A/N: Well thanks for the couple of positive reviews I've had since I put up the second chapter. Please include suggestions if you have any!
Disclaimer: If I owned these characters I'd have made them into an original fiction, not a fanfiction. I bought some really cute shoes yesterday, but that's irrelevamt.
Dear Hermione,
Your Mum, she just replied to my letter.
Her note was stained with tears, but they're nothing to what I've shed. But it can't be true! Surely.
YOU CAN'T BE DEAD!
They thought I was dead. Even you thought I was dead, and you're smartest girl I've ever met. So you have to be alive! You have to!
But the feeling of emptiness inside me tells me otherwise.
That letter...
I can't stop myself from thinking of you in wherever comes after this, looking for me, trying to find me, find my love, and finding... nothing.
You must be so lonely...
Oh I'm so alone now! I want to be with you! I need you, Hermione! You can't be gone, my darling, my angel, you can't! Why you? You're so perfect, so great, you didn't deserve this!
Oh I'm so sorry!
I just wanna be with you! I want to put a finger on your lips and trace that sweet smile you used to have when you looked at me!
I can't believe I'll never see that again!
Every time I look at your photo I break down in tears! It makes me sick, thinking of what I've done...
You're so perfect! Holding you, I was complete... My life was perfect, I had you!
What was it like, Hermione? What is it like now? How does it feel to be there, without me? How does it feel to be alone?
I don't need to ask. I feel it too.
I can't be bothered living anymore. But I can't die either, I don't have the courage for that. I ended your life! I know you'll never forgive me. I can't face you, on earth or whatever happens next. What can I do?
My life is worthless. There's nothing more to say.
Love from the man who killed you,
Fred Weasley.
Hermione!
I know you can't read these but it helps to write them down...
Your mother, she just sent through a copy of the letter. The one you wrote before you died. The one where you said you were going to be with me.
I know what I have to do now!
Being alive is nothing more than breathing now, and my heart is beating but there's nobody here to press their head against my chest, hear it and smile up at me like you used to.
I love you so much! Now I'm going to come and find you. I have to!
I'm such a coward. I can't do it! But I have to.
This is for you, Hermione. I want to hold you against me again. I thought I'd lost you forever but I know a way to get back the best thing that ever happened to me. You're amazing honey. I can't wait to see you.
Your soul is so beautiful, just like your body. And I'm coming to be with you!
It's so bittersweet. Leaving behind everyone I've ever cared about. Except for you.
I want to explain to everyone but there's nothing to say. Your letter covers everything, really.
See you soon, honey! I love you!
I can't wait to be with you.
I've lost every reason to live and you're my reason to die, so that's all I need know really.
Oh what am I saying? I can't!
I'm trying but nothing can put that knife near my wrist, not even you. I'm a coward. I'm sorry.
I want to die so much! Why can't I! WHY!
I love you sweety. Forgive me?
Love,
Fred.
To the Best Girl Ever,
So that's it. I'm here alone. And it's my own fault.
Youre dead and I'm alive and both of those are my fault.
I must be the most pathetic human being in the world. I can't even end my own life to be with you.
You're everything to me, Hermione. I feel like my life really only started when I fell in love with you.
I'm sitting in a cafe writing this. And people everywhere ar ejust living their lives. How can they keep on living? How can the world keep turning? You're not here to make it okay! I can't feel your love. Where are you, Hermione!
Where are you?
I guess I finally realised how insignificant I really am. How unimportant we all are, in the end.
When I die, maybe ten people might shed a few tears, but the rest of the world will just keep going. They'll keep eating and sleeping and breathing. They'll keep making war, making cakes, making love, making babies...
Why am I even here if I matter so little? I'm just a coincidence of fate, really. One of many thousands of eggs met one of countless millions of sperm and they made me. Not a miracle, like the religious Muggle people say. Just a mistake.
If only I could go back. I wouldn't take that potion. In fact, I wouldn't even have met you! If only I could take it back to when I was in the womb. If only I could destroy myself then. You'd find somebody so much better to love. Someone you could be happy with.
Soulmates don't exist, not really. They're just an illusion to fool you into thinking that you're meant for something bigger than just living and breathig and eating and dying. You could have been happy with anyone, if you hadn't got together with me.
Perhaps you became the one person I could be happy with, but if I hadn't met you, I wouldn't have known that. It's not true, all of that stuff about only one person vcan fill the void.
You know, I wouldn't want to destroy myself. I wouldn't want to cease to exist. I'm scared!
I'd just... be placed in Slytherin! Then we would never have been friends or like each other. We wouldn't have kissed and made each other the happiest people in the world. And we wouldn't have missed it, not when we never knew it.
I wonder if I could do that, now... I wonder if I could get my hands on a time turner...
I have to do it.
When next we meet, I won't be
Your Fred.