A/N: Sorry this one took a while, but with school over we're forced to commiserate on the story via Instant Messaging and that's not so easy when you're all working different hours.

1652 ZULU

JAG HEADQUARTERS

FALLS CHURCH, VIRGINIA

The Admiral had been a little more cheerful since he'd gotten the word from the Deputy Director of Central Intelligence around 0900 this morning. This was in stark contrast to the rest of the week where he had been acting like a lion with a thorn in his paw. Now he had news, Harm and Mac were both alive and on their way home. The director had described their mission as an overwhelming success and had even joked about enlisting the help of Marines more often.

The Admiral had decided against telling Commander Turner or Lieutenant Sims-Roberts until just before lunch so that they would have time to digest the news. So, when the time came, the Admiral had told Tiner to have Sturgis and Harriet report to his office. He had news for them; he would have preferred to have made the second announcement when Harm and Mac had gotten back but Harm's doctors said that would be ten days at the inside.

So, instead of waiting, he figured it best to just inform Harriet, Sturgis and Tiner now, then wait until Harm and Mac came back since Bud would be returning from sea duty around the same time. Chances were, Bud would find out from Harriet long before then anyway. A few minutes before noon; Turner and Sims would be in his office any minute, followed of course by Tiner and if his timing was right, Bev would enter the office just as he prepared.

"Commander Turner and Lieutenant Sims reporting as ordered, sir." Sturgis piped up as they came to attention in front of the Admiral's desk.

"At ease." The Admiral addressed them. "Since you two expressed interest in knowing, I think it's time to tell you that I received news on Colonel MacKenzie and Captain Rabb from Langley this morning. They made it out of Indonesia alright and the Captain is currently being treated for wounds in a Manila Hospital. That's all you two are cleared to know. Due to the nature of the Captain's injuries, his arrival home will be delayed by a few days."

"Well sir, considering the possible outcomes, one can be thankful that things turned out as well as they. They could have been much worse." Sturgis answered. "Will there be anything else, sir?" It was at that moment that Beverly Ross walked in behind Sturgis and Harriet. She caught the Admiral's eye and he smiled.

"Commander, does your father do weddings?" The Admiral asked Sturgis went from looking relieved to looking puzzled.

"As I remember, yes, sir." Sturgis answered, looking from Harriet over to the Admiral. "May I ask why, sir?"

"Because we're getting married." Bev answered as she finally walked passed the two officers and over to AJ's desk.

"Congratulations, ma'am!" Harriet squealed as she immediately enveloped Beverly in a hug. "Oh, this is wonderful, ma'am!"

"Mazel tov, Admiral." Sturgis mused with a smile and he even gave the Admiral a congratulatory pat on the shoulder.

0103 LOCAL

HOSPITAL OF MANILA

MANILA, PHILIPPINES

"I don't know, I never would have thought you would keep a relationship secret from me." Peach remarked as she walked out of Harm's hospital room.

"I kept it secret from the world, it's tough when your personal life can be turned into tabloid fodder. You want to know why I didn't say anything?" Nate looked from Peach to Mac and then back at Peach. "Two intelligent women and neither of you has a guess?" Nate started walking toward Mac. "You went to Duke Law, you ask questions for a living, your job is to have the answers, but you got nothing." Then he turned in his tirade toward Peach. "And I can't get snotty with you because I'm within millimetres of hurting you, if I haven't already, so I'm not going to risk hurting you any more then I possibly already have." Nate paused for a few seconds. "So since neither of you has any idea why I didn't say anything, why don't I tell you. It didn't matter, it still doesn't. It has been a very long day, I have killed thirteen people and if I don't get some sleep soon that number is going to skyrocket." He took a deep breath. "Mac, give Harm my regards. You," Nate turned back toward Peach, "were you looking forward to sharing a bed tonight or do I have to go back to the hotel alone?"

"Just answer one question." Peach stated reluctantly.

"Yes." Nate answered firmly.

"I didn't ask the question." Peach looked confused.

"I'm tired therefore I'm telepathic, the answer to your question is yes, right now I am currently single and I have been for a few hours thanks to the wonders of wireless technology. So, are we sharing a bed tonight so that we can both wake up tomorrow morning looking into each other's eyes like lovesick puppies or what?" Nate yawned openly. By this time, Mac had gone back into Harm's hospital room.

"You know, you get really sarcastic when you're tired." Peach slowly walked over and took his hand.

"You know, you're incredibly hot when I'm wide awake but when I'm tired and you're a little pissed off, you're sexy enough to make my blood boil. Now, either you and I head back to the hotel via the shoe leather express or I throw you over my shoulder and carry you, what's it gonna be?" Nate's patience was obviously wearing thin.

"Nate, I want to ask you a question." Peach stood firm.

"Can it be asked in the hotel room?" Nate retorted. Peach simply rolled her eyes and pressed on.

"Why?" She asked quietly.

"I thought we covered this already." Nate sighed.

"No, cut the fucking bullshit, Nathan and be honest with me because this whole week has just been one massive idiocy which seems to refuse to end and all I want from you amidst all of it is a little honesty. Why did you do all this? Why did you break up with your girlfriend? Why did you give up your dream job? Why were you willing to put a political bullet through your chance of ever being President? And finally, why did you fly 6000 miles and almost get yourself killed?" She was somewhere between shouting and crying.

"I would have thought the answer to every one of those questions was incredibly obvious." Nate answered with his typical juvenile sense of timing and wit. "I'm in love with you."

"Yeah, this week. I'm sure that Stacy heard the same thing last week and Rose heard it for the two years that you were married and God knows how many times during the years you were engaged. What I want to know is for how long? How long before I start to realize you're spending more and more time at the office? How long before I realize that the last time I heard I love you needs to be determined in figures of weeks and months?" Now she was crying.

"What do you want from me? You want me to be Prince Charming? I think I did a pretty fair imitation in the jungle this morning. The Ghillie suit may be no suit of armour but I went with what was available. You want me to give you guarantees? I can't, because there's nothing about the outside world that I can guarantee for you. I can however promise you that as long as there is breath in my body and blood in my veins, I will protect you from all that is evil of this world. I can promise that even if I can't always find time to say it, I will never stop loving you. I can promise to give of myself to you until I can't physically do so any more.

Stacy never heard me tell her I loved her and Rose stopped hearing it. It makes me a bad person to admit that I never really loved either of them but I didn't. I do love you." Nate reached out to hug her. Peach paused for a second and looked at him. He made quite a sight, a man with all the dignity and magnetism that his ears as a diplomat could grant him had run with ragged edges of sleep depravation and exhaustion.

"Nathan, we've had nine years, why now?" Peach asked, composing herself enough to look at him with tear glossed eyes.

"Because before, I thought I needed to protect you from me and I thought that the only way to do that was to distance you from me. I never realized that if you and I actually decided to face something head on, we both had the best chance of getting through it." Nate answered.

"But nine years, don't you think if it was meant to happen, it would have happened by now? It shouldn't have taken my facing death to bring these feelings out. What happened between us earlier in the hotel, that was nine years of pent up sexual tension that came with trying to affirm our own existence. I can't be someone you turned to because you were afraid I was going to die, a relationship like that would only do more damage to whatever this thing is between us." Peach watched as Nate's posture and expression fell through the floor. "It's better that we just take this as it is." She softly put a hand on his shoulder and walked passed him toward the door to the hospital. Nate stood there dumbfounded for a second and then sank to the chair in the hallway.

In the lonesome, dark hallway of the Hospital of Manila, a few notes of an old harmony could be heard, the words carrying their own meaning for one lost man as the local radio station broadcast a now poignant philosophical question: What Becomes of the Broken-hearted?

In the hospital room, Mac was still sitting by Harm's bedside as Gunny and Mike finished up talking to him and joking about the shape that their friend was in. Mac was always so aware of Harm's mortality, his fragility when he was laid up in a hospital bed from the first time when he had gotten hit by that car when they were running to after his swim in the Atlantic right before her almost catastrophe/mockery of a wedding with Brumby. He watched as Harm laughed along with Mike's jokes and took Gunny's respectful sarcasm with all the grace and attitude that he always had. After a few more minutes, they left the room.

"Hey there, sailor, looks like I've finally got you alone." Mac smiled sheepishly as she lightly brushed his brow.

"I suppose that means you're going to go all Mac the Marine nurse on me in order to make me get better." Harm laboured a blink.

"I'm just happy that you're getting better. What's the last thing you remember? The doctor said that you might incur some short term memory loss starting with the time when the initial trauma was incurred. What's the last thing you remember?" Mac edged her chair ever closer to the side of the bed and reached for his hand.

"I remember, the two guards that normally barged into the hut, they came in and pulled me up from the floor and dragged me across the compound to their quarters where they normally brutalized me. They took out the bamboo canes and just pounded the hell out of me, I remember them using razor blades. This time the one of them, I think his name might have been Aziz, he took one of the canes and cracked me over the side of the head. I really don't remember anything after that." Harm lightly shook his head from side to side.

"The doctor said that you're not supposed to do that." Mac smiled as she stroked his knuckles with a feather touch.

"Nurse MacKenzie already? Does it come with the cute little white outfit?" Harm had a brightness in his eyes as he spoke.

"As wounded as you are and you can still fire up that flyboy playbook. Well, I might rent the costume but only if you're good." Mac teased with a light fire in her eyes.

"I was scared, Mac. I've been scared before in my life but never like I was in that hut. I mean, my ramp strike, the accident in the Atlantic, they were all terrifying but none as terrifying as being in that jungle. The reason that it was so bad in that hut was that there was no conceivable end, no escape, no other options. I couldn't let anyone, especially not her go through what I was going through, not because I'm a man and I'm stronger but because if it had been you and Nate in that hut, he would have done anything to prevent it from being you that they bludgeoned, you that they sliced so cruelly, I did it for her, because he would have done it for you……because I wouldn't think twice about making the sacrifice for you." Harm bowed his head for a second. "It's a rare thing, you know, to find someone that you're willing to go that far for." Harm yawned and raised a hand over the bandages on his scalp.

"Go to sleep, Harm. We'll talk more in the morning, the doctor says you need some sleep." Mac coached as Harm leaned back on the pillows. Mac tightly took his hands between hers.

"Mac, I know this is going to sound really weird coming from me but, could you perhaps, curl up on the bed with me? I hate to presume on our friendship but I really can't feel alone tonight." Harm gave her his best puppy dog look. Rather then answer with words, Mac simply got up out of her chair and crawled up into the hospital bed with Harm. She lay on her side with her hand on his chest looking up at him.

"Like this?" She asked just above a whisper.

"Just like that." Harm gently ran a hand through her hair. After a few seconds, the two of them had fallen asleep on the bed in a position that any human being in their right mind would think to be a position of intimacy when in reality it was yet another loop in what had become a rollercoaster relationship.

The wee hours of the morning crept on and the two of them slept peacefully together amidst the beeping of the monitors and computers that told the physiological story of one life that now found another permanently attached to it. Harm's chest rose and fell through the night and one could see Mac rise and fall from her sleeping position on her chest. Harm began to toss and turn violently, Mac rising out of her slumber as he convulsed more violently.

A few more seconds passed and what had started out as mere violent convulsions had grown beyond that into growing murmurs of discontent and then words began to form out of the murmurs. Mac could only decipher rampant repetitions of the word 'no' over and over as she waited for Harm to wake up. She slowly began to here Harm shout in his sleep as his movements became more violent still. Finally, his eyes flew open and Harm found himself hyperventilating and drenched in sweat.

"Harm, what's wrong?" Mac asked as she sat up next to him and ran one hand down his forearm.

"It all……it all seemed so real. I don't remember it, but it all seemed to real. The heat, the stinging of the bamboo canes, the rusting scratch of the blades as they tore into my skin; the screams of pain, it all seemed too real and so horrifying." Harm breathed heavily as Mac tried her best to be supportive and calm him down.

"I'm here, just remember that. Whatever you need, I'm here for you." She held his head to her chest in order to soothe him.

"You're so good to me. Why?" Harm asked lightly as moonlight through the window began to blanket them. Mac was momentarily reminded of a similar night in Harm's apartment where her sleep troubles had led him to comfort her and landed her with a few moments of tenderness and the new nom de guerre of "ninja-girl".

"I remember this old song, it goes: 'close your eyes, I'm right beside you. Run for miles, you know I'll find you. If you need a friend, close your eyes, I'm back again'. I always knew one day that I would be that close to someone. Part of my sanity is you Harmon Rabb, and I need to keep you around to stay sane." Mac smiled as they lay back down on the pillow.

"Trust me, Sarah; it's mutual." Harm said as he wrapped his arms around her and the two of them fell back into sleep.

0837 LOCAL

HOSPITAL OF MANILA

MANILA, PHILIPPINES

"They expect you to run the country, but you spend the night in a hospital chair in your clothes? Nathan, you disappoint me." Moshe kicked Nate's boots with his own to wake up his godson.

"I had a long night." Nate was groggy.

"I gathered as much. Your face reads of regret, like you would drown yourself in a bottle if presented with the option. Tell me why this is my godson." Moshe sat next to Nate and put his hand on the younger man's back.

"My reason for coming here went up in flames last night; like a cherry bomb on the fourth of July." Nate leaned forward, elbows digging into his knees.

"It is oft said of the Jews that when logic fails for our rationale, we turn our eyes to God. Even if your initial reason for coming here went bust, you still can take great pride in the fact that you brought a major international terrorist to justice and you saved the lives of many innocent people while taking the lives of many dangerous ones. You had a reason for coming to Indonesia, Nathan. You just have to stop looking at God and start looking at yourself in order to see it." Moshe stated with a typical Jewish wisdom and mysticism.

"No wonder my dad keeps a list of occasions on which he's wanted to wipe that smug Yekke smile off your face." Nate cracked a crooked smile. "Nothing can make up for what I lost last night. For once I stopped thinking about myself and my career and all that noise and I stopped wanting to take on the world alone. I admitted to myself that I actually needed someone else."

"Not an easy thing for a stubborn Scotsman to do." Moshe joked with a characteristic Jewish sarcasm.

"No, it isn't. The thing is, that she doesn't need me." Nate dropped his head into his hands. When he lifted them again, his eyes had glossed over with unshed tears. "Why did you come here?"

"I felt the need to tell you that, while we were incredibly brutal with our methods, Bashram eventually talked. He gave us eighteen names and key intelligence on Hashawiri and Bin Laden. Among the names were Abu Ziyda, Hassan Mourari and Sadiq Fahd. We handed him over to the CIA early this morning, he's going to Guantanamo for detention." Moshe answered with a heavy exhale. "The President has been informed. I've been told that after you get back to Washington and after your pending confirmation hearings, you'll host a top level meeting of Foreign Ministers from Britain, Canada, Israel, Germany and France, the topics will be what to do with these eighteen names. I also came because I wished to see you off since you will be leaving soon. I do get to spend such little time with you."

"I think I need work again, I need something to get my mind off of everything." Nate answered as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Do not remove your mind from this matter but consider it more thoroughly. Find a place to focus your thoughts. Volunteer with your sister's parish." Moshe coached as the two of them got up out of the chairs.

"I don't know, Moshe. So much of my life seems so pointless now." Nate answered as they turned toward Harm's hospital room door. Moshe lightly pushed the door open to reveal Harm and Mac cuddled together on the hospital bed.

"I'm sure there is a time at which so much of their lives seemed pointless. Eventually, Nathan, your time will come. The puzzle will fall into place. You're like Moses, doomed to wander the desert for years before you find what you are looking for." Moshe mused.

"Moses had the option of stopping at an Exxon station, he was in the Middle East after all." Nate joked with a weak smile.

"It will all work again, Nathan. It's just broken right now." With that, Moshe turned and walked back out of the hospital, leaving Nate to stand in the middle of the hallway, once again all alone. After a few minutes of just pondering Karma and the nature of the universe, a man wearing an American Navy Commander's uniform approached him cautiously.

"Secretary Ross, sir?" The man hazarded a guess.

"Yes, Commander." Nate answered weakly.

"I'm Commander Chase, sir, the chief neurosurgeon at Bethesda, I was wondering if you could guide me to Captain Rabb's room. I've been ordered by CINCOMPAC to evaluate the Captain's condition and if possible take him into medical possession on board the John Kennedy." The fresh-faced Commander grinned at the cabinet member whom he held in awe.

"Of course, Commander, it's right through that door." Nate guided the young man to the door and pushed it wide open, to find Harm and Mac awake this time. "Guys, I just stopped by to say bye for now, I'm headed back to Washington. See you stateside?"

"You're on." Harm challenged, pointing his index finger at Nate.

"Alright, Captain Rabb, I'm Commander Chase the chief of neurosurgery at Bethesda, you'll have to excuse if I'm a little short with you since I've been on a Helo for the better part of the last sixteen hours in order to get here." The Commander began to examine Harm's bandages. "From what I was told by the attending, the Captain's surgery went pretty much as expected. He's a very lucky man, if his injury had been any more severe then it was or if any more time had elapsed before treatment, he would be one very dead squid."

"How is he now, Commander?" Mac jumped right in.

"He's in good shape all things considered. He's well enough for me to recommend that he be moved over to the medical centre on the Kennedy once he's up and mobile, which judging by his chart, should be tomorrow." Commander Chase made a few unintelligible marks on Harm's chart. "Orders from CINCOMPAC and the Chief of Naval Operation's offices are for you to remain aboard the USS Kennedy until such a time as I can be sure that the Captain can fly safely back home. When he arrives back in DC, I'm only releasing him from Naval Medical custody provided that he can be released into the custody of someone else for a period of time no shorter then two weeks."

"He can be released into my custody." Mac interjected.

"Mac……I wouldn't want to impose…" Harm tried to speak but Mac cut him off.

"You almost died, I'm fully able and willing to take care of you, end of discussion." Mac put a hand over Harm's mouth both to hush him and to illustrate her point. "Also doctor, Harm had a night terror last night. He woke up hyperventilating and screaming, is this normal with patients after this kind of surgery?"

"Not unheard of. Captain, can you tell me what the terror was about?" Commander Chase removed Mac's hand from Harm's mouth.

"It seemed like it was something from my time in detainment. I don't remember it but it fit in…you know…like a piece of the puzzle." Harm explained weakly.

"Could be the recovery of actual memory spaces. Like unlocking parts of your subconscious, since amnesia is a fairly common side effect with this kind of trauma and operation, it's entirely possible that you're just working through an amnesia induced fog space in your memory." Commander Chase re-hung the chart off the end of the bed. "It's possible and likely that your memory will slowly come back."

"So, it won't have a negative effect on his recovery?" Mac asked looking for confirmation.

"Quite the opposite, likely. The Captain will be transferred to the medical centre on board the Kennedy tomorrow, at which point I'll be on board for a week to monitor his condition. When I believe that he has sufficiently recovered, I'll head back stateside with him. Then he should be on the fast track to recovery. I'll see you two tomorrow, Captain, Colonel." With that, Commander Chase took his leave of his two senior officers.

(Cue "Take it Outside" by Barenaked Ladies)

"Harm, I have no problem taking care of you." Mac took his hand and lightly stroked it.

"I know, I just feel like hell, Mac and I don't want to be a burden on you." Harm offered a weak smile.

"Harmon Rabb, like it or not, after all these years, you're a part of my sanity and I'll loose that sanity if there's a chance that you can pass out and make me develop even better bedside manner then I already have had to develop in the years I've been your friend. Now get some rest, you need more then you're willing to admit."

1246 LOCAL

MANILA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

MANILA, PHILIPPINES

Nate had his bags slung over his shoulder and a ten year-old suit on his back. His hair was still mussed and the hair on his face was days passed a shave. He had what smelled like an ounce of cologne on his neck and a tired look on his face that would make him a nightmare for any manic-depressive. "Flight 68, flying Manila to Washington with a stopover in San Francisco is now boarding." Nate held out his boarding pass and ticket then walked through the gate to a nice cozy first class seat.

"Hey, you're headed home too?" Mike Bradley walked over and gave Nate a pat on the back. "Another mission well done, huh Marine?"

"Feels that way, Mikey. Feels that way." Nate chuckled as they walked through the gate toward the plane. Nate and Mike walked into the plane and into the first class section. Nate was about to put his bag in the overhead storage compartment when he saw Peach further down the aisle, he stopped for a second when their eyes met then angrily pushed the rest of his baggage into the compartment before taking his seat.

"So, have you talked to the President since you decided to run off to Indonesia?" Mike asked as he rolled his neck on the headrest of his seat.

"No, have you talked to the Director?" Nate answered quickly.

"Yeah, you're not his favourite person right now. Ever since you decided to run off on an unofficial, unsanctioned Company expensed vacation to the lovely South Pacific, everyone else in the USNSC has been turned into a veritable punching. Since it was discovered that you were the one who negotiated the terms by which the Israelis were able to torture the information out of Bashram and we still ended up with custody of him. You upgraded your status from prodigal son to daddy's favourite very rapidly." Mike mused.

"It's good to be well-liked." Nate joked as he put on a set of earphones and plugged into the movie.