Disclaimer: Two more reviews so far! Yay!

Armbiter and the Sacred Icon

Part II

The Armbiter stared off into space and drooled as the cinematic blocks appeared at the top and bottom of the screen. The words 'Uncomfortable Silence' appeared in the bottom box. The blocks disappeared.

"Wow, that was freeaakkkyy" drooled the Armbiter, licking up the drool.

The Armbiter turned around and consulted his armoury.

One Covenant Carbine. Nice.

One crappy Plasma Pistol. Not Nice.

"WTF? The Plasma Pistol is like, sooo s(random noise)t! It has no tracking anymore and its rate of fire is s(another random noise)t! The Plasma Pistol in Halo was so much better, it like, had brilliant tracking AND felt powerful! This new Plasma Pistol is crap!" angrily protested the Armbiter. A few seconds of amazement ensued.

"Whoa, I just said some really technical things without going cross-eyed!" said the Armbiter. This is true. What is also true is that the PP (Plasma Pistol) in Halo 2 sux's. Its true. I think Bungie should bring back the old PP.

Anyways, the Armbiter a SUPA LASAR CANNON! (Sentinel Beam) on the floor. After discarding the PP and grabbing the SUPA LASAR CANNON, the Armbiter jumped up to a ledge and found Jar-Jar Binks. Or at least, a Grunt that thought it was JJB.

"MESA JAR JAR BINKS GRUNT!" said the JJB Grunt.

"Err, okay, you know, why don't you stay here and guard this place and get killed?"

"OH MOE MOE, MESA CANNOT DO DAT, MESA PROGRAMMED TO FOLLOW YOU!"

"Oh great, I'm on a ancient Forerunner installation, possibly surrounded by enemies, with a Grunt that thinks its Jar Jar Binks" explained the Armbiter.

"MESA HAPPY!" stated the Grunt.

"So, how do we activate this piston thing?" pondered the Armbiter, looking at the piston. The Armbiter fired at the glowy symbol thing. Nothing.

"MESA DOES THIS!" yelled the Grunt. The Grunt disappeared in a white flash and re-appeared dressed as an anime black/white/green/turquoise/yellow/purple mage

"BY THE POWER CRYSTAL ECKYPOOPARHNARDARDOOOO! I OPEN THEE PISTON!" intoned the Grunt. Nothing happened. 10 seconds later, still nothing. Then a little Forerunner robot came and opened the piston.

"SEE! MESA OPEN PISTON! MESA POWERFUL!" bellowed the Grunt. The Armbiter jumped down the hole, the Grunt followed. At the bottom, the Armbiter and company went through another piston, ran through a passageway and down another piston. Finally, the duo ran into a big room. A Gangsta Grunt and two Jerkalope's ran up to the duo.

"How u dion' Arby?" yelled the GG (Gangsta Grunt)

"hfjnhvhfuhvgf?" yelled a Jerkalope

"Meh?" said the Armbiter. Then two Sentinels flew in.

"We want to be your friends!" they yelled before firing at the assembled group.

"If you want to be our friends, why are you firing at us?" asked the Armbiter.

"We don't know!" was the reply. The Sentinels exploded and the group continued forth on their epic quest. As the Armbiter ran along a walkway, Tartarsauce's voice came onto the intercom.

"You have mail" said his high pitched voice.

"Really?"

"No" was the reply "but you've reached the Shield's Power grid. Many of my Brutes were 0wn3d trying to take it. Lets if you fare better, although I hope you get 0wn3d, that way I won't have to pay for a psychiatrist any more" said Tartarsauce.

"I have just one question"

"What?"

"What's a Shield Power grid?£ asked the Armbiter. Tartarsauce's head banging against a wall can be heard.

"SHUT UP! (bang) SHUT UP! (bang) SHUT UP!"

The intercom switched off and the Armbiter ran onwards and entered another bigass room. Two more Sentinels were there.

"Look! Friends!" yelled one.

"Will you be our friends? I love you!" said the other. Both fired at the group. One of the Sentinels was destroyed in a fiery ball of twisted metal.

"You killed him! That's not nice!" complained the last Sentinel, diving at the Armbiter. The Armbiter knocked the Sentinel onto the floor.

"Would you like me to sing you a song, john?" asked the Sentinel

"No, and my name is Armbiter"

"Would you?"

"No"

"D-a-i-s-y ,D-a-i-s-y,-g-i-v-e-m-e-y-o-u-r-a-n-s-w-e-r-d-o-…" sang the Sentinel before the Armbiter stamped on it.

"HE MELTED!" yelled JJB Grunt.

"NO HE DID NOT! I STAMPED ON HIM!" yelled the Armbiter, running forth. After passing through more passageways and pistons, the Armbiter reached the Power place.

"Stay in the shadows, wait until it loses interest. Then strike the beast its back is turned" said Tartarsauce.

"yay! More friends!" yelled the Enforcer, firing rockets at the Armbiter and co.

"Err, no" said the Armbiter, running onto the platform and 0wning the Enforcer.

The rest of the Armbiter's allies thankfully, I mean 'sadly', yes that's it, lay dead.

"OH THANK GOD, THE INTERNET AND THE XBOX THAT THEIR DEAD!" yelled the Armbiter, the button marked 'LOWERZ DERZ CoNtANEMENTZ Sheildszz,

The platform moved forward, and the Armbiter went high. The cinematic blocks come down and the words 'Buyers Remorse' appears. The a Phantom drops down.

"I'm not talking to you!" said Tartarsauce

"You're talking to me now" said the Armbiter.

"YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE!" yelled Tartarsauce, flying away. The platform entered a bigass room with an Enforcer, Sentinels and the Super Ninja Kungfo Fighting 1337ness Space Zombies aka The Flood

"Look! Another friend!" yelled the Enforcer.

"Yay!" yelled the Sentinels.

"Lol its da Armpitguy!" yelled a Combat Form

"Lol, he is a n00b!" said another.

"I am not!" protested the Armbiter.

"R TO!"

"R NOT!"

"R TO!"

"R NOT"!

"R TWO D TWO!"

"Yes?" asked R two de two "you called?"

"Go away, U n00b!"

"Okay!" said R two d two, falling off a cliff.

"I R NO N00B! AND I DON'T WANNA BE UR FRIEND!" bellowed the Armpitguy, I mean Armbiter, taking out a mini-gun and 0wning the Flood and Forerunners.

The Armpitguy ran through a door and met more Flood.

"N0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000B!" yelled a Flood Combat Form.

"I HAVE LIFE INSURANCE, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL" yelled another.

The Armbiter 0wned the flood and fell through a hole.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (deep breath) HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (hit ground painfully)"

The Armbiter got up and got high. Again. The cinematic blocks and the words '100,000 Years War' appeared and then disappeared. The Armbiter ran on a met some Elites.

"Look, it's the Armpitguy!" said an Elite n00b

"MY NAME IS ARMBITER!" yelled the Armbiter, killing the Elites and Flood. The Armbiter ran on a found Lippy, I mean, UEG.

"Where are the others? Did the Flood get them?" asked UEG.

"Ermmm, y-e-s… yes, the Flood… got them" replied the Armbiter, suspiciously.

The Armbiter looked at the big doors and bright light engulfed him.

Disclaimer: this took me a long time, so u better enjoy it!