"Alex those little trains remind me of the caterpillars that I sometimes look at when I'm bored, like a couple days ago when Marzipan broke up with me and so I went for a walk over to the stick and there was this caterpillar crawling up the side of it so I watched it for a while until Strong Bad came with a magnifying glass and was trying to burn it but I said that was mean and saved the little guy by taking him over to Marzipan's and letting him go in the garden. Do you like trains?"
Alex shifted in her seat. "No, Homestar. I don't really li-"
"Oh, because there was another time that I was trying to draw a train and it turned out really cool but then Marzipan got mad at me because she said I drew it on her pledge form, whatever that means, so she kicked me out of the living room and I went home to play space invisitors which is the game I was playing the day I first came to the real world right before I lost where Marzipan was and wandered into a weird crack that took me into an office building where I met Mike and Matt and a nice guy named Frank but I also met this evil lady named Laura who tried to kidnap me so I ran away and got attacked by a garbage monster but luckily Matt came and zapped it with a magic wand and they got me home just fine but Strong Bad took my hundred bucks."
"Oh look, Homestar… the seat belt light." Alex interrupted.
"Oh my gosh where?" Homestar stood up and hit his head on the overhead luggage compartment. "Owww…"
"It means you need to sit down and put on your seatbelt, not explode out of your seat and whack your head." Alex explained, tugging him back into the seat.
"Are we gonna fly now?" Homestar inquired excitedly.
"Yep. Keep watching out the window." Alex had discovered that as long as Homestar had something interesting to look at, his mouth tended to slow down to a tolerable rate of yapping. Then she got an idea. "Hey, you want some gum?"
"Okay! What kind is it? Mint or pink or stripey… I hope it isn't that gross kind that Stro-"
"Just try it and find out." Alex gave a stick of gum to him and he eagerly shoved it in his mouth. Blissful silence resulted, at least until the plane began to move.
Homestar sank back in his seat as the turbines whined to life. The plane lurched forward and taxied to the runway.
"Why did we stop here?" Homestar asked. The plane had slowed to a crawl, waiting for the all clear for takeoff.
"They're waiting for that plane to land I think." Alex replied, pointing at an incoming passenger jet just setting down on the runway.
Sure enough their plane lurched forward again a minute later. The engines roared as the plane gathered speed, pressing the passengers into their seats. Homestar grabbed hold of the arm rests when the landing gear retracted with a thud. The retreating ground began to fill the window as the plane made a tight U-turn above the airport. Alex leaned forward to get a better look out the window past Homestar.
"I don't like planes." Homestar stated firmly. He appeared paler than usual.
"I thought you were all excited to take off." Alex said.
The plane leveled out and Homestar relaxed his grip on the arm rests. He stared out the window in silence, hardly moving. The silence didn't last very long, though.
"All those little squares down there remind me of a quilt. I used to have a quilt once, but The Cheat used it as a parachute for Strong Bad's sailboat and it got all wet and moldy and smelled real bad, so I threw it away. Wow, are those lakes? Hey look, a river… it looks like some kinda freaky lightning bolt from way up here. Hey Alex, this plane is making me dizzy."
"You should probably sit back then." Alex suggested. "Try reading a magazine instead of staring out the window."
Homestar grabbed a magazine and opened it to the middle, accidentally tearing a few pages along the way. He held it up at different angles, inspecting a foldout airline ad. Then he started rummaging through the contents of the mesh pocket on the seat in front of him.
Alex started playing Tetris on an electronic keychain that was clipped to her purse. She managed to tune out the frantic ruffling of paper coming from beside her and focused on beating her previous high score. The numbers climbed steadily in the left hand corner of the tiny LCD screen as she neared her record. Suddenly the little game beeped, and the screen went blank.
"Oh, it just figures." Alex spat, flinging the little game into her purse angrily. She glanced over at Homestar. He was curled up on the seat with his knees folded to his chest, staring at the floor with glazed eyes.
"What's wrong?" Alex asked.
"I still don't feel good." Homestar replied.
"Well, there's a bathroom right back there if you-"
Homestar pushed past her before she could finish and dashed for the bathroom. He returned a few minutes later, his face a slightly greener shade of pale. He took his seat again and immediately dozed off.
"Is he with you?"
Alex looked up and saw a flight attendant standing beside her with a cart full of drinks. Her gold nametag was etched with the name "Barbara."
"Poor guy. Not everyone takes to planes so well." Barbara remarked. "You want some water or something?"
"Nah, I'm good. I don't suppose you have any Tylenol?" Alex inquired hopefully.
"I'm a flight attendant, not a pharmacist hon. I don't think that helps with airsickness anyway." Barbara said, pouring out some glasses of water for the passengers a row behind them.
"It isn't for him. It's for me." Alex replied flatly.