Author's Note – Thank you for taking the time to read this story. I once again acknowledge the generosity of my friend "Lady Viva" in allowing me to use Margo Marin - Scott's special love from her story "What is Now and What Should Never Be" in the course of this Chapter. Margo is an exciting and captivating character and writing Scott's love for her in the course of my own humble words is really rather interesting. …mcj
Possessions – Chapter 4
THE NIGHTMARE FROM HELL - PART ONE
"REALITY CALLS"
The scene of the Mexican disaster was horrific and it briefly crossed his mind that next time International Rescue got the call; Scott could keep his precious job of Field Commander very much to himself.
"Oh Jesus." he breathed bringing the imposing silver Thunderbird in for a closer look at the devastation. "Where the hell do we start?"
Visibly shaken, he turned his head back in the direction of the communications. He couldn't help but notice his hand was trembling a little on the controls.
"Thunderbird One to Base" he began, trying his best not to sound rattled.
He soon began to understand not being rattled was easier said than done.
John Tracy was painfully aware of the shoes he was required to fill and in all the rescues he had co-ordinated from Thunderbird Five, not once had he ever heard Scott sound even the remotest bit rattled. Ice cool under pressure, he guessed for Scott it all but came with the territory, or, as Gordon had so bluntly put it a few hours earlier, "his ability to make a pretty good call in a crisis."
John tried his best not to scowl. He thought the world of his brother but overhearing Virgil and Gordon's conversation in the hangar of Thunderbird Two had really made him burn.
The commanding voice took his mind off his discontent by immediately sounding in return.
"This is base to Thunderbird One. Go ahead John."
John breathed a sigh of relief. At least his Father sounded like things had settled down at home and International Rescue was back to "business as usual."
"I've arrived at the danger zone Father." he began with his normal brisk efficiency. "Virgil radioed me earlier. He said he's twenty two minutes behind me."
"FAB son." the voice acknowledged. "How are things looking over there?"
John scanned the mountainside both above and below him and tried to find the words to reply. Fading light and driving rain almost blinded his vision but the devastation he was still able to witness from where he hovered made him feel almost physically sick.
"Bad Sir." he finally responded.
His scowl soon returned when he heard Scott's powerful voice in the background demanding to know what the hell "bad" was supposed to mean.
"You can be such a pain in the ass sometimes." he muttered quietly under his breath. "What the heck do you think it means?"
He sat bolt upright in front of the controls and forced himself to go in closer. He had to make a more accurate assessment of the situation before Virgil and Gordon arrived with the equipment and he wanted to make sure he did so before he received any further "words of wisdom" from Scott.
"Father I'm assessing things now." he reported, his face a study of intensity. "The western side is still unstable and from what I can see from here, the whole of the southern side is gone."
He listened carefully as Tin-Tin explained that from the information she had, the southern side wasn't the area where they needed to concentrate their efforts.
"The likelihood of anyone surviving the land-fall on that side of the mountain is absolutely minimal John. "she stated, her gentle voice devoid of any emotion. "The western rock-face has a superior geographical formation and there's a very good chance we'll still find survivors under there."
"OK thanks Tin-Tin." he said, wearily planning the recovery of muddied, broken bodies in his head.
He paused for a moment to settle himself down. He just didn't understand the human race sometimes. How so many people had been permitted to construct their homes on such a clearly unstable formation was beyond all reasonable comprehension. It simply didn't make sense.
"Putting innocent people at risk to make a quick buck. It isn't damn well humane." he muttered peering at the destruction once more and ignoring the nausea building up in the pit of his stomach. "Those poor bastards under there didn't stand a chance."
Despite the unsteadiness in his gut, he continued to manoeuvre Thunderbird One around the mountainside.
"The rest of the outcrop seems fairly intact Father. "he observed.
His composure returned as he carefully assessed the terrain.
"If I can find somewhere level, I'm confident both the "Birds" can land."
The reply he received was instantaneous and not from the lips of his Father. No sooner had he spoken than a worried bellow echoed through the communications and right throughout the cabin of Thunderbird One.
"John!" Scott almost shouted, his voice reeking with alarm and absolute panic. "DO NOT … I repeat … DO NOT land down there without clearance."
The inside corners of John's blonde eyebrows knitted. Scott was really starting to push his luck now. Just how did he figure International Rescue was going to rescue anyone buried under rubble for six hours if he didn't take the ultimate risk and land?
"I thought you were supposed to be in bed." he commented in his own matter-of fact Tracy tone.
"I am John." Scott replied coldly, clearly not appreciating the response. "But a man doesn't sleep too well when he knows his little brothers are out there without him, especially when the one who's been placed in charge wants to start doing crazy, stupid things like that. "
John's hackles rose. He was still smarting over Scott's outburst when his Father stood him down from command and Virgil hadn't made things any better either by failing to turn off the communications before he and Gordon had decided to discuss his ability to do so in the cockpit of Thunderbird Two.
"It's not crazy." he heard himself snap. "I haveto land down there if we're gonna do anything to help and if I don't do something fast we may as well have stayed at home with you."
He moistened his lips with a gritty, determined tongue.
"Look I understand where you're coming from Scott but I'm not in the third grade anymore. I know for a fact if you were seeing what I'm seeing at the moment you'd have landed ten minutes ago."
"That may well be son." interrupted the third and most powerful voice of all. "But your brother has a point. The stability of the area isn't something any of us should be taking for granted at the moment."
John opened his mouth to argue but he wasn't given the chance.
"This Organisation is about saving lives John, not about losing your own." Jeff Tracy reminded him firmly. "I want you to stand by until Alan runs you some data on the area and then and only then are you to go down."
"FAB Sir." John grumbled, accepting the subtle admonishment as graciously as he could. It was almost like his Father thought he was Alan. Alan was always being warned for being far too eager to put himself in the firing line, most of the time, without giving any thought to the consequences. He'd lost count of the number of times their Father expressed the need for caution whenever Alan became involved.
His eyes rolled.
Well he was no Alan and for the life of him he didn't know why he had to be subjected to the same.
The grumbling continued as he stood by on Thunderbird Five's frequency waiting to receive the clearance.
"International Rescue's Field Commander." he spat, jabbing sullenly at the controls. "Sure I am …can't even make a decision to land without somebody granting me permission."
The seconds ticked by and so did the extent of his patience.
"Damn it Alan. What's holding things up?" he snapped forgetting every word could be heard by his equally impatient baby brother.
"Chill out will you." Alan protested from Thunderbird Five. "It's not like I'm some sort of geophysicist or anything."
"I don't expect you to be Al." John flashed back, suddenly sounding surprisingly like Scott did in a crisis. "All I want you to do is tell me if the data you've got indicates it's safe for me to land."
"I'm running it." Alan griped in return. "Gees John, give me a chance will you? Dad only asked me to do it for you half a second ago."
John grasped the back of his neck with a sweaty, frustrated hand. If he would have been on duty in Thunderbird Five he would have run the data an hour ago, purely as a matter of course.
"You should have all information on hand at all times Alan. I keep telling you …"
Now it was Alan's turn to be abrupt.
"Save the lecture for someone who needs it John ... the data says you're clear to land." he interrupted after quickly viewing the printouts.
John frowned sensing the tone of discontent.
"Boy what the hell's eating you?"
"ME?" Alan shot back. "I think you should play One's flight recorder back a couple of times and ask yourself the same question John."
John flinched. The remark stung and came a little too close to the core for comfort.
"Maybe I will when I have a little more time on my hands Alan." he replied, ending the spat with his usual dismissive dryness. "At the moment I've got more important things to do."
Carefully manipulating the controls of Thunderbird One he returned his attention to the mountainside. "Stand by Thunderbird Five. I'm taking her down now."
The arrival of International Rescue was heralded by a near perfect landing but John Tracy still paused momentarily at the controls after detecting what he thought was a tremor.
"Thunderbird One in ten thousand pieces." he scoffed to himself. "Yeah Johnny T that'd really top things off."
He continued to sit at the controls debating whether he should leave the craft. He didn't want to push things with Alan but boy he sure hoped he was right about the stability of the rock face.
Alan's comments periodically ricocheted through his head.
John sighed. The kid was right when he said he had something eating him.
He had something eating him all right.
Big time.
He hadn't appreciated the comments about his ability to take command, particularly the one he'd had to stomach earlier that morning standing in the lounge room next to Scott.
So Scott thought he was the only one who had given up everything for International Rescue did he? That insinuation alone demonstrated he wasn't thinking straight at the moment.
"Anyone would think the rest of us were just sitting by the telephone, bags packed, waiting for Dad to call." he thought to himself sarcastically. "None of us had lives Scott. None of us had dreams. We didn't have women in our bed either. All we wanted to do was give everything up and come back to the middle of nowhere to live and work for our Father."
"And …" he reflected, "...as I recall, the only reason I agreed to give it all up in the first place was because Virgil convinced me Dad was doing it for Mom."
"Sardonic ass." he berated himself. "You're spending far too much time in that space station Johnny."
Still, he had to admit he felt sorry for Scott, particularly the humiliation he'd gone through facing Adelaide Washington in the court room. It couldn't have been easy for him to lose all access to his son especially when up to now he had never made a wrong decision about anything important in his life.
He frowned, rose to his feet and activated the camera detector.
Irrespective, it still didn't give Scott the right to think he was the only one who had a personal life affected by International Rescue.
He had some very private issues of his own too and no-one was helping him deal with those.
XXXXXXXXXX
The sterile steel benches were a very welcome solace when a woman wasn't allowed to express herself, particularly living in a household completely dominated by men. When pressures were building and tensions were high it gave her satisfaction to bang and crash and slam things around to at least make herself feel better. It did nothing for the bench of course, she often worried if she'd dented a few bits of it here and there over the years, but at least it got the point across to the offender without the need to say as much as a word.
But today things were very different. She had a point to make all right and nothing would have pleased her more than to make it, but today even Josephine Tracy realised it was in the best interests of everyone to be silent.
Faced with having to deal with the fall-out from the scene she had witnessed earlier, she elected to sit alone at the bench, head down, arms folded, worried; saddened, and disturbed.
This whole thing with Scott was such a mess.
He wouldn't talk to his Father about how he felt anymore.
She sighed.
He wouldn't even talk to her.
He'd closed up like a book and had nothing to say to anyone.
His reaction was only natural, she told herself, looking apprehensively out towards the ocean. He'd never been much of a talker since the day his Mother died. He'd always preferred to articulate himself to others by his actions of love, caring and concern.
That had always been a sore point with her.
Despite her encouragement, he rarely allowed his own feelings to show and he spoke about them even less.
"Hiding how you feel behind some sort of mask of self discipline and cast iron self control isn't natural I swear." she thought to herself. "None of it."
She sighed again.
Whilst those attributes might have served him well in the Air Force, they certainly weren't doing much to help him cope with the sad reality of what was happening to him now.
She hated to admit it; not only because she thought the world of him but also because out of all Jeff's sons, he was the one least likely to crack; but Scott was teetering far too close to the edge at the moment for her liking.
She had tried to get him to confide in her by making him see she understood.
These things weren't things a Grandmother particularly approved of, she'd said, but they were things she knew most likely happened. Tracy Island was a lonely place for a handsome young bachelor and the need for female "companionship" when he went to the mainland for his Father wasn't anything for him to be ashamed of.
"Sweetheart it's natural thing for a man to want to be with a woman." she'd said to him with a touch of a reassuring hand.
She pursed her lips with disapproval.
She just wished he hadn't picked that one.
Her frown deepened.
Even so, he couldn't continue punishing himself for what had happened between them in Manhattan any more than he could keep punishing himself for the fact that one afternoon of panic and indiscretion had robbed him of all opportunity to ever be a Father to his son.
She twisted her fingers together unhappily. She didn't understand the law but she certainly understood the importance of family. A Tracy son, no matter how he'd made his way into the world, had a right to grow up surrounded by the basic values of truth and decency. A Tracy son also deserved to be nurtured in the special love only a Daddy like Scott could give him.
The frowned deepened further.
And if Scott was Daniel's Daddy, Daniel's place was here with him. Not … she silently festered within herself …somewhere in Manhattan with that … that Washington woman.
Her process of thought changed. The court decision troubled her but there had been a lot more go on in this household lately that troubled her even more.
"I swear he grows more and more like that Father of his with every single waking moment." she suddenly observed out loud.
She startled when Kyrano seemed to appear from nowhere and began to walk towards the bench. In his hands he held two cups of freshly brewed green tea.
"Yes, Mr. Tracy and Scott have always shared a very definite likeness." the elderly retainer acknowledged, placing the cups on the table and giving her a faint hint of a smile. "Of that there is no doubt."
Josephine Tracy gave him an anaemic smile of her own and courteously motioned him to sit down. She always welcomed a pleasant conversation with Mr. Kyrano no matter how unhappy she was feeling about things. Over the years he had proven himself to not only be a good sounding board whenever she was worried or upset, but a close and trusted friend as well.
She accepted the tea gratefully and lifted the elegant china cup to her lips.
"Kyrano I'm not talking about Scott." she said trying her best to not to be too blunt. "Although you're not far off the mark if you want my opinion on the way things are around here at the moment."
Kyrano looked confused.
"Mrs Tracy?" he queried politely. "I'm afraid I do not understand your meaning."
She shrugged her shoulders with a kind of saddened resolution.
"No I know you probably don't understand Mr Kyrano." she said, appreciating his honesty. "That's because I'm talking about my own son at the moment and not my Grandson. For the life of me I can't believe Jeff lost his temper and blew up like Mount Vesuvius this morning. It's not like him to lose control of himself with his sons and neither is taking out everything and everybody in his path in the process."
Her hands clenched around her cup.
"But that's exactly what his Father used to do when he got frustrated with situations he couldn't control." she added firmly. "Bottled it all up inside until the fire had nowhere else to go and then let fly at some poor innocent bystander who happened to be around him at the time."
She fixed her determined, dark blue eyes on his face.
"Believe me when I say I know all about that Mr Kyrano," she finished, "because when my Grant was alive and breathing on this earth, nine times out of ten the innocent bystander was me."
She folded her arms and looked down at the bench, trying to sort things through.
"He'll regret it too once he simmers down and realises what he's said to his son in the heat of the moment. Grant always regretted things when he finally calmed himself down. Ended up spending more time making up for what he said to me than the time it actually took for him to say it."
Her head slowly shook back and forth.
"I know Jeff's only worried that Scott isn't coping with the hand life's dealing out to him at the moment, but irrespective Mr Kyrano, I don't think what he said in there this morning was any way to deal with it. Not a Father who idolises his eldest son like my Jeff does."
Kyrano nodded his head gravely.
"As always you speak words of great wisdom Mrs Tracy." he agreed. "All of us are worried about Scott at the moment and it goes without saying that as a Father, Mr Tracy is the most worried of us all."
Josephine Tracy arched her eyebrows and gave him a wry look. He was so predictable; this quiet, dignified friend of her only son.
"And as usual Mr Kyrano I notice you have conveniently refrained from commenting on the rest of it." she observed.
Kyrano reddened. Josephine Tracy was elderly but he had long since given up the notion she could ever be fooled by anyone.
"As you know Mrs Tracy it is not my place to interfere or offer opinions." he responded politely. "My position here is merely to ensure the smooth running of the household and attend to Mr Tracy's private and professional needs."
"Of course it is Mr. Kyrano. I didn't expect you assumed anything else. "she replied.
Both of them fell silent and continued to sip their tea. This time it was Kyrano who had his head down, deep in thought. He had been privy to much more in this situation with Scott than Josephine Tracy would ever know or would ever be allowed to know. Even though she involved herself in everything to do with her son and grandsons, she had not seen the side of Jefferson Grant Tracy he had seen over the past few months.
She assumed the hours her son spent alone in his Office were spent making money or addressing urgent Tracy Enterprises business. "A workaholic even in a crisis," she had chided him. "Jeff can't you see making money does nothing whatsoever to support your son?"
As Kyrano well knew, nothing could have been further from the truth.
Josephine Tracy had no idea his Office was the only place he could go to safely hide the tears of a Father in turmoil, a man torn between risking the business he had hidden his grief behind for over twenty years and meant everything to him ... and the Grandson he might never know.
The pain of his decision was killing him.
"Am I wrong in denying my son access to his own flesh and blood old friend?" he had asked him on more than one occasion, "Or am I guilty of just seeing the legalities Scott's inflicted on himself for what they really are?"
Kyrano grimaced noticeably remembering how deeply he had been affected by those words. In all the years he had known Jefferson Tracy, a lack of confidence in his parental decisions was something Jefferson Tracy didn't have.
He looked over at her and resignedly lifted his cup.
Josephine Tracy only knew the half of it even though she meant well.
"The trouble with Jefferson..." she continued as much to herself as to him, "…is he's too darned direct for his own good and he's worse again when he ties himself up in knots and gets worried. I told him that myself when he blew up about what happened between Scott and that Adelaide woman in the first place and time and knowledge of the situation hasn't made him any better. "
Only then did she pause and look to him for affirmation.
"You see Mr. Kyrano, my Jeff thinks the world of his boys and I'm not telling you anything when I say he takes it rather personally if any of them fail."
When the affirmation didn't come she folded her arms once more and looked back out at the tranquil tropical day.
There had to be way to sort out this mess.
There had to be a way to access Daniel.
Her eyes narrowed.
And she wouldn't rest in bed at night until she found herself an answer.
XXXXXXX
There were times when Virgil Tracy wished the reputation of International Rescue didn't sit solely and squarely on his shoulders. The enormous green craft could only go so fast and it wasn't easy to arrive at a danger zone to be informed, yet again, that the success of the mission completely depended on his ability to drop, launch and man the rescue equipment all in under record time.
Flying in over this particular scene was bad enough.
Gordon's reaction had said it all.
"Whoaaaaa..." was the only word that left the lips of the International Rescue Aquanaut.
In the meantime he was being subjected to John's five minutes of terse, intensive instructions.
"Hi Virgil it sure is good to see you again." he flung back good-naturedly in response. "By the way big brother I hope you enjoyed your flight."
John Tracy failed to see the humour. His chest heaved with stress as he stood alone on the mountainside diligently manning the mobile control.
"Yeah yeah OK. I'm sorry Virg." he said distractedly. "I didn't mean to bark at you like that. I guess I'm a little tense."
Two chestnut eyebrows arched as the long artistic hands remained steady on the controls. A little? John was so wound up at the moment he sounded like he'd been asked to stand solo right in front of the firing squad.
"Take it easy Johnny." he said calmly glancing over at Gordon who still sat open mouthed surveying the scene. "We'll be with you in a few minutes."
"FAB Virgil but do you think you could kind of hurry? From what I can figure any survivors still alive down here are fast running out of time."
"FAB John. I'm commencing my descent now."
"I'll take charge of clearing the road Virg." Gordon offered, carefully scanning the terrain. "That way the emergency authorities will be able to assist us with the recovery."
"I guess so … but how long's all that gonna take?" Virgil replied dubiously
"Shouldn't take me more than an hour I figure."
"Gordo ..."
"What Johnny?"
"You got half an hour."
"Half an hour? No way. Have you seen what I'm going to have to do?"
"Yeah I have Gordon. Like I said; half an hour."
"Yeah and you're kidding me too right?"
"Squirt I'm fast finding out no-one kids around when they're given this job."
There was a momentary silence from both Thunderbird Two and Mobile Control.
"OK John." finally crackled across the frequency. "Half an hour it is then."
"Thanks. Mobile Control to Thunderbird Five."
Alan's voice sounded loud and clear across all frequencies.
"Thunderbird Five. Go ahead John."
"Alan … if that data changes and we need to get the hell out of here fast... you make sure you yell…"
"FAB. Standing by."
"Alan …"
"What?"
"Yell LOUD."
"That's a promise Mobile Control"
"Mobile Control to Thunderbird Two."
"Thunderbird Two."
"Virgil ..."
The voice of command faltered.
"Johnny?"
"Virgil …"
"You OK Johnny?"
"Virgil...I'm not Scott."
The voice of reassurance sounded supportively across the frequency.
"Yeah I know you're not. But this is International Rescue little brother and there's no room in this outfit for doubt."
XXXXXXX
He knew she didn't have very long and he realised she had other things to think about with the demands being placed upon her with the rescue; but he'd been waiting for the chance to confide in her ever since they'd left the courtroom and he wasn't going to get a better opportunity.
Almost feeling a sense of relief, he padded to the end the hallway and knocked on the door of the suite she shared with his youngest brother Alan.
He had to talk about how he felt to someone and Tin-Tin was the only one who understood how precious his relationship was with the beautiful Bombardier pilot Miss Margo Marin.
He hesitated outside for a few moments feeling stupidly like a child. She was nearly eight years younger than he was. Even so, it never felt that way when he confided in Tin-Tin about Margo. Sophisticated and worldly, intelligent and astute she complimented his personality perfectly.
Slowly he lifted his hand. It was hard not to squirm and look about uncomfortably at the thought of what he was about to say. Confiding in Tin-Tin meant stripping away his façade and he never felt relaxed about letting his guard down when it came to divulging how he felt.
He continued to remind himself this was in his best interests. He needed to have this conversation with Tin-Tin whether he was going to like what she had to say to him or not. Whatever she said would be true.
She always listened and she was always honest.
... and ... he acknowledged, finally mustering the courage to tap on the door ... she knew Margo Marin almost as intimately as he did.
Tin-Tin responded to the curt, sharp knock almost immediately.
"Come in." she called.
He faltered before opening the door.
"Do this damn you." the voice inside of him said. "You trust her. You know you do"
She obviously wasn't expecting him but she disguised her reaction well with a tired but welcoming smile.
He smiled tiredly too.
He supposed he could understand why she appeared to be surprised. He'd been avoiding her like the plague for the past two days, particularly when he saw she held baby AJ in her arms. Every time he saw Alan and Tin-Tin's robust baby boy, the pain of his situation with Daniel cut deeper and he had to excuse himself or turn away.
It didn't help that she cradled baby AJ now.
"Hi honey." he said tentatively, his hand still grasping the edge of the door. "You got time to talk at the moment?"
She indicated the feeding baby and the little chestnut haired toddler sitting close beside her on the bed.
"Of course I do Scott. Please come in and sit down."
She motioned him to sit on the end of the king sized bed and went on to ask him if he was feeling any better. After a few hours sleep, courtesy of some strange herbal remedy of his Grandmother's, he had to admit to her that he was.
"I'm glad." she said genuinely. "I've been very worried about you these past few days Scott."
She hesitated, not wanting to upset him, but then decided to continue.
"And so has Mr. Tracy."
He averted his eyes immediately. He didn't want to talk about the earlier altercation with his Father. They'd both said things they'd regretted in the heat of the moment and for that he was sincerely sorry, but when it came to standing him down as Field Commander of International Rescue his Father had made it very clear to him that if he wasn't fit for command, he had no regrets about standing him down at all.
"Mr. Tracy did what he had to do Scott. He cares about you very much." she offered carefully.
His eyes returned to hers. Despite how he unhappy he was about the stand-down he knew deep in his heart she was right.
"What a pity I don't care too much for myself then isn't it Tin-Tin?"
With that the forum for his self-assassination opened… how he felt about everything that had happened in his life recently;
...the guilt of involving himself with a married woman.
...the disgust he felt for demanding a legal agreement when he should have found another way to face up to his responsibilities.
...the way he conducted himself in the court.
...how he had acted that morning in the lounge.
From there he moved on to his relationship with Margo;
... how he could possibly think he deserved a woman like her.
... how afraid he was that she would end things if he told her anything about Daniel.
"It's bad enough I'm lying to her about International Rescue Tin-Tin." he confessed. "How do you think I feel knowing there's all this crap festering in the back of my closet too?"
She listened to him attentively but without any comment.
Scott had confided in her from the beginning that he wanted to be honest about his life in International Rescue. They'd had many a private discussion in the past as to the reasons he couldn't. Security ... danger … the risk to the Organisation if things didn't work out between them...
And now, just when it looked like things might be working out, he had to grapple with the additional agony of whether to hide the truth about his past from Margo too.
"A past which includes signing away my son because I made a stupid mistake which one day might cost the Company money." he swallowed looking at his image in the mirrors with loathing. "Hardly makes for good husband material in Margo's eyes does it Tin-Tin?"
In the silence that followed she bowed her head and watched the rhythmic movements of the baby at her breast and then at the little girl whose life had so very nearly ended on a cold sterile bench in San Diego.
Husband material.
Alan hadn't been the best husband material in the beginning either and she was the very first person to admit it. She would never forget how frightened she had been the day he took her to that awful place and how difficult it had been for her to forgive him when his conscience forced him to realise aborting their baby would be wrong.
"We all make mistakes Scott..." she finally observed," ... and we both know Margo expects you to be honest in all matters to do with yourself and with her."
Her face reflected her complete honesty.
"There's the problem." he replied with more than a sense of hopelessness. "How she's going to react to that honesty eighteen months after the fact?"
Tin-Tin had to admit she understood. She didn't know how Margo was going to react either. Her initial reaction to Scott had not been very complementary. To Margo he had been nothing but a playboy and she had been adamant if he wanted any kind of relationship with her there was no room in his life for other women.
"Scott as I said to you before, we are all guilty of making mistakes."
Her brown eyes remained steady.
"Even you..." she stressed gently.
She allowed him a few minutes to digest her words. He always showed so much compassion for others but never showed the same compassion for himself. She sometimes thought that as the eldest, he didn't actually believe he was entitled to any.
"Scott." she continued. "What you must decide in your heart is whether you believe what happened months before the two of you met would affect the deep and real love I know she feels for you now."
To his own mind came the love he had developed for Margo Marin over the past eighteen months. It was a love he had never felt for Adelaide Washington. It was a love he wanted in his life forever and the love he remembered witnessing so freely as a child. He wanted Margo Marin to welcome him home when he came back tired and dirty from a rescue. He wanted her to put her arms around him and tell him sometimes it was all right for a man to feel afraid. He wanted the same married love that Alan had and God willing bring some children of their own into the world.
Children ...
Therein lay the other complication.
Margo had always been up front and honest about the possibility she may not be able to give him children. What is meant to be is meant to be he reassured her. If push came to shove they could always adopt. How would she cope knowing another woman could so easily nurture his seed?
He wearily rubbed his forehead.
Dear God.
No wonder he couldn't sleep.
Margo wouldn't cope at all and he knew it.
The dreaded scene began unfolding in his head like a deck of cards and it was every bit as horrific as the night he faced Adelaide Reynolds on the sidewalk in Las Vegas.
He began to sweat.
Not again. He couldn't face something like that again.
"Tin-Tin..." he suddenly blurted.
"What Scott?"
"Do you mind if ask you something?"
"You know you've always been able to ask me anything Scott."
"It's personal."
"Oh ... " she faltered. "Ummm … all right."
"And I need you to be completely honest with this one honey."
Honesty in all her words and actions.
She had been raised that way from a child.
Her eyes expectantly lifted to his waiting for the question.
"Of course." she agreed.
"Tin-Tin I'll understand if you don't want to answer this but ... honey ... well ... if Alan walked through that door right now and told you he thought he'd Fathered a son with another woman ... how would it make you feel?"
Tin-Tin became thoughtful and once again focussed her attention on the baby she held in her arms. Her first reaction was that it wouldn't really surprise her. Alan had never made a secret of his trysts with women before the two of them had become lovers. Even now he sometimes forgot himself when he was joking around with Gordon about the things they used to do in the past.
Her second reaction was her first reaction was stupid. She was the only one in his life now.
"I think initially I would be very hurt." she admitted after a long deliberation. "... and I also think I would find the news of a child by another woman most difficult for me to accept."
Scott's eyes widened with dismay.
"You see Tin-Tin? That's exactly my point and that's exactly why I know what's going to happen to us if I tell her."
She shook her head and urged him to calm down.
"No Scott please listen. At no time did I say I wouldn't still love Alan if something like that happened."
Scott was far too distressed to believe her.
"Forgive my directness here Tin-Tin but wouldn't the thought of him being with another woman change the way you feel about him even just a little?"
Her face contorted sadly.
"I live with that thought each and every time he is within me..." she confided quietly, "... but despite his earlier indiscretions I still love him very deeply. You too must remember that Margo has those same deep feelings for you Scott and she has already told you she knows of your reputation in the past."
Tin-Tin paused a moment and then looked thoughtfully at Scott. "The other thing that makes it easier for me to handle is the fact I am the one who Alan married, I am the one he chose, and that makes everything else regarding his past trysts unimportant."
The pretty young Malaysian girl gave him an encouraging smile and carefully removed the sleeping baby boy from her breast.
"I think you should go to New York and tell Margo about Daniel Scott." she said with gentle conviction.
"You will not be able to let this go until you do."
XXXXXX
Despite the sophistication of the equipment, the excavation couldn't have gone any slower. The mountainside had long since grown dark and they had been forced to stop the rescue effort and erect all the helium lights they carried. The darkness was bathed in the eerie artificial light as John and Virgil grimly resumed their efforts to cut through and lift the masses of tangled concrete that once represented a residential village. There were no cries for help under the rubble anymore. There was nothing but a deafening silence.
"Are you getting the feeling there's no point to all this kid?" Virgil sighed as yet another slab of concrete was removed to reveal another.
"Nope." John replied abruptly preparing to concentrate on the delicacy of the next lift. "There's always a point to everything in your life if you look hard enough to find it."
He flashed a half hearted smile. "For the record …Grandma's words not mine. "
"Oh? And would you care to elaborate further in this case Grandma?"
"OK sure. Maybe all this insanity might end up saving a life or two. Good reason for any son-of-a-bitch to bust a gut on a mountainside in the middle of the night wouldn't you agree?"
"You're no Scott when it comes to philosophy John."
"Don't ever recall professing to be …"
"Probably just as well."
"Mmmmm …now if a man can just take this baby back a little further…."
Virgil's eyes dilated as John rolled the machinery back to the point where it teetered dangerously close to the edge of the cliff-face.
"Jesus John!" he swore glancing at the deadly drop behind him. "Be careful with yourself why don't you?"
"Careful?" John snapped as the machinery lurched forward. "I'm working on a seventy degree slope with nothing but a harness and whatever's sticking to my underwear holding me in place Virgil. Pluck the careful crap out of your ass will you?"
"Now you're starting to sound like Scott."
"I'm flattered."
"Don't be. It's no compliment."
"I'd never have guessed."
Further down the mountainside, the sheer slope of the cliff-face and the unrelenting weather was starting to drive Gordon crazy. Normally calm and focussed under pressure, the cracks were beginning to appear in his demeanour at the lack of visible progress.
"This is nothing but a nightmare from hell." he spat through the communications. "We're getting nowhere with this. I've cut twelve; you've lifted twelve and all we seem to do find bodies and another God damn slab."
"You got any better ideas on how we work our way through this great big pile of rubble Einstein?" John growled.
"No I haven't John, but you've gotta start wondering if it's possible for anyone to still be alive under there."
"We're not giving this gig up just because the going's tough Gordo."
"The going's not tough Johnny. It's straight out depressing that's what it is."
"Gordo ..."
"Christ Virgil ...what?"
"Take it easy kid huh?"
"Virgil's right Gordo. If we find even one person alive under all this crap it'll be worth it."
"You know John that was my next line."
"I'll say the required lines around here if you don't mind. Goes with the job description I believe."
"Like I said. You're no Scott."
"And like I said… don't profess to be."
"You're a real ass you know that?"
"Yeah I do. Now keep your mind on the job."
"Boy give the guy a little power and it turns him into a ..."
Virgil stopped in mid sentence.
"Shhh …"
John frowned.
"What?"
"Shut the hell up Johnny ..."
Virgil held his finger in dire warning against his lips.
"I mean it man."
He dropped his head and listened carefully until he was absolutely sure he heard the sounds again.
"Oh my God Johnny ...I'm serious ... over there ..." he yelled, pointing in the direction of the rubble.
"I think there's someone under there alive."
Author's Note - Well even I though I acknowledge it's no "All I want for Christmas" and I know many of the good writers will call it "AU", I enjoyed writing this.
NEXT CHAPTER - "The Nightmare from Hell... Part 2 ... Reality answers"