WARNINGS: AU, Crossover, YAOI, Comedy, Yuna and Rinoa bashing, Selphie and Rikku teaming up, Paine and Fujin getting along, etc, etc.

Disclaimer: I don't own FFX-2 or FF8. This is just some weird little thing I put together for my own amusement and twisted pairings that I love.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Selphie woke to the sight of Trabian tent canvas, thick stuff that kept out much of the cold, and the heavy feeling of a number of blankets. She sat up and looked around. The air smelled cool and crisp, like snow. She knew she was in Trabia without even having to look outside.

She climbed out from under the blankets and found her clothes set out for her, clean and mended, with a new fluffy collared yellow jacket and black leggings to go with her trademark get up. She dressed and stepped out into the crumbled ruins of Trabia Garden and was instantly met with several excited and eager peers.

"Oh, Selphie! I'm so happy to see you up!" one girl started.

"You've been asleep for two and a half days! You must be so hungry. Come on, lets get you some food, and then we'll get you in contact with Balamb. We got a temporary communications tent you can use. They'll be happy to hear from you!"

A little sleep fuzzed and drowsy from so many hours of sleep, Selphie let her self be drag and pulled along for most us the morning. After she had some food in her and some caffeine she was raring to go.

- - -

Zell yawned, still half asleep and rolled over to curl against his pillow and under his nice cozy blankets. He smiled softly, loving the feeling of his bed at home. Wait… bed at home? Why was he at home? He'd been in that castle, fighting that evil bitch of a sorceress…

He sat up with a start and snapped his head around his room. His own room, in his own home, in the town of Balamb. He was home and the smell of his mother's cooking was creeping up the stairs. He stumbled out of bed and to his feet, still wearing his torn and worn clothes. He shot to his door and down the stairs, his mother appearing at the bottom, curious about the loud noises coming from Zell supposedly empty room.

Zell stopped three-quarters of the way down the steps into the living room, eyes locked with his mother's, warm and shaking with tears of joy and relief. Last she had known he was off to save the world with a group of people who couldn't even drink yet. Hyne that was nerve-racking for a mother. And now he was back. He was safe, and he was home.

Without realizing he had moved, the tattooed blonde found himself on the floor of the living room, arms wrapped tightly around his Ma and her arms around her baby boy, neither able to voice how happy they were at that moment.

- - -

Quistis lifted her head from her folded arms. She brought one hand up to brush the sleep out of her eyes and stretched, her spine popping several times from having slept hunched in a chair.

The former instructor looked around her, observing the wood-topped desk with the console in the center, the lines of computers and chairs for students. She was in her classroom. The one she spent too many extra hours in, trying to do too much, which really hadn't turned out too well for her. She frowned as Laguna's words played through her mind. This classroom was the strongest memory she had? The most feeling was in this room? Maybe it had been good for her to lose her instructor's license… that was just… sad.

She got up from her chair and shifted a few more kinks out of her back before dutifully heading to the headmaster's office to see what needed to be done, who was back, if any, and how Xu was doing in charge. Sure, she thought it was a little pathetic to have woken up in her classroom, but she was still Quistis Trepe, and that wasn't going to change.

- - -

A hand lifted to shift his cowboy hat off his face. It fell onto the grass next to him as he sat up and looked around. Irvine was sitting on a grassy hill. Not just any grassy hill, but the one that was just to the right of the Galbadia Garden walkway.

Irvine picked up his hat, putting it on top of his head as he stood and looked around. There was the grass, there was the path, there was no garden though. He groaned, turning in a full circle to see if it was anywhere nearby. With his luck they were probably still stranded on Centra, trying to make repairs after that battle against Balamb.

"Well, ain't that just dandy," Irvine said to himself, a hand coming to rest on his hip. A sigh and a shake of his auburn-haired head before he started down the hill and towards the nearest train station. Better get back to Balamb quick. He had a feeling that's where everyone would be meeting up.

- - -

Fuujin lifted a pale hand to her head. Oh, that had certainly been more than she was expecting. Stupid time compression fucking her mind. She pushed herself into a sitting position, red eye meeting one of green. "FUCKER!" She reached for her shuriken and shoved two of the protruding blue spikes into the Caterchipiller's face. Stupid fucking monster.

"Hey, what you screaming about Fuu, ya know?" Raijin rubbed his temples, sitting up and looking at her. He turned his head in the direction she was pointing to see the fat green bug monster squirming away as quickly as it could.

The albino woman took a moment to look around the area. They were outside Garden, right on the outskirts of the nearest forest.

"Fuu, where are we, ya know? Isn't this Meeting Area Delta?" Raijin asked, looking around himself.

"AFFIRMATIVE. SEIFER?"

"I dunno, Fuu. I don't see him, ya know? Do you think he made it?"

"OF COURSE!" she said, shifting a little closer to him so she could kick him more easily. "IDIOT!"

"Don't go beating him up on my account, Fuu," Seifer's deep voice came from the side as he struggled his way through some brambles. "Fucking bush." He unsheathed Hyperion and gave the poor bush a good thwacking for making his walking more difficult.

"ALIVE!"

"No, Fuu, I'm a ghost. Of course I'm alive. You think some lousy time compression bullshit would take me down?" The tall blonde dropped down to sit with his posse. "Bit dizzy though. You guys?"

"Why are there three of you, ya know?"

Fuujin lifted a brow at Raijin before turning her attention back to Seifer. "NOW?"

"I don't know." Seifer lifted his head towards where the Garden usually stood. "Wait for them to come back."

"We should go into Balamb and get a room, and some food, ya know? What do you think, Seifer?"

"Now that is a good idea. I could use a shower-"

"And then we can go fishing, ya know!"

"CALM!"

"Sorry, ya know?" Raijin said, looking a little sheepish. "I like fishing."

Seifer got to his feet and looked down at his posse. "Well, first thing's first, off to Balamb." He started off without waiting for the others, who quickly got up and followed him.

- - -

"Squall! Squall, where are you going?" Rinoa called after the brunette who had gotten up as soon as he had come back to his senses.

'I'm going this way, because the orphanage is this way, and Cid and Edea are there and they have communication to Garden and that's where I want to go,' Squall thought to himself. "This way."

"Aren't you even going to say "thank you, Rinoa"? Didn't you promise you'd be in the flower field? I think I remember you saying that? Am I wrong?"

'You're annoying. Yes, I promised. Blah, blah, blah.' "Whatever…"

Rinoa came trotting up. "You would have been stuck in that time compression place if I hadn't come! You could have died!"

"I thought you were optimistic…" He didn't shake off her hand that wound around his arm, in hopes that it would be enough to shut her up.

"I am optimistic, but you scared the crap out of me, Squall! I was looking and looking and I couldn't find you anywhere!"

'Guess it won't shut her up…' Squall picked up the pace, seeing the small outline of the orphanage in the distance. After another half hour of walking and exhausting nagging, Squall made it to the front steps. He pushed the door open and stepped inside. "Matron? Cid? Are you here?"

"Squall? Is that you?" A black-haired woman strode through the door from what was once the children's bedroom. "Oh, child, I'm so glad you've made it back. And Rinoa, you as well. How wonderful."

Squall gave a sigh of relief. "Is Cid here? I'd like to arraign transport to Balamb Garden immediately."

A warm smile passed over Edea's lips. "Cid's been all a buzz since time compression dissolved, or for the most part has. He's called the Garden and it's coming down from Fisherman's Horizon to pick him up. Right now he's speaking with Laguna over something-a-rather. I'll go tell him you're here." With that she turned and made her way to wherever Cid was keeping himself busy.

"Do you think everyone else is alright? Do you think they got back? What if they're still trapped in time compression?"

"Rinoa," Edea said gently, appearing through the doorway again. "I am sure they have already returned or will soon. Time compression is difficult to understand. Since past, present and future where all joined, the return for each of you may be slightly different.

"So, we just have to wait."

"Yes, I think so. I have a feeling everyone will migrate back to Garden. We'll take it back to Balamb Island as soon as it's picked us up."

"Are you coming too, Matron?"

"Yes, of course. There is no longer a need for me to distance myself because of the possible threat of possession. Besides, I think it would be useful if I mentored Rinoa with her new powers. She holds many now, and it may prove difficult for her."

"Thank you, Mrs. Kramer," Rinoa said, hidden half behind Squall. "Will they take me back, and but me in that thing? The one Adel was in?"

"Are you going to conquer any nations, dear?"

"Um… no?" Rinoa was a little bewildered at the question.

"Then I don't think that would be necessary. Few people know of the powers you have obtained. I think that keeping a low profile and some intensive training will do nicely."

Rinoa gave a soft smile. She wouldn't have to be away from her lion.

"Garden will be here with the hour, and Laguna is sending a crew to collect the Ragnarok and take it back the Balamb. We'll work out who owns what after everyone's back safe and sound. Squall, good to see you."

"Sir."

"Still a man of few words I see."

"Yes, sir…"

- - -

Gippal let out a rather unmanly yelp as he fell onto his backside, stumbling from his unsteady standing position. Baralai grabbed hold of a nearby tree to stop his fall, and Nooj used his cane to avoid the same fate as Gippal.

"Um, guys?" Gippal asked looking around. "I don't think we're in the farplane anymore."

Nooj walked up to a bush and poked at it with his staff. "We were a moment ago. Where are we? Baralai?"

"How should I know? I don't know anymore that either of you."

Gippal got to his feet and brushed the dust off his butt. "Well, let's go."

"You don't even know where we are, but you propose we go somewhere already?" Nooj asked, giving the Al Bhed a skeptical look.

"Hey, you know what they say about forests."

"You can only walk into a forest halfway then you're walking out?"

"Bingo, Mr. Praetor. Once we get out of this forest, we'll at least be able to get a better view." Gippal gave them a thumbs up.

"Fine. Then we go this way." Nooj turned and started heading off in the direction he had chosen.

"Why that way, Nooj?" Baralai asked curiously.

"I heard a whistle."

- - -

"Look out!" Paine called as both Rikku and Yuna nearly toppled to the ground. She slung an arm under each of their's but she only managed to keep Yuna up.

"Owwie," Rikku whined, cringing and rubbing her butt.

"Oh!" Yuna gasped as she opened her eyes. Everything was bright and blue and the walkway beneath her feet was translucent. "Where are we?"

Rikku's head shot about as she took in the surroundings. She jumped to her feet and pawed at the air. "Zanarkand?"

"No," Paine said flatly.

"How do you know?" Yuna asked having thought it might be Zanarkand as well, despite how far fetched that was.

"Because that sign says 'Esthar Shopping District'."

"Esthar?" Yuna repeated looked to Rikku. "Have you ever heard of a place called Esthar?"

"Nuh-uh," the blonde replied. "And look at it! It's huge and high-tech! We'd totally know about this place!"

"But none of us do."

Yuna looked down at her feet, hands clasped behind her back as she contemplated. "Paine's right. We don't. So you know what that means?" She lifted her head, grin in place.

"Explore?" Rikku asked excitedly.

"Right!"

- - -

"Ooph! Isaaru, what where you're going!"

"Me? It's all your fault. You watch were you're going, Maroda!"

"You fell into me!"

"You walked into me!"

"Excuse me," a fluid male voice came from about stomach level on the two men. "The both of you jumped to the side when that machina went by and ran into each other."

Isaaru and Maroda blinked confusedly at the Al Bhed boy. "Who are you?"

"My name is Benzo, it is a pleasure to meet you, Isaaru, former summoner, and Maroda of the youth league, former guardian."

The two brothers looked at each other and then back at the boy. "Well, hello Benzo," Isaaru said then looked around. "Uh, where are we?"

"I was just going to ask the same thing," Maroda added.

"I don't know. I've only left the desert once, when Home was destroyed, and a little while ago when I was passing the Moonflow."

"So, none of us know where we are…"

"Doesn't look like it." Maroda patted Isaaru on the back.