The Eradication of Little Duo
"Make a wish!" cried Trowa as he shoved his face violently into the cake. Now he was covered with icing and couldn't breathe, but that's how it goes when you're a gundamn pio-let. It was Quatre's birthday bash and he began to cry now that Trowa had justshed half of his glorious bang into the cake. But they all made wishes. Heero really wished he could a drive a Zamboni machine. Duo wished he could be Heero's baby…forever and ever. We don't care about what the other people wished.
But little did they know! That a shaman in the Orient burped at the same time of said wish. And they came true.
The next morning, Heero awoke to find himself in the garage of the local skating rink. He was upon such a magnificent steed-machine he cried. He had finally become a bona fide Zamboni driver. And that is where our story has begun a little bit.
Heero had cleaned the ice nearly five times, when suddenly, a little voice sounded out. "Cockadoodledoo!" said a tiny whisper.
"WHOSAIDTHAT?" Heero said. He was suspish. He looked around from left to right, and then maybe up. But nothing prepared him for the magical surprise that awaited him when he looked down. There appeared to be nothing at first. But then he realized…he was pregnant. "Gee whiz!"
"Fuck you, I didn't want that kind of reception!" cried the voice again.
"Are you my baby?" said Heero as if he were an elephant. He was trying to do impressions every now and then to practice going undercover at the circus…or perhaps… in the wild.
"Fuck yea bitch."
"Omg! Duo!" yelped Heero. "How DARE you become my baby!"
"I didn't want to be a fetus!" said Duo. Duo kinda looked like Duo, with the head and the braid and everything, except his body was a curled up honest to God fetus. Which was now steadily growing at 5 mph. Okay.
"Damn. I didn't want to be a teen mom. I wanted to get a real job and go to college. Like Walmart Smith. But now….I'm going to have to give birth and take care of you, just like my best friend Wufei….I gave him a pizza."
"No, Heero," said Duo the Fetus. "I have wished to be your baby forever. You will now have to carry me in your womb for the next eternity. And don't fight it, I read the prophecy, Mommy."
"You're disturbing," countered Heero. "I might believe you after I eat from Clam Chowder."
He ate some Chunky Chowder. For two, this time. Because, as you recall, Duo's a shrunken fetus living within Heero's womb for the next thousand years. At least.
Too bad for you their sex lives will be strange from now on. Although Heero now masturbates not alone.
You shoulda been at their wedding. There was Heero and the ultrasound machine. And a monitor, so everybody could watch Duo say the vows and make a peace sign for the cameras with his underdeveloped fingers. He was sorta naked too, but his cock was pretty non-existent so nobody complained, except for Heero. He likes balls.
Duo's hadn't dropped yet. He was a fetus. In case you don't remember.
BALLS ARE NOT FOR GROWLING BABIES.
The end of the story is thus: Duo, fetus, and Heero, ex-Zamboni convict, avidly support abortion!