NOTE: Here's the next chap. Let it not be too sad.

Chapter 17: James' Loss

Hermione entered the almost empty common room on a Saturday afternoon. The dreaded final year exam was in 4 months and unusually, it was not just her who was worried about it. She smiled to herself as she remembered Harry and Ron desperately trying to master non-verbal spells the last few days. Let's just say they weren't very, very successful. She sat down in one of the room's warmest couch (the ones in front of the fire) and opened her bag. She took out a red diary she had been keeping in her bag for a few days. She had been contemplating lately whether she should show Harry his mother's diary. It was a hard decision. Ron wasn't much help since he wouldn't give her any advice. So much for best friends. Yet, Ron's reason for not helping seemed very rational. It was neither hers nor his decision whether Harry deserves the book or not: it was the diary's. So, that was exactly what she was going to do. She was going to read one or two more of Lily's entries and see if it was right for her to give it to Harry…after all, things were turning better for Lily and James.

April 14

Dear Diary,

My handwriting is not steady, I couldn't keep it steady. I don't know if I should write it down, but I couldn't keep all my feelings cooped up inside. Something terrible has happened, not to me, but to someone else. Yet, I still feel devastated. Perhaps I should start from the beginning, to get the heavy sympathy, guilt and unhelpfulness off my chest.

Hermione froze, 'Oh no, this does not sound good.'

It's very late now, I think 3 o'clock. Yet, I couldn't sleep, so I decided to write this. It was around 11 P.M; James and I were taking our last round in our daily corridor patrols. We have to patrol until midnight during Fridays and weekends since the security had soared. We were passing the gargoyle which guarded the entrance to the Headmaster's office when we saw Professor McGonagall white faced standing next to it. We greeted her warmly but her face was full of anxiety and fear.

"Oh, Ms. Evans, Mr. Potter, I've been waiting for you to pass this place." It was weird for her to say. Then he looked at James, "Mr. Potter, the headmaster wants to see you about an urgent matter. Ms. Evans I suggest you wait here or head straight to the common room. Your patrol ends here." It was quite surprising. James and I exchanged astounded looks, but without question, he went with Professor McGonagall to Dumbledore's office. Meanwhile, I decided to wait. I don't know if it was a mistake to do so, but all I know is that it could have saved me from knowing a very bad news quickly…which, unfortunately, happened to a friend. After what seemed like hours of waiting, the gargoyle leaped out of place. Descending slowly from the staircase was James. He didn't look well, I'm telling you.

"James, what did the—" I stopped immediately and scanned him. There was a shocked, desolate and angry expression displayed on his paper white face.

"James? What's wrong?" I asked dreading what's coming. He was clutching a piece of parchment that looked as though it had been held in shaking hands. He looked at me with a despaired expression.

"It's not possible," he muttered, his voice quivering and hoarse. He crumpled the piece of paper in his hand and threw it on the floor. With that, he dashed from me towards the direction leading to the common room. He was so fast there was no point in stopping him. I wondered what made him so upset, so I picked up the parchment. What it contained took all the blood from my face. It was from an uncle of his and its contents were not all good. It was terrible. His father was an Auror and it seemed that he was attacked when he, his wife and youngest son were sleeping. Other Auror families were attacked too apart from the Potters. According to the letter, there was a struggle, but none of the Potters survived. James had lost his family all in one night.

When I reached the common room, I saw James sitting on one of the couches in front of the fire. I approached him slowly and sat next to him. It was going to be hard comforting him. I remembered his parents and brother. Even if you don't know them, you'll realize that they are nice and cheerful people. That was the saddest thing about James' loss.

"James, I'm so sorry. I read the…"

"The letter. It's alright, it's not your fault. It's His." There was so much pain and spite, it didn't sound like the James Potter I know.

His expression was blank but his eyes showed his true emotion, "I'm going to kill him." That was the first bad sign coming from James. "Whoever this Voldemort is, he's not going to live for much longer. I'll kill him." You should have seen him, he was frightening. James had always been carefree, mischievous and happy. Even with Snape, I've never heard such hatred.

"You will do no such thing. He's a powerful and dark wizard, James. You're just upset, that's all. So don't think about doing revenge against this wizard, Potter. He'll kill you too without regret."

"I don't care what he does to me! I'll kill him for what he did!"

"Revenge would lead you to nothing!"

"HE KILLED MY FAMILY!"

"YOU CAN'T SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE LIKE THAT!"

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!"

"Maybe I don't, but I do know that your parents would not want their only living son to become an idiot and an attempted murderer! THEY WOULDN'T WANT YOU TO DIE, JAMES!" We glared at each other for a minute before what I said knocked some sense into him. He stared at me panting slightly. He was angry, although I know that what just took place in his life was unbearable.

He sank back down on the couch. "You know when I was young, my parents and I, together with ever annoying little Michael, would sit in front of the fire and just talk. Like this. We'd do nothing but talk. It's stupid and childish, I know, but it was and will always be my favorite way of passing the time." I thought it was neither stupid nor childish. I felt great sympathy for him. I never really lost a very close family member, but I did lose Petunia when I found out that I was a witch. My only sister turned into a hag from that moment on. Imagine how much it hurts to lose the people you love the most in just one instant? It's an unexplainable horror.

He buried his face in his hands, silent sobs shaking his whole body. I put my hand on his shoulder in a comforting manner.

"James, I'm so sorry," I whispered. I didn't know what to do. He raised his face from his hands, tears slowly pouring down his face. For the first time in my life, I saw all the liveliness from those hazel eyes was extinguished.

I couldn't bear to see him like that. So I did something I never thought I'd do (which I know shocked him greatly too). I went forward and wrapped my arms around him in a comforting embrace. James sobbed hard on my shoulder, something I never thought James Potter, Head Boy and Marauder, would do. Empathy took over me and I felt hot tear trickling down my cheek.

"Everything will be alright," I told him. Let's just hope it would be, but with times like these, everything is unpredictable.

I couldn't bear to write anymore.

Lily

Hermione closed the diary on Lily's shaky writing.. She couldn't give this to Harry…not yet. Harry's life now was still a bit troublesome, with the Dark Lord slowly gaining power again. One day she'll have the courage to give it to Harry.

Note: I hope you like it. Is there too much drama? I'm not very good at drama, but I hope you like it. Please review! Have a nice day everyone.