Joey's Valentine Woes-Part 4
Joey walked dejectedly to his last class, kicking at poor, defenseless pieces of garbage littering the halls of the school. It was finally nearing the end of the day, and he was quickly running out of ideas. Everything he had tried had come to a dead end, the emotionless CEO blocking the way for him. The day's classes had been a long, never-ending parade of failure, and Joey was wondering if it were possible to embarrass himself any further than he had already.
This would be the cue for the ominous movie music of foreshadowing.
Joey took a moment to reflect back on the day's misadventures so far, and wondered what could have possibly gone wrong.
In Literature class, the teacher had suggested that they read famous love poems and Shakespearian sonnets throughout the hour. The poor young teacher was quite surprised – which is an understatement, as she almost went into convulsions of shock - when Joey had offered to read aloud to the class. Every person in the room, excluding Kaiba who was above such things, had turned to stare openly at Joey, as though they were looking at a three-eyed toad or some other impossible creature. It had definitely been a first, as the only contribution Joey ever made to the class was the sound of his loud snores. Taking the stunned silence of his classmates as an opening of opportunity, the blonde had scooted close to the brunette, and began almost purring the sonnets into Kaiba's ear.
The only response he had been able to elicit was a long, loud, and obviously fake yawn. Joey frowned pensively, wondering why Seto wasn't reacting the way he wanted him to. Granted, it was still a response, which was more than half the female population of Domino High had gotten, but definitely not the one he was shooting for.
In Science class, he strolled leisurely up to the Chemistry lab station, sitting himself next to Kaiba, who had been assigned as Joey's lab partner – entirely due to the whimsical chance of fate, and absolutely nothing to do with the tidy sum that he did not bribe the teacher with.
It should be noted, just to be sure that the readers would never question Joey's morals, that the teacher bought that Porsche with her own money, as teachers are paid just so well these days.
As the professor began to lecture on the safety hazards of using the very flammable chemicals and Joey-would-you-please-put-that-down-and-pay-attention-so-you-don't-burn-your-hair-off, the blonde grinned wickedly as he regarded the various glass vials, and his eyes gleamed with a crazed fire. He loudly asked the teacher – read: interrupted in midrant about how Joey was a fire hazard in and of himself - if she knew how to make a love potion, while sending not-so-discreet glances in Kaiba's direction, which all too clearly said I will make you mine if it is the last thing I ever do.
And Kaiba glared his icy glare, which definitely said something along the lines of, If you even try to force something down my throat, I will make sure it is the last thing you ever do. Joey laughed nervously, and turned back to his chemicals, wondering if he could do it anyway.
Meanwhile, all of the female population of the class had decidedly perked up, also looking hopefully at Kaiba. Probably planning the best way to ambush him with their own love potions. The teacher laughed nervously, sensing a mob in the forming, and cautiously backed towards the door, deciding that class would be dismissed early for the day.
Joey deflated a little. How was he going to make a scientifically-proven-to-work love potion without someone who was knowledgeable in scientifically-proven stuff? As he contemplated mixing things at random, just to see if it would work, Kaiba then had to go and whisper in the blonde's ear that a love potion would do him absolutely no good whatsoever.
Joey tried to repress the shiver that ran up his spine, and failed horribly. But what did Kaiba mean by that? No good? Joey was slowly losing hope. The brunette loved him, right?
Right?
Joey dragged his feet sullenly against the tiled floor while trudging to the last class of the day. This was it. His very last chance to get Kaiba to confess his love to him before the school day was out. If he failed yet again, he would spend the whole day wallowing in self pity. Probably with a couple pounds of chocolate and other comfort foods.
He wearily sat down in his Ancient History class, finally beginning to feel the toll of his endeavors, right next to Seto as always. As stated earlier, and for the safety of his legal standing, the seating arrangements had nothing to do with Joey using his life's savings for monetary bribes. Because that would be, y'know, illegal.
The teacher, centering his lesson around Valentine's Day, began to drone on about how the war of Troy had all begun over the love of Helen. While Joey was listening - or pretending to listen, at least - he snuck a shy glance at the brunette beside him, and studied him thoughtfully.
What would it take for Kaiba to confess his love to him? He could understand the CEO being afraid of rejection, which was why he so thoughtfully decided to make it obvious that Joey returned his feelings. His attempts were rather admirable, if he did say so himself. There was only one tiny problem.
Kaiba just didn't seem to be getting any of his hints. He knew Seto was thickheaded, but surely he wasn't this dense. He mentally shrugged. Maybe the brunette just needed a more direct and blatant display of Joey's love.
Joey paused. Yeah. Joey nodded vigorously to himself. Yeah. That would do it. He would just have to make it so obvious that there could be no doubt left in Kaiba's mind. He raised a clenched fist wildly in determination, ignoring the teacher as he asked if Joey had a question. Joey decided that an all-out confession would do, just in case.
Joey's amber eyes lit with his passionate fire once again, and the class suddenly got a feeling of impending doom, though they were not sure why. The blonde quickly clambered on top of his desk, much to the surprise and shock of everyone in the room. He looked down at his classmates with a smile that was borderline to insanity.
A few of them decided that yes, this would be a good time to practice fire drills, and immediately evacuated the building.
The teacher seemed to be dumbfounded at the blonde's outburst, mouth hanging slightly open. After a moment, he seemed to regain his cognitive functions, and stammered that though it was really good for Joey to finally get involved in the lesson for once, he should come down from the desk so they could continue. His words were lost on the blonde, however. Joey only continued to smile - it might have been a slightly unhinged smile, sure, but he does get points for enthusiasm - allowing his gaze to fall upon the brunette man-of-his-dreams.
Joey decidedly ignored the violent twitch that he could see forming in Kaiba's eye. It also should be said that the CEO suddenly did not look happy to be in the blonde's presence. No, instead he was eyeing the window furtively, as if he knew what was coming and was contemplating the exact speed and trajectory needed to make a daring escape from the third-story classroom.
Joey took a big breath. This was it. Time to do or die. Preferably the former, as he would hate to die without having thoroughly ravished the CEO at least once in his young life.
He then loudly announced to the class – and a few neighboring classes, as his voice was just that deafening - that he had a love proclamation that he would like to make, so could everyone please pay attention? Good. Then turned the full force of his attention back to the brunette, who looked more amused and exasperated then annoyed.
Seto lowered his head and gave a prolonged sigh at the blonde's idiotic antics. This really had been a long day.
Joey struck a pose on top of the desk that he had turned into his pedestal. He announced, once again, for the sake of making sure everybody was on the same page, that he would like to announce his love to all who could hear him – which consisted of anyone within five miles of his person.
He began to loudly exclaim he was in love with the bestest person in the whole wide world, but before he could get to the good part, like the name of his affection, he was harshly pulled back down into his seat as Kaiba gave a hard yank on the back of his shirt. Unfortunately for the blonde, he hit his other, previously unharmed shin on the way down from glory.
Joey sniffed dejectedly, ready to bawl at the injustice of it all. Dammit, nothing was going right! As the tears began to form in the corners of his eyes, despite how hard he tried to stop them, Kaiba harshly whispered in his ear for the pup to please shut up, and that he was only embarrassing himself.
Joey turned and looked at the emotionless blue eyes before him, and the tears began to spill over. He quickly got up and ran out of the class before anyone could stop him.
Back in class, Kaiba sighed again and rested his head on one hand, while massaging one of his temples with the other. Things today had not been going as he had planned…
Teary amber eyes burned in frustration as the blonde stalked down the halls. This wasn't fair! Why didn't the brunette love him? He had been so sure that he had. Now it was rather obvious he didn't.
Joey paused in his angry walking, and hung his head a little. No Valentine for him once again. He tried to chuckle at his own feeble joke, but couldn't quite seem to manage it. He glanced down at his watch, and saw that classes would be dismissed shortly. He didn't really want to deal with his classmates asking him if he was alright.
He decided to head home before he would have to face the CEO again. He thought of the night ahead of him, full of sappy love movies and mountains of chocolate to drown out his sorrow, and sighed forlornly.
If nothing else, at least he'd get a nice sugar high tonight.
He stopped in front of his locker to get his things out for the journey home. Might as well do a little homework as he wallowed in self misery. Yugi would be so proud.
Joey looked at the lock, and realized that in his attempts for a confession, he hadn't had a chance to open the locker all day. It was a good thing he never took notes, seeing as his books and paper were still safely tucked away in some remote corner of the locker.
He debated for a moment to leave it in there for the night, partly for laziness' sake, and partly at the thought of having to brave the unorganized horrors of what lie within. Oh what the hell. Tonight couldn't possibly get any worse. He reached for the lock despite himself and entered his combination.
He cried out in frustration as the lock refused to open for him. Would nothing go right for him today?
He felt tears stinging his eyes again, but couldn't be bothered to care as he banged his fist on the metal door, venting his anger at the world. With one last vindictive punch, his locker finally decided to pop open, and he immediately stopped crying.
Peering inside his locker, he discovered that placed neatly atop the cacophony of his books and paper was a single red rose, a folded note, and what suspiciously looked like a dog biscuit.
He slowly looked from one item to the other, not comprehending how they could have ended up inside his locker. He blinked once, twice, and just for good measure a third time. Yep. The mysterious items were still there. Just an anonymous flower, piece of paper, and—
Wait, a dog biscuit! Only one blue-eyed bastard would break into his personal locker – ignoring any and all laws regarding other people's property - and leave something like that in there...
But why? Why go through all the trouble for just a silly little mutt like him?
Five minutes later, he realized that mulling the question over would produce him no sort of logical answer, short of just for the thrill of taunting the poor blonde. But breaking and entering – even though it was just a locker – was a little extreme, even for the CEO. He wondered how to go about confronting Kaiba for some damn answers, when he spotted the neatly folded piece of paper.
He quickly grabbed the note, and nearly ripped it in his haste to get to the secrets it held. His eyes devoured the words obsessively, reading it over once, twice, and a third time just to be sure.
And if Joey had fainted from happiness, well, the readers will just have to understand that it had been a very trying day for him.
The letter was short, and to the point. But Joey wouldn't have had it any other way. In fact, he would later frame the note and claim it as his most prized possession.
He read it one last time, and hugged it to his chest.
Pup-
Dinner, my house. 7:00. Don't be late. Or else.
P.S. The dog biscuit is chocolate. Eat up.
Joey eyes the dog treat suspiciously. It sure looked like a regular old dog treat. It even had Milkbone stamped on it. But if Kaiba said it was chocolate, it would probably be okay.
Joey nervously took a bite out of the dog biscuit, wondering if Kaiba would poison him, or trick him into eating something he bought from the local pet store. Joey smiled as he tasted the sweet chocolate on his tongue. Score!
He glanced back into the locker and reached for the last item. He gingerly held the rose close to his chest. A mile wide grin covered his face. He forgot his bruised nose, eye, face, head, shins, and any other injuries he had sustained in his quest for his One True Love. It had all been worth it.
He was right. Kaiba loved him. He had known it all along.
Some ending notes on how the couple spent the rest of their Valentine's Day, after Joey successfully ditched detention, and Kaiba paid for all damages received by the antique bookshelf (which Joey claimed was entirely Kaiba's fault anyway):
Joey and Seto had a nice, romantic spaghetti dinner, complete with candles and a random violin player in the mansion. Joey attempted, unsuccessfully, to get Kaiba to hand-feed him – to which Kaiba had responded that if he insisted on being a helpless puppy about it, then he might as well eat off the floor. Joey had pouted cutely, and elicited a small smile from the taller teen.
Afterwards, they watched a movie, cuddling on the couch. And sweet, innocent Mokuba most certainly did not exploit this opportunity for personal gain. (The negatives of the pictures he took sold for a record high on ebay.)
Apparently, Seto had blatantly ignored all of Joey's subtle hints (Seto later informed Joey that he was as subtle as a bat to the head, and for future reference to never try anything of the sort again) because he was an arrogant, stubborn bastard who had wanted to confess to Joey in his own way. Joey sighed. Yugi had been right after all.
Some of you may be thinking to youself, 'Gee, this sounds kinda familiar.' That's 'cause it is. I rewrote it, posted it under a new profile (which I am actually deleting soon) and am posting the new and improved version here (on 1/20/09) for your viewing pleasure! If you think you like the improvements, or even have tips for me, please send me a review and let me know! :D Happy V-Days to you all!