Title: Hope for Tomorrow
Author: Crimson Eyed Dragon
Rating: R
Pairing: Seto X Yami
Warnings: language (Yami has a dirty mouth), sexual content, violence, and yaoi.LEMON AHEAD
Disclaimer: Yugioh does not belong to me. Lonely No More by Rob Thomas does not belong to me.
Summary: Yami is an 18 year old that has lived on the streets most of his life taking care of his brother, Yugi. Seto is a rookie cop that soon finds himself drawn into Yami's world
I would like to dedicate this chapter to my wifey, Desidera and my GSB (lol so much fun) – Rekall and Pysche who constantly badger me to write this story, demand early previews of each chapter, and all but threatened me to write this one chapter more than the others (damn hentais). If it weren't for you three I think I would have pulled my hair out by now. But your continued praise of this story was all the fuel I needed to get it done. So again I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Dragon: I got a few reviews saying that they thought this was going to be a uke Seto lemon. :shakes head: As the pairing above indicates, Yami is the uke, not Seto. If you have been following Yami's emotions in the last chapter and this one especially, you will see why he is the uke even if his personality screams seme. Now that the issue is addressed, I will let you continue on and get to the part I know all of you have been waiting on…
Chapter 11
Clenched fists grabbed a hold of soft black sheets as white-hot pain shot through his body as he moved to sit up. Heavy breathing filled the silent atmosphere of the room as crimson eyes opened to look at his current goal in front of him. If he could just make it to that door, it would allow him to see the rest of the house and look for a bathroom.
Yami groaned as sweat began to form on his brow. He had hoped that the pain pills he had taken thirty minutes ago would have had an affect by now, and they possibly would have if he hadn't decided that today would be the day he would get up and move about.
But he was tired of lying in the bed all the time. He wanted to move and see what his back looked like. Every time someone else saw it they would look at him with pity in their eyes and it was driving him nuts. Pity was not something he could handle being thrown his way. And if he was going to be pitied then he wanted to know why.
Crimson eyes swung over to the bedside table and rested on the small wooden box. It had amazed him that not one time since he had come here a week ago did he feel the need to hide it. He was totally relaxed with it sitting out in the open even when he knew that Seto was sneaking in his room at night. He smirked. For a cop, Seto's observant skills were slacking. If the rookie had paid better attention he would have realized that he hadn't been taking his pain pills at night like he was supposed too.
Since his mind and body were clean of any drugs, he had reverted back to his normal sleeping mode of waking up at the drop of a pin. So every night when the door would open, he would make sure to control his breathing, pretend to be asleep and he would let the rookie gather him up gently in his arms.
Inwardly he relished in the feeling of being held, the comforting natural way their bodies seemed to fit so perfectly together. If only he could allow himself to 'wake' up and look into those enticing sapphire colored eyes. But he just couldn't. He was too afraid that he would get caught up in the emotions he knew he would see there.
He had come to terms over the past week that Seto loved him. So now all he had to do was keep the other at bay until his back was healed enough for him to leave.
But from the way it felt right now, that was going to be a while.
Yami groaned as he looked away from the box back to the open door. Ten feet to the exit, and who knew how many feet to his next goal. He could make that right?
Gritting his teeth, he pushed himself up on to his unsteady legs. Weeks of not moving taking an effect on his weakened muscles. Back hunched over to order to lessen the pain, Yami reached out a hand towards the table beside the bed and placed his hand on it to help support his weight. He paused there, taken in as much oxygen as his body demanded in its efforts to do something it wasn't ready to do. Crimson eyes narrowed and focused on the door ahead of him, determined to make it to his goal.
Taking one last deep breath, Yami willed his damaged body to move step by agonizing step. A small almost smug smile graced his face as he leaned against the doorframe. He willed his mind to ignore the pain as he looked out into the hallway and was thankful when he noticed the open door leading to the bathroom almost directly across from him.
Swallowing a lump in his throat, Yami forced his body to move once more, into the hallway. One arm stretched out in front of him, reaching for the wall as his other one lingered at the fingertips on the doorframe he had just left. Shaky, uncertain footsteps sounded throughout the empty space, as he made his way slowly to the door. Yami breathed out a sigh of relief when his hand touched the smooth sheetrock.
Once again leaning on the doorframe, his tanned hand felt along the wall searching for the light switch. Finding it, he flipped it up and let his eyes adjust to the bright white light that reflected off of the mirror. His last goal set in his mind; Yami painfully made his way over to the sink, both hands resting on the cool beige counter top.
Crimson eyes lingered on his reflection staring back at him. His normally deep, rich tan was pale and ashen looking. A body once toned with street built muscles was now thin and weak. He lifted a hand from its resting place and settled it against his bandaged chest, fingering the gauze lightly. It would have to come off; he needed to see just what had been done to him.
Gently as he could, he set out to remove the fabric that contained his body, slowly exposing multitudes of small white scars that littered his torso. Each one had a story, each one had left its mark on him, a vivid reminder of all the evil had had done just to keep his brother alive and unharmed. But as the last of the bandaged was removed, he stood facing the mirror still, unable to turn around and try to see.
This one, the one that people looked at him with pity, the one that had led him here, the one that shown Taro had won, had not been for his brother, not this time.
No, this one had been done for a certain blue-eyed cop. It was for him that Yami was cursed with it.
Taro's informant thought he was leaking information to the rookie and Taro believed him. Yami could have easily told him the truth of the matter; that Seto was there to talk to him because he wanted to become closer to the crimson-eyed teen. But if he were to have saved himself by confessing the truth, Taro would have wasted no time coming after the cop.
In Taro's eyes, Seto would have seen too close for comfort. A threat that would have to have been eliminated immediately.
Fortunately for Seto, Yami did not fear death. He would have died protecting Yugi, Bakura and yes even at time he would have for Seto too.
Closing his eyes, he turned his body as much as he could. Gods, he couldn't believe he was this scared to look at what had been done. Why the hell did this one injury affect him so? A cold shiver ran down his body. He knew the answer to that as well as he knew the reasons behind it.
Fear, the one thing that he hardly felt for himself, was the one thing that was controlling him now. Fear that he would be rejected by the few he allowed in his life. Fear that his brother would know the truth and knowing that Yami was the one that cause all the sadness in his life. Fear that Bakura would regret all he had done for him and take it out on his brother. Fear that Seto would be disgusted by him and turn his back on him.
Fear.
Four simple letters combined to make one of the strongest emotions that would even make the toughest men around crumble to the ground.
Yami's heart began to sped up again, thumping wildly against his chest, ringing loudly in his ears. Lungs expanded and deflated over and over again; unable to keep up with the demand his heart was putting on them. Fear; it gripped him tightly, squeezing him till he was drowning in it.
He couldn't look.
Just a simple act of opening his eyes and he just couldn't do it.
He hung his head, eyes still closed. Taro had won whether the bastard knew it or not, he had won. Turning back around, Yami blindly reached out for the light switch and flipped it off when he found it.
Empty crimson eyes opened to look into the thing he had named him self after. Darkness, it sounded him, protected him from the one thing he had come to fear….him self. His own mind, his own heart fueled the emotion stronger than a knife, gun or Death him self could.
Body numb, his heart still pounding louder and louder in his ears, he felt around for the small portable radio he had seen when he had entered. It was too quiet for his liking; he needed something to take his mind off of his current thoughts. Slowly his fingers worked over the metal object, flipping various switches or pressing buttons until the soft music of some pop station filled the room. He barely took notice of the announcer telling the artist of the next upcoming song as he carefully fumbled his way through the dark to the shower.
Movements were robotic as he stripped out of the silk pajama bottoms he had been wearing. Silently, he slid the glass shower door open and stepped inside, wanting nothing more than to feel the hot scalding water beat harshly onto his skin. Feeling along the shower wall, he found the knobs and turned them, not caring if the cold or hot came out first. It wasn't as if he could do anymore damage to his body, and even if he did, it wouldn't have mattered to him anyways.
Yami let out a quiet hiss as the harsh spray of water beat down on to his mangled back. The feeling of fresh pain bringing him momentarily back to the present time.
Pain. Fear. Damnation.
It was all there, all inside him, just waiting to take over him. Everything was just too much, too close to the surface for him to ignore anymore. And for the first time in six years, something happened.
He cried.
Seto opened the front door of his house and stepped inside, wondering why all the lights were off. Pulling his keys out of the lock, he shut the wooden door behind him, locking it back again when he remembered that Mai had a date tonight and most likely wouldn't be back until tomorrow.
Shedding his winter coat, he hung it up in the hallway closet, placing his keys on the small dish on the table. The faint sound of a radio and running water filtered to his ears as he made his way further into the house. Curious, he stepped into the hallway that led to the bedrooms and walked closer to the sound, stopping at Mai's bathroom.
He furrowed his eyebrows, confused, as to why the door was open; lights were off, radio on and the water running. Who the hell was in his house? Yami couldn't get up yet…speaking of Yami, Seto looked over into the guest room to find the bed empty of his little hellcat.
Worry over took curiosity, and he walked into the bathroom, flipping the switch on, flooding the once dark room with light. "Yami?" he asked loud enough to be heard over the mild latin beat that had just started coming from the radio.
Through the glass shower doors, Seto could make out the small petite form of the one he was looking for. How the hell did he make into here? His eyes roamed the room, seeing the pile of bandages on the floor near the sink and the dark purple pajama bottoms near the shower.
"Yami?" he asked again, his shoes clicked on the marble tiled floor as he walked closer to the shower. Not receiving an answer, the rookie slid the door open just wide enough to let him stick his head in.
Seto eyes fell onto the bent over form of Yami, forehead leaning against the shower wall, arms hanging limply by his side. He tried his best not to let his eyes wonder down the naked body in front of him, instead he let his eyes focus on the red, irritated skin that lined the crooked cross that went from Yami's neck to the small of his back.
Now it seems to me
That you know just what to say
But words are only words
Can you show me something else
"Seto."
Blinking, Seto tightened his jaw, trying not to let it fall open in surprise. Had Yami just said his name?
"Yami?" he asked carefully, not wanting to spark that famous temper. "Do you need something?"
"Tell me what you see."
Furrowing his eyebrows, Seto slid the glass door open more to get a better look at him. Just what was he getting at?
He studied the wet body in front of him, taking in the normally proud shoulders that were now slumped as if the weight of the world were on them. "I don't understand."
"I saw myself today," Yami murmured, still leaning against the shower wall, not once looking at the rookie. "I saw what I have truly become. I am marked for death now. All my sins are out in the open for anyone to look at, including you. I now know he had no intentions of killing me, but rather to let me live knowing that I will never be free."
Stunned realization hit Seto as he quickly made a decision. Silently, he removed his uniform, letting it pile up with Yami's clothes and stepped into the shower, pausing for a moment as the spray of water hit his skin.
Carefully, he reached out and placed a hand on stiff shoulders, inwardly sighing in relief when he was not pushed away.
"Yami, baby, listen to me. What you saw is not what I see when I look at you. I don't see your 'sins', I see you, a person that is strong both on the inside and out. Your mind is cunning, intelligent. Your spirit is something that most people would die for. You have over come things that no one else would have been able too. Hell even I'm not sure I would have been able to deal with it.
On the outside, you are beautiful. When I look at you, I don't see this mark," he murmured as he leaned over the lithe figure, lips just centimeters away from the healing flesh. "I see warm, bronzed skin, soft to the touch."
Seto's lips descended, lightly kissing the back of his neck, working his way slowly down the newly forming scar, causing Yami to gasp at the sensation. One hand pressed against the wall above the smaller teen, bracing himself as he took his other hand and gently ran his fingers through the fallen wet tri colored hair.
"Your eyes," he began between kisses. "Are both intoxicating and exotic. When I look at them I find myself drowning in their beauty. They are a reflection of your soul; dark but enticing, alluring, and I crave to have them look at me."
"Those are just words," Yami murmured as Seto's hand left his hair and traveled down his face, slightly calloused fingers tracing the outline of his jaw.
"I speak the truth."
Can you swear to me that you'll always be this way?
Show me how you feel
More than ever baby
"Words are just meaningless."
Still more kisses were raining down his spine, sending tiny shivers of pleasure through his body. A soft almost inaudible moan escaped his lips. Seto was being so gentle, something he had never experienced before. All his johns had been rough, controlling, and he had let them knowing that it was only for the money and never pleasure. Was this what lovers did to each other? Softness in a voice, lingering electricity on their skin from every contact they made with each other? If it was, then this was something he wanted.
"No more words. Show me. Show me how you feel, what you see." Yami sighed as he closed his eyes, right hand moving behind him, searching for the warm body of the cop.
"I'm tired of it all. Lonely. Make me forget, even if it's just for today, just for now."
Well I don't want to be lonely no more
I don't want to have to pay for this
I don't want another lover at my door
It's just another heartache on my list
"I would give you anything you wanted, Yami. Just ask."
"I ask for you to show me what love is. Teach me. I need to know that I am capable of feeling something other than fear, pain, hate."
I don't wanna be angry no more
You're the one who could never stand for this
So when you tell me that you love me, know for sure
I don't wanna be lonely anymore
"Then I will start be showing you just how much I love you."
"No, not those words. You have no idea who I am, what I am. Don't say them unless you know because when you do, you'll want to take them back."
Gently, Seto turned Yami around, wanting to look into those eyes again. Sapphire gazed into confused and scared ruby. "Alright, I won't say them, until you are ready. But no matter what you think, I will never wish to take back anything I have said to you. But for now, I will play it your way." He paused as he ran the pad of his thumb across shower-wet lips. "Now, I believe I need to make up for that kiss in the hospital."
Yami moaned low in his throat when Seto's mouth descended onto his. First gentle and loving until the other's tongue ran lightly over his bottom lip asking permission to explore farther. The tri-colored teen mentally sighed at the feeling of such tenderness, such soft caresses of the hand that lingered over his side, tenderly touching his skin setting it a blaze with each pass of nimble fingers.
Deepening the kiss, Seto relished in the closeness of the smaller body, wanting to feel as much of it as possible. This very moment had played out in his mind from almost the beginning. The dark teen had haunted his thoughts until he had wormed his way into his heart, forever sealing his fate.
Bodies moved impossibly closer, till not even the cascading water could come between them. Yami tensed slightly as he felt Seto's hardened arousal press against his stomach, but relaxed as soothing breaths hovered over his neck, before licking the trailing water that ran down.
Yami's own hands ran up the length of Seto's arms, reaching broad shoulders, till they came to rest behind the other's neck. He was content in letting the taller man set the pace, to do as he wished. He wanted this one time to last forever, to give him something to remember.
Seto moved his mouth from the graceful neck down Yami's firm chest, carefully marking him in his own way to show that Yami was his. A gasp of air reached his ears as he gently took one nipple into his mouth, running his tongue across it, nipping, rolling it around. His other hand worked its way down, lightly running the back of his hand against the sensitive flesh of Yami's stomach, causing it to quiver under the motion, till he reached his target and wrapped his hand around hardened flesh.
Crimson eyes flew open only to slide shut again as Seto's hand slowly began to pump him, adding to the sensation of the mouth that was now slowly working further down his body. Pain was all forgotten now under the lavishing of the rookie. It barely tingled in the back of his mind as all his senses were now on overdrive. His own hands were now grasping chestnut locks, silently urging the other on.
Lust clouded eyes opened and looked down to lock on to equally lust filled sapphire looking back at him. The sight of the proud cop kneeling before him – a thief, murderer, a whore- looking up at him like that was so wrong but yet was one of the most erotic things he had ever seen and he nearing screamed when that moist, hot mouth took him in all at once before pulling back to tease the tip of him with his tongue.
He growled as the blue-eyed cop continued to suck, nip, and tease his flesh. Such gently motions filling him with unknown emotions. It was so good, so wonderful to be treated this way, as if he was important, loved, needed.
Now it's hard for me
When my heart's still on the mend
Open up to me
Reaching behind him, Seto searched for the bottle of baby oil that he knew Mai kept on the small shower seat. Finding the bottle, he flipped the cap open, never taking his mouth from Yami's arousal as he poured some of the silky liquid into his hand.
Placing the bottle back on the floor of the stall, Seto took his now coated hand and ran the back of it up the inside of Yami's thigh, relishing in the shiver that ran down the lithe body, till he reached the desired location of the teen's entrance.
Shifting his legs, Yami placed his hands on Seto's shoulders, giving him better balance as he felt one finger begin to probe him. His fingers gripped tighter on to the cop's smooth flesh and threw his head back with a moan as a humming sensation enveloped his length. "Mmm…Seto."
More sounds escaped his mouth as a second finger was added, scissoring him with complete ease, lightly teasing the bundle of nerves inside of him. As the third finger was added, Yami abruptly came; filling the bathroom with his primal sounds as Seto greedily swallowed everything that was offered.
Yami whimpered as Seto removed his fingers and grabbed his hand as he carefully pulled the teen closer to him, nuzzling the junction of his thigh before he stood up to move to the shower seat, bringing Yami with him.
Sitting down on the cool surface, he carefully helped Yami straddle his waist, hovering slightly over his own hard, aching member. He looked deep into Yami's eyes as he asked; "Are you sure you want this?"
He nodded his head, hands braced on the Seto's shoulders. "I want to feel. I'm tired of fighting, tired of being in control of everything. Help me. Show me." He whispered out as crimson eyes looked away, fighting the battle to shed more tears.
That plea tore at Seto's heart, and with a silent promise never to turn his back on this young man, he slowly helped Yami lower himself on to his erection, being mindful of the other's back.
Twin moans of pleasure sounded over the running water. Neither noticed the chilling temperature the spray had taken as they both were over taken by the sensations of being joined together.
As Yami took a moment to rest his head on Seto's shoulder, the rookie began to place light kisses on the bronzed neck, willing himself to wait till the teen had adjusted. The sweet torture of being inside warm tight walls and not moving was driving him crazy. His eyes closed briefly, till he heard Yami's deep voice telling him he was ready.
A slow pace was set, the blue-eyed cop helping the teen rock back and forth. Carefully placed hands rested on slim hips, making sure he didn't cause any further injury. Seto growled as Yami picked up the pace, hot panting breaths intermingled with moans worked their way to his ears, sending him further into a state of ecstasy.
Yami's mind and body were beyond all reason now. Such sweet tender love making opening him up to things he had never felt before. Each caress, nip, lick, kiss, trust drawing him further and further into a world he only thought was a fantasy, something that he would never be able to experience before. But this one person, a cop and in all reality an enemy, was causing his carefully built world to come crashing down with him. Every cry that escaped his lips was not only for the passion that was sweeping through his body but also because of the new found treasure he was receiving.
What if I was good to you?
What if you were good to me?
What if I could hold you till I feel you move inside of me?
He moaned again as Seto bit at the junction of his neck then lovingly soothed the area with his tongue. Gods, was this what normal people felt? Here and now there wasn't a need for secrecy, no need to worry about what or who was touching him, no worry about if he would get the money he had worked for, if the man inside him would decide to take his anger out on him. All of this was so different but utterly perfect. To think this is what he had been missing all his life. A safe haven, a place where he could let down his guard and actually feel for once.
Working his hand between their bodies, Seto grasped Yami's neglected erection and began to pump it in time with each thrust. His eyes remained glued to Yami's face as he watched the damaged teen seem to have come to some sort of understanding within himself. He gasped as crimson eyes opened up and smiled at him.
That smile, something he had never seen before, was more beautiful than all the precious jewels in the world. "So beautiful," he whispered as he leaned forward and captured those lips with his own.
Soon, the wonderful sensations, the heated breath, feral sounds that echoed off the walls, new found realizations sent Yami over the edge pulling Seto along with him. Shivering as his body started to come down from its high, Yami laid his head on the warm inviting shoulder before him. "Thank you," he replied as his eyes slid closed.
A gentle kiss was placed on his temple as Seto carefully wrapped his arms around the lithe body, pulling them impossibly closer.
"Will you stay with me tonight?" the rookie heard Yami ask him, lips moving against his neck.
What if it was paradise?
What if we were symphonies?
What if I gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you?
"Not just tonight," he murmured as he picked the small teen up, eager to leave the cold shower to seek the comforts of a warm bed. "Someway, somehow, I will stay with you forever."
I don't wanna be lonely any moreDragon: When I first heard the song Lonely no More by Rob Thomas I knew I had to put in this story, in this chapter. The lyrics were just too perfect not to include them. Hope you enjoyed the emotional mess Yami was and can now see why he was uke.