Author Note: Oh my god thank you for all the reviews I can't believe I'm getting such a good response to this story, I would love to thank the reviewers I would name them but theirs a lot
Anyway back to the story…
Previously on The Ghost of You: Do you still love me, Do you only see me? If you could see me now would you still love me?
I looked in the mirror and I washed my skin gently feeling the cold refreshing feel of water on my skin. I heard a loud knocking on the door I heard a worried voice of Hiro on the other end
"Shuichi are you ok in there you've being in there for awhile?" he said gently I screamed back I was fine.
I felt myself become dizzy slightly and I stumbled out quickly my razor gleamed in my pocket Hiro smiled at me and I smiled back cutely. My face betrayed nothing to Hiro I was the same Shuichi Shindou not a care in the world.
"Shuichi you look a little pale you should lay down" he uttered quickly I felt my body stumble as my body fell to the ground I felt two warms arms encircle me and I sighed happily I opened my eyes gently "Yuki" I uttered through my hazed mind.
"Shuichi just relax I got ya" he said picking me up gently I felt a warm curtain of hair surround me and keep me safe. I heard his soft voice gently interrupt my thoughts
"What happened to you Shuichi"? He said gently observing my body I felt his breath catch in his throat as he fingered the marks on my arms some of them were scars some were actually messages engraved in my skin. He kissed each scar and wound gently his eyes closed and I saw his tears escape those beautiful eyes.
"Shuichi I'll protect you" the voice said softly and kindly he reached in my pocket and gently found the razor he sighed gently and pulled it out I heard the distant smack of the razor hit the wall and in the garbage.
I felt my body relax gently and his fingers gently stroked my hair, I felt my body give into the pleasure and I sighed happily and I uttered his name "Yuki" I felt the hand stop and push out of my hair and the voice uttered gently and sadly
"Ill never be him to you, I'll never understand why it is when I'm with you I feel at peace, when we talk my body seems to relax, but I'll never be him to you" he said gently stroking my hair and he placed a soft longing kiss on my lips and he stroked my hair one last time.
I'll never be him to you…
What did that strange voice mean I'll never be him to you? I felt a warm blanket surround my body and hot bottle was put on me. It felt so soft and relaxing and my body just eased itself into a peaceful dream land where I was free, warm and happy.
Chapter 3: I have Nothing, You Have Me
Shuichi's P.O.V
The warm air surrounded my soft skin as I looked around and smiled and snuggled further into the blankets and my eyes slowly adjusted to the light of the room I reached into my pocket and gasped
My razor, where's my razor, I hurriedly checked my pockets and breathed heavily it was gone, it was fucking gone. I crawled out of bed and saw a sleeping Hiro laying next to my bed, I smiled sadly he must have stayed here all night that voice the soft caring voice it must have belonged to Hiro.
I'll never be him to you…
What did Hiro mean by that? Did he… no Hiro would never want that? I searched the room quickly my wrists burned with desire and aching need, where was it? I heard a shuffling behind me and noticed Hiro had woken up he smirked at me and moved forward and uttered in a broken tone.
"Shuichi, why, why cut yourself?" I gasped and moved away quickly my arm exposed I moved quickly to cover it and sniffled slightly and moved away. Hiro grabbed my arm and uttered again "Why do you cut yourself?"
My hand slid backwards ready to slap him when he caught my arm and he asked again this time in a calmer voice "why do you cut yourself"? I moved away from him ready to run to the door when he caught my arm and he pushed me to the floor and screamed loudly his eyes bore into mine "Why do you fucking cut yourself"? I felt my hot tears run out of my beautiful violet eyes
"I...I don't know it releases stress and I… feel depressed with my life, no one loves me everyone hates me my parents think I'm a freak because I like men, what do I have to live for? Do you know how it feels to have the one man you love abuse you everyday, call you names, treat you like trash, cheat on you constantly and deny it right to your face, all I do is give and give and I get shit right back maybe cutting is what I need"
I said my head bowed my tears trickling down from my eyes the emotions I felt right now was like a large vine was wrapping itself around my heart and squeezing it very painfully, I couldn't believe I had just openly told Hiro everything. My arms itched for a knife and my head pounded horribly. I needed to get away,
As I got up to go to the door I felt two arms wrap themselves around my waist and hold me close, Hiro I felt his arms hold me tightly and he held me close his breath on my neck.
"Shuichi, I care about you I would never hurt you, don't hurt yourself please, I would do anything to keep you alive, don't resort to that" he said his voice quiet and pleading in my ear,
I pushed him away quickly his eyes filled with shock and hurt, he closed his eyes and a few tears trickled down his face his red hair covering his face. I felt my anger rise "I have nothing don't you understand? All I have is that, all I have is the blade of the knife that makes me bleed and cry".
He stood their and he said softly and quietly I almost didn't catch it
"You have me" he uttered I gasped and pulled back quickly the door in a matter of seconds away all I had to do was open it? So why was I hesitating? He moved toward me and my feet were for some reason planted to the ground.
"Shuichi don't you want me? I'll be their when you need me I'll never leave you" he uttered his lips touching mine gently, I gasped softly and I saw his red hair morph into Yuki's his eyes changed into Yuki's golden eyes and I kissed back my hands sliding over his hair
Yuki…
Our lips danced over each others in a tangled web of passion and deceit, I felt the hot lips of Yuki's claim mine that red hair was now blonde and perfect. Golden eyes locked with violet eyes, and I moaned lowly,
We separated our breaths coming out in pants he smiled and he held me close my eyes were not looking at him they were looking through him and his blonde hair fell over me, my eyes snapped open and I saw red and sighed softly in my mind as he held me
You'll never be him…
Hiro smiled down at me and I looked away "Hiro, this might ruin the friendship? I don't want to hurt you" I said softly looking away how could I be with Hiro? When all I saw was Yuki, he looked at me and pulled me close and uttered in my ear
"Shuichi I'll never leave you" I snuggled into his chest and smiled through my mask "alright lets give it a chance"
All I need is love…
I don't need him…
I'm not looking at you, I'm looking through you
I sighed in his arms and as he held me I cried in my mask I'm sorry Hiro all I see is Yuki I would stay with Hiro for the sake of Hiro so I could have someone who loved me. I climbed out of his arms and kissed him gently and headed to the washroom and looked in the garbage and smiled sadly and happily at the same time
My sweet razor how we meet again.
I moved toward it and placed it on my wrist and sliced and I sighed with pleasure each slice I take will keep me longer with Hiro, it doesn't matter about me I just want to make him happy.
I walked out pretending nothing happened as a trail of blood trailed down my wrist and I cuddled Hiro close to me as we sat in front of the TV holding each other. I closed my eyes and started to fall asleep tomorrow was another day and tomorrow was a new life with Hiro?
I only see him
I stay with you for the sake of you
Authors Note: So Hiro and Shuichi are together? Next chapter Yuki will see them together and how the tempers will flare will Shuichi really stay with Hiro and does Yuki even miss our little Shuichi.
--Don't forget to review to keep my story alive--
Find out next time on the ghost of you.