Chapter Two- How I learnt to play Choochoo

I've been called a lot of things in my life. Stupid, comes to mind a lot. Insane in more recent years. Slut, bitch, whore, freak. A credit risk. An accident waiting to happen. Gorgeous, plane, and downright frightening. A danger to myself and others. Cookie. Cupcake. Sweetie. Babe. Immature. Not marriage material. The unstable daughter. An underachiever. Impulsive. Naive. Gullible.

But the best description by far was from my kindergarten teacher on my first school report. "Stephanie is enthusiastic but foolhardy. She is easily coerced by her peers and often led into trouble." Mrs Delaney's comments couldn't have been more apt. And not just in kindergarten, but for the rest of my life. I have always had a problem with falling for bad ideas. It really only takes a few persuasive words and a charismatic smile, and I'll follow almost anyone. Which is why I've fallen victim to Joseph Morelli my entire life.

Morelli is annoyingly good at being persuasive. Even as a little kid he had a smile that could convince me to do anything. As long as I've been easily coerced, Morelli has been there to coerce me. He comes from very charismatic stock. Persuasiveness is in the genes. That's how the Morelli men manage to keep getting beautiful women to stay with them, even after they become abusive. Joe has used his powers on many girls-- I was but one of the hundreds that fell victim to him. Though the way he tells it, I've always been a special case-- I was his first victim.

Joseph Morelli had always been trouble. From the day he was born, he was up and down the streets of the Burg, picking on smaller kids and playing favourites with the older ones. He had a way of getting things from people-- toys, sweets, whatever he wanted. And his victims would keep coming back for more. The burg had already had a taste of the trouble that was to come- but it wasn't until the tender age of eight, that he began to fully utilize his power. It was just my luck that he worked it out the day we walked home from school together.

It was almost four o'clock by the time I was let out by Mrs Schultz, the dragon lady. She had kept me in a full forty five minutes after the bell went, making me right out "I will not make false accusations" twenty times. I might have got out after fifteen minutes, but I was then, only six. I was still having trouble remembering my ABC's. The word "accusations" was well beyond me. I finally managed to replicate the sentence from the board correctly over twenty wobbly lines. Mrs Schultz reluctantly let me go.

It wasn't like I'd even done anything wrong. Joyce Barnhard and I had been fighting again. She said my hair looked stupid, so I said her face looked stupid. Then she scratched me, so I pulled her hair. We tussled around on the ashfelt, still trading insults for a while, until the teachers came to break up the fight. I tried to explain that Joyce had insulted my honour, but she was too quick for me. She started crying and saying that I said her daddy didn't love her. I got in real trouble for that one. No one's allowed to say anything about Joyce's daddy, since he went to she shops to buy some milk, and never came back. My mommy says he left "that crazy woman" who is Joyce's mommy, and that she "wasn't surprised." But the thing was, I didn't say anything about Joyce's daddy! Well, not that time anyway.

Mary Lou, my bestest best friend, has said she'd wait for me at the school gate, so we could still walk home together. She wasn't waiting for me by the time Mrs Schultz let me go. I didn't blame her. The sun was warm, and the breeze cool. Not a cloud in the sky. No need for mittens. It was a perfect day and no-one wanted to spend it hanging around school all afternoon. Mary Lou probably went of with Sally and Josephine to buy candy or play dolls in the park. I would just have to walk home alone.

I hadn't gone more then fifty meters before I heard the sound of someone else walking behind me. Their shadow fell across me. I looked back. It was Joey Morelli. He skipped to catch up with me. "Well, well," he said. "Stephanie Plum."

"Hello, Joey Morelli," I said.

"What are you doing out of school so late?"

I frowned. My mother was probably going to ask that. I would have to lie to her, and say I was with Mary Lou in the park. But Joey Morelli could hear the truth. "Mrs Schultz made me stay in and write lines."

"The dragon lady," Joey said knowledgeably. "I had her in second grade. You're in first grade, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Mrs Schultz is the worst. She used to get me in trouble all the time," he said. "You just gotta get some dirt on her. Then she can't make you do anything."

"Get dirt on her?" I asked. Surely Joey didn't think throwing dirt on Mrs Schultz would make her stop giving me lines. She'd probably just give me more!

"You know, find out something about her that she doesn't like," he explained. "Then, if she tries to get you in trouble, you just bring it up and she stops."

This sounded like a very odd idea to me. I didn't think there was anything in the world that could stop Mrs Schultz from giving me lines to right. But Joey Morelli was older then me, so he was probably wiser. And I was about willing to try anything to avoid more lines. "How do I find 'dirt' on her?"

"You gotta dig around," he said. "Like, listen out to what she says to the other teachers, and stuff." I furrowed my brow. "Ok, you're probably not up to that yet. Tell you what, my brother Tony had Mrs Schultz when he was in third grade, and he found the best dirt on her. So, he told me. Now I'm gonna tell you." I prepared to listen eagerly. "But you gotta promise that you'll use this wisely."

"I will, I swear." I said.

"Now Ms Plum, there's no need to swear," Joey said. "What would your mother say. Just promise."

"Ok, I promise!" I was impatient to hear this 'dirt'.

"Alright." He stopped walking and looked around. We were walking down Morrison crescent, about half a block from school. Narrow burg houses lined both sides of the street. Though all of the houses were inhabited by families that went to school with us, none of the children were around. Joey deemed these conditions to be satisfactory. He leaned forward, bent down, and whispered to me, "Any time Mrs Schultz tries to get you in trouble-" I leaned closer to him, soaking up every word. "Just ask her, what she did during the war."

"Huh?" I said. "How will that help?" Joey Morelli was stupid for thinking that would stop the dragon lady.

"Just trust me!" Joey said, "It works."

I put my hands on my hips. "You're trying to trick me, Joey Morelli." I said. "My mommy says you're no good. That you're always playing tricks. I think you're trying to get me in trouble."

"It works, stupid, because Mrs Schultz is a German," he said. "They were the baddies in the war. She probably killed people and stuff, and she doesn't want anyone to know. Jeeze you're thick."

"Oh," I said. "And that will really work?"

Joey turned his head away from me and thrust his nose into the air. "I told you it would." And he started walking off without me.

I ran to catch up. "Hey, wait. Why are you out of school so late?"

Joey faltered, looking guilty. "I'm skipping soccer practice," he said.

"You play soccer?" I asked.

"No," Joey said. "That's the problem. My dad wants me to learn to play soccer real good. But I hate it. It's a stupid lame game. And I'm no good at it. My dad doesn't like it when I lose." For a moment I thought Joey Morelli looked a little bit afraid of something. But then it was gone. "So, I went to practice and then pretended I was sick, so they let me go." He grinned.

I felt a goofy grin spread across my face too. There was something about Joey Morelli that made me grin. I couldn't help it. Mommy said he was a bad kid. He was trouble. She said I should stay away from him. But he was so smart. He knew how to get out of soccer practice and stop Mrs Schultz for getting me in trouble. Plus, I liked talking to him. "Whacha gonna do now?" I asked.

"I dunno," he said. "But anything's better then soccer. Maybe I'll go down to Uncle Moes and get the older girls to buy me stuff."

"They do that?" I asked. Most of the older girls I knew were my sister's friends. They usually just chased me out of Valerie's room and slammed the door. Or else they tried to make me their "baby" when they played house. Valerie and her friends never bought me candy from Uncle Moe's.

"All the time," Joey said. "If I hang around and bite my bottom lip, they say I'm really cute, and buy me things. They don't just buy the penny candy neither. Some of them buy me those big round swirly lolly pops."

"Thats amazing. You must be really really cute for them to buy you those. My mommy won't even buy me those." It seemed to me like Joey Morelli could do anything. He could probably ride a two-wheeler with out training wheels, and spell "accusations" without looking at the board.

"I'd show you, but they probably wouldn't give me any lollies with you around," he said. "You're not cute enough." I was a little offended, but then, he was probably right. We'd walked almost all the way to my house, by now. I looked up the familiar street and realized we were in Fitzgerald Lane. Joey's street. And behind us was his house. The large cream two story building rose out of a slight hill, surrounded by a perfect bed of roses and chrysanthemums. I felt a little sad. Joey would probably go home now and I'd have to walk the rest of the way by myself.

"You can come to my house," Joey said, as if he had read my thoughts. "If you want."

I really really wanted to go to Joey Morelli's house. But I was also a little afraid. "I don't know, my mommy says I'm not allowed."

Joey grinned. "Yeah, because I'm a trouble maker, right?" I nodded. "Stephanie Plum, I've walked you almost all the way home and have I made any trouble?"

I thought about it. "No."

"Infact," he said, "haven't I taught you how to get out of trouble?"

Come to think of it, he had. Joey Morelli had been really nice to me all afternoon. He had walked me home when my friends have left me, even though he could have gone and got free candy from older girls. He'd told me how to stop Mrs Schultz getting mad with me. And he certainly hadn't caused any trouble or done anything bad (well, apart from skipping soccer practice. But if I had to go to soccer practice, I'd probably want to skip too). "No. You've been real good and nice to me all afternoon."

"So," Joey said. "Do you think I'm a trouble maker? Do you want to listen to your mommy, and stay away from me?" Heck no. Joey Morelli lent down, so he could look me in the eyes. "Or do you want to come to my house, and we can play choochoo in my dad's garage."

I was already caught, well and truly, in Joseph Morelli's trap. He had been playing me the entire way home. This whole thing had been a part of his game. If only I knew, if I only I could have seen through his tricks. But that was always my problem. I was easily coerced, and easily led. I was the perfect victim. "What's choochoo?"

Joey's eyes literally twinkled in delight. "If you come play, I'll show you." And then he smiled. It was a flawless, toothy, charming grin. All my resolve vanished.

"Well," I said. "Ok."

Joey Morelli grabbed my hand and pulled me towards his father's garage. "Just don't tell your mommy about this."