Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even want to own them?
Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)
(I'm so sorry about the lack of updates for the past two weeks, but I've had to study for exams. But now? Freedom! twirls around and laughs ecstatically while feverishly opening a Buffy DVD No more exams! Yay! And thanks a million to Firestar, pinkpunkmonkey, and BAKAMAN for reviewing! And another thanks to everyone who have been waiting so patiently: ) )
8 8 8
What the hell was possessing me?
What evil claw of base corruption had me twisted in its unrelenting grasp?
What nightmare of a hell dimension was causing me to scream in the throes of its hideous world?
Why the hell was I being so melodramatic?
The real question?
Why the hell was I helping the Scoobies?
8 8 8
I had to know for sure. As Dawn and I walked to the Sunnydale hospital to check if Anya was okay, I decided that I had to know for sure why a certain bleached blonde, irritating, cocky, arrogant, pain-in-my-ass, former arch-nemesis was acting a role that looked suspiciously like it had 'WHITE HAT' printed on the script in big, bold letters.
Throwing me the sword when the lava-demon, Toth, had been down. The chip hadn't even fired, which meant that he'd been trying to help me with no thought of trying to kill me, even though without the chip, he could have done so easily in that position. And if Spike wasn't trying to kill me, an apocalypse was coming. And that's what I was afraid of. Because it just wasn't possible. And how had he managed to turn up in the right place to save Dawn? And why had he helped them go after Dracula? Buffy didn't buy the 'we were old rivals' story. Sure, she wouldn't be surprised that the irritating vampire had made an enemy of the eminent undead Transylvanian, but the Spike of the old days would have waited by casually for Dracula to kill her, and then fought against him himself. Why help them? Why, in fact, even bother to warn them?
Stupid vampire. So much easier to deal with when he was trying to kill me.
8 8 8
"What's up?" Willow asked the next day when Buffy called the meeting. Buffy normally stayed pretty still, but today, she was paced the floor in her living room incessantly. They'd decided to have it at her house because she was meant to be looking after Dawn, even though Cassandra and Daniel were there too.
"I don't know," Buffy exhaled. "But something is. Spike. Why's he helping us?"
"Buffy's right," Riley backed her up. Buffy smiled at him. So ever-dependable. "Spike's a vampire. He's a demon. And what my training has always taught me? Demons are there to be killed."
Dawn clenched her fist and would have stomped down the stairs and argued viciously when she felt Daniel's restraining hand.
"If they know we're listening, they'll stop talking and we won't get this chance again," he hissed. "Besides, this way we can warn Spike if anything happens."
Dawn ground her teeth and nodded her head slowly. She couldn't help it though. Her blood was rising at Riley, of all people, spouting off so self-righteously. Inside, she knew that he couldn't help it, and that was what he'd been taught, but if her inner instincts were correct, she was detecting a hint of jealous envy that laced through the ex-soldier's voice every time he spoke of Spike. And she trusted her inner instincts.
"I won't go so far as to say we should kill him," Giles interrupted. "After all, he has been very helpful as of late."
"And he's not really that bad," Willow chirped. At everyone's sudden look, she made a face. "Okay, discounting the hundred-plus years of torturing and maiming and rampaging."
"Despite that and the fact that he's tried to kill Buffy and everyone else several times, I think he's quite alright for a vampire," Anya commented honestly. "Especially a master vampire, at that. Most of them are usually either insanely evil or just insane."
"And you're saying Spike's not insanely evil?" Riley snorted, at the same time that Buffy laughed and said "Are you saying Spike's not insane?"
"Well, maybe a little," Anya conceded. "But not insane-insane-whacko! Like some of the others. Even Angelus, you know. We heard a lot of his exploits, us vengeance demons. Got called on him a couple of times. He was a nasty one that. Wasn't much better even with a soul."
"Ahn!" Xander cried sneaking a look at Buffy as he spoke for the first time. He'd been unnaturally silent during the entire time, as if he was deep in thought. Anya's candid words had snapped him out of it, however.
"What?" Anya asked defensively. "It's true! I didn't see much of him, but unsouled, he was a terror, and with a soul, he spent one hundred years living on rats in the London slums!"
"Dear Lord!" Giles gasped, truly horrified. "The London Slums in the 1900's? What was he thinking?"
"Exactly my point!" Anya said triumphantly.
Buffy had remained rather quiet during this, and Riley perused her intently. When she spoke, however, it was to guide them back to the topic at hand.
"If Spike isn't insanely evil, he's at least insane," she stated. "I want to know why he's helping us."
"H-has anyone even n-noticed that he's s-stopped asking f-for money?" Tara couldn't help the stutter. She had never known pre-chipped Spike, and she trusted her intuition and her psychic skills that the vampire was not insanely evil. And she couldn't help noticing how much he swaggered and boasted, and the feeling that she had that it was just a mask, near-perfected by a century of pretending.
"So he has," Giles reflected. "Well then. This makes this even more..."
Buffy knew that her Watcher was going to say 'fascinating', and start using Spike as a test subject for a thesis on master vampires rendered helpless. She cut him off.
"Unusual," she finished for him. "And I can't help but be suspicious."
"Why?" Anya asked. "He's been helping us. And that spell of yours. That enjoining spell. It helped you to see him, didn't it? So all you need to do is re-bind, and then you'll know."
"It's not that simple, Ahn," Xander said tiredly. "He's evil, remember?"
The way he said it was like he was trying to convince himself.
"But it's like… what was that thing you explained to me the other day? Yes! That saying! It's like looking a gift horse in the mouth. Not that there are such things as gift horses, and all, but you know what I mean. Why waste time stressing and being suspicious about master vampires trying to help you?"
"Being suspicious is kind of her job, Ahn," Xander laughed, his voice strained.
Anya fell silent, muttering under her breath something indistinguishable and inaudible. Her head still hurt from when the large vampire had knocked her down, but luckily it had only been serious enough to warrant an overnight stay at the hospital.
"I say we should just go stake him now," Riley said, his voice hard and cold. "To hell with all of the other crap. He's up to something."
Even Buffy recoiled from that. "But he's helpless. And he's been helping. What if we can use his demon contacts?"
"Buffy?" Riley rounded on her in disbelief. "You were just saying a minute ago that you were suspicious of him!"
"Yeah, well, I still am!" Buffy defended herself. "But Anya's right. The Hellmouth is growing again. Slayery instincts. Something's gonna happen, and when it does, we need all the people we've good. As much as I hate to say it… Spike didn't accomplish anything yesterday when he went and broke half his ribs to save Dawn."
"No, he accomplished something, alright," Riley glared into the distance as if he was picturing staking the master vampire himself. "He's worming his way into your good books. If you're right, and there is going to be a big fight, he'll betray us at the moment we need him and then everything will be lost. You can't trust a demon, Buffy, even if he's 'harmless'."
"I'm not saying I'm trusting him!" Buffy snapped back. "But we can use him. And… I don't think he'll betray us."
"You can't trust a demon, Buffy! Is nothing I'm saying getting through to you? I mean, I would have thought your experience with Angel would have shown that. All my training…"
Buffy cut him off as anger began to swell at his condescending attitude and the mention of her ex. "Riley, in case you've forgotten, your training was by a group of incompetent idiots who were intruding on my territory and who pumped you so full of drugs I'm surprised you're still standing. And Angel has nothing to do with this."
"Angel has everything to do with this!" Riley ranted, Buffy's words striking deep at his insecurities. He knew he shouldn't have mentioned her ex. He knew that he should calm down, maybe walk away and continue this discussion another time. But why couldn't she just see? "But he hurt you before, and I won't let…"
"You won't let him?" Buffy demanded, a dangerous glint in her eye. "You won't let what happen? This is nothing to do with Angel, Riley, I've said it enough times! Just because I think that Spike won't betray us…"
"Why?" Riley snorted, cutting her off. "The spell? What's wrong with you, Buffy? As I said, you were saying only minutes ago that he was up to something!"
"Well… maybe he… I don't know…" Buffy looked confused. Glowering, Riley stomped out of the front door attempting to keep his anger in check, never glancing behind to see the three on the staircase.
"You're right, Buffy," Willow said after a long pause as they digested the fact that Buffy and Riley had just had a fairly heated argument in front of them. "I don't think he'll betray us."
Buffy was silent. The silence spread around the room, and if they'd been listening, they would have almost heard the three teenagers trembling with a mixture of anger and tenseness and relief in the hallway.
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When she was pissed off, she went patrolling. It was like a natural order of things, after all. She could vent her rage on vamps with none of her friends to stare at her or draw back in fear at the dark side that she unleased in her pure anger. Buffy was still fuming when the first vampire came at her. A fierce joy came upon her as she pounded into him and heard the satisfying crack of his bones as she threw him against a crypt. Just as she was about to finish her kill, however, another figure appeared, swiped the vamp's legs from under him, and dusted him.
"Hey, that was my vampire," Buffy said almost petulantly.
"You still angry at me, then?" Riley asked.
Remembering who she was talking to and what had transpired earlier that day, Buffy hardened. "Yeah. I am. Now I'm going to hunt more vamps, so excuse me…"
"Whoah… Riley grabbed her elbow. "Hunt?"
Buffy cursed her slip. This was between her, Giles, the First Slayer, and the vamps she hunted. The balance of predator and prey. Riley would never understand. "I meant patrol. I'm going to go patrol. And then we can talk."
"Why can't we talk now?"
Buffy's scathing reply was lost midst the underbrush crashing and then two figures appeared, rolling together in a deadly fight of fist and fangs, one laughing. Buffy recognized the timbre and the pure emotion behind that laugh and almost smiled. Spike. He was hunting, just like her.
Spike levered his boots under the other vampire and kicked hard, sending him flying to hit the exact spot that Buffy had thrown her vampire.
While Buffy was content to watch him decimate his foe, suddenly feeling all the rage drain out of her, Riley was not.
"What are you doing here, Spike?" he demanded.
"What does it look like?" Spike cheerfully crushed his opponent's nose. "I'm hunting. Just a spot o' violence before bedtime."
"Keep out of our way, Spike. We're not going to take this much longer."
Spike dusted his vampire, and then turned around confused. Buffy noticed he still favoured his injured side somewhat as he swaggered towards them.
"What are you talking about, Cub Scout?"
"Stop trying to worm your way into Buffy's good books. She's just about done with you."
"Worm my way into your good books?" Spike laughed in disbelief and Buffy thought she might have detected a hint of hurt in his voice. She quickly dismissed the thought. "Are you crazy?"
Before either Riley or Buffy could reply, Spike sized them up. Reading their body language, he slowly smiled.
"So that's the case, huh?" Spike cocked an eyebrow and turned towards her. "I'm sure the Slayer has a right to speak to herself in all this. Come now, Slayer. What am I doing that requires you to stake me? Helping save your little sister? Amusing myself in my spare time? What do you expect me to do, sit at home knitting cunning sweaters?"
"Shut up, Spike," Buffy said automatically.
Spike wasn't fooled. He studied them again, and the smirk came out into full force.
"Well now… there's been a little fight in paradise, has there? What's wrong, Slayer? He's not satisfying you in bed?"
Riley would have staked him then and there if Spike hadn't skipped away from his clumsy attack. "Or is it something else? Oh… I get it. You're not welcome here, Captain. Slayer wants you to stay at home so you don't get hurt. I've got some knitting needles you can borrow."
"Shut up, demon," Riley glared at him, restraining himself from (attempting) to rip the vampire's head off. "You don't know anything."
I'll come back later. Without Buffy. Then I'll show him.
"Okay, when the macho pissing contest is over with, I'd like to go home," Buffy said dryly. "C'mon, Riley."
8 8 8
I watched as she dragged Captain Cardboard away. And the highlight of my life? Or rather, unlife? I was just enjoying watching Whitebread being shown up by the Slayer when she turned around and completed my night.
"Oh, and Spike?"
"Yes Slayer?"
"Thanks for helping me save Dawn."
I stared after them for a long time, before almost dancing back to my crypt, ecstatic with joy for no apparent reason. Luckily no-one saw me. Wouldn't have done my Big Bad image any good.
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