Author note: Wow I never thought I would get such a good response to my story I'm so happy everyone reviewed! I would list all of the people but there are too many. I'm so happy you all like it and I hope you keep reviewing.
Previously on The ghost of you: "Brat listen and listen well I'm not fucking anyone behind your back so stop accusing me every fucking day" he dropped me with a thud, I winced from the drop and watched him disappear and laughed softly to the air
"What happened to us Eiri am I so disgusting to you"? I said softly getting up brushing the dirt off myself and I headed toward N-G records
Just pretend, just pretend everything's alright and it'll go away.
I couldn't tell anyone about Yuki's behavior toward me I winced at the bruise forming on my forehead from the drop and sighed softly as I entered the building we started recording as we finished I noticed Hiro's concerned face
"Shuichi is their something your hiding" he uttered softly I nodded no and headed out pretending everything was alright I headed home to find the house empty, I climbed into the bed and stroked Yuki's side of the bed, How many night's has it being since I've held you? How many nights will this pretend love go on for?
I heard the door close and an angry growl and the laugh of a female voice I winced and closed my eyes pretending wishing it would go away. I heard the girl ask
"What about that kid in your room"? I looked up and heard the laugh of Yuki he sounded drunk his voice was slurred as he spoke the next words
"Oh him he's just my cousin" I winced and my tears gently fell out of my eyes and landed on the bed he's just my cousin. I heard the girl scream and Yuki grunt and the woman laughed hotly and she left the apartment I heard the door slam and the bedroom door open up quickly I shivered in disgust at Yuki as he towered over me
"Brat see I told you I wasn't cheating" he said in a slurred matter. I winced as he roughly placed me on his lap and I felt his hot breath on my ear his hands trailed over my arms and he seemed to snap out of his drunken state when he saw the marks on my arms
"What is this"? He screamed I shivered lightly how could I reply? "Tell me" he screamed, I winced I'd be better if I told him it's not like he'll remember "I cut myself" I said simply he shook a little and held me close gently
"Why"? He said simply his fingers digging through my hair "because I'm sick of the way you treat me, I'm sick of life, why do you care? All you do is fuck behind my back" I said in disgust and he let me go tears dribbled out of his eyes and he backed away
"I'm sorry" he said quietly leaving me in the bedroom alone.
"I'm sorry Yuki" I uttered quietly to the air quietly and closed my eyes and dreamt of a life where I was happy and free where I was not alone where I was loved.
Chapter 1: I'll Never be Him
Shuichi's P.O.V
I awoke to the sound of breaking glass I looked around quickly and heard an outraged scream. My eyes adjusted to the light I ran out to find Yuki smashing bottles his golden eyes glittering with unsuppressed emotions.
"Yuki" I uttered quietly he turned quickly his eyes were glittering; I moved closer his hands were bleeding and scars were forming. "Yuki what happened" he turned away quickly his blonde hair covering his face. He moved his hand over the glass quickly and blood spilt forth
"Yuki stop" I screamed he turned to me harshly, his eyes glittered softly I looked around there was nothing indicating alcohol, or substance abuse.
"Does it hurt when you cut yourself"? He asked quietly rubbing his fingers over his cuts, "Does it feel painful"? He asked quietly I almost didn't hear him but he uttered under his breath softly "am I that bad, does he really cut himself"? He said clutching his bleeding arm.
I moved forward quickly grasping his bleeding arm and I tore a bit of my shirt and wrapped it around his bleeding arm "Yuki" I said softly he pulled away quickly and his tears spilled forth "How can you look at me after all of this after what I do to you"? He said between tears. I looked at Yuki his blonde hair was scattered over his face trickling down his eyes I clutched him gently and uttered softly in his ears its ok, its ok.
He pulled away gently and said softly "Shuichi maybe we need some time apart I mean to maybe think of us" he said softly stroking his fingers through my fine pink hair. I clutched him tightly and the hot tears fell out of my face and landed on the carpet. He sighed and stroked my chin
"Shuichi I don't want to hurt you anymore I really think we should consider thinking about this" he said softly and he got up leaving me on the floor to ponder my own thoughts.
A little while later I had called Hiro and asked him if I could live with him for awhile. I remembered his concerned voice over the phone I had told him it was nothing but obviously he knew it was something.
The phone slipped from my fingers as I hanged up the phone I heard the dull busy signal of the phone, was this how relationships were supposed to be?
I stared at my bags in my hands I had packed up my bags and I had soon after called Hiro. I stared at the door and Yuki stood at the door his blonde hair covered his eyes and he gently held me one last time his hot breath on my neck he bit me gently and pulled me up so his golden eyes locked with mine and said softly kissing me gently. Our tongues danced for dominance and he uttered biting that spot one last time
"Don't forget me yet" he said softly and he pushed me out the door I heard the slam behind me and I clutched my forehead, "Yuki" I said softly walking away my razor in my pocket laced with freshly sliced blood.
I stared at the sidewalk as I walked it seemed to be getting smaller and smaller as I approached Hiro's house, It was large and well lit I approached the door and knocked quickly, Hiro smiled widely and said softly "Hey Shuichi come on in" I nodded putting on my happy face hiding behind a mask was the best thing to do.
"Shuichi what really happened between you and Yuki"? He said softly his mahogany colored hair gleaming in the light. I looked at him softly my eyes closing softly and I uttered back completely breaking down.
"Yuki said we need some time apart" I uttered gently falling to the ground my shoulders started shaking and my tears escaping my eyes. Hiro got down beside me and slid his hand on my chin and pulled it onto his shoulder.
"Shuichi listen if he's being this way then he doesn't deserve you" he said softly his fingers trailing into my hair I groaned softly and he pulled me closer. I felt the razor in my pocket and sighed man did I ever need to cut.
I felt his fingers hold me and I sighed and closed my eyes "Hiro I have to go to the bathroom" I said softly my hand in my pocket and the razor gleamed brightly.
I stared in the mirror and sighed and I felt the cold metal press against my skin and the blood fell softly into the sink. I smiled sadly and smiled the razor felt so good against my skin the more I cut the less I noticed how much blood was seeping through
Do you still love me, Do you only see me? If you could see me now would you still love me?
I looked in the mirror and I washed my skin gently feeling the cold refreshing feel of water on my skin. I heard a loud knocking on the door I heard a worried voice of Hiro on the other end
"Shuichi are you ok in there you've being in there for awhile?" he said gently I screamed back I was fine.
I felt myself become dizzy slightly and I stumbled out quickly my razor gleamed in my pocket Hiro smiled at me and I smiled back cutely. My face betrayed nothing to Hiro I was the same Shuichi Shindou not a care in the world.
"Shuichi you look a little pale you should lay down" he uttered quickly I felt my body stumble as my body fell to the ground I felt two warms arms encircle me and I sighed happily I opened my eyes gently "Yuki" I uttered through my hazed mind.
"Shuichi just relax I got ya" he said picking me up gently I felt a warm curtain of hair surround me and keep me safe. I heard his soft voice gently interrupt my thoughts
"What happened to you Shuichi"? He said gently observing my body I felt his breath catch in his throat as he fingered the marks on my arms some of them were scars some were actually messages engraved in my skin. He kissed each scar and wound gently his eyes closed and I saw his tears escape those beautiful eyes.
"Shuichi I'll protect you" the voice said softly and kindly he reached in my pocket and gently found the razor he sighed gently and pulled it out I heard the distant smack of the razor hit the wall and in the garbage.
I felt my body relax gently and his fingers gently stroked my hair, I felt my body give into the pleasure and I sighed happily and I uttered his name "Yuki" I felt the hand stop and push out of my hair and the voice uttered gently and sadly
"Ill never be him to you, I'll never understand why it is when I'm with you I feel at peace, when we talk my body seems to relax, but I'll never be him to you" he said gently stroking my hair and he placed a soft longing kiss on my lips and he stroked my hair one last time.
I'll never be him to you…
What did that strange voice mean I'll never be him to you? I felt a warm blanket surround my body and hot bottle was put on me. It felt so soft and relaxing and my body just eased itself into a peaceful dream land where I was free, warm and happy.
Authors note: so what did you guys think? So our mysterious guy likes Shuichi I'm sure you all know who this guy is? I wonder does Yuki miss Shuichi. Maybe in the next chapter I'll do something from Yuki's P.O.V
So Review to keep my story alive…