It was the middle of the afternoon before Elizabeth began to stir. "John…" She muttered, her arm around his waist tightening minutely as her head burrowed deeply into his shoulder.

"Hey, sleepy." John whispered tenderly stroking her tangled hair.

"Mmm…" She freed one hand from the blanket to rub the sleep from her eyes. "Thank you."

"For what?" Puzzled he stopped stroking her hair, but didn't move his hand away.

Elizabeth propped herself up on one elbow, leaning in to softly kiss John. "For everything, for making me feel safe, for…" she kissed him again, "…loving me."

"Always." John closed the distance between them and tenderly claimed her mouth.

Pulling back Elizabeth bit her lower lip nervously, "Shower?"

Immediately understanding that she was afraid of what might happen if she was alone in that environment John climbed out of bed and took her hand, helping her out of the bed. Seeing her sway as she stood up John grasped her elbows to steady her, his eyes wavering with concern. "You ok?"

"Yeah, just a little dizzy and light headed." She answered, winding one arm around his and leaning heavily against him.

"Want me to call Carson?"

"No," panic laced her tone as she recalled the earlier encounter with her friend. "I'll be fine, I probably just got up too fast."

John wasn't entirely convinced, but didn't want to push her on the issue at the moment. He wrapped one arm protectively around her shoulders, watching her carefully as her equilibrium reestablished itself. After a few moments, she nodded again and shifted her hand to rest in the crook of his arm as they moved to the bathroom.

--

Elizabeth sighed softly as the warm water flowed over her easing the tension out of her muscles. Startled slightly her eyes snapped open when she felt a bath sponge touch her shoulder. John stood before her, water streaming down his chest in gentle rivulets, his eyes apologetic and questioning. Smiling reassuringly at him, she nodded for him to continue. Slowly John began to gently wash her body.

Feeling her begin to tense up and shake softly when he started to wash her legs John stopped what he was doing and gently pulled her close whispering soft comforting platitudes attempting to bring her back to the present, out of her memories. Turning the shower off he reached out to grab the towels off the closed toilet seat, wrapping one around her shoulders and the other around his waist. Stepping out of the shower he guided her to sit on the closed toilet seat. Elizabeth was staring blankly ahead, lost in her own world of rampant thought and revelation.

"Look at me Elizabeth." John crouched down in front of her. Frowning when she failed to respond, he gently cradled her jaw in his palm. Her eyes remained fixed over his shoulder. "C'mon," sighing, he gently pulled her to her feet and urged her out of the bathroom over to the bed.

Grabbing a pair of sweats and the warmest sweater he had John tenderly helped Elizabeth dress. Finished, he quickly dressed himself then moved to sit next to Elizabeth. Immediately she moved to rest her head on his shoulder. Wrapping his arms around her John held her close as tears began to silently run down her face.

--

Several hours later Elizabeth slowly woke up cocooned in John's strong embrace. The events that had happened while she and John had been in the shower came flooding back, causing her to close her eyes in regret. She was beginning to get frustrated with having flashbacks; if she couldn't do something as simple as taking a shower without having a flashback, how was she ever going to get back to having a normal life?

Becoming aware of the pounding in her head Elizabeth carefully extracted herself from John's arms and went in search of some aspirin. Finding the first aid kit in the bathroom she grabbed a few packets of single dose aspirin then wandered out to the kitchen to get a glass of water and downed the painkillers.

"You feeling ok?"

Elizabeth startled not expecting to hear John's voice. Turning around she found John sitting up in bed a concerned look on his face. "I thought you were still asleep."

"Light sleeper remember?" He slid off the bed and padded over to her side. Seeing the empty aspirin packets on the counter he frowned, she'd just downed six aspirin - even for the worst headache John usually only needed two maybe three, if he had a concussion.

"Headache." Elizabeth explained gathering up the packets, throwing them away.

"Are you sure that's all it is?" John gently cupped her face with one hand.

Understanding what John was implicating Elizabeth was about to deny it, but hesitated when she saw the raw concern and fear that swirled in John's eyes. Was that all it was, just a headache or was it something more? No. No she wasn't that far gone that she would invite the welcoming embrace of self-annihilation. No.

"I'm sure." She wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek lovingly.

Not entirely as sure about that as she seemed to sound John wrapped his arms around her waist. "You promise you'll let me know if that changes, if things get to be too much for you?"

Seeing his eyes still filled with raw concern and fear Elizabeth tightened her hold on John, "Promise."

--

"If you do not begin to pay attention to where you are going, you are going to end up in the infirmary." Teyla admonished as John once again tripped up on a tree root.

As much as he hated to admit it John had needed a break away from everything that was going on with Elizabeth. He loved her he did, but after spending pretty much every waking moment – and sleeping moment for that matter – with her lately he'd started to get restless. So at the end of that week when it had come time for the weekly supply run to the main land John had jumped at the chance to pilot the jumper. Needing to work off some access energy he'd decided to go for a run and Teyla had tagged along.

Turning over onto his back John propped himself up on his elbows. "Sorry, guess I'm a little more distracted than I thought."

"You are worried about Dr. Weir." Teyla sat down next to John.

Nodding his head John was silent for a moment before speaking, "After everything that she's been through I feel bad leaving her, even if it is just for the afternoon but…"

"You needed to get away for a little while, regain your balance."

"Yeah." He dropped down on his back running his hands over his face. "Does that make me a bad person?"

"No," she placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "You can not be expected to take care of her all the time."

"Maybe so, but somebody's gotta do it since she refuses to look after herself."

"What do you mean?" Maybe John wasn't as blinded by his affection for Elizabeth as she had begun to fear. It was obvious to anyone who cared to look that Elizabeth wasn't doing as well as she'd like everyone to believe.

"She's hardly eating and even with the dietary plan Carson's got her on she's loosing weight." Sighing he pushed himself up into a sitting position. "She won't shower without me there, not that I'm necessarily complaining about that…" He paused scrubbing a frustrated hand through his hair. "But it's not right. Not that anything about this whole thing is right," he added quickly. "I'm afraid I'm gonna lose her. She promised to tell me if things get to be too much, but…"

"You have doubts about whether she will or not."

"It's not that I doubt her or anything. I'm just scared that by the time she realizes it, it will be too late…" He trailed off, lost in his own thoughts. Elizabeth was so fragile – a word John had never thought he would use to describe her – every time he held her he was terrified that he was going to snap her in half. With every embrace he could feel her body slowly slipping away from him. "She's slowly killing herself and doesn't even realize it. And I have no idea what to do to stop it."

--

"This seat taken?"

Looking up from where she was lounging on one of the benches that had been placed on the balcony Elizabeth spotted Carson standing by the door, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"Go for it." Elizabeth shifted over pulling her knees to her chest. Carson sighed as he perched on the end of the bench. "I'm fine if that's why you're here." She continued seeing the worried look in Carson's eyes.

"No, you're not Elizabeth." The hardness of his tone surprised Elizabeth.

As much as she may have wanted to think so Elizabeth wasn't anywhere close to fine. With the amount of weight alone that she'd lost Carson should have had her confined to the infirmary hooked up to an IV - possibly even a feeding tube - long before now. But he'd been willing to give her the benefit of the doubt that she would start eating and get her weight back up; she hadn't and now he was seriously considering hauling her down to the infirmary.

"Carson –."

"No Elizabeth, you're going to listen to me. In the last two months you've lost nearly fifty pounds, pounds that you couldn't afford to lose to begin with."

"Now hold on I haven't –."

"Yes you have and the fact that you don't realize it, is pretty good evidence to me that you are not fine."

Not wanting to listen to what Carson was saying Elizabeth bolted from her seat. She was starting to get sick of everyone treating her like a child; she was a grown woman capable of taking care of herself. Storming through the balcony doors she only made it a few steps down the corridor when suddenly her head began to spin. The last thing she was aware of was Rodney coming down the corridor towards her before everything went black.

Carson sighed in frustration wiping a hand across his face as Elizabeth stormed off. Every fiber of his being was screaming at him to confine her to the infirmary, even if he had to strap her down to a bed to keep her there. It was killing him to see her slowly wasting away. Deciding enough was enough he followed after her, stepping into the corridor he was just in time to see Rodney catch Elizabeth as her legs gave out on her.

Instantly Carson was at her side his fingers instinctively searching out the pulse point on her throat; it was slow but steady. Silently sighing in relief he quickly checked her over for any obvious signs of injury.

"What's wrong? Is she ok?" Rodney's eyes were wide with fear.

"She fainted and I've got a pretty good reason why." Carson gently scooped Elizabeth up in his arms and head for the infirmary. "Woman's bloody determined to drive herself into an early grave." He murmured under his breath as her ribs dug into his chest. Entering the infirmary Carson deposited Elizabeth on one of the beds and deftly hooked her up to vital monitors and an IV.

"Is she gonna be ok?" Rodney hovered closely as Carson worked.

"Honestly I don't know." Carson shrugged slightly, hating how helpless he felt. "It's up to her. There's only so much we can do for her if she doesn't want our help."

"Right." Rodney plopped down in a chair nearby. He hated seeing her like this. Her little fainting spell had just proven that no matter what he or anyone else would like to believe, Elizabeth wasn't getting better. And if he was honest that thought scared the hell out of him.

--

"What do you mean she's in the infirmary? What the hell is she doing there?" John questioned Carson over the radio, as he started towards the infirmary.

When he'd gotten back from the main land John had gone to his quarters to shower and clean up. He hadn't thought much of it when he hadn't found Elizabeth there, figuring she was in her own quarters. So after a quick shower he'd made his way there, not finding her there he'd gotten a bit worried.

She could almost always be found in either hers or his quarters, unless she had an appointment with Kate and the last John knew she didn't that day. Just to be sure he'd radioed Kate and after finding out that she hadn't seen Elizabeth, John had radioed Carson who had informed him that she was in the infirmary.

"She fainted about an hour ago. She was dangerously malnourished I had no choice but to confine her to the infirmary." Carson sighed, flipping his radio off as John came bursting into the infirmary. "She's ok for the moment. She briefly woke up about twenty minutes ago, before falling asleep."

John didn't stop to listen to the last of what Carson was saying, instead heading over to the curtained off area near the back of the room. "Damn it." He muttered at seeing Elizabeth hooked up to medical monitors again.

"Seems kind of wrong doesn't it?" Rodney was still sitting in the chair next to Elizabeth's bed. "It's suppose to be one of us in that bed with her keeping watch over us, not the other way around."

Shoving his hands in his pockets John started pacing around the small area. "When did things start to get so screwed up? I wish things would go back to normal."

"Have things ever really but normal for us around here?"

"Ok you have a point there, but still…"

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

John eased himself onto the bed and sat next to Elizabeth. He soothingly ran a hand through her hair. He smiled as she shifted into his caress and turned her head towards him, her eyes still closed and her breathing still regular.

For the next hour the two friends quietly talked about everything and nothing waiting for Elizabeth to wake up. Carson occasionally wandered over to check on Elizabeth and join in the conversation. Slowly waking up Elizabeth first became aware of the low sound of a hushed conversation, followed by a pounding in her head.

Hearing a soft moan come from Elizabeth, John stopped mid-sentence turning his attention to her. "Hey." His voice was soft and comforting. "How're you feeling?"

Instead of answering verbally Elizabeth rolled over to burrow into John's side, draping an arm over his waist. Smiling softly John comfortingly rubbed her back, while he silently motioned for Rodney to go get Carson.

"How are you feeling?" Carson questioned as approached the bed.

When Elizabeth didn't answer just snuggled in closer to John, he frowned "Hey what'd I tell you about playing nice with the other children?" John softly poked Elizabeth in the shoulder.

Carson sighed inwardly. "Elizabeth I know I'm not your favorite person at the moment, but I just want to help."

Sighing Elizabeth cracked her eyes open slightly and turned her head just enough to look at Carson. "Headache." She mumbled wincing as the infirmary lights hit her eyes.

"Aye I suspected as much." Carson pulled a syringe out of the pocket of his lab coat and administered it's contents into Elizabeth's IV. "There that should help." Nodding slightly Elizabeth rubbed at her eyes wearily before being overtaken by an enormous yawn.

"Sleep." John whispered, his fingers absently combing through her tousled hair.

"Not tired." Elizabeth shook her head repressing another yawn.

"Liar." John teased softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. A tired smile flitted across her lips as she shifted closer to his warmth.

Rodney rolled his eyes as John whispered soothingly to Elizabeth, coaxing her into unconsciousness as she lay securely wrapped in his arms. Snagging the back of Carson's lab coat Rodney headed away from the curtained off area, leaving John to soothe Elizabeth back to sleep.