A/N Okay sorry for the huge delay and thanks for the great reviews, as a consolation here is a HUGELY long part full of lots of drama angst and all things dramatical! Lol so enjoy and don't forget to review! Or I will forget to post.
Ryan felt a chill run through him as he heard her voice again. He swallowed hard but his mouth felt like sandpaper, he looked from Emma to his daughter who was crying and wailing loudly. He tried to speak but his voice wasn't working. Emma was rocking Ellie gently and smiling, oblivious to her shrieks and wails. She was soothing her softly and smiling, her sleek blond hair falling over her eyes. His heart was pounding and blood was rushing in his ears, deafening him. He felt numb…how had she got in here? Where was Seth? He knew Summer had gone out but Seth should be here, where was he? He wouldn't have let her in…suddenly it felt like the bottom had dropped out of his stomach.
"W..what are you doing here?" He asked bluntly, steadying his voice. Emma looked up, still rocking Ellie in her arms and she smiled slightly at Ryan her brown eyes bloodshot and weary. She looked back down at the little girl who was still crying and pulling at Emma's jacket whilst reaching out for Ryan with her other hand. Ryan swallowed hard, he couldn't stand seeing his daughter like this and especially as he couldn't do anything about it…not yet anyway. Emma finally met his gaze for longer than a few seconds.
"What do you think Ryan? I came for my daughter, I came to see you both." She said softly smiling. Ryan felt sick as he looked at her holding his daughter, the daughter she had abandoned.
"What is wrong with you? What makes you think that you can just turn up here again and expect me to let you walk back into our lives after what you did?" He asked his anger rising as he clenched his fists tightly, he couldn't lose him temper, not whilst she was holding his daughter. He had to keep things under control. Emma continued to smile not taking Ryan's comment in.
"She's gotten so big, she's beautiful." She whispered breathlessly, ignoring him and not taking her eyes from her screaming daughter who was writhing and struggling in her arms.
"You're hurting her." Ryan said desperately watching as Ellie shrieked, Emma still gripping her tightly.He moved slowly forward and Emma drew back her eyes wide, pulling Ellie closer to her chest. Ryan swallowed hard his heart hammering.
"Emma please, just give me Ellie and we can talk okay? Just talk." He said softly looking her straight in the eyes, his gaze trained on her as he tried to keep it away from his daughter, his heart aching with each cry. Emma frowned, her jaw working as she looked from Ryan back to Ellie…
"Talk? Ryan, that's what I want. I just want to talk to you, about us about our daughter. Do you really think I would hurt her? I love her Ryan and I love you, I just want us to be a family again. For you to trust me." She said with tears welling in her eyes, Ryan forced back a scoff. She was already turned on the waterworks, he had learnt not to trust her tears a long time ago but for now he needed to keep her happy.
"Okay, just give me Ellie okay?" He said reaching out his arms and drawing slowly nearer. Emma looked down at Ellie who was still crying her face red as tears rolled down her cheeks, she gently handed her over to Ryan who took her in his arms hurriedly and pulled her towards his chest, hugging her and rocking her gently, sighing with relief. Emma watched awkwardly, wrapping her arms around herself insecurely as tears welled in her eyes.
"it's okay sweetie, it's okay. Daddy's got you." Ryan whispered gently as he rocked a now sniffling Ellie in his arms as she calmed down. He looked up from his daughter to Emma who was leaning against the wall trembling slightly as she looked around.
" Emma…" He ventured carefully as Ellie snuggled against his chest, Emma looked up meeting his gaze but hers was distant, something definitely wasn't right.
"How did you get in here?" He asked softly not wanting to set her off, he knew what her temper was like. She looked at him and smiled reaching into her pocket. She pulled out a small key and held it up so it caught the light.
"You never changed the locks, the place hasn't changed that much since…" She trailed off looking down at the floor. Ryan felt a flair of anger.
"Since you abandoned your daughter when she needed you? Since you left me to take care of her by myself, since you realised you were too drunk most of the time to be a real mother?" He spat angrily losing control of his temper, he couldn't hold it in. He hadn't seen or heard from her in nearly 2 years and she expects to just be able to waltz in and to be a mother again. It was too much…he couldn't let her do it.
Emma stared at him for a few seconds, closing her fists around the key in her hand, her whole hand shaking as she did so. A tear slipped from her eye and down her cheek and she met Ryan's intense icy glare.
"Ryan I, I'm sorry. I was messed up and confused, I didn't know what I was doing. I just want to be part of her life, I want to be her mom." She said her voice cracking with emotion. Ryan scoffed as Ellie rested her head on his shoulder.
"You can never be a mother, you had the chance but you walked out on her. She doesn't need you, she has me and Marissa." He blurted out as Ellie smiled at the mention of Marissa's name. Emma froze staring at Ryan.
"Marissa? You mean that B!tch who broke your heart? That supermodel…so you're back with her then? She's not her mother, I am. Nothing will change that." She retorted growing more angry by the second. Ryan lowered Ellie to the floor where she stood, clinging onto Ryan's leg tightly.
" Look I'm not even having this conversation with you Emma, you abandoned your daughter, left me with just a note, then break into my house 2 years later and expect me to welcome you back with open arms? You're not being a part of Ellie's life, If I have to take this to court then I will because seriously who do you think they will side with? Me or the alcoholic "mother" who walked out on her daughter when she was a baby?" He said sarcastically keeping his hand rested on Ellie's blonde head as she hugged his knee.
Emma swallowed hard clenching her fists harder so her nails were digging into her palms sharply, she clenched her teeth and drew a shaky breath. She wasn't leaving without her daughter, she didn't care what it took…She inched closer until she was standing in front of Ryan, forcing tears from her eyes. They rolled down her cheeks steadily as she looked down at her daughter who was sucking her thumb and hugging her father's leg. She was so beautiful. She sighed sadly before looking into Ryan's blazing blue eyes.
"Fine Ryan…I'll just…"
she was cut short by Seth appearing at the top of the stairs with a groan rubbing his head and looking around with confusion.
"Ryan? I…oh my god." He mumbled catching sight of Emma. As Ryan looked over to Seth Emma took her opportunity, she drew her knee up into Ryan's groin hitting him with as much force as she could muster, causing him to double over gasping in pain as she grabbed Ellie harshly and pulled her into her arms and sprinting from the room, Ellie screaming in her arms, Seth yelling and Ryan collapsed to his knees struggling to get to his feet as his eyes watered in pain. She ran towards the door blocking out the yelling and screaming and just concentrating on getting to the car, with Ellie…getting her daughter back…
Ryan gripped the couch tightly and pulled himself to his feet pushing the fiery pain to the back of his mind and sprinting through the pain as his eyes watered, the pain didn't matter…she had his daughter and he needed her back that was all that was important…Ellie.He had to get her back before Emma did something stupid.
Seth watched in amazement as Emma sprinted out of the door with a shrieking Ellie in her arms and as Ryan writhed in pain, he winced knowing how much that must hurt…Emma had taken Ellie…why was he just standing here? He had to help Ryan, pushing the throbbing pain in his head from his thoughts he ran down the stairs taking them two at a time before following Ryan out of the front door…his mind racing
Just in time to see Emma's car pull away…
Ryan felt his heart leap into his throat at the roar of a car engine filled his ears, he ran towards the car slamming his hands down on the bonnet angrily as Emma pulled out of the driveway sharply, Ellie strapped into the back in a booster seat…He watched them drive away and there was nothing he could do, blood rushing in his ears as his heart raced; pounding against his ribs furiously as he pulled out his car keys. He felt Seth draw up next to him and he said something that Ryan didn't process…all he was thinking about was his daughter who was steadily being taken further and further away from him as the seconds passed. He didn't have time to be standing here; he needed to get her back. He sprinted across the drive to where his car was parked his mind buzzing as he yanked the door open, Seth was shouting something that again he didn't hear but he was getting into the passenger seat. He couldn't lose Ellie, he couldn't lose her. He loved her more than anything in the world and he wasn't letting her go…
Seth watched as his brother turned his keys sharply in the ignition, he definitely shouldn't be driving but he wasn't listening to what he was saying…he wasn't not listening, he wasn't processing anything. He knew how much Ryan loved Ellie and he couldn't imagine how he must be feeling right now, he couldn't even process what was happening himself, but it wasn't safe for him to be driving right now.
"Ryan man, let me drive. We'll get her back but let me drive, it's not safe for you to be driving right now. What good are you going to be to Ellie if you're wrapped around a lamp post?" He asked looking Ryan straight in the eyes, he hated the despair and loss he saw reflected in them. He couldn't believe Emma had done this and he couldn't believe this was actually happening but the dull throbbing in his head was a constant reminder…Ryan sighed shakily tears welling in his eyes and he nodded before throwing his car door open and running round the other side of the car as Seth followed suit. Seth smiled weakly at his brother and slammed his foot on the accelerator as he reversed hastily from the drive, this was no time for his "granny driving" as Summer aptly named it. Ryan and his niece needed him.
Emma glanced down at her old mobile which was ringing incessantly from it's place on the dashboard, she could barely hear it over Ellie's shrieking and crying, god did she ever shut up? She thought angrily as she reached for the phone. She flicked it open, scratching at her itching nose…god she needed fix.
"Yeah?"
"Emma, please just pull over. It doesn't have to be like this. I said we could talk okay? I'm sorry I lost it but…look, please just pull over so we can talk. We can talk about you seeing Ellie…just don't do anything stupid. Do you really want to hurt her?" Ryan said softly but hurriedly as Seth caught up with her car as it sped along the freeway. He marvelled at how calm Ryan was considering his daughter was trapped in a car with her loony alcoholic mother who was switching lanes rapidly and driving at around 90.
Ryan waited in an agonising silence, he could hear Ellie crying again on the line and all he wanted was to have her in his arms. He couldn't stand this.
Emma felt tears slip down her cheeks, she did love him and she didn't want to hurt her daughter but he just didn't understand how hard it was for her. Wondering about how big Ellie was each day, if she remembered her…She didn't know how she got so caught up with alcohol and drugs but she just knew that she couldn't have her daughter growing up with that and that she deserved better. She had tried to give it all up but she just couldn't, she was weak and the drugs made her confident and happy…she needed them. She looked at her daughter in the rear view mirror and sighed, she wasn't letting her go…but she needed to let Ryan think she would.
"Okay." She whispered her voice choked with emotion as she swerved into the hard shoulder and pulled over.
Ryan let out a long sigh of relief as Emma pulled over, the car resting on the side of the road and the engine still running. He hung up the phone and glanced over at Seth who was pale and his head was bleeding slightly but he smiled slightly giving Ryan a nod as he pulled over behind Emma's car. Ryan swallowed hard, his hands shaking as he balled them into fists and shoved them into his pocket. He glanced at Seth briefly before walking along the side of the road, the bitterly cold wind whipping around him, causing him to shiver involuntarily. His breath rose out in silvery plumes in the night air as he reached the car in front of him. He walked to the passenger seat and pulled the door open his heart pounding. Emma was sitting back in the chair, tears rolling down her cheeks whilst Ellie sobbed softly in the back, sucking on her coat and whimpering. Ryan smiled at her softly and leant back into the backseat, planting a kiss on his daughter's forehead and letting her grab his finger before looking back to Emma who shifted her eyes across to meet his.
" I'm sorry Ryan." She whispered choking back a sob. Ryan sighed deeply as the wind ruffled his hair, his boots crunching on the snow as he shifted from foot to foot. He didn't know what to say to her, he just wanted his daughter to be okay.
"I know, I'm sorry I got mad but…it's like…I don't know. It's just weird having you around again and I guess it brings everything back." He mumbled, he didn't know where this was coming from but he needed to keep her calm. Emma let out a sob and folded her arms over the steering wheel, her whole frame shaking as she collapsed into desperate tears. Ryan stood there awkwardly before stepping into the car and sitting down, closing the door to keep out the cold. He knew he shouldn't be sitting in here with her but at least he was with Ellie. His thoughts racing he awkwardly reached out a shaking hand and placed it softly on her quivering back, not knowing what to do or say…She looked up, her eyes red and bloodshot.
"I just wanted to see her Ryan and I didn't think you would let me. I don't know why I just did but, I'm so used to running and…I got clean Ry, I went to rehab and everything just so I could be a good mom for her when I came back. I just want to be a good mom for her. I quit drinking and everything else because…I want to be her mom and I want you to trust me." She said between sobs.
Ryan's mouth felt like sandpaper as he tried to swallow…he looked down at his feet when something caught his eyes, he squinted through the darkness of the car when he saw what unmistakeably a bottle of vodka stashed under the driver seat. He felt a sudden surge of hot anger, she had been drinking and driving whilst his daughter was in the car? After all that about rehab and stopping drinking she had just fed him…what was wrong with her? He found himself shaking as he bit down hard on his lip, she had manipulating him the whole time, playing the innocent reformed alcoholic. As he reached out to the steering wheel he glanced at her arm where he sleeves had ridden up and he saw purpling bruises and scars…needle shaped scars. He knew what heroine user's arms looked like, he had grown up with having to find veins for his own mother! How could she seat there, looking him in the eyes and tell him she was clean? He felt the coppery taste of blood fill his mouth as he looked at her angrily. He actually thought that she had changed, he had actually believed her for a few seconds there…
"I can't believe you, you're sitting there spouting this crp with a bottle of vodka stashed under your chair! I can see the scars and marks on your arms Emma! Your "daughter" is in the car with you and you're drinking! I thought you had actually changed this time, I guess I've just gotten too soft since you've been gone, too trusting? Well if you think you're seeing Ellie now then you're more deranged than I thought you were. You're pathetic thinking that I'd actually let you see her after this…I'm taking Ellie and I'm going." He said reaching for the door when he heard the heavy clunk of the locks closing, he looked back to Emma who had her eyes fixed on the road, her expression blank and her eyes empty.
"Emma, what are you doing? Open the door" He yelled angrily but he couldn't help but feel a little scared…he had to stop her before she did anything stupid. She met his gaze and smiled slightly before slamming on the accelerator and swerving back into the road.
Seth tapped on the steering wheel impatiently, watching the car in front carefully. Ryan had been a while; he should go and check if he was okay. But there was no screaming so far so that was promising. He sighed, this was so messed up. Just as things were going great for Ryan something had to come along and ruin everything. He sighed impatiently and switched on the radio, smiling as an old Death Cab classic came on. He jumped slightly, startled as a loud car horn filled his ears and he turned his attention to Emma's car immediately, his mouth going dry as he watched numbly as the car swerved back onto the road…He fumbled with the steering wheel before pulling out after the car, he couldn't leave Ryan alone with her, he'd need to have his back like Ryan had all those times before.
Ryan fumbled with his seat belt desperately as Emma sped along the road, gripping the steering wheel tightly; her knuckles turning white. He swallowed hard his heart pumping as his fingers slipped over the catch, he looked up as Ellie started to scream again, Emma had her eyes fixed firmly ahead as tears tumbled down her cheeks, her body shaking as she changed lanes rapidly causing other cars to beep indignantly and brake harshly.
"Emma stop the car! What are you doing? You're going to get us killed! Stop.The.Car." He said looking straight at her as the tears flowed faster. She turned to him her eyes leaving the road but her hands still gripping the wheel.
" STOP" He shouted, blood rushing in his ears as Ellie screamed and Emma cried softly her foot pressed flat on the accelerator.
"I'm sorry Ryan." She whispered her eyes fixed on him, Ryan looked up and the glare of the red light ahead filled his eyes causing him to squint his hands again fumbling with the seat belt and he desperately tried to ram it into the buckle. The car sped on shooting past the red lights and across the junction. The lorry coming from the right had no opportunity to stop. It hit the car full force sending the station wagon rolling over across the road, metal scraping with a sickening crunch, sparks shooting into the night air, engines roaring and horns blaring. The last thing that went through Ryan's mind before the truck hit the car was that moment on the swings with Marissa and Ellie, the moment they had become a make-shift family. He felt his body being hurled upside down and crippling pain but his mind wasn't in the car, it was at the park on the swings. Holding hands with Marissa with Ellie on his lap…then the darkness came.
Seth drove desperately down the busy roads, looking out for any signs of Emma's beaten car. He chewed on his bottom lip nervously, his hands tapping the steering wheel impatiently. Where was all this traffic coming from? He sighed and peered out of the window, with all this traffic he would never find them. Then he remembered Ryan had left his phone and he could call Emma's mobile. He grabbed the phone that was resting on the passenger seat and flicked it open before scrolling through the recent calls list. When he reached Emma's mobile he pressed call and waited as the traffic slowly crawled forwards. The phone rang four or five times before going straight to voicemail. He hung up, his mouth dry and his hands trembling. Where the hell were they? Were they okay? He closed his eyes and rested his head against the head rest…he couldn't sit in the this traffic any longer. He indicated before pulling out of the lane and taking the long way around…
Seth could hear sirens and he could see flashing lights ahead and he felt his stomach drop, he felt sick as he gripped the steering wheel tighter. It was just a coincidence, he was being stupid. He rounded the corner and the lights got brighter as he saw police cars surrounding the scene. He leaned out the window and swallowed hard as he caught site of a wrecked station wagon, lying in a twisted heap on the road side, the side of a large truck pressed against it…the station wagon looked familiar…too familiar. His mouth felt like sandpaper as his hands started to shake. It was Emma's …
He swerved out of the lane hurriedly, parking the car on the side of the roads causing angry drivers to yell and beep loudly. He ignored them, his heart pounding and his blood rushing in his ears. He shut off the ignition and scrambled out of the car, stumbling as he slammed the door and dodged through the slow moving traffic his mind racing…He broke into a run, getting steadily nearer to the wreck his feet echoing the racing rhythm of his heart. He stopped in his tracks his eyes burning with tears as he heard cries from inside…it was Ellie crying.
He ran forward again but his path was blocked by a tall police man who stood in the way. Seth looked up in frustration at the burly man.
"I'm sorry sir but you can't come through here." He said in a deep gruff voice. Seth didn't have time for this, finding his voice he managed…
"That's my brother in there and my niece…" He cried his voice shaking, a large painful lump forming in his throat as he forced back tears. The policeman frowned before looking apologetic and letting him pass. He ran forward, his feet slipping on the icy road then crunching on shards of broken glass. His legs felt like lead as he urged himself to walk over, feeling like he was ready to pass out there and then. The car was on it's side, the metal twisted and dented, the window panes emptied of glass. On the other side the bulk of a truck was perched precariously, groaning and shifting with the weight. A disorientated, bloody trucker was talking to a police officer…Seth drew his gaze away from the greying truck driver and willed it back to the wreckage. On the passenger seat, nearest the cold road he could make out the crumpled form of his brother. His face was pressed against the side of the car, his face pale and still…a large gash stood out vividly against his pale features and his eyes were closed. One hand was wrapped around his chest tightly, the other hanging loosely at his side, his whole frame was limp and lifeless. His torso was blocked by a shard of metal and a twisted limp air bag, the brilliant white spattered with little red spots. Seth felt nausea wash over him as he struggled to take in the scene before him. His heart start to pound faster and harder against his ribs as he heard Ellie's screams from inside. He slowly dropped down to his knees his head spinning, he couldn't believe this was actually happening. He knelt in front of his brother's lifeless form and peered deeper into the wreckage of the car, he saw Emma's limp lifeless body spread halfway over the bonnet and half of it still in the car, no seat belt. Her face was pale and her eyes open and glazed…she was dead. Seth felt bile rise in his throat but he willed the nausea to stop, he needed to help his brother and his niece. He looked around the car, his hands resting on the twisted window frame. The ambulance would be there soon, he should wait for them…but that's when he heard the slow dripping of liquid, spattering against a hard surface…that's when he saw the petrol leaking from the teetering lorry above, and the smoke rising from the deformed bonnet of the car. He didn't have much time. His attention snapped from the petrol back to the car in front of him when he heard a feeble coughing and spluttering.
His heart skipped a beat as Ryan weakly coughed again, pain etched across his features. His brow knitted in obvious discomfort as his eyelids slowly fluttered open, closed again then finally opened. He looked around quickly in a panic and Seth felt relief wash over him…he was alive.
"Ry…Ryan, Ryan can you hear me? It's Seth." He said desperately his voice wavering, thick with emotion and surppressed tears as his brother blinked blearily, his gaze looking around frantically before finally resting on Seth.
With each feeble breath Ryan took it felt like knives were piercing through his chest, he could taste coppery blood in his mouth and his whole body was searing with white hot pain. His head ached as Seth's face swam before him, his head spinning. He felt numb with cold, each violent shiver sending pain shooting through him. Even through all this pain, all he could think about was Ellie.
"S…Seth…" He whispered weakly his eyes drooping shut again before he forced them open with difficulty, it was becoming harder and harder with each second passing to keep them open. This was it…he thought, this was how he was going to die.
Seth felt his heart breaking as he looked down at his desperate brother, he could see how much pain he was in and there was nothing he could do. He bent closer to his brother, trying to smile through the warm tears which were now coursing down his cheeks.
"It's okay man, I'm gonna get you out of here." He said taking his brother's cold, bruised hand and squeezing it. Ryan closed his eyes and swallowed ignoring the fiery pain coursing through him. He opened them again slowly his heart aching as he looked into his brother's face, he wouldn't let it end like this. He had to get his daughter out, Ellie was all that mattered.
"E…Ellie." He stammered shivering violently, he could hear sirens distantly drawing closer.
"Ellie's fine man…we'll get her out. It's okay, you're going to be fine." Seth said his voice breaking as another warm salty tear slid down his numb cheeks. He couldn't take this in, this wasn't supposed to happen…Ryan didn't deserve this…he would be fine, he told himself firmly. Ryan seemed to be struggling to get his words out, this was bad. Ryan needed help now.
"No…there isn't time…I can see the smoke just a…as well as you can. G…get her out Seth, sh…she's more important. Please…get her out." He pleaded tears forming in his eyes as he shivered again violently, growing dizzier by the second. Seth shook his head tears falling faster.
"Ryan…wh…what about you? I can't just leave you…" He whispered his heart hammering as he watched Ryan get weaker and weaker, and paler and paler…it was like he was deteriorating in front of him. Ryan swallowed hard, pain written across his pale face as his eyelids drooped lower.
"Yes you can. Seth, I don't matter…Ellie does, please…just do this for me. Get her out. Please just do this to me, I'll…I'll be okay." He said shakily as he blinked back tears. Seth wiped his eyes quickly as the tears fell faster. He couldn't believe he was doing this…He had to, he had to do this for his brother. He nodded solemnly and Ryan nodded back his head spinning, Seth gripped his hand tightly.
"I love you man." He said, Ryan felt tears burning in his eyes as his vision greyed slightly
"I love you too man and…and If I don't…If I…tell…tell Marissa that, tell her I will always love her." He said, just saying those words broke his heart, knowing that he might not be able to see her face again, hold her in his arms, kiss her and tell her that he loved her…
"It won't come to that." Seth said before giving with brother's hand a final squeeze and dodging around the other side of the wrecked car to the smashed window where Ellie was sitting in her booster seat balling, she looked unharmed apart from a small cut on her forehead. Seth pulled his sleeves down to avoid the broken glass, he was going to do this for his brother, and then he was going to get him out. He wasn't leaving him in here and he wasn't going to die. He tried the door once but it was jammed. He sighed before reaching in with both arms his mind buzzing and his heart aching as he heard Ryan coughing from the front seat. He carefully unbuckled the seatbelt holding Ellie in her seat with one arm and supported her with the other. She continued to cry loudly calling out for Ryan, Seth managed to pull her gently out his whole body shaking as he pulled her into his arms. A police officer who had been standing by offered to take her from Seth as the ambulances pulled up to the scene but Seth knew what he had to do…He held Ellie tightly to his chest trying to sooth her as he returned back to Ryan's side of the car, he knelt back down Ellie still in his arms as his heart began to hammer again. He looked into his brother's face but his eyes were closed…his face pale and still, blood dripping from his gash and his blue shirt was dark with blood…
"Ryan." He choked out Ellie still wailing and groping at Seth's shirt. Ryan didn't stir nor make a sound. He lay perfectly still…Seth held Ellie tightly, his arms shaking as he held her.
"Ryan?" He whispered his eyes burning and his throat aching as time stopped still…waiting for Ryan to say something…or just to move. The smoke billowing from the bonnet was choking Seth as the teetering lorry groaned dangerously again. Suddenly paramedics started rushing over and Seth was quickly moved aside with comforting, patronising words. There was a flurry of activity around him whilst he stood there dazed, everything going on around him whilst he just stood still…He still couldn't take the whole thing in, the fact that he might lose his brother tonight…he wasn't ready to let him go. Emma couldn't take him away from him. He rocked Ellie gently in his arms before he heard yells from the paramedics then his heart jumped into his throat…
Wow so that was a lot of drama for one post huh? Well I hope you enjoyed it because there is more to come, but only if you review your little hearts out...3, 2, 1 GO!
Next Time: Ryan is pulled from the car and things don't look good, Seth calls Summer who has to break the news to Marissa who is in Paris..