AUTHOR: trista groulx (the dustytiger)
DISCLAIMER: kim, faith, fred, joey, bobby, jimmy, bosco, davis, sully, none of these characters are mine, i'm just borowing them to play with them for a little while, they belong to their creator and the actors and actresses who portray them, i promise i'll be gentle, don't sue
RATING: PG-13 tops currently
CONTENT: kim/faith friendship, fred/faith divorce, kim/bobby r, faith/bosco sex/ust
SPOILERS: 32 bullets and a broken heart (missing scene/continuation)
SUMMARY: Kim and Faith become friends after they share their heartaches that Valintines day.
AUTHORS NOTES: and the drama starts, oh my yes it does, just stay tuned to find out where it all goes, i really hope you dig where this is going, cause it's not what i thought i'd do but i think it works, read to find out what i'm taliing about, review for updates ;)
Bobby was starting to get used to waking as Kim flew out bed to the bathroom. She had done this four mornings in a row now. He knew that she was being sick, and he felt horrible for her.
He got up, and stood outside the bathroom. He heard the toilet flush, then the water running. Moments later she came out. He hugged her.
"Kim, I'm really worried about you," he said, kissing her forehead.
"I don't know what's wrong with me," she whispered.
"Maybe you're-"
"Bobby I've taken three different tests, they all say I'm not. Besides if I was pregnant I'd be gaining a bit of weight, not losing it."
"Then why don't you see a doctor?"
"It's probably just a stomach flu."
"I'd be sick too if it was just a flu."
"Not necessarily, you could have a strong immune system." She teased.
"And Joey too?"
She shrugged. "I'm sure it's nothing, I just need to get some rest today."
"I really think it's more then that. Your body is trying to tell you something, it would make me feel a lot better if you would just see a doctor."
She hugged him, close. "I'll be fine, I don't need to see a doctor."
"Kim, please."
Joey came out of his room, and gasped when he saw his mother.
"Mommy, what's wrong?" he asked.
"I think I have the flu, why?"
"You're really white. I think you need to go to the doctor."
"I'm fine, Joey," she tried to assure him.
"Nu-uh, if I looked that sick you'd make me go see the doctor."
"I'm fine, I don't think I need to go to the doctor.
"Bobby make Mommy go to the doctor!" Joey demanded, almost whining.
Kim had never seen Joey act like that before, and she didn't like to see him like that. He seemed very insistent about her seeing a doctor.
She hadn't wanted to admit it before, but there was something really wrong with her. The way Joey had reacted to her, proved to her that it could be something more then what she wanted to believe.
Also, that morning she had noticed some blood in her vomit. She assumed it was because she had been sick so often. But now she thought it could something more. She didn't want to tell Bobby about it, though.
Now with everything, her being pale, the blood in the vomit, the stomach cramping, she realized that there could be something seriously wrong with her.
Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea to see a doctor, but she just didn't really want to. She didn't want to worry her son, and the sooner she saw a doctor the sooner she could tell him, honestly, that she'd be just fine.
"All right, all right, I'll go see a doctor.," she told her son. "Will that make you feel better?"
"Yes," said Joey, before going into the bathroom.
"Do you want me to go with you?" Bobby offered.
"I'm a big girl I think I can handle a simple doctor's appointment."
"What if it's something serious?"
She shook her head. "You worry too much."
XX
At Faith's she was trying to get the kids up. She hated weekday mornings. While Faith knew that she could ask Katri to do it, she knew that this was some of the only one on one time she had with her kids, and she didn't want to lose that.
"Emily!" Faith yelled, getting annoyed. "Get up!"
"I'm up," grumbled, groggily.
"You're not up! You're down! Get up!"
Emily grudgingly rolled out of her bed. Her hair was a giant poof ball, and she looked annoyed. Faith left the room, to continue making breakfast for them.
She had decided to make them French toast that morning. Charlie was already sat down, and had started his breakfast.
Emily came out of her room, dressed with her hair still unbrushed a few minutes later. She sat down across from her brother, and soon found a plate of food in front of her, as well as a glass of milk.
"Milk?" Emily asked.
Faith rolled her eyes. "Since when do you not drink milk?"
"I just don't want it today."
"And I'm supposed to know you're having an I don't like milk day?"
Emily shrugged. "Can I please have juice instead?"
"I'll take the milk!" Charlie exclaimed.
"All right, whatever," Faith said.
Charlie gulped down the milk then left the table. Faith had noticed that her daughter had not been herself of late.
"Hey, Em, what's wrong?" Faith asked.
"School," she muttered.
"What about school?"
"My new teacher, and everyone in my class."
"What are they doing?"
"They won't stop asking me if I'm okay about Dad leaving. I mean I was fine last year, and all summer why would I not be fine now?"
Faith shrugged. "This has to be so hard for you."
Emily nodded. "I like everything right now, Mom. Yeah, there's times when I miss Dad, but things are good now. You're so happy, and Katri's really fun."
"Then tell them that."
"I do, and they don't believe me." Emily shrugged. "It's like it's a problem that I'm not sad anymore. I couldn't be sad forever right?"
"No, of course not."
"So why are they making me feel like a giant butthead cause I'm happy again?"
Faith shrugged. "I don't know, Sweetie, I wish I did."
Emily nodded. "Maybe I'll talk to Lyn next time we go."
"I think that's a good idea.
Lyn was Emily's therapist, who they still saw every two weeks, just to be sure that everything was still going all right.
The two kids were making amazing progress, and Faith was happy to hear it. She was glad that her kids were back to being themselves. She just didn't like the idea of people telling her that she couldn't do so.
It had been too long since she was last able to just have coffee with Kim, and she really wanted to talk to her friend. She decided she'd call her after she got the kids off to school.
All too soon the kids had to make their way to school. It was a reasonably warm day, and Faith was already dreading winter coming.
Although Emily insisted they were old enough to walk to school alone, together, Faith still made sure that someone always walk with them. She had seen too much in her line of work to just let them go by themselves.
She knew she would have to let go eventually, but she wanted to hold out at as long as possible. Faith had however agreed to let them walk the last block alone so that their friends would not see that they were still being walked to school by their paranoid cop mother.
When Faith got back home she called Kim, and was surprised when she didn't get an answer. Faith decided she might try going to work a little early in hopes that Kim would be there early too.
Soon she decide that she needed to have a nap. She did this most mornings before she had to work. She went into her room, curled up on her bed, and was asleep within moments.
xxxx
Kim sat in the doctor's office, hating that she had decided to go alone. She knew that it was nothing, and there was no point in Bobby taking a day off too. She picked up a magazine, and started to read it.
"Kim," she heard her name being called.
She put the magazine down, and followed the young woman who lead her to a room. She sat down, and waited for her doctor. She was nervous, but knew that she'd be just fine.
Kim was glad to see her doctor, Doctor White, walk into the room.
"How are you today?" he asked.
Kim nodded. "I guess I could be better."
"All right, what seems to be the problem today?"
"I've been having stomach cramps, and been sick to my stomach a lot of late."
"So you'd like a pregnancy test?"
Kim shook her head. "Here's the problem, I've taken three home tests, and all of them have been a very clear negative. I don't feel like I did when I was pregnant with my son either."
"Oh, all right, what do you think the problem is?"
"I have no idea. I'm sure it's just stress, or something."
"All right, what are you stressing about?"
Kim thought for a moment, and realized there was nothing really to be stressing out about. She was happier then she had been in a long time, everything seemed to be going right of late.
Work was not any worse then usual. Jimmy was taking her relationship with Bobby almost too well. Since Bobby had moved in and everything seemed to prefect. She wasn't actually stressed about anything.
"Now that I'm thinking about it, I can't think of anything really stressful going on," Kim explained.
He nodded. "So how long have you been feeling like this?"
"The stomach cramps started about a month ago, I guess. The vomiting about two weeks, ago now, and has been getting worse and worse."
"All right, how have you been eating?"
"I can't keep anything down, I've tried cutting out certain things but nothing helps Water sometimes makes me sick."
The doctor nodded. "Any other symptoms?"
"Not really, but this morning there was some blood when I was sick."
"All right, well this could be serious, I'm sure it's just nerves or something, though."
Kim nodded. "All right."
"I'm going to have you do one more pregnancy test here, just to be absolutely certain it's not that, and then I'm going to get you in for an x-ray of your stomach."
Kim nodded. "That sounds good."
"So you'll be stuck her for a little while, but I'd rather just get to the bottom of this. I'll get one of my assistants to help you."
Kim nodded. "Thank you."
XX
Faith got to work early, and sure enough she saw Bobby's SUV, and assumed that Kim was around too. She went into the firehouse, and was surprised to only see Bobby.
"Hey, Bobby," Faith called. "Where's Kim?"
"She's at the doctor's," he told her.
"Oh."
"She didn't tell you she hasn't been feeling well lately?"
"Not really, she mentioned a while ago that she was having stomach cramps, but I assumed they went away. We haven't really had much of a chance to sit down and just talk lately."
"Oh, well the cramps are stilling bugging her, so she decided to go to the doctor today."
She nodded. "Does she think she's pregnant?"
"She did until three different tests told her she wasn't."
"That's really strange. That would have been my first thought."
"You and everyone else's." Bobby laughed. "But no, that's not it. She not pregnant."
"What do you think it could be?"
Bobby shrugged. "I have no idea, I just hope it's nothing too serious."
"Yeah, I hope so too."
"So she hasn't told you anything about what might be wrong?"
"I'm sorry, I wish I could tell you that she has, but she hasn't."
"I'm so worried about her, I just wish I knew what was going on."
"Why didn't you go with her?" Faith was a little puzzled.
"She didn't want me to go with her. You know her she's so stubborn"
Faith nodded. "I'm sure it'll end up being nothing."
Bobby smiled. "I'm sure it will be too. Was there anything you wanted me to tell her when I get home tonight?"
"Just tell her I'll call her when I'm off shift."
"All right, I will. See you later Faith."
"Yeah," she said, leaving.
Faith hoped that there was nothing wrong with her friend. It had been a while since they had had time get together for coffee, and she hoped that when she called that night she wasn't going to get bad news.
XX
Back at the doctor's office Kim was nervously waiting her x-ray results. She already knew what the pregnancy test would read. She knew she was not pregnant, and worried about what could possibly be wrong with her.
She wanted to believe that it was nothing too serious, but the medical training she had told her that that wasn't the case. She wanted to ignore it, and hope it would go away, but she knew that was not the answer.
She was worried, and she could not make the feeling that it was something really major go away.
Everything had been working out so well of late, that she knew that something would have to ruin it soon. It was just the way her life had always worked. She'd get something good, and suddenly something would go wrong.
She didn't want this to be one of those times. She wanted everything to keep going well, but there had to be something seriously wrong with her. Soon she was called back into the exam room.
Suddenly she wanted Bobby to be there to tell her that it was going to be all right. She knew logically it would, but she just wanted him there. She had a feeling she was going to be bad news, and she wanted him close.
The doctor came in a moment later, and Kim waited to hear what he had to say.
"So, as we suspected the pregnancy test is negative," said the doctor.
"I know that, so what's wrong with me?"
"From the x-rays I just took of your stomach, I can defiantly see something. I have forwarded them along to a colleague of mine, who I want you to make an appointment with as soon as possible."
Kim nodded. "What kind of colleague?"
"An oncologist."
She went pale. "I'm sorry, did you just say an oncologist?"
"Yes, I'm not sure that it is a tumor, but I'd rather eliminate that possibility first."
"Wouldn't you want to eliminate everything else, and then go to the extreme possibilities?'
"Normally, yes, but if it is a cancerous tumor I would rather treat it immediately. Stomach cancer is one of the hardest to treat, because as soon as it goes past the stomach there is about a ten percent chance of recovery."
"Are you telling me that I'm going to die?"
"No, if it is cancer from the size of what I saw in your x-rays it would be safe to assume you are at an early stage, and the odds for survival are much higher. I would rather illuminate the possibility of stomach cancer first, so I do not regret not doing it sooner."
Kim nodded. "So what kind of procedure am I going to need tomorrow?"
"It's going to be an endoscopy, where the-"
"I know what an endoscopy is," Kim assured the doctor.
Just thought of having to have to swallow a tube disgusted her. She wanted to call Bobby right away, and tell him. But then she realized that she might just end up worrying him for nothing. She didn't want him to think that she might have cancer if she really didn't.
"Do I need someone there with me?" Kim asked.
"It's recommended but not necessary. You will most likely be sedated, so they prefer that you have someone to at least pick you up."
Kim nodded. "All right."
"Of course when you make the appointment they'll be able to give your more information, and answer all your questions."
Kim nodded. "All right."
"I'm sorry I had such bad news for you," said the doctor, shaking her hand. "Talk to my receptionist on the way out, and she'll help you set up an appointment as soon as possible."
"All right, thank you."
xxxx
Kim was laying in bed staring at the ceiling when Bobby got home from work. Joey had long since gone to bed. She hadn't told him what was going on, and hoped that she would have good news for him after the appointment the next day.
He had been perfectly content that she had actually gone to the doctor, and she was going to go to another one who should be able to make her better the next day.
Bobby came into the bedroom, and kissed Kim lightly, on the lips. She pulled away and smiled at him. He laid down next to her, and ran his hand through her hair.
"What did the doctor say?" Bobby asked her.
"He wants me to go see a specialist tomorrow," she replied. "He doesn't think it's really to worry about, he wants a second opinion."
"Oh, all right, did he give you any indication as to what it might be?"
Kim shook her head. "No, not really, he said that the doctor tomorrow should have more answers for me."
"All right, and the tests were right?"
Kim laughed. "I'm not pregnant."
She suddenly wished it was that simple. She didn't want to tell him that the specialist was actually an oncologist. She didn't want him to worry if he didn't have to. Her doctor had said it was probably not that, and she wanted to believe it.
"Faith said she'd call you tonight when she got off shift," Bobby told her.
"Oh, did she say about what?" Kim asked.
"No, she just said that you haven't really been talking of late, and she was hoping that you'd be there to have coffee with."
Kim smiled. "Yeah, I could use some good girl talk right about now."
"I'm going to go make myself a before bed snack, you want something?"
"No, I'm good, I managed to keep supper down, and I want to keep it that way."
He kissed her on the forehead, and left the room.
A few minutes later the phone rang. Kim picked up the phone.
"Hi?" said Kim.
"Hey," said Faith. "How was the doctor today?"
"Not too bad, he wants me to see another one tomorrow."
"So what's wrong with you?"
"Don't know yet, the doctor tomorrow is a specialist, and should have more answers. So how are you?"
Faith realized that Kim didn't really want to talk about that. "I'm pretty good. I've been meaning to call you since Bosco met Katri."
"Yeah, it's been kind of crazy around here the last few days."Kim laughed. "Did you need a mop to sop up the drool?"
"Not quiet, I was surprised. He tried to hit on her, but she wanted nothing to do with him."
"Good for her!"
"Thanks, Kim you're supposed to be my friend."
Kim laughed. "Sorry, you know what I mean. You know how to handle Bosco, unlike most of his unsuspecting prey."
Faith began laughing. "That's very true."
"So what's going on with you two?"
"The same as what was going on before," Faith laughed nervously.
"I don't know, I swear I heard you smile when you mentioned him."
"Heard me smile?"
"You know what I mean! Like the way my voice changes when I speak about Bobby."
"Yeah, right!"
"And now I bet you're blushing!"
"I am not!" Faith lied.
"All right, fine you don't have a thing for your partner, are you happy now?"
"Even if I did, like him like that, I'm still not ready for anything serious after Fred."
"I thought you said Bosco didn't know how to have a serious relationship?"
Faith laughed, nervously. "I didn't think he did until he started saying stuff the other day."
"What kind of stuff?"
"He was telling me about the kind of woman he would settle down with, and I felt like he was describing me."
"Someone's full over herself."
"Hear me out. He said he wanted a couple of kids one day. He said he'd want to settle down with a redhead with a nice smile, who's fit and has a nice rack."
Kim laughed. "You've been around him way too much. But, yeah that could be you."
"And he knows that I think my smile is one of my best features."
"Would it be so bad to settle down with him?"
Faith laughed. "I don't know, it just took me off my guard you know?"
"Yeah."
"I mean this is Bosco, my partner. Besides, I'm nowhere near the point of wanting to settle down again."
"Then if he asks you point blank, tell him so."
"Yeah, I know, I will."
Kim yawned. "I hate to cut this short, but I'm really tired all of a sudden."
"That's fine, I should be getting some sleep soon too. But call me tomorrow with the news, weather it's good or bad, all right?"
"I promise I will."
"Good night then."
"Good night."
Kim hung up the phone, and then curled up in bed, and fell asleep almost immediately.
tbc.
end
notes: an oncologist? what's gonna happen? stay tuned to find out, big
thanx to twbasketcase for her input! this one's for you!