Minuet

Entry for speedrent. Sort of angsty, sort of fluffy, sort of sad, sort of happy. Enjoy! Oh, and there's absolutely no reason for the title, except that I was listening to Idina's song of the same name, and...well yeah. Great reason, I know. I do not own Rent.

Oh, and one more thing: I promised my sister, Dancing Namek, to pimp her new forum in my next fic, so here it is: Go look up 'Author Help'! Now with The Do's And Don'ts of writing Musical Theatre Fanfiction, by moi. End shameless plug.

"Y'know, I've noticed you've never really told me about your family."

Collins stared at Angel, snuggled up against him. She was biting her lip, as though she regretted saying anything at all.

"Where did this come from, love?" Collins asked, blinking slightly. She'd never asked about his family before, and with good reason. After she'd told him all about her past struggles, it was obvious any talk of family hurt her.

"My mother died when I was three…I hardly knew her. My sister Anna and me…we only had each other, y'know. My father, he hated me or something. Even before I was…you know." She stares down at her skirt, playing with one of the pleats absent-mindedly. "I was too out-spoken, or something, too hyper for a boy. I hated sports, and I didn't really…believe like he did. I didn't like the church because of their views on homosexuality…and it was one of the things he hated me for.

"I still remember what happened the night I came down in a skirt, in a wig…" Silent tears. He kisses the top of her head. "He…he…pushed me against a wall…" Closes her eyes. More tears. "An' he said…he said… 'Get the hell out, faggot…I don't ever want to see your face here again…I don' want you in this house, defying the Lord with your queer little buddies, making the Virgin cry by imitating Her beauty…Get the fuck out, faggot!"

She's sobbing openly now, and he can do nothing but hold her. "He doesn't know I'm gonna die soon, and he wouldn't care in the least. I'm nothing but his little sinner. I shouldn't have happened. And Anna, my dear, sweet Anna…she…she's a lesbian. She only told me, never our father…I can only hope it stayed that way…I can only hope she didn't tell 'im, cuz I don't think he would have stood for it. Not twice. He…he's not my family, Tom. Anna was. You are…you all are, you and all our friends. Still…I miss my little Anna. And I can only hope the bastard didn't hurt her like he hurt me…" Silence. She doesn't go on, he doesn't force her. He simply holds her and rocks her kissing her tears away, letting her know that she's not alone.

"My family…" Tom sighed, staring into her eyes. "Are you sure…"

"Do you want to tell me?" Angel asked, her eyes wide. She shivered slightly, and Collins grasped her shoulder tighter. Her health had been declining lately, her T-Cells lower than they'd ever been. They could only hope that it was only a minor thing, a temporary thing.

"Well…" He looks up, as though the ceiling had some answer for him. "Where to begin? My dad, he was extremely accepting, always was. I loved him a lot. Mom left him, though, when I was about eleven or so. And took me with her."

"Was that a bad thing?" Angel asked, her eyes saddening slightly. Collins sighed.

"She…she was different than my father, that's for sure. She left him for another man, she married him. It's not that I had a bad relationship with my mom…but I always resented her for leaving my dad. He was a good man, and he loved me and her. But she just packed up her suitcases one day and asked him to sign the papers. My dad wasn't a rich man…my stepfather was, though. Ma told him I'd be more financially stable with her…and he always wanted the best for me."

She held her lover's hand as he spoke, hearing the emotion. "Honey, you don't have to keep going if you don't want to-"

"They moved out of New York soon after, away from my dad. We went to Massachusetts. But I always wanted to come back, and see him again…and eventually, I did."

Angel smiled, holding him tight. Collins however, was tenser than she'd ever seen him before.

"I came to NYU, and met Roger, Mark and Benny. I always wanted to find my dad though…finally, I did a little research and found out my Nan was still living. She was a real sweetie, my Nan…the type who's always happy to see you. I went to her house, and asked about my dad, and…and…"

She held his head to her chest as he cried. He wrapped his arms around her waist as she stroked his neck, cooing sweet words into his ear.

"He…after we left, he got so depressed…he could barely eat, barely sleep. He couldn't stand it, Ang, he started drinking, started gambling…he lost the little he had left, and found himself alone and broken…so he….so he…"

"My sweet baby, you don't have to say if you don't want to…"

"So he took a bullet to the temple in his apartment right before he got evicted!"

Angel held him as close as she possibly could, stroking his neck, the back of his head, his spine. He cried harder than he had in years, letting his feeling out, letting the sadness out.

"I had to get outta New York…I went back to Massachusetts, got a teaching job at MIT. I just…I needed to forget. But sure enough, soon as my Actual Reality theory got out...plus the fact that I'm gay and infected, I was out on my ass. So…I came back home. And that's…" He sat up, staring into her eyes. "That's when I met my Angel."

She smiled weakly, wiping the tears from her lover's eyes.

"Guess we both sort of had shitty starts, huh?"

"No kidding…" he sighed, climbing off her. "Sorry…"

"Don't apologize," She replied, kissing him gently. "You confided in me…thank you."

"You did too…"

Angel kissed him, closing her eyes. "I love you, Tom…I'm so in love with you. You must know that, right?"

"Of course, Angel baby," Collins held her to him, stroking the fake hairs of her wig. "I love you too…and I always will…"

They were silent for a moment.

"But you know…I have a new family now," Collins said finally, snaking his arms around her. She rested her head on his chest, shivering slightly. "You, and all of our friends. You're the only ones I need."

"You're the only one I need," Angel whispered, her eyes closed. "I love everyone, you know, baby…but you're the only one I need. I die without you."

Collins picked her up, turning the lights off and carrying her to the bed. He lay her down, taking off her wig and lying down beside her.

"I die without you, Angel…"

"You'll never have to be without me."

And as they drifted to sleep, Angel shivering despite the blankets and the warmth of her lover's body, Collins was painfully aware of how wrong Angel was too promise 'never'.