband said.
"Indeed, and it may well be the boost to crew moral Mr. Neelix has been so kindly reminding us that we need."
Kathryn struggled to keep a straight face as she observed the look of mingled annoyance and consternation the Vulcan allowed to flit across his usually neutral features for an instant. After a moment, the security officer said, "Was there anything else, Captain?"
"Yes." She folded her hands neatly, resting them on the table before her. Then, leaning back in her seat, she continued, "I'm going to give the field rank of Lieutenant to both Sara Pezzini-Nottingham and Ian Nottingham. They'll be placed in Security, if you're all right with it, Tuvok."
"I am…'all right' with this arrangement, Captain. I have observed their skills in combat, and I have seen within them the loyalty they have, both for each other, and for Voyager, her Captain, and her crew."
Kathryn smiled softly. "Thank you, Tuvok. Your approval means a lot to me." She turned to the man she loved. "Chakotay? What about you? I need to know your feelings on this, too."
He contemplated her for a moment, then nodded slowly. "I agree whole-heartedly."
"Thank you." She leaned over and pressed a light kiss to his tattooed temple. "Dismissed."
********
"Captain Janeway to the crew of Voyager. I have several announcements I'd like to make. First, the Commander and I are expecting twins, a boy and girl, in six months. Also, the senior staff would like to congratulate the Nottinghams on their twins, a girl and a boy, due at the same time. Third, I have decided, with the aid of Commander Chakotay and Commander Tuvok, that the uniform code is to be relaxed somewhat. You will all be allowed to wear appropriate casual civvies with a new type of combadge. You'll receive the information on replication your new combadge at your workstations. Last, the senior staff is proud to announce—no, Mister Paris, your wife is not pregnant with twins—that Lt. Sara Pezzini Nottingham and Lt. Ian Nottingham have officially joined the crew. Please offer them every courtesy you would any other crew member. Thank you. Janeway out." At her final words, cheers broke out all over the ship.
********
"Sara Magdalene Pezzini-Nottingham, I now officially promote you to the field rank of Lieutenant."
Kathryn pinned the two golden pips onto Sara's new communicator, just below the yellow ring.
"Ian Christian Nottingham, I now officially promote you to the field rank of Lieutenant."
Kathryn pinned his pair of gold pips just below the yellow ring on his own freshly-replicated communicator.
She stepped back. "Welcome to the crew of Voyager."
The crew that surrounded them on all sides broke into applause.
Beaming, Kathryn moved forward and embraced her friends one at a time. "Congratulations to both of you."
********
AN: Sorry about that psycho addition up there. We have a tendency to get like that at four—make that five—AM. Our utmost apologies for exposing innocent readers to our horrible sense of humor.