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Chapter 12

(Cassandra)

Aggie was asleep in her bed, and Asa was on the floor in a sleeping bag. I sat in my bed, a small lamp illuminating the journal in front of me. It was unopened and I stared at it wondering if I even wanted to know what was in it. Sighing I leaned back against the wall and tried to relax. I let my mind wander to the fun we had had only an hour earlier.

Joey had gotten brain freeze from eating his cake too fast and had danced around the apartment, his hands clapped to his forehead as he waited for the pain to abate. I told Asa that I hadn't thought that the blond could even get brain freeze because I didn't think he had a brain. Then Joey had challenged everyone to a contest to see who could keep his or her spoon on their nose the longest. The prize was the last piece of cake, and Yami won, but then Joey told him that the two of them had to arm wrestle over it. Joey had blatantly cheated, grabbed the cake and wolfed it down, giving himself yet another bout of brain freeze.

After that I had to teach everyone how to dance and we promenaded and spun all around, laughing so hard. I danced with Joey, because he was the truly hopeless one, Aggie had Yami and Asa was stuck with Yugi. It was like a herd of elephants trampling through the room.

"...you shatter..." Aggie murmured in her sleep. She was still scribbling lyrics on any available surface and humming bars under her breath when she wasn't sleeping, and even if she was, she still dreamed about it. It was almost cute, but sometimes it got a little annoying. My twin. We were nothing alike, but at the same time there was something twining around us and linking us together.

Looking back down at the worn journal in my hands I thought about it some more. Why had my mom and dad dumped Yami, Aggie and me and not Yugi? What was so bad about us? I had to read it, if not for me, for the other two. They deserved to know why they were kicked to the curb.

A week later

Sitting at the lunch table I glanced over at Asa who was sketching in her pad, a serious look etched into her face. Aggie was whispering her song to herself as she copied the notes down onto the music paper in front of her. Tristan and Duke were arm wrestling over some girl, while Joey and Yugi played a card game. Sighing I picked up the journal I had just gotten to. So far all I knew was that my mother was a half-way decent student, who worked as a part-time waitress and was degraded by her family. Right now she was dating some dude named Takeo, he seemed like a nice guy, but Aneko didn't think she was good enough for him.

Blue. It turned blue. How is it possible? We took all precautions. We were never careless. But it's blue. I cannot tell you how stunned I am. How am I to tell Takeo? He has such a promising future ahead of him; he is in his third year of college. This could ruin all of his chances.

I on the other hand as you know, am a poor high school senior who knows she will not go far. This child growing inside of me may be the end to all of Takeo's hopes, but to me it's a miracle. My whole life I have been told that I will never amount to anything, but here, inside of me is a small, beautiful life that I can nurture.

But should I tell Takeo? I know he would never consider marrying me over a child. I am a nobody, with no future. Maybe I should just leave, I could tell him that it's time to move on, and then run with my precious child. Though Takeo does have the right to know that he has fathered a child, it is his as well. Takeo said it was my honesty that drew him to me, so I should be true to him now and let him know about our baby.

What if he thinks I did this on purpose to try and tie him to me? I haven't even met his parents. What if he believes it is someone else's? Will he hate me? Cast me aside? Well my darling baby, I will not despair, because I have you. The two of us will be just fine if he doesn't want us. We are a package you and I, forever and for always.

"Asa, what's up with you? You've been acting like an obsessed woman!" Téa joked and I glanced at Asa. Her head had snapped up, and her notebook had been instinctively pressed against her chest.

"What?" she demanded irritably. "Can't you see I'm drawing?"

"You seem tired, are you ok?" Téa questioned. I looked at Asa; she had her sunglasses pushed up onto her head, revealing eyes shadowed by lack of sleep.

"I'm fine," Asa dismissed easily as she rolled her eyes and bent back over her drawing. Her fingers were stained brown and black, and the acrid smell of chemicals clung to her like her own personal scent. A bunch of photos fell out of her jacket pocket and I stooped down to pick them up.

The one on the top was a picture of Marik backstage, lounging against a wall, half in his costume, a bottle of water hanging from his hand. The next was a picture of Marik slumped across a desk, fast asleep. Another showed him sitting alone playing a guitar, while the one after it was him leaning against a motorcycle. Picture after picture revealed Marik in his nature element, without his social facade in place.

"Are these yours?" I queried and Asa looked at me.

"Shit!" she exclaimed snatching them up from me.

"Are you stalking him?" I asked next.

"Not in the way you think," Asa sighed. She turned her sketchbook toward me to let me see the drawing, which was almost finish and depicted Marik stretched out on a bus seat. "I just want to draw him. I love to draw people in their natural elements. I don't want them to pose for me, because then I won't get them."

"So you take pictures and then draw from them?" I watched Asa nod, and give me a half smile.

"I'm not half-bad either," she informed me. "I got a drawing of you; I'll bring it in for you sometime. For the time being though, keep things hushed. I don't need any future prey warned off." Shaking my head I looked down at the next entry.

Sorry I haven't written in a while. I have just been sooo busy! I just came down off cloud nine from learning that Takeo didn't want to ditch us. He said that we should wait to get married until I at least had graduated from school and he had a steady job. I am so excited! I've been looking at different names for the baby. I really like the name Yama, so maybe that if it's a girl or Takumi if it's a boy.

I met Takeo's father the other day, and I can't get over the fact that I think he hates me. Whenever he looked at me during the visit, it was as though he was looking at a piece of trash. He didn't speak to me except when we were introduced, and after that he asked Takeo all his questions and ignored me. Did I do something wrong? I don't know and I'm so scared. What if Takeo decides I'm not worth his time because his father hates me? What should I do? The only thing I can think of is to try and make him like me by being as agreeable as possible. I'll have to stop being such a dunce, and act like a sophisticated woman.

I have to go to work now, I hope that the patrons tip well tonight. Heaven knows I need the extra money. Five months until graduation.

"Cassandra, time to go to your next class," Asa told me. Making a noncommittal noise I stood up and shoved my stuff into my bag.

"Thanks," I murmured and Asa shrugged. "We're going to be selecting the next play that the school is putting on. I'll be sure to keep you posted about what part Marik gets."

"Quicksilver," Asa replied quickly. "Call him Quicksilver. That way no one will no who we speak of."

"Ok," I chuckled as I hurried down to my classroom. Marik was already slouched down in his desk and on the board were the names of a bunch of plays. Les Misérables, The Phantom of the Opera, Twelfth Night, Bang Bang You're Dead, Beauty and the Beast, Fiddler on the Roof, Wicked, Rent, and Suessical the Musical.

"You have to choose three plays that you want to do," the teacher told me as she handed me a piece of paper. Sitting down at my desk I quickly picked Les Misérables, Bang Bang You're Dead, and Twelfth Night. I then handed it in and picked up the journal.

I've had one hell of a week. They basically tripled my shift so I had to skip school to work them and because of that I missed work and I failed a test horribly. I haven't gotten the grade back yet, but I know I did. The guys I served were complete pigs and kept trying to feel me up, and get me to "have some fun." I wonder what they would say if I told them I was pregnant! The expressions on their faces! But I can't tell anyone because I don't want to lose my job or be kicked out of school.

The thing that topped it all off was that Takeo has been extremely distant. He's called me only twice and both conversations were less than ten minutes. After both of them I cried myself to sleep. I don't know if it's the baby that's making me so emotional, or the idea that the end is in sight. I just have this feeling in my chest that he's going to break it off with me and soon. Even speaking of it brings me to the edge of hysteria.

How will I support us if he does ditch us? I have no money saved up, and my parents have told me a million times that they will not take care of me if I ever get pregnant. I could probably go to a shelter for help, but that's not permanent. My heart is breaking inside me, and I have nothing to help the pain.

Oh my child, what am I to do?

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