Z Star: Hey! I just wanna say thanks to all the people who reviewed and who didn't flame me:) Oh and Street Pizza! I'll let you know when I use Peng Yuan Ok? So this is the first OC I'm going to show you people! And here it is…
The Monkey Boy
A guy with a tail and pure of heart…
"In the next room!" Cao Cao questioned. "Why are they in the next room! You said there was another recruit, I thought you meant there was ONE of them left! You said there was ANOTHER candidate, and candidate stand for ONE person!"
"Did I say that?" The soldier grinned sheepishly, tightening the grip on his spear. "I'm sorry but I don't think I did Lord Cao Cao…"
"Oh really! REALLY? REALLY! Hm… oh I see now! YOU ARE TOO THICK TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ONE PERSON AND A COUPLE OF PEOPLE! IS THAT IT? IS THAT YOUR PROBLEM? IS THAT WHY YOU ARE SO-"
"Father take deep breaths!" Cao Pi advised when Cao Cao started looking like a red balloon.
"Remember what the Doctor said about your blood pressure!" Xiahou Dun warned.
"Breath in! Breath out! Breath in! Breath out!" Xiahou Yun instructed and the Wei leader followed them.
"'Sigh' Ok I feel better now…" Cao Cao said taking his seat again.
"Umm… Mr…" Yue Ying asked the young shoulder.
"L-L-L-Ling." The young man stuttered.
"Mr. Ling. Maybe you should go and take your break now. Thank you for today." Yue Ying said escorting Ling out of the main hall. When she came back she gave the Hero of Chaos a tongue lashing.
"Now was that really neccesary? You almost made that man cry!" Yue Ying said putting her hands on her hips.
"Wow, that's the 5th victim this week!" Ling Tong snickered.
But everyone was silenced by the knock of a door. The first one to be interviewed was ready.
"Come in!" Sun Jian said.
"I wonder what this one will be like!" Xiao Qiao whispered to her sister.
"Probably another boring foot soldier Xiao." Da Qiao airly muttered.
"Where is he? Hello? Anyone?" No one saw the new recruit come in, eyes searched for a new person residing in the room.
"Down here!" A small voice called. Sun Jian put his hands on the table and leaned over. Everyone followed his actions and their expressions were priceless. They're faces were like this OoO.
There was a small boy. He had messy black hair and coal black eyes. He was wearing a red gi and a pouch. He also carried a long pole. He must have been at least 4 feet tall, though he seemed a little pudgy.
"Hi!" He grinned. Everyone blinked at least once or twice. Was this child really ready for war? Did he even know the consequences? He couldn't have been more then nine or ten years old. Liu Bei was the first to speak.
"Umm… what's your name young man?" He asked in a friendly way.
"Xue Ping." The boy said.
"Right… and how old are you?" Liu Bei questioned.
"I'm fourteen."
"Fourteen…Fourteen!" Liu Bei gasped.
"Now they're really isn't a need to lie about your age Xue Ping." Sun Jian began on another lecutre before Xue Ping interuppted.
"Oh no sir, I wouldn't lie. I am fourteen. I just have a case of dwarfism. It runs in my family…."
"What's dwarfism?" Cao Cao asked, cocking an eye brow.
"Oh, it's when you becoma a shorter size then an average person is. It happened to me during puberty and since then I've been like this."
"Is it a disease!" Yuan Shao asked, getting out his sword to swipe away the monkey boy.
"Oh no, it's just a genetic malfunction. It's not contageuous." Xue Ping explained.
"Phew! Well that's a relief!" The golden man sighed, taking his seat again. Everyone glared at the man with such fierce venom seeping through, shaking their heads. "What? I don't want to die of sickness like Sun Ce."
"W-WHAT!" Sun Ce gasped.
"Just kidding Little Conqeuror. Don't worry a healthy young man like you will not die of an illness." Yuan Shao smiled. But that still didn't stop Sun Ce from sweating a river.
"Ahem! Ignore the country's idiot Xue Ping." Cao Cao suggested earning a hateful glance. "So here's your first question. Why do you want to join the army?"
Xue Ping blinked twice. He took a moment to think before he answered.
"Well Mr. Cao Cao, it's because I like to fight!" He grinned. "I've been doing since I was three and I like fighting! And I want to see new places!"
Everyone blinked once. Then twice.
"Really?" Da Qiao asked.
"Yes Lady Da Qiao."
"You're not seeking revenge on any one! You're not-not trying to make up for a tragic past?" Ling Tong asked.
"Nope." Xue Ping answered plainly. Everyone was silent.
"I GET DIBS ON THE BOY!" Everyone screamed.
"What! That's not fair Liu Bei, you already have a normal officer!" Sun Jian pouted.
"Um, gentlemen? Before you start fighting over the guy, we shouldn't we go on with the interview?" Zhu Rong asked. Everyone mumbled something darkly and sat back down for the hundrenth time today. "Ok Xue Ping. Who taught you how to fight?"
"My Grandpa. He was a marshal arts teacher before he retired." Xue Ping said.
"Who raised you Xue Ping?" Sun Quan asked.
"My Grandpa and my cousin. Grandpa is always nice to me but my cousin… she's kind of a spoiled brat if you know what I mean."
"Oh we all have an idea what you mean." Da Qiao said looking at Xiao Qiao.
"What? Why is everyone looking at me?" Xiao Qiao asked.
"Ok here's another question." Zhou Yu said before anyone could say anything to his wife. "Do you have any strange qualitys, like having blue hair or red eyes?"
"Hmm… Well, I do have this tail…" Xue Ping showed his back to the audience to reveal a red, long tail that resembled a monkey's. He even wiggled it about, scaring the others. This O.O was the look on their faces.
"O-o-oh my heavens!" Zhang Jiao gasped, before fainting.
"Is that real!" Zhao Yun asked, getting up and started tugging on Xue Ping's tail.
"OW! OW! Stop that hurts!" Xue Ping cried. Zhao Yun gently put him down and ran back to his seat.
"It's real all right." Zhou Yun said. Everyone in the room paled.
"Of course it's real! My Father had one, and his father and then his and etc!" Xue Ping said, rubbing his sore behind. "Why are you acting so weird? Doesn't everyone have a tail?"
Everyone shook their head.
"Wouldn't you have noticed by now that no one else has a tail?" Lu Xun asked.
"Well… no." Xue Ping answered. "I've lived up in the mountins for most of my life. Infact I don't even know why you guys are fighting."
Everyone fell off their in anime style! Except for Cao Cao, Liu Bei and Sun Jian. They just stared with their mouths open and their eyes as big as plates.
"Do you even know anything about the three kingdoms?" Liu Bei asked.
"Yeah, of course! Why would I be at this interview if I didn't? My Grandpa told me stories about you guys…" Xue Ping giggled.
"O-o-o-ok." Sun Jian said. "Ahem, someone ask the next question, PLEASE!"
"Here's your next question Xue." Sun Ce said. "What kind of weapon do you use?"
"This!" Xue Ping held out a long pole that was saddled on his back. All the great warriors stared at the strange weapon.
"That's it? It doesn't have a blade, does it have magical powers?" Pang Tong asked.
"No. But it can do some cool things! Watch!" Xue Ping grasped the pole and stared at Dong Zhou. He ran up to him and jumped at the fat man and whack! He hit Dong Zhou right on the head. The fat king fell backwards and fainted. Everyone slient yet again.
"Well… Dong Zhou is a weak target… but we'll give you the extra points anyway!" Zhuge Liang smiled, and everyone else agreed.
"Ok here's another question. What is the story line that the author who made you up gave to you?" Zhou Tai asked.
"Well, I'm just a guy who travels a lot, and meets the guys from the three kingdoms. But theres one problem… everywhere I go, one way or another I always get everybody else into trouble. With hilarious results!" Xue Ping grinned. "It's due to my clumsiness and stupidity really."
"I'm sure you're not stupid. You seem like a bright young man." Diao Chan assured him. Xue Ping's cheeks darkened.
"Well… I have to disagree Madame." Xue Ping replied timidly.
"All right. Here's your final question. Which kingdom would you prefer to fight for? Hint Shu!" Liu Bei coughed the last sentence under his breath.
"Don't try and influence his decision Liu Bei!" Cao Cao growled. "Besides I'd think he'd be right at home in Wei."
"Oh sure, a nice boy like him. All he needs is to be manipulated into an evil villian, like you Cao Cao." Sun Jian commented.
"Now you listen to me!" Cao Cao spat, but before another fight could ensue, Zuo Ci butted in.
"Ahem! Do not worry about that question Xue Ping. We will decide which Kingdom would best suit you. Until then, you can stay in the castle." Zuo Ci smiled.
"Thank you sir!" Xue Ping bowed to the generals.
"WAIT! There is one more thing! Ladies? Do you feel the need to love Xue Ping or possibly marry him?" Huang Gai asked. The girls examined Xue Ping with their eyes, some of them holding their chins and tilting their heads a little.
"Hmm… he's cute a puppy dog way, but I would never ask him out." Diao Chan answered.
"He seems more like a guy who you can just be friends with." Da Qiao commented.
"Not my type. Even if I wasn't married." Zhu rong said, crossing her arms.
"What's married?" Xue Ping asked. No one asnwered him.
"He's nice, but a little short for me." Sun Shang Xiang said, scratching her neck. All the other girls nodded in agreement. "Sorry Xue Ping."
"That's Ok! I don't find you guys attractive anyway! I didn't find out what a girl was until I met my cousin last year!" Xue Ping said, putting his hands behind his head.
"WHAT!" All the girls glared at the little man, backing him into a corner.
"Now we know why he said he was stupid." Lu Xun said quietly to himself.
"N-n-n-not that you aren't all pretty! You're just not my type! And I need someone closer to my age! And height!" Xue Ping said quickly.
"Oh! Why thank you!" All the girls smiled, going back to their seats. Xue Ping sighed with relief and wiped his forehead. Thank God I'm not a Gary Sue! They would be on me like dogs.
"Ok Xue Ping. That's all for now. We'll call ya back if you a get a job." Zhao Yun said. "Oh and please find a way to hide that tail. It really creeps me out!"
"No promises sir Zhao Yun!"
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH XUEEEEEEEE PIIIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGG!" A loud, sqeuky voice came. Large, thumping footsteps came spreading fear down all the male generals spine's.
"Is that what I think it is?" Gan Ning said.
"Oh no!" Lu Xun said, ducking under his table.
"Oh no…" Xue Ping mumbled slapping his forehead.
"Who is that?" Jiang Wei asked.
"Oh cousin Xue Ping…" A girl with long auburn hair and blue eyes stepped into the room. She was quite pretty, but had a mischevious glint in her eyes. "Oh! I didn't realise that there was a room of strapping young men!" She sqealed in a high pitch voice, that sounded like someone scratching a black bord.
"RUN MEN! RUN! MARY SUE ALERT!" And all the bishies scattered, even the other men didn't want to take a risk of attracting the poisonus viper.
"Fu Ping! Stop scaring my new bosses! Go back to your room!" Xue Ping yelled, his hair standing on end.
"All right! No need to go into monkey mode peewee!" Fu ping snapped. She turned heel and winked at the male generals. "I'll be back boys!" She blew a kiss and left.
"I am so sorry about her!" Xue Ping apologised, bowing a bit. "My Grandpa told her to be on her best behaviour, I'll make sure she doesn't come within a mile of you next time."
"We'll hold you to that." Everyone grunted. They all came back from under the tables and dusted themselves off. It was another lucky escape for the three kingdoms…
To be continued…
Z Star: Sorry I took awhile updating, but I hope the long wait was worth it. Till the next chapter! Oh and I wrote some extra information on Xue Ping. Hope you like that too.
BIO:
XUE PING
Inspiration: This little guy was inspired by Goku in the Dragon Ball series (Don't own it) I got the manga one day and Xue Ping appeared in my head.
Name Meaning: Xue "Snow or studious" Ping "Peaceful".
Age: 14
Birth Place: Mt. Fuji (Made up)
Weapon: A long pole that does incredible tricks.
Family: Grandfather 'Xue Ting' and cousin 'Fu Ping'
Personality: Sweet and pure of heart, but a little slow and has a short temper for his cousin. He's basically happy go lucky.
Appearance: Hair: Black and wild. Eyes: Coal Black Skin: Fairly pale. Clothes: A red gi tied with a blue ribbin around the waist and black boots. Height: 4 feet Weight: A little chubby, but not fat. Extras: Has a monkey tail for some strange reason, that's even unknown to me.
Story line: He leaves his small home in the mountins and goes around exploring the three kingdoms causing trouble for the others. Along with his cousin, who has a devious plan.