Disclaimer: I own nothing.

So it's like this: Remus is dead, right? "Hermione" just totally stabbed him, hmm? And how the hell does Fred know Bella, you're wondering? Also, you're probably thinking 'Dude! Where's the real Hermione! And what about George!' All these questions and more are about to be answered.

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/Murder Scene/

Tonks backed away from Fred, "What the hell is going on! You know her!" Fred looked over at Neville and Draco, "They introduced me to her! They said she'd help me! It was for you, baby, and… I never meant for it to end like this…" Neville blinked, "H-he's right… Draco thought, even if I opposed to it, that he should have her aid…"

Ron and Harry came out of the broom closet, looking quite disheveled, "Bloody hell…! Where the hell is the real 'mione!" A somewhat distraught-looking Bellatrix came from deep within the crowd, "I'm right here! What the hell is going on!" George appeared behind her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She looked down at the body on the floor, "No! He was going to… propose tonight… He said it was time he came forward and announced us as a couple…" She looked at the ring on her finger and so did all of the others. Tonks' eyes widened, "Her ring's better than mine! This is bloody ridiculous! He deserved what he got!" She stormed off.

The second Bella slowly began to transfigure into Hermione, "George, that's the LAST time I let you take me out 'for a couple drinks'." She said, kneeling down next to the corpse and sobbing heavily.

/Fred and Tonks/

She stood out on the balcony, crying. Fred came up behind her, "I'm so sorry… This wasn't my intention at all…" He held her in his arms gently, letting her cry into his shoulder. She shook her head, "I'm not upset with you, Fred. I'm angry at myself for not knowing. I always know everything. This… this was so obvious… the long 'business meetings' at night… the frequent trips to Hogsmeade… I should've known!"

Fred shook his head, "No, you couldn't have known… It's not your fault, babe…" She pushed him away, "But it IS! I could've ended it earlier… I could've prevented this…"

/Draco and Neville/

Draco looked at Neville, "We should…" Neville nodded, "Definitely… Call the toast before this gets too far…" Draco kissed Neville, "Alright." Neville smirked, "I'll let them ruin themselves- they seem so good at it."

/Hermione and George/

Hermione pushed him away, "You… You're such an ass! I hate you! Get away from me!" George grabbed her and pulled her into a tight embrace, "Just shut up and hear me out, okay? I didn't just do this for Fred… I… did it for you… I didn't want to lose you to him and… I knew Ron would cut it off once he found out… I… I was selfish… Please forgive me…"

Hermione laughed, "You're a disgusting freak! You killed my fiancée… Well, nearly so… How would this make me want you! Get your hands off of me, please! Your lies and charm won't work on me! Go back to that slutty Angelina!" She took a glass, looking at George, "To no-good, lousy meddlers who don't know when to stop being assholes!" George raised his glass, "To smartass know-it-alls that don't know love until it bites the in the ass!"

And that was the end for them.

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Who else will drink? Will anybody survive? Or will they fall victim to themselves?