Being a Mom
By, The Angels of Death
Summary: Nejiten! Tenten must learn to give up her dreams of becoming the next Tsunade, and become a STAY-AT-HOME MOM! But first, she must become accustomed to her new lifestyle: TEACHER!
Pairing: Nejiten
Oh yes. I'm back. ;D
Chapter 8: Going Back?
Tenten sat up from the floor tiredly. Eiji turned around to look at his mom curiously.
"Mom, are you okay?"
Tenten rubbed her eyes, looked at him, and burst out in tears.
'He's wearing pink. He's wearing pink. MY SON IS A TRANSVESTITE!'
Eiji raised an eyebrow, before turning back to the mirror.
'Ooh, I know I look good.'
Neji grumbled a little, regaining consciousness. His eyebrows furrowed, as he refused to open his eyes.
'I fainted because I saw MY son in my wife's pink training outfit. Now, when I open my eyes, I want to see him as a NORMAL man. Or a flying cow. Either one's okay.'
Neji opened his eyes, and took in his surroundings. His wife sat near him, bawling her heart out, and his son posed in front of the mirror…in THAT.
The SAME training outfit that his WIFE had worn. The SAME training outfit that he had found to be quite cute, and had drawn his attention towards Tenten. The SAME training outfit that he had…well. Let's not get INTO description, now.
But the situation was…his son…was a TRANSVESTITE.
And he had to take action.
'But…how the heck am I going to do this. How can I handle a situation like this? Who can I look to for guidance?'
Only one person.
"You want me to WHAT?"
"Well…your daughter. She's…a bit MANLY for her…case. Um…I just wanted to know…HOW you got her to be like that."
"Neji, are you saying that it's my fault that my DAUGHTER is a TOMBOY?"
"No, no! Kiba, you've got the wrong idea!"
"Then what OTHER idea is there?"
"…………………………"
"…………………………"
"…Okay. Forget I said anything."
"Okay. Good."
"…Are you SURE you can't give me any clues?"
"NEJI!"
"Right, right. Sorry."
Neji sighed, entering his home tiredly. He found Tenten sitting at the kitchen table, staring at her coffee quietly.
"…Tenten?"
No answer.
Neji walked over and grabbed her coffee, sipping it slowly.
It was cold.
"Tenten?"
He waved his hand in front of her face. He poked her. CONSTANTLY. He kicked her foot. He stepped on her foot. He snapped his fingers in front of her face. He screamed in her ears. He slapped her. Numerous times. Even up to the point of slamming her face, smack down on the kitchen table.
No reaction at all.
Neji sighed, and pulled a chair next to his spaced out wife, who held a few bruises. He turned to look out the window, and saw Lee. Right there. His face holding an expression of GREAT shock.
"N-N-N-Neji! D-Did you j-j-just…ABUSE YOUR WIFE?"
"No! Lee, wait. There's a simple explanation-…"
"OH MY KAMI-SAMA! HYUUGA NEJI JUST USED DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! AAAAAAAAAAAAAH! OH MY KAMI-SAMA! GET HELP! TENTEN IS ENDANGERED! CHILD SERVICES! SAVE EIJI! OH MY KAMI-SAMA! I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT-…"
Lee fell to the floor, hyperventilating. Neji sighed even more, and rubbed his temples tiredly.
His son was a transsexual.
His wife wouldn't budge.
His FRIENDS were losers.
And he had no life.
What now?
Gai dropped in to say hello.
Oh GOD.
"Neji! I came to drop by to say hello and-…"
Neji wanted to DIE. Because he knew what was going to happen.
"Is that TENTEN? Is she bruised? What is that Neji? What happened? Did you use DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! OH MY KAMI-SAMA! MY STUDENT! USED DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! WITH MY OTHER STUDENT! OH MY KAMI-SAMA!"
Gai leaned against the open window to keep from fainting. A low call was made.
"Gai-sensei…"
Yup. Neji wanted to DIE. Because he knew what was going to happen next.
"Am I hearing things? Or was that Lee-…"
Gai stopped in mid-sentence, as he turned around and peered out the window, to see Lee sprawled on the floor, trying to get up in vain.
"………………………………"
"………………………………"
"OH MY KAMI-SAMA! NEJI HAS DESTROYED THE WHOLE TEAM! AAAAAH! AAAAAAH! OH MY KAMI-SAMA! WHY? WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?"
And Gai DID fall to the floor, unconscious.
Neji sighed.
"What is this? Is there some kind of chloroform spell in this house? Everyone's fainted in this house."
Neji and Tenten sat together in bed, in continued silence.
"……………………………"
"……………………………"
"…Neji…I need to get OUT of here."
"…What are you saying? Are you-…are you…breaking up with me?"
Neji choked, and started breathing shallowly.
"What? Neji, NO! It's just- OH MY GOD. You're hyperventilating!"
Tenten looked around, and grabbed a paper bag, holding it up for Neji to breathe in.
When Neji was finally breathing normally, he sighed.
"We've got some serious problems-wait. Tenten. Where did you get a paper bag?"
"…A mother is always prepared."
"……Wow."
"…Yeah, I know."
"Well…a father is always there to be cool…and slick."
"…You lie. And you know it."
Neji gasped and bit on his fist.
"How…how did you KNOW?"
"…A mother always knows."
"Why do chicks always get the good sayings?"
"We'll never know…"
"…………………………"
"…………………………"
"…………………………"
"…So ANYWAYS. As I was saying. I need to get OUT of here. I need to DO something to keep my mind away from my ISSUES."
"But how?"
"……Teaching."
TBC…
GASP. Tenten? Back in teaching? What chaos can become of this TRAGEDY! Only one way to find out! Stay tuned…for the NEXT episode of…Being a Mom.
…XD Jk.
Please review! It keeps me energized. Like…soda. And…sugar. XD
- The Angels of Death :D