Lying on her bed Hermione Granger wondered for what seemed to be at least the hundredth time that hour what had gone wrong. Hours before she had been so excited to have Harry, Ron, and Ginny over for dinner at her new flat. She had looked for months for the perfect place near the ministry and her boys. Her boys, she had always thought of them that way even after Hogwarts, they just both meant so much to her that there wasn't any other way to describe them. She had spent the last nine years looking after them, keeping them out of as much trouble as she could, not that she was always successful though. They had been through so much together she couldn't believe that he would actually throw her away like that. He. She scolded herself, why had her mind moved from them to focusing just on him? It seemed that it always came to that anymore. The more she tried to ignore it the more he invaded her mind. She had known for years that their friendship went much deeper than the one she shared with her other best friend. One was a brother and one had the potential to be so much more.

No, she thought, not anymore. She just needed to forget all those feelings no matter how hard it would be. He had made it clear how he really felt tonight. How had she ever been so stupid to believe that there might be something there? Had she been reading the signs wrong for the last few years? Ginny had assured her that he felt the same way, she had assured her that he would come around, that he was just scared and didn't want to ruin their friendship- well it was all lies, she knew that now. At least Hermione knew Ginny had not lied to her, she wanted to see Hermione and her brother together almost as much as Hermione did. Well, they both had been wrong. The tears were coming freely now and she no longer tried to stop them. She had been fighting them too long and tonight was the night she finally put away her feelings for Ron Weasley.

She wished it was as easy as that. She knew there was no way she could throw away nine years of friendship; there was no way that she could cut him out of her life. It would almost be like asking her what she would rather live without her left arm or her right leg. Instead she would be forced to move on without him or watch him move on without her. This realization made her tears strengthen. He was the only boy that could ever make her cry, first year, second year, third year- well, she mused, there really wasn't a year that he hasn't made me cry for one reason or other. Why did she give him that power over her? Easy, she was hopelessly in love with Ronald Weasley, the prat.

The knock on her bedroom door disturbed her longed for solitude. Why couldn't Ginny just leave her alone? She didn't want to see anyone right now as un-Hermione-like it seemed she just wanted to cry over her broken dreams and tomorrow she would be able to pretend that it hadn't bothered her.

The knocking continued. Really, she thought, Ginny is being relentless tonight. Go away! Her mind screamed but she knew that it was useless; Ginny was nothing if she wasn't persistent and she wasn't leaving until she knew without a shadow of a doubt that Hermione was alright. Hermione let her mind wander to her guests downstairs- were they still there? How was Ginny explaining her prolonged absence or had she just sent the boys home? If she had they were probably wondering what had happened. They really were both that thick.

The knocking became more insistent and she knew that she had to answer or the headache she already had would just intensify. Finally mustering all that she had in her and praying that the tears would not show through her voice she called out,

"Go away Ginny."

The response wasn't what she expected. She had expected to hear Ginny demanding entrance, instead she heard a decidedly masculine, hesitant voice answer, "It's me Hermione, can I please come in?"

It would be him. He had always taken care of her at times like this. Hermione's mind briefly flickered back to the time in sixth year when he had sought her out to comfort her. But did she want him in there right now? Yes, she told herself, she really did. Again doing her best to hide the tears in her voice and furiously wiping them off of her face she answered,

"Come in Harry."

Her door opened to reveal her other best friend. The boy that had befriended her nine years ago and had rarely left her side. He still looked like the eleven-year-old boy that had intrigued her all those years ago. The twenty-year-old man still had the same messy black hair and the same self-conscious expression. The events of the last few years had done little to change him and for that she was grateful. Of course he had become surer of himself, taking steps with Ginny that Hermione had only wished Ron had taken with her. She and Ron had been so close to those same steps so many times only to be deterred by either their own stubbornness, pride, or fear. Recalling the memories only made her tears appear again and she turned over not wanting Harry to see them.

"Hermione," he whispered softly, "please don't cry. Come on you know I am utterly rubbish dealing with crying women."

She felt his weight on the bed next to her and she desperately wanted to laugh at the statement but she couldn't. Laughter just seemed to far away now. Choking back a sob she could only mutter, "Sorry."

"Sorry? Sorry for what? You, Hermione, have nothing to be sorry about." He said moving closer to her and placing a hand tentatively on her shoulder. Unable to control herself any longer, Hermione flung herself into his arms letting the tears fall freely.

Harry held her, whispering calming things into her ear as she tried to regain her composure. When had Harry become this- this what? Then the truth hit her- Harry Potter had grown up. It was strange to Hermione to think about this. When had it happened? How had she missed it? She had rarely been away from him for more than two days at a time. She had stood by his side for nine years, had fought with him for nine years, had nagged, placated, laughed with, and looked out for him for nine years- so how had she missed this? It made her a little sad, the older he got the less he would need her about but at the same time she felt awed that the boy she had met many years ago had turned into such a wonderfully giving man.

She began to control her tears and pulled away from Harry. She looked up at him and saw the concern in his eyes. She was about to apologize for crying all over his shirt when he cut her off-

"Do you want me to kill him for you?"

"What?" she responded, confused at what he meant.

"Do you want me to kill him?" he repeated, as if she hadn't heard the question before. Suddenly it all became clear to her,

"Harry," she stuttered "he is your best friend."

"Best friend or no best friend I will kill him if you want me to. Just say the words Hermione and Ron will be paying for what he said down there."

Hermione's heart swelled with pride and love and she had to bite back a slight grin, "No Harry, I don't want you to kill him. If you did that you would be carted off to Azkaban, Ron would be dead and I think that Ginny would probably stop speaking to me, being the underlying cause of her brother's death and boyfriend's imprisonment."

Harry simply shrugged, "Well okay then no death- can I hurt him maybe just a little?" At his look of eagerness she giggled a little.

"No Harry, really I will be fine. It's just that I really thought…" she paused feeling the tears well up again, "I really thought that this time something might actually happen, that we would finally…" she couldn't say anything else. Harry would understand, he had seen them over the years and Hermione was sure that he knew what she and Ron had been dancing around.

"I know," he said taking her hand, "and it is okay to cry, really. I know how much you want this to happen. Hell, you two have only been doing this since our fourth year but why is this time so different? It's just a row Hermione caused by one of Ron's stupid comments. You have been here before and you always seem to bounce right back."

"Harry," she cut him off before he could go any further, "that is the problem. I don't want to do this anymore. I am tired of waiting. I am tired of playing these games. After our sixth year I was so sure that we were moving in the right direction, I mean, yeah there were challenges ahead but I knew that as long as I was with him we would make it through them together. We had made it through so much already and I finally knew why I felt so strongly about him. So I waited knowing it would happen, believing it would happen soon. When nothing happened that summer I just told myself that it was because of the war and our search. I was so nervous about what would happen to the two of us, so I let it be. We were all so worried and there was so much to do I knew that realistically there wouldn't be time for us. So I just kept going. Then the war was over and we had overcome all odds, I told myself this time it will happen, than came the news of the deaths. So many Harry, so many that we had loved and cared for were gone. I knew that it wouldn't seem right to Ron that we finally move ahead while there was so much grief in his own family. But eventually that passed. Now he is in Auror training, I am so proud of him Harry, but I feel that it puts us off just that much longer. I am tired of waiting Harry. I am tired of never knowing what he wants to do. I can't keep waiting for him much longer." She paused to look at Harry knowing that he had heard this all before and yet feeling that it was necessary to make him see why she had to forgot Ron Weasley she continued "Then tonight Harry, I was so excited, I was doing what I could to make a relationship possible, I wanted to show him that I wasn't scared anymore, that it was finally the right time for us. And what does he do? He has to show me that he never really cared about me to begin with."

Hermione knew that the tears were not far away as she waited for Harry to say anything, anything at all. She desperately wanted him to reassure her that everything would be alright to, reaffirm that Ron was still cared for her and that soon he would realize that he was acting like a great oaf and would apologize for his comments earlier that evening and that it would all go back to the way it was supposed to be. Instead he just put his arm around her shoulders pulling her against him, she was shocked but leaned into him and for the first time in her life she understood the comfort of a brother's embrace.