Author: Lioness Black
Rating: PG-13/T (language, discussions of drug use and suicide)
Special Thanks: My beta
Disclaimer: Not mine, just good fun.
Mimi sat down on the couch next to Mark and handed him a bottle of cheap wine. "Drink this."
"This?" He peered at the label. "No, this is a terrible wine. I realize that we're dirt poor, but being poor doesn't force us to subject ourselves to bad wine."
She laughed. "If I didn't know better, Mark, I would say that you're gay."
"People have been saying that to me for years, but I never found breasts I didn't like." He smiled. "So, why are you trying to kill me with terrible taste?"
"I wanted to talk to you about something. Something I can't talk to Roger about. Well, I've tried, but he just shuts down if I bring it up. I wanted to know, and who else would have insight but his best friend?"
Mark's brow wrinkled. "Are you trying to get me to betray some kind of trust?"
"It depends. That's sort of why I went with the wine, to get the whole truth and nothing but the truth." Mimi took a big breath. "Tell me about April."
"April?" he repeated, surprised. "What about her?"
"The first time I talked to Roger, he said that my smile reminded him of her and that she died. And that's the last I ever heard about her. I don't know why, but... well, I do. I know Roger... he wasn't always like he is now." She paused. "I've never wanted to know about exes. All it ever does is bring up bad memories, and feelings of resentment, but... she's dead. I can't get jealous over something that's not there anymore."
Mark looked around. "Where is Roger?"
"Asleep."
"Okay. Well... where to start? They met at some concert of Roger's, I don't know where. They went out-"
"Not those kinds of details," Mimi said. "I want to know what they were like together. What he was like with her. And without her."
"Oh...kay. In the beginning, they were great. He was in the band, she was a writer, a poet, actually. You know the writing on the wall there in the kitchen?"
"With the half ass paint job over it? Yeah."
"That's was April's. She got all sorts of crazy ideas in her head, and she pulled Roger along with all of them. He was so fucking in love with her, and she was just as crazy about him." Mark smiled. "They were a great match. They cheated on each other all the time, both of them did it. But they knew it and they were okay with it, as long as they could end up together. Except that Roger - and we weren't as good as friends as we are now, not by a long shot - told me that if I ever fucked her, he'd kill me in my sleep."
Mimi laughed, but it was sort of uncomfortable. "I can't imagine him saying that, especially to you."
"He was a lot rougher around the edges back then. He thought he was the world's biggest badass. He mellowed out and humbled a lot after withdrawal."
"Was it her? Who got him on the drugs?"
Mark paused. "Yes and no. Roger used, recreationally. With the band, after shows, but he never brought drugs here. And it wasn't just April. They got caught up in it together. It's how they... got it."
Mimi nodded. "Yeah, I know about that."
"Yeah. April found out first, I don't know when she got tested or anything, but... she couldn't handle it. I don't know how long she knew she had it, it probably was the same day, we'll never know. God only knows how high she was at the time, freaking out." Mark shuddered. "Before she- she slit her wrists, she left a note, it was short and... terrible. We have AIDS.The next day, after everything was... after she... later, we went down to the clinic and got tested. Roger got tested."
"Who... found her?"
"Uh, it was... it was Roger."
"You're lying to me, Mark. You should know better than to lie, you're terrible at it." Mimi reached out and touched his face. "It was you, wasn't it?"
"I saw her first, Roger was with me, but... yeah, I saw her first."
"Did you ever tell Roger that you were in love with her?"
He looked up, his eyes wide. Mimi smiled.
"You're easy to read."
Mark gave her half a smile. "No, I'd never tell him that. Just like I'd never tell him about how one night when he was out with some other girl, April and I got trashed on this horrible wine, it was cheap and disgusting, and we fucked. That's all it was, a fuck, but... it still meant something.
"It was just me who felt it. It didn't mean a thing to her, I don't even know if she remembered it, we were so drunk. I wouldn't have done it if we hadn't been, and she knew it. But we never talked about it, there wasn't any sense in it. But when Roger was out of the room, I got tested too, just in case. I turned out to be lucky."
"April was pretty special, then, right?"
Mark smiled and nodded. "But, Mimi, she's not you. We were all different people back then, and we're better people now. A lot of that, especially for Roger, is because of you. The drugs and the cheating, and the general asshole he was is all gone. Well, he can still be an asshole."
"Was it hard? Being in love with her and knowing that you couldn't ever have her for real?"
"It was, yeah, but... it's my burden to bear. It's my bad habit." He looked at her and frowned. "I always fall for Roger's girlfriends."
She stared at him for a long moment before clearing her throat. "Maybe I'm not too good at that reading people thing."
Mark leaned over and picked up the bottle of wine. "That's why I can't get drunk with you, Mimi. The last time I did, I did something stupid. I realized that I am that cheap wine. People just want it when they can't get anything else. It's not the real thing, but it'll do in a pinch."
They were quiet until Roger came out of the bedroom. "What's going on?"
"Nothing. Mark and I were just talking about wine." Mimi took the bottle from Mark and held it up.
He took it from her and examined it. "This looks good."
Mark and Mimi's eyes met and she giggled. "See, Mark? There's always someone who's going to like cheap wine."