Disclaimer: If I'm lucky, one day I'll own a horse and a house. If a miracle happens before then, I'll own Teen Titans.
Warning: DO NOT ATTEMPT CPR UNLESS YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. Luckily for them, Beast Boy does. Don't ask. ...There's nothing we can do... is a line break.
Pairings: Shouldn't have to ask by now! Another pairing pops up in this chapter.
Chapter Three: Room to Breathe
Raven walked out of Beast Boy's room, yawning slightly and sniffing the air. Bacon? With an almost eager spring in her step she came to the once abandoned main room. Beast Boy stood at the stove, a frying pan in one mittened hand and holding his nose with the other, trying not to look at the bacon, which wasn't the best thing to do when you're cooking something. She grinned. Twenty years old and he was still a fifteen year old at heart. The 'him' in question turned, face lighting up at the sight of her in the new uniform he had put on the desk after stealing it from the old room. Her face was a mask.
"You went into my room." He blinked, caught off guard.
"But- you said it wasn't your room anymore and-" She watched him stall, gesturing wildly with the frying pan. After another moment he ground to a halt, just looking helpless.
"You went in my room." Then, unable to stop, Raven cracked into a smile. Beast Boy just stared as she laughed, feeling another one of Slade's holds on her slip off. Unbending she sat at the bar, seeing his 'she-must-have-finally-cracked' expression as a last giggle faded. Shrugging helplessly as she resumed a straight face, Beast Boy slid the bacon in front of her, wincing as she picked up a piece while he drew up a plate with tofu cubes on it. Raven smiled inside. He must be feeling really guilty, or else he would never have even touched the bacon.
Wait, she thought. Exactly how old is this? She examined a strip closely. Edible, yes, but expired? You never knew…
"Umm… Enjoy?" Raven nodded, finishing off the last piece and a glass of water, she turned to face the green teen beside her. She had been hungry.
"So. Where's Robin? They never mentioned over the radio; security risks, I guess." The thought of why she had been listening to those talks almost made her lose what she had just eaten, but Raven ruthlessly slammed down that urge. Beast Boy chewed rapidly on the last tofu cube and swallowed.
"In Gotham City Mental Institution. With Starfire." Regret was evident in his voice.
"Then let's get going." Beast Boy took her plate, carefully washed the dishes, and placed each gently in the cupboard. At Raven's raised eyebrow he shrugged.
"I was the last one left… I kinda had to do it when everyone was gone." They walked together downstairs to the crisp morning. A green sea gull took off, then landed and shifted into an alternately embarrassed and sorrowful Beast Boy. "Uh," he said, rubbing the back of his head, "I'm sorry. I kinda forgot."
"Me too," Raven said, a haunted look in her eyes. "Me too."
Hesitating, Beast Boy put his arms around her. She leaned into him slightly, drawing comfort and love into her chilled body. Then he changed, clasping a talon around each of her arms and lifting up into the open sky.
...There's nothing we can do...
All too soon they came to the Institution, a cold, impersonal white building. Automatic doors hissed open and the two walked in, stopping at the secretary's desk. The fat lady didn't even do a double take at either of them, but looked suspicious when she heard they wanted to see Robin. Peering at them from behind obviously fake lashes and the most horrible green eye shadow Raven had ever seen, the woman rasped out a floor number, six, and told them that he was the only patient on the floor. Ushering them on with a filed and perfectly manicured hand, Raven knew she was turning to gossip with the nurses. She ignored the whispering ladies as she hit the 6th floor button on the elevator. The ride up seemed to take forever, the tight space cramping inwards with every minute it took to rise another floor.
When at last the doors opened, both walked out and were greeted by the sight of Starfire, braced for battle, the green glow ready to be unleashed. Raven's heart stopped at the sight of her, déjà vu taking her back to the day she left. Starfire realized who it was in the split second it took Raven's stomach to plummet down the six floors they had just traveled up and dropped her hands, staring openly at the slim and familiar figure of her teammate.
"R-Raven?" She asked, incredulous. A second later Raven was firmly held in the weeping alien's arms, heart restarting even as she gasped for breath.
"Oh, Friend Raven! How I have longed to see you- and apologize to you, for even thinking of harming you! Please, say you will forgive me?" Raven's hand tugged frantically on Star's shirt until the over enthusiastic alien held her at arm's length, tears threatening to overflow again from her big green eyes.
"Do you forgive me?" There was a pleading note in her trembling voice. Raven studied her face, having regained her breath.
"Of course, Starfire. How could I not?" Beast Boy edged carefully away, turning his gaze instead to the ancient papers pasted onto the crumbling wall. It both disturbed and angered him that they had put Robin up here, when, as a hero, he had done so much good; but that was the way things went, wasn't it? The sounds of talking was punctuated by gasps and more crying as Raven told Starfire what had happened to her. Starfire in turn was probably outlining what had happened to them once she was gone; the truth and details (as in other than the rumors spread by TV) and their perspective while being betrayed by Terra. Once the two girls came within earshot, he turned around. By Starfire's furious, barely contained expression, Raven had spilled more to the other girl than she had to him. He mentally shrugged; a girl would understand more. He knew all that he needed to know.
Raven stopped before the thick door that would open to where Robin was. Starfire rested a hand on her shoulder; Raven looked at her.
"He may not recognize you; he may even attack you. Are you sure?" Raven turned back to the door.
"I need to settle with him." With that she opened it and slipped in.
It was neat- she wasn't surprised. Even if the Robin she knew was gone, the basic, ingrained nature remained. Raven moved into the middle, purposely keeping her body language casual but alert. After a moment a shadow separated from the rest and Robin slid into the light. His uniform was clean and straightened, while his hair lay down without the constant hair gelling needed to insure proper spikes. His gaze behind the ever-present mask flicked over to her; she didn't turn her eyes away but made direct contact. Made herself a threat. With an inarticulate snarl he lunged, punching and kicking. Raven ducked and dodged, eyebrows lifting slightly. Even half-sane he was pretty good; though nothing compared to his old self. A lightening meant to kill punch snaked towards her head. The two stilled; her upper arm stayed where it was, having pushed it away from her face. He breathed heavily, starting to draw away.
"Robin." Her cold, demanding voice cut the air and he froze again. For a long moment neither moved; then Robin's fist dropped and the other hand came up, touching his mask. Then he looked up, confusion written in his face.
"Raven?" Robin seemed to jolt back to reality. "You betrayed us!" Raven barely had a moment to remember that he didn't know Terra had betrayed them before he had her pinned on the floor. Face contorted with rage, he twisted one of her arms as his other one pressed down on her throat. She struggled frantically, hating the flashbacks of memories flooding her mind even as she fought to get him off of her. "WHY?" Violet eyes shot open and she stilled, lying limply under him. Her hand twitched feebly, slowly moving to the arm he held. Robin didn't noticed until she jerked the hand grasping the cloth; instinctively he pressed harder and her eyes rolled up, her head falling to the side. But Robin didn't notice- he was staring at her exposed arm.
Carved into the flesh, over and over again until the scars built into legible letters, was the word 'Slade'. His mask widened and he rolled off the still girl, yanking up the other sleeve of her leotard. Fingers deftly probed the bone of her arm. The telltale bumps that meant repeated breaks were like piercing daggers, striking to the core- if Raven had gone to Slade willingly, why had he hurt her? And why hadn't she used her powers? Suddenly it struck him that Raven wasn't breathing. Grabbing her shoulders, he shook her, fury abated while fear took over him. If he had killed her- The door burst open and Beast Boy flew in, having heard Robin's hated filled shouts the moment before. He picked up Robin and threw him roughly in the direction of the window. Robin managed to land on his feet, feeling shaken as his teammate knelt beside Raven's form.
"Raven? Raven!" She didn't respond, or breathe. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER, ROBIN?" Without waiting for an answer Beast Boy tilted her head back, cheek close to her mouth to feel for any breath. There was none. Cursing, he pressed his mouth over hers and breathed. Raven's chest rose slightly and Beast Boy took away his face, letting her body exhale on its own. Then he blew another breath into her, staring anxiously into the motionless face as her chest fell. "Raven!" Desperation lanced his words and Robin realized he had been wrong, somehow. Raven hadn't betrayed them- then who had?
Beast Boy did fifteen chest compressions, watching Raven's slack face anxiously.
"C'mon, Rae, don't you dare leave me, don't slip away from me again, don't even think about it-" Two more rescue breaths did nothing, anguish at her stillness filling Beast Boy's face as Robin watched, feeling every piece of firm ground he had known slip out from under his feet. He had killed Raven- his teammate. His body shook with the tremors, and it was only then that he saw Starfire standing, horror stricken, in the doorway. Oh God, he had killed her-
There was a gasping sound and Raven coughed, air wheezing out from her lips. She coughed again and Beast Boy grabbed her shoulders, propping her up as she gasped. Her hand lifted and Robin watched their fingers twined around each other, each as unaware of it as the other. Then Beast Boy turned a furious gaze on him and started to rise.
"You attacked her, you bastard, you piece of-" Raven pulled her hand, dragging his attention to her. She shook her head, but that didn't appease the enraged teen. "How could you?" He demanded, but thankfully not rising from his position with Raven leaning into him.
"I didn't know." Robin's voice shook, and he didn't try to stabilize it. "I thought she had betrayed us- I didn't know!" Starfire's eyes flew from Raven to Robin and then to Beast Boy. She moved swiftly, putting a hand on Robin's shoulder and causing him to turn towards her. She searched the mask for an answer, unable to find one in the barrier he had raised between himself and the world, but belief in his words filled her. She turned to Beast Boy.
"He does not lie." She felt, like a tangible thing underneath her hand, Robin's surprise and relief at her words. Beast Boy opened his mouth to say something else but Raven tightened her fingers, wobbly rising to her feet. He hastily helped her up, grim set of his mouth disappearing as she rested her head on his chest. After a moment Raven untangled her fingers and turned him, giving him a little push towards the door. Beast Boy stopped, refusing, but her violet gaze told him to trust her. Tensing and then nodding, he walked out the door, but Starfire was sure he was just outside the door. She withdrew her hand and left too, leaving Raven and Robin in the room alone as the door closed with a snick.
"Raven, I-" She cut him off.
"Don't apologize, Robin. I understand."
"Slade."
"Slade." When he moved to leave, she pinned him with her violet gaze. "You snapped hunting him, Robin. I know. He made me watch the video he taped of it." The mask widened and then narrowed. Raven shook her head slightly. "I did not help him or tell him. He had Terra for that." The name was a curse on her tongue, and Robin made the connection. "And I tried to leave. Trust me on that." Robin pretended not to see her swallow hard, wincing at the bruise starting to form on her neck. She composed herself rapidly. "Let's go. I know someone wants to talk to you." She opened the door, motioning for him to wait. Starfire stepped back in and his heart rose. Slowly she walked to him, pausing a few feet away.
"Star?" Her eyes filled with tears and she threw her arms around him.
"Robin! I was so afraid-" Raven glanced towards the corridor and Beast Boy nodded, the door closing.
"He attacked you, Raven."
"He didn't know that I hadn't betrayed them, either. AND he came out of it sane. We need him sane, Beast Boy. NOT dead." Beast Boy tightened his jaw, and then sighed.
"So what'd ya do?"
"Just tried to reach the Robin I knew and connected with when the toxic dust was in his system." He nodded. "You know, I have a feeling that they're doing more than 'talking' in there." Raven added, a mischievous smile on her face. When he looked at her, slightly surprised that she could be joking after just narrowly dying, she turned that soft smile on him. "And I wouldn't say it's a bad idea." His eyes met hers and were reassured by the love and calm he found there as he held her in his arms. It was a sweet kiss, startling in it's intensity- but it wasn't everyday that your loved one nearly died. When they broke apart he looked out a dusty window that had a tiny view into the garden six floors below.
"Finding out Terra was the one betraying us, instead of you, hurt. Badly. Terra was… special. She laughed at my jokes, hung out with me; was more than a friend, in all honesty." He felt her tense slightly next to him, but was glad when she didn't pull away. He needed to talk about this. "I had a crush on her. Albeit a hell of a crush on her, but even before she revealed herself I was coming to that conclusion. It was a crush, but nothing more. I was in love with someone else." She lifted her head, looking at him as he continued. "I was in love with the girl I had told to never come back. The girl I thought I never wanted to see again filled my thoughts." He looked directly at her. "I loved you."
Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth, the words on the tip of her tongue. It was only for a moment that she struggled; then Raven spoke words once taboo and unknown to her.
"I… I love you too." It was enough for both. (Sick minds OUT of the gutter, people!)
When Starfire and Robin opened the door five minutes later, they saw Raven and Beast Boy standing there, waiting impatiently.
"Let's go. We need to find Cyborg." Raven said in her monotone voice. No one saw fit to mention anything about Raven's crooked cloak, Starfire's mussed hair, Robin's flipped mask or Beast Boy's slightly pink tinge.
While all the nurses and doctors stared, amazed to see Robin walking calmly out of the place he had been brought tranquilized into four months earlier, no one tried to stopped them.
...There's nothing we can do...
After putting in a few long distance calls to the now 'retired' Jinx and Cy's remaining family, they came back together at the table to confer.
"Well, he's not with Jinx," Beast Boy said. Raven raised an eyebrow. Noting her look, he hurried to explain. "After her group thrashed us a few times, Jinx quit the villain business. She said she was 'tired of kicking our sorry asses' and retired. It was a possibility…"
"And nothing from his dad, either." Robin sighed, curling and uncurling a hand. "Where could he be? We need him, and he's long since deactivated the tracer. He BUILT the tracer, for crying out loud."
"Did you attempt to do the ring up of Bumblebee?" Everyone looked at Starfire. She blushed slightly at the attention. "Did no one else see the 'spark' between them?" Slowly Raven nodded.
"She's got a point." She grabbed the communicator from Beast Boy and hit a button. After a bit Bumblebee's face appeared on the screen. "Oh, hey ya'll, sorry it took me-" She stopped when she recognized Raven. "What the hell are you- how do you have one?" Her face reflected distrust and anger. "Did you take it from one of their corpses once you betrayed them, traitor? Oh God, Cyborg-" It turned off as she turned away from the screen. No one moved for a moment. Then, slowly, Raven put the communicator on the table and rose, face set in a violently wavering mask.
"Raven, I'm sure she didn't mean it-" Beast Boy stopped as she turned slightly towards him. Her face was deathly pale and her violet eyes were empty. Blank. She walked out and he pushed over the chair, suddenly released from the tension. "Raven!" Oh God, he had no idea what she was going to do- Racing up the steps, he reached the roof. Raven stood on the edge, hood up as the cloak snapped around her. Fear made him fly, wrapping arms around her waist and roughly pulling her back. They collapsed and Beast Boy was amazed at the violent sobs that ripped from her slight body. Finally she sat up and he wiped her eyes with a thumb. Raven smiled half-heartedly.
"You know, I haven't cried this much in my entire life. You must be bad for me."
"Why Raven! Is that humor I hear? A joke!" Beast Boy gasped in mock horror.
"Yes, and if you want to keep yours, let alone you mind, you'll shut up. Now." She glared at him, annoyance twitching her features when he broke into semi-hysterical laughter.
"Whohoo… Raven made two jokes in one day!" He gasped, calming down as he tried to catch his breath. "Is the world ending yet?" Sobering, Beast Boy looked at her. "At least we know Cyborg is there. She was going to talk to someone. I'm sure of it." Raven slid her hood back up, rising. At that moment the alarm went off, Robin having reset it.
"It appears the criminals are squabbling amongst themselves. Someone has to teach them some manners."
A/N: Raven does seem to like near death experiences. I'm sorry that this wasn't up yesterday- when I originally planned to post Chap. Three- but while typing it I had to revise the whole Robin/Raven encounter, due to the fact that he didn't know she hadn't betrayed him and ended up adding a whole 'nother page to the ones already typed.Not everything goes according to the plan. Not even according to mine, which is sad because I am the author... Anyway, please review!
Yaa: Your reviews went and made my day! I can't say thank you enough to let you know how encouraging it is to know that you liked my story that much- Thanks!
DarkSin: Glad you liked it! Hope this is soon enough.
MollyKat: I'll keep working on it, no fear. Chapter Four is just around the corner.
Once again, thanks for the reviews!