Title: Intimation

Genre: Angst

A/N: inspired by watching ep 306 and Zoe's trial. Short angsty one piece with much subtext, please R&R ppl!

Intimation

-By-

Sakura

Ruth accepts his offer to drive her homefrom court. They get into his car silently, Ruth in tears and Harry clenches and unclenches his jaw. Never mind what the others were saying about them right now, they needed to be within each other's presence to make it through. But they don't look at each other or say anything, Harry stares ahead at the road and Ruth stares out the window at the fuzzy spots of light scattered on the wet pavement.

Ruth fiddles with the turquoise ring on her right ring finger. She bites her lip and looks at it, itching to tilt her head ever so subtly to glimpse at the man next to her. He looks so defeated; as if he feels that it's entirelyhis fault for what happened to Zoe. She admires his loyalty to his junior officers (including her) but at times, it could be quite taxing.

Ruth takes in his appearance, everything from his tie to his crisp white shirt, and she wonders how long it took for him to get ready this morning. She feels an acute pang of anguish as she imagines him standing in front of a mirror in a sordid hotel, staring at a familiar stranger.

As thoughts and memories of him began to overtake her, she sighs and turns to look back out at the pedestrians cross the street as they came to a stoplight. They still don't say anything, they just keep on driving, and the empty nothingness in the air unnerves her. It compels her to speak. She wants to forget that one of her friends and colleagues could be put into prison for ten to fifteen years or be exiled to Chile.

So she says the one thing that they had on a subconscious level of understanding, agreed to never bring up. She blurts it out without thinking, as she often does whenever she's around him.

"Everyone thinks you're screwing me, Harry." The second it leaves her mouth, blood rushes to her cheeks and her face lights on fire.

She braves a glance at his face for his reaction. Strangely enough, he laughs softly, probably because of the ridiculousness of it all, but he plays along with it. It seems he wants to forget as much as she does.

"Really. Who is 'everyone' ?" He asks calmly, but his eyes say otherwise. Ruth inhales, attempting to steel herself, and thinks of a reply.

"Just about everyone on the grid. I hear that some people on the third floor are betting on it. Sam spreads most of it around, and I'm quite sure she's a regular up there."

She tries to sound neutral, as if she had no preconceived idea of how he would interpret this.

"Ah. Well they're entitled to their own opinion, aren't they Ruth?" Ruth sees his hands as they grip a little harder on the wheel, and he stiffens just a little in the driver's seat.

Ruth bites her lip, andwonders where she found the nerve to say such a thing. Maybe she thought of Harry as her Harry too often, much too often to be considered appropriate. She remembers that he asked her a question.

"I suppose. Doesn't it make you uncomfortable? It casts doubts on our professionalism."

Ruth watches him attempt to ignore her gaze by staring intently at the red light as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. She notes how he makes an obvious point not to look at her, revealing to her what he was trying so desperately to conceal.

"Quite frankly, Ruth, I'm flattered that all these people think we're sleeping together. A little gossip never hurt anyone." He pauses for an effect, "I can see why it would worry you though," He briefly makes eye contact with her and then turns back to the road, "You don't want to be sacked for such a severe breach of protocol and have to return to GCHQ now do you?"

Ruth glares at him as menacingly as possible and then gives up, realizing that it wouldn't earn so much as a blink from him. She sighs for the umpteenth time and stares at her lap.

"No. No I wouldn't."

He nods a little and they go back to playing their everlasting game of avoiding each other's eyes. Nowthey're back to the silence they started with. Ruth absently fingers a strand of dark hair, fondly amused at how he chose 'sleeping together' instead of 'screwing'and watches his face for anything significant. He's got his game face back, and she knows that he won't crack under her gaze. Not again anyway. But she decides that she likes 'sleeping together' better, as it was a thought that often crossed her mind when confronted with rumors of their relationship. They finally arrive at the front of her flat. She sees the longing in his eyes, the pleading look that begged to let him drive her around a little longer just so he could be near her. She finds that she wants to say 'yes, please take me away from here' but she remains silent and slowly gathers her bag to her body, preparing herself to get out of the car. As she opens the door, she thanks him for the ride and he dismisses her thanks with a mute nod. Ruth steps out onto the pavement and shuts the door. She watches him drive away and waves a little, hoping that he would spare a backward glance for her. He doesn't.