It had been a long 26 hours in the waiting room. Everyone was on edge and irate. It felt as if the room was too small for the five of them. They sat in an uncomfortable silence for what felt like hours.
Mr. and Mrs. Stokes walked out of Nick's room with a used handkerchief tightly clenched in Mrs. Stokes hand.
"I would like you guys to go in there. You're his family too." Mrs. Stokes bit her lip as she tried not to cry.
"One at a time. We don't need excitement in there." Mr. Stokes said firmly while trying to console his wife.
It was no contest on who would go in first. No pulling straws or the occasional rock, paper, scissors game Nick and Warrick loved so much. As Warrick looked outside the rooms for the room numbers he paused at the big 1-4 on the door. His throat suddenly dried up and tears began to flow from his eyes.
"You can do it. Pull it together. Pull it together for Nick." Warrick whispered to himself as he carefully tip toed into the room.
The room was a decent size. There was Nick's bed which took up most of the room. A coffee table, scattered with tissues and paper coffee cups. Then there was a window looking over the Las Vegas Strip. Warrick looked out the window trying to think of the right words to say. Tears flowed from his eyes as he realized that almost every street on the strip was traveled once by him and his brother Nicholas Stokes.
In the corner was a table with 2 hospital style chairs. Warrick grabbed a Kleenex out of the box, and wiped his tears. He took in a long breath of air. Nick was in his hospital gown and had wires and IV's sticking out of his hands and arms, giving him nutrients and checking vitals. He had a tube in his throat and another in his stomach. Warrick couldn't stand seeing him like this. This was not Nick. This was Nick's body, but it was not the Nick that everyone had come to love and care for so dearly. Warrick wiped his tears one more time and realized that the others were waiting for there turn to sit and talk with Nick.
"Hey Buddy." The words were caught in his throat as he tried to sound as unaffected as he possibly could.
"How are you doin'?" Warrick laughed at himself as he realized what a ridiculous question it was.
"We miss you man. Come back to us. Soon." Warrick got up to leave. As he was headed for the door, he asked himself, "Is this all you want to say? Isn't there something else? This is you brother, your friend, the other half of you, and you have nothing else to say?" As Warrick thought about it, he lowered himself back into the chair next to Nick's bed.
"Nick… I'm so sorry man. I promised I'd always have you back. I really let you down this time. You should of never….." The words caught in his throat. "You should have never been left alone. But you're gonna come back. I have faith in you, man. You're stronger then this, Nicky." He grabbed onto Nick's hand and cradled it in his. Warrick lowered his head onto the mattress and just laid there listening to Nick's machine breath for him. His tears soaked the mattress as he sat there waiting. That's all he could do.
Warrick walked out of the room picking at the gauge that his hand was wrapped in and looking at the ground. He look up and saw 4 of his closest friends looking at him, waiting for a report on how Nick really was not how the doctors said he was.
Warrick stood there looking at them, not able to form words. He just stood there because he didn't know what to say.
Catherine couldn't handle the silence anymore and walked past Warrick down the everlasting hallway and into room 14. She stood at the door hoping that she could observe him from there.
"You can go in now miss." The friendly nurse who stitched up Warrick said in her nice "How can I help you?" voice.
"Oh, ummm, thank you." Catherine said agitated with the not only the nurse but herself.
"You were his supervisor. This happened on your watch. And now he's gone. Are you happy now?" Catherine swatted the thoughts out of her mind.
She stared at the bed and looked at the motionless, colorless body underneath the wires and tubes. Her stomach made the familiar jump into her throat. The exact same feeling she had when that sicko Walter Gordan sent them that live feed. When she saw him in the box.
"Suck it up Cath. Do it for him." Catherine thought to herself as she tried to figure out the right thing to do and say.
She walked into the room passed the bed, the table, and the chairs and straight to the window. Something out there drew her to the window. She wiped away her tears as she stared down at the people, tourists and natives alike.
The warmth from her breath made the window fog from the cold whether outside. She turned on her heel to face Nick.
"How could I let this happen to you?" She said in between each breath. "How?" The tears flowed from her eyes and she used her sleeve to catch them. "Why you Nick? You didn't do anything to anyone. You help people everyday. You're a damn fine CSI and you're a great man. You have a great life. Please, just come back to it. We need you Nicky." Soon she could not control herself. The silent tears turned in to muffled sobs. Her chest going through spazams as she tried to get air. She had the sudden urge to vomit. And walked out of the room, past Warrick, Greg, Sara, and Grissom straight outside and vomited in the flowerpot outside of the patient parking lot.
Grissom became suddenly concerned as to what happened. He walked outside, not saying a word, trying to catch up with Catherine. He looked to the left and right but didn't see Catherine. Then he heard the sound of Catherine emptying her stomach into the flowerbed. He came up behind her and rubbed her back. She wiped her mouth and gave him a hug. She began to cry into his shoulder.
"It's OK." Grissom said in a reassuring tone.
Suddenly, Grissom felt her petite hands pushing him off of her. He looked at her confused. Not knowing why she pushed him away.
"It's OK? Is that your solution to everything?" Catherine screamed at Grissom. He flinched as the words found their way out of her throat.
"It's not OK! Nick is gone! He's not coming back! And we only have ourselves to blame!"
Grissom looked at her, not understanding what she was saying.
"Yeah, that's right Gil. It's our fault! We let him die! How many times did Nick let us down? Never! And we let him down this time. If anyone's to blame, it's us!" The tears began to form in her eyes as what she said finally began to sink in.
"Oh my God. It's our fault." She said reassuring herself more the Gil.
"Oh Grissom. What have we done?"
Grissom sat there in silence as he felt an unfamiliar liquid spill down his face. Tears? How is this possible? Gil Grissom never cried.
Catherine's body started to shake uncontrolablly. Grissom walked over to her and held her in his arms. Trying to take some of the pain she was going through.
Grissom and Catherine took a break out on the bench. Neither one said a word to the other, they just sat there enjoying the air and thinking about what they were gonna do next.
Ten minutes later Grissom and Catherine walked in and sat down on the chairs. Waiting. When they came in and sat down, the realized that Sara had taken her turn up at bat.
Sara walked down the hall to Nick's room. She slowly walked in trying not to wake him. Her hand grazed against the bottom post of the bed. Her fingers interlocked themselves together. She acted like a kid in an expensive store whom was told by her mother, "Look, but don't touch". She mosied her way over to the table where she found used Kleenex and coffee cups. She brought the bin over from the corner and started to pick up. Typical Sara. She's cleaning instead of spending what could be the last few minutes with her friend. She had held it together for the last 4 hours. Not a single tear had been shed for the last 240 minutes, so why start now? She sat in the chair that was placed next to Nick's bed. She grabbed his hand with hers but suddenly dropped it back onto the bed. It was ice cold and stiff. This was not Nick. Nick was always warm and soft and he was never as pale as he was at this moment.
"What is wrong with you Sidle? You've seen this before. Treat it like another case." She laughed as the words ran through her mind.
"Another case?" She said out loud to anyone who was listening. "You're not just another case, Nicky. Oh you were much more than that."