The poem is Dark Claws by Scarlet faerie.
In this chapter I'm going to flip from first person to second person POV, just to confuse and annoy y'all…well alright, when I was writing this I was kind of looking at it from both Graces and Chris's (and others maybe) POV. So that's how it's coming out. And it's going to be confusing, when I was reading it over I was really (which isn't hard I might add). A few sentences I had the first and second POV and that was really : S…
Part 4: Waking Nightmares; part 1.
The claws that captured my blackened heart
I can still feel those hands
It was one of Wyatt's favourite games to play; invite some demons to have some fun with me and he'd watch. The first time he had done that was a few years ago. That was before he had ever raped me himself. The first time it had been forced on me.
I was having a nightmare and I didn't realise it. The only difference was that I was the age I am now. Wyatt came over and removed the blindfold that he had put over my eyes. He sat down in a chair, straddling it, watching me through half lidded eyes. I had no idea what he was doing, or what he was waiting for. And yet a part of me knew exactly what was going to happen and it terrified me because I knew I couldn't get away. I stared up at the demons that grouped themselves around me. I struggled against them. Hands gripped my arms, ensuring that I wouldn't be able to fight them off. Not that it would have mattered; they were much stronger than I was. The first demon moved in front of me. Claws dug into my hips, as he thrust painfully into me. I cried out. And then another demon moved behind me, ramming into me from behind. I shrieked in pain. Screaming at the agony that they were causing me.
((Second person POV))
The door to the room banged open and Piper hurried in. She froze at the sight that greeted her. Graces body was covered in a sheen of sweat, she jerked and writhed fitfully, the sheets tangled around her. Piper moved towards the bed, but she stopped again at the words that came from the sleeping figure.
"Help me! Wyatt! Don't let them do this to me!" She screamed. Then Chris arrived, not seeming to even see Piper as he ran to the bed and grabbed Graces hands that were outstretched in a gesture of supplication.
"Wake up." He said loudly. She continued twisting and jerking.
"Grace. Wake up, Grace. You're having a nightmare." My eyes finally snapped open and she jerked her hands back. I smacked him hard in the face. He didn't seem to notice. I skittered backwards across the bed from him, my eyes wide and terrified. He glanced back at Piper.
"Go back to bed. I've got it."
"Are you sure?" She asked.
"Just go!" He snapped. He didn't have time to worry about being polite right now. He caught one of Graces hands again, the other going to the side of her face.
"Let me go!" I screamed at him.
"You had a nightmare again. It's alright, it's over now." He said. She shook her head frantically.
"N…no. The demons and W…Wyatt…they were right here. I saw them." I whispered. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly. I shuddered against him and took a shaky breath.
"I can still feel their hands. Touching…all over me. Couldn't…couldn't get away. Hate…hate…" I trailed off.
"You hate him, I know." He finished. I shook my head. How can you make someone understand how you feel inside when they've never had the same experience?
"N…no, hate myself." I whispered. He looked down at me in shock and I closed my eyes not wanting to see his face.
He sat with me for a long time and after I had managed to calm down a little he stood up to leave. I held onto him tightly.
"Don't leave me." I begged him.
"Sleep with me tonight. Please?
"Grace, I can't." He whispered.
"Please, Chris. You don't understand. It's been so long since I got sleep that you or someone else didn't force on me." I said.
"Grace…" He trailed off. I wouldn't let him go.
"Just tonight. I can't…I'm afraid of sleeping. I'm afraid of sleeping and having those nightmares again. When you're here it's not so bad." There I'd finally said it.
He looked undecided; he knew it was something that he shouldn't be doing, especially not the way he was feeling about her.
"Okay," he said finally.
"But just for tonight." He slid under the covers. He wished he had decided to wear something other than a t-shirt and boxers for sleeping in.
I curled against him; I laid my head on his chest. After a moment I felt his arm slide across my shoulder as he hugged me close.
Chris stared down at her. He knew she was still afraid, he could feel her body trembling against him. He had thought she was asleep when he heard her take a deep breath and knew I was trying to tell him something.
They left me with that tearing lie
Sinking into my anguish
"He'd just watch sometimes. He had this disgusting smile on his face. I can remember once askin him why he did that and he said he enjoyed it, he enjoyed watching me struggle and knowing that I couldn't stop them, that they were just going to do it anyway and I was just the receptacle. What does that mean?" I looked up at him. It took him a moment that she was waiting for him to answer and he didn't want to, but he also knew that she'd keep pressing him until he told her.
"A receptacle is something that holds things." It was the best way he could think of describing it. He could feel me nodding against his chest.
"Then sometimes, he'd do other stuff first. Like just before I got here, he was whipping me, but every time the whip hit me he'd send a charge through it. I don't think he really wanted to know where they were, he just enjoyed causing me pain. He wouldn't just use the whip on me, he'd burn me. He had this kind of a metal rod that he'd tie my arms to so that it was pressed against my back and then he'd heat it up." I said. He nodded imperceptibly; he had seen the burn mark that had been on her arms and across her shoulders, now he knew how it had gotten there.
"He wouldn't let me have food for days and then he'd complain that I was really thin. I told him once that was his fault cos he wouldn't feed me. And so he decided to punish me." I took a deep shuddering breath.
"And that's when he just left me there, for hours, days…with this thing stuck in my…stuck in me! I couldn't get it out! No matter what I did or which way I turned it hurt even more." I paused again. It disgusted him, he knew Wyatt was capable of such things, he had heard the stories. But to do this to his own sister! He didn't want to hear this. But she wanted to talk about it and if he didn't listen then the chances were that she wouldn't tell anyone, she'd just bottle it all up inside. He didn't have any advice he could offer, all he could do was be here for her and maybe that was all she wanted.
"He kept telling me that all I had to do was join evil. Join him and it would all end. All I had to do was say that I would change over and he'd stop them and that he wouldn't hurt me anymore." I stopped speaking again and took a deep breath, opened my mouth to start again and then shut it. I closed my eyes tightly and then looked up at him, he stared down at me and his eyes were filled with compassion.
"Want to know the worst thing? I wanted to so badly. I wanted it to stop. If that meant turning evil then I would have done that. I just wanted them to go away and leave me alone. I was so scared, Chris, so scared. I don't know what made me, but I didn't. I don't know why and I keep thinking that maybe I should have, because then it wouldn't have kept going on. But if I had then…" I stopped again.
"You had already given him everything else. Joining him would have been like giving up the last part of yourself. And even if you did that then there was no real guarantee that he would stop." He hugged me tightly.
"He was trying to break you."
"I think he did." I whispered.
"No, he didn't. He tried and failed. He tried the same thing with me." He said. I pushed myself up on his chest and looked him in the eye.
"He did the same thing to you?" I asked. He shook his head and looked a little abashed.
"Not the same thing. I mean he tried to get me to join him. You're stronger than you know, Gracie. Because if he'd done the same sort of things to me that he did to you then I might have turned to evil." He said. Thank god he didn't, he thought. Every word he spoke was true.
"No, I'm not. I stopped fighting against him not long after he got me the first time. How is that being strong?" I asked.
"When you struggled against him did he do what he wanted anyway?" He asked.
"Yeah, and it was worse, more painful. But I don't understand how that would have made a difference." I replied.
"There's your answer. He was going to do it anyway, so what was the point in fighting it?" He asked. I shrugged; I didn't have an answer to that.
"I still hated it. Not just because of the pain, but because…y'know?" I said.
"Go to sleep. I'll be right here when you wake up." He said. I snuggled closer to him, feeling safe and protected and loved.
Sinking into my anguish
Now every night I hide