Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not Danny Phantom, Invader Zim, Fairly Oddparents, Jimmy Neutron, My Life as a Teenage Robot, or anything I make a reference to in this story. I own only the clothes on my ba—wait, I don't even own the clothes on my back! All I own is Billy-Bob-Joe-Steve-Willy-Bo-Billy-Ishkiddlyniddly-Larry-Steve-John-Jacob-Jingleheimer-Schmidt-Harry-Jared Thompson (who prefers to go by Bob), Kav, and a Rurouni Kenshin Season One Box Set (which I watch entirely too much, that I do. I'm picking up Kenshin's speech patterns, that I am).
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The briefing room at RealTV"Okay," aETV rep said to the assembled 'toons. "I have assembled you all here today to tell you that in approximately five seconds you will instantly be teleported to RealiTV 8, where all reality TV shows take place, and all will be explained there. Toodles!"
There was unanimous screaming to be had.
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RealiTV 8, refusees"But Mom! Bigfoot REALLY broke into the garage to borrow the lawnmower!" the stupid plagiarizing girl muttered in her sleep. It was an easy matter to knock her out and send her to the reality TV planet. "Oh…oh. It was only a dream." She then sat up. "Where am I?" she asked.
"Are you the one who sent us here, with no pizza or batteries? If you are, you will pay…" somebody growled to the new arrival. Wait—I can't keep calling her the new arrival—what's her name, anyway?
(Prompter: Anna. It's Anna)
Anna, then. The new arrival will henceforth be referred to as Anna. Well,Anna recognized that voice, and really did not want to be on the receiving end of it.
"I'm guessing that if I say yes, you'll cast my soul into eternal torment in the depths of hell, and if I say no, I will get the same result because I was screaming about the paranormal in my sleep. Am I correct?"
"Bingo."
"Okay then. Just wanted to get that clear. Well, yes, I originally did, but some psycho pig named Chuckles got mad at me for using his name, so he kidnapped me, stuck me here, and began writing me into my own fanfiction. His revenge, I guess."
'Anna' then got a coconut thrown at her head.
"That hurt!"
"Duh, Captain Obvious. You remind me of my annoying older brother."
"If you stalk me and try to convince your puny race I'm invading, you shall die like an insect by the might of ZIM!" Zim added.
"Uh, sorry, I might do that. Comes with the job of being obsessed with the paranormal."
Gaz groaned. All she needed was another Dib, which she got. Stupid karma.
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RealiTV 8, contestants"Our other, more reluctant, contestants will be joining us shortly." Said some man from ETV to the assembled cast of Nicktoons. "Ah, here they are now." A flash of light, and Gaz, Zim, Red and Pur, and Anna appeared.
"Was that magic? Where'd it come from? I wanna see it!" Anna asked, curious.
"Shut up, or I will rip your windpipe out of your throat and feed it to rabid squirrels." Gaz threatened her. Anna immediately shut up.
"As I was say—oh, Irk! My Tallest!" exclaimed the ETV guy.
"Eh?" Said Red. The RTV man pressed a button on his watch, and a hologram dissipated, leaving an Irken in its place. "So, Kav. You have failed. You-know-who is still alive." While saying thus, he motioned toward Zim.
"I was about to kill him, My Tallest!" Kav said.
"Fry cook or busboy?" Red whispered to Pur.
"Busboy, definitely. And isn't 'Tallest' grammatically incorrect? I mean, they're addressing two people, not one."
"We can worry about stupid stuff like that later." The three Irkens disappeared in another freak wormhole accident, leaving Kav's fate to who-knows-what. But I think we can safely assume that he was banished to Foodcourtia for incompetence, doomed to scrub tables and fill napkin containers for the rest of his days…
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Almost instantly, another ETV person appeared, seemingly out of thin air.
"Oh, my, god. Was that magic? Awesome! Where'd it come from!" Dib squealed.
"Do I have to repeat myself?" Gaz threatened. This shut Dib up, too.
"Well, let me explain everything, before I am exiled to life wiping tables, get my windpipe forcibly removed, and/or have some other possibly unpleasant thing happen to me. Well, first off, you are on RealiTV 8, the planet where all reality shows take place."
Jimmy, Sheen, Carl, Libby, and Cindy had a sense of foreboding. They had been on a reality game show like this once before, and they had a feeling it could go similarly. "You are on the show Survival: RealiTV 8. Second, you will be split into three groups of seven."
"Hey, how do we have three groups of seven when there are only 20 of us, including Goddard, and Timmy's fairy holograms?" asked Jimmy.
"Those aren't holograms, you moron, they're REAL FAIRIES!" Dib and Anna shouted at the same time.
"Holograms!"
"Fairies!"
"Holograms!"
"Fairies!"
"I think I'm staying out of this." Anna said wisely.
The two others (Dib and Jimmy) ensued in a bighead boy fight to the death.
"Break it up, bigheads." Said the ETV person, prying the two apart just as Jimmy was going to strangle Dib.
"My head's not big!" The two of them said at the same time.
"Yes, they are. They're like watermelons—wait, no, they're bigger!"
Though Dib and Jimmy hated each other's guts, they now had a mutual enemy: The ETV guy. (Said guy's real name is Billy-Bob-Joe-Steve-Willy-Bo-Billy-Ishkiddlyniddly-Larry-Steve-John-Jacob-Jingleheimer-Schmidt-Harry-Jared Thompson, but that won't fit on a business card, so he wishes to be known as Bob.)
"Well, back to Jimmy's question. Oy, GIR!" GIR walked out, wearing his dog suit. "You can take the suit off."
The dysfunctional, insane, schizophrenic little robot unzipped the zipper, jumped out, and began singing, 'I'm naked! I'm naked!'
"GIR…GIR…here, boy!" Anna called. She pulled out a taco out from her bag. "I have a taco for you…"
GIR happily ran up to receive the taco, downing it in one bite. "Taco girl! Me loves you, yes I dooooo…" He began hugging her leg.
"Aww, he likes me." She cooed.
"How'd you get a taco!" Timmy asked her.
(Flashback)
"Could you pass the ketchup?" Sheldon asked Jen—Wait, that's the wrong flashback, too. What's with you people! Anyway…
(Real flashback)
"Anna, I got tacos. You want some?" her mom called into the house.
"Sure!" I'll save it for later, she thought. She stuck it into her purse on the computer desk.
About thirty minutes later
The door opened, but nobody seemed to be there.
"Who's there? Why can't I stop speaking in questions?" Somebody walked up behind her and grasped her neck.
"Aagh, stop choking me!" Anna shouted. She then grabbed the purse (with the taco in it), and began attacking her assailant. "I don't wanna be on reality TV, especially not—aagh!" She passed out, still clutching the purse with the taco in it. She was then whisked to RealiTV 8.
(End flashback)
"And that's how I got the taco."
"Weird."
"A-HEM!" Bob cleared his throat. "Third, you will compete against each other in games, and the winners get whatever they want. Within reason, meaning under 2 million bucks, no world peace, no world CONQUEST (Zim looked a little crestfallen at this), and so on. Now leave me alone while I put you on teams."
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Three hours later
"Screw it, I'm just gonna pull your names out of a hat." Said Bob as he was walking back toward the group. Of course, nobody was listening. "Oh, forget being polite. SHUT UP AND LISTEN!" he shouted, getting everyone's attention but two.
"We'll finish this discussion later. But the abominable snowman would SO kick Bigfoot's hairy ass." Anna whispered to Dib.
"Would not!"
"I SAID SHUT UP!" Bob shouted again. Finally they shut up. "As I was saying, I'm gonna pull your names out of a hat."
He then produced a large black top hat from nowhere.
"How'd you do that? Do you know magic?" Dib asked him.
"Not how you think of it, but the optical illusion kind. Anyway, back to picking teams." He motioned his arm fancily, then reached into the hat. "The first person on team one is…" he pulled his hand out. "Goddard the robot dog!"
"Go on, boy. It's alright." Jimmy reassured Goddard. Goddard walked over to the palm tree with a sign that said 'team one' on it.
"Person two on team one is… Sheldon Lee!" Sheldon eagerly ran over to Goddard, pulled some tools from Irk-knows-where, and began trying to disassemble Goddard.
"Stop it! Goddard isn't some science project you can take apart!" Jimmy shouted. "Wait…technically, he is, but…stop it Sheldon!" Sheldon stopped abruptly, a sheepish grin on his face.
"He's like that with any sort of technology." Jenny said to Jimmy.
"Person three!" shouted Bob, snapping everyone back to reality. "Wanda…uh, er, do fairies even have last names?"
"You know, I have no idea." Wanda said, floating over to group one.
"Anyway, person four is…Jimmy Neutron!" Jimmy ran over and began shielding Goddard from Sheldon, who was still trying to take Goddard apart.
"Five is…Timmy Turner!" Timmy walked over nonchalantly. "And person six will be…Dib Membrane!"
"Fairies!" Dib shouted upon seeing Wanda.
"Dude, you're like my teacher." Timmy informed him.
"At least you're nothing like mine."
"And last but not least, the final member of team one is…Brad Carbunkle!"
If looks could kill, Brad and Sheldon would have killed each other right then and there.
"And that concludes team one!" announced Bob. "Team two will be…"
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Chuckles: Muahahahaha, I am so terribly evil, making a cliffhanger. So terribly, terribly, E-V-I-L.
Me: No, you're just lame. So terribly, terribly L-A-M-E. Lamey, lamey, lame, that you are.
Chuckles: Only I, the Dark Lord Chuckles, the Silly Piggy may talk like that!
Me: Well, technically, I'm the Dark Lord Chuckles, the Silly Piggy too, that I am, so I can talk like that as well. And isn't it usually Shego who talks like that, anyway?
Chuckles: You've got a point…hey, how'd you get off of RealiTV 8!
Me: I hijacked a spaceship, that I did.
Chuckles: (snaps fingers, I get whisked away, back to RealiTV 8)
Me: I should have seen that coming. Well, while I'm still in the closing, I just wanna say this: Why, Nick, why! Why are you doing this to us! I was a devoted fan to both Fairly Oddparents AND Danny Phantom, and you're taking them both away, that you are! Why!
Danny and Timmy: Take us away?
Me: You know, get cancelled?
Danny and Timmy: Shit.
Danny: You know, a kid your age really shouldn't be swearing.
Timmy: Hey, I began in 2001, right? That means I SHOULD be 15! That's as old as YOU are! And that doesn't count the 'Oh Yeah!' Cartoons!
Me: The kid's right, that he is.
Zim: You know, it's not really that hard being cancelled. At least you didn't die prematurely, like us.
Dib: Yeah. We kept getting shunted around, and aired at 5 freaking' AM. We barely got one season done! Timmy's got at least five, and Danny's getting continued to three.
Me: Well, I guess we all could look at it that way…wait, I'm not talking like Kenshin anymore…woohoo!
Dib, Timmy, Zim, and Danny: Who's Kenshin?
Me: Nevermind. Well, anyway, to save Danny, sign the following! Just copy them into your address bar(without the spaces, duh.)
http/ www. petitionspot. com/ petitions/ fightfordanny
http/ www. petitionspot. com/ petitions/ DannyPhantom
http/ www. petitionspot. com/ petitions/ SaveDannyplease
This wasn't really my favorite chapter to write, but I had to introduce them all to the show, didn't I? Remember, flames are for marshmallows, not the butts of fanfiction authors.