The gift of the shadows Chapter 6: That i love you, a harry potter fanfic

The restricted section definitely held the aura of darkness and foreboding, and Draco felt unease as he passed through the rows of books in search for something he felt sure he'd find perfectly well in the main library. Even though the golden sun was shining through the high windows, it didn't seem to reach the floor, and the tall bookshelves cast menacing shadows over him as he passed between them. The air was heavy with dust, floating in the light and resting on the spines of heavy tombs and tabletops, and he couldn't help but feel the thickness of the air as he breathed in and out.

He ran a finger along the spine of a book that he felt sure wouldn't start screaming at him (he'd made that mistake before) and looked at the dust covering him with distaste. No wonder nobody ever came in here, it was filthy, and most people would suffocate within minutes. If it weren't for his keen eyesight he felt sure that he wouldn't have been able to read the titles or even the library index, and even though he'd been there for over an hour the only thing he'd found was one rather old and thick book on magical creature studies.

He had gone to the headmaster only that morning, on Saturday none the less, and Dumbledore had conveniently suggested that they go and look through some books in his spare time. His words were along the lines of 'as you aren't doing anything' which was a complete lie as he had 3 essays to complete for the following Monday, and not forgetting trying to cling onto the last shreds of his social life.

Apparently that didn't count, and now he was stuck peering in the near darkness for a book he wasn't even sure was there.

Of course it didn't do any better when your help is far more interested in you than helping, as Potter currently was. He sighed again, it seemed to be becoming a bit of a habit with him now, showing his weaknesses, and letting that well perfected mask slip at times. What could have caused this- change? He was fine after his father was sent to prison, okay a little angry at Potter for sending him there, but that was understandable, his father may be a prick but he still held the Malfoys together. Hence his mother leaving, but he'd gotten over that, and had even received a postcard a few weeks ago. No, it was after he'd been to the school, after a certain brunette had come through those huge oak doors in the bloodied arms of another man. It was only after he'd talked to himself at his bedside and only after he'd had him watch him for days.

Why the hell was this happening to him? What the hell had he ever done? I mean, he was a bitch but that can't justify- this!

He picked up another book absently and slipped it into his arms without bothering to double check if there was even a title. This was getting extremely tedious, he'd been roaming about in the dark for ages and even his good eyesight was faltering. By now many people would have had to sit down and rested their eyes in the light, but being ¼ magical creature helped sometimes.

Harry stared at the bookshelf before him, trying to work his eyes endlessly over the grey dust and dull spines to keep his eyes occupied. He'd been in the library for hours and it was absolute torture, how would you feel when the one thing you want more than anything in the world stands around and teases you when you can do absolutely nothing about it? That's what Draco was doing, he didn't notice it of course, but the way he moved his hips or bent down on one knee to check the bottom shelf was taunting him. The way his face was shadowed in the darkness, the way his hair always seemed to shine, the way those eyes seemed at home in a book, it was all too much.

"Urg! I hate books!" Draco cried at last, breaking the heavy silence as he kicked at one of the bookshelves angrily. Harry knew that it was a lie, but he wasn't going to protest. Although he loved to be around him, even for the smallest amount of time, the line had been drawn for what was healthy for his sanity and what was not. Right now, it was not. All he needed was to read and maybe have a fly, something to get his mind away.

Without another word Draco picked up the two he'd found and began making his way through the darkness and shadows of the shelves toward one of the small tables that littered the library for anyone who ever came in there, which really wasn't many. Harry followed slowly behind, and tried to control those emerald eyes that found themselves locked onto Draco again.

He had the longest strides he had ever seen, they made him seem taller and more powerful, although Harry would never say that Draco wasn't anyway. When standing Draco only came up to about Harry's eyes, but the way he walked, he seemed like a giant, and Harry a mouse. He envied his movements, the way he could rule the world and stop all talk in the room with just a look. The way he tossed his hair when he was angry, the way that one piece fell before his piercing eyes and always ruined the glare he was giving, making Harry smile as Draco crossed his eyes to glare at it instead.

The way Draco rolled his hips with each time a foot touched the floor, it made Harry just want to grab them and turn him around, but he couldn't. He couldn't do anything! The only chance of being around Draco was to be quiet, keep his head down, because if Draco knew, then there was a chance that he'd be too freaked to go anywhere near him ever again. In a way he wished that he loved him like everyone else, but then again, it was Draco he loved, not another fan. That's the fun in it; he thought wryly as a small smile tugged at the edge of his lip, yes, he'd just have to make it interesting.

Draco slipped onto a dusty chair and for once didn't care whether his robes got filthy, he was tired, he was mind numbingly bored, and that annoying flutter in his stomach had been bugging him for hours. Something seemed like it was missing, and for the few moments he sat alone in the darkness, one small lamp lighting the side of his face, and it was only when the thing had returned when he realised what it was. As Harr-Potter walked into the room, that feeling diminished and his stomach did another back flip just to aggravate him further. He glared at it before slamming the heaviest book he had down on the table to show his annoyance, and sneezed.

Gar! Everything just had to bloody go wrong didn't it!

Harry smirked, that sneeze had definitely not been very masculine, it was small and sweet and he had trouble clearing his face as he slipped down opposite. It was little things like this about Draco that made him seem a little more human, instead of the angel that he was to the public. He smiled behind his own book to hide it from the blonde who was no doubt glaring, but really it was those things that he loved. He did, he loved that sneeze, he loved that little annoying bit of hair, he loved his faults as much as he loved the beauty and the face, the way he did everything. But the little things, they made him see that there was more hope in getting the angel than he had thought.

And he had a plan… an idea that would tell him if Draco was more willing than he made out to be, and in turn maybe reveal something to him. If Draco remembered that night in their dormitories, when his eyes had fluttered open momentarily, then he could show him and see if Draco reacted, if not, it wouldn't do any harm, would it? It was a chance he was willing to take, these feelings were insane and if he didn't do something soon, he'd explode.

Introduction

written by Fiddelous Dodge in the late 1700's-

Snore…. This was the most boring thing he'd ever had the displeasure of doing. Draco put his book flat down on the table and brought the light a little closer as he tried to peer at the index for any references he could copy down. The scanned the entire page twice and found nothing, just his luck it would seem, and he growled low in his throat as he glared at the browning page. However, his growl was cut off abruptly only to be replaced by silence and the flop of his stomach doing forward rolls due to the pressure suddenly put on the side of his leg. He hadn't realised he'd stopped breathing until his lungs began to protest and his muscles burned, and he let out a slow, long breath as he tried to clear his mind and skin of the tingling that had enveloped him.

Slowly and discreetly, he leaned a little further back into his chair and glanced under the table to see what he had thought. His knee had suddenly become a convenience for that damned Veela to lean his leg against, and he had to shake his head as he became a little light headed. He should have pushed it away, he should have kicked it from him, sworn at the menace and walked from the library, but he suddenly couldn't think of anything he'd want to do less. His stomach fluttered uncomfortably and his heart began beating faster, that tingling tickling his skin and making him shudder, and that pull that just made him want to… no!

'What are you doing?' he scolded himself as he glared intently at the same line as he read it over and over again. 'This bastard is stealing your body heat! He'd taking advantage!' the small part of him that seemed to be left insisted but he remained glaring at the page. 'But he's so warm…' the other, greater, half of him whined, and he shuddered as a tingle crept up his spine.

What the hell should he do? It was only a bloody touch but already it was sending him into blind panic! What in the name of Merlin was happening? I mean, come on! This was just bloody cruel!

"Fucking Veela," he muttered under his breath, and from the other side of the table Harry smirked from behind his book.

That was just the reaction he'd been hoping for, it had been a gamble, but his insides were glowing from gold as he hit the jackpot. Draco hadn't pushed him away! He'd taken the risk and now he was tingling all over as his heat entwined with Draco's, as their skin was only held apart by two thin layers of fabric. He could feel the shape of Draco's leg; he could feel the firm muscle of his shins, the bone of his kneecap. His eyes fluttered shut as he smiled into the pages of his book, his heart was slowly picking up a pace as the heat from Draco's body hit him in waves and he wanted nothing better than to put the book down. He wanted to look into those murky pools, he wanted to gaze upon that creamy porcelain, watch that liquid gold reflect the small lamp, as he knew it was.

Written by Fiddelous Dodge in the late 1700's-

written by Fiddelous Dodge in the late 1700's-

He couldn't stop his eyes from skirting over the same line over and over again as his brain forced him to try again. But all he could concentrate on was that touch, the warmth, the muscle, the tone, and the skin. He shuddered again, damn bloody fucking Potter, why couldn't that damn Veela stop putting out that damned charm!

Little did he know, that he was completely immune…

Harry let a wry smile tug at his mouth as he silently slipped off his shoes and imagined what Draco's reaction was. His leg was tense, but it was still there, and that was the point of the game.

Potter's leg… it was wonderful… it was slightly taller than his own, and in some desperation that he had no control over, he shifted his weight a little so that his shin would skirt against his and he could feel a little more. It was so… firm, toned- warm. He shuddered again- no! Bad Draco, no! This was just a damned trick, a damned bloody trick of Potter's to get the second best looking guy in school. It was just his shallow self trying to keep up appearances for the damned newspapers! Just a damned-ahhh…

Draco gasped silently as he stared harder at his book with wide eyes and tried to control the sudden churning his stomach was deciding to pull. P-P-Potter's leg had just wrapped around his own! H-He was doing a Vulcan mind mould again and he couldn't move! Damnation!

Harry slipped his foot around Draco's shin, shuddering and grinning from the other side of his book. This was the sort of touch he'd been waiting for, a touch while Draco was actually conscious, a touch that Draco knew about and he could reciprocate. His leg was so wonderful he wondered what the rest of him could be like, it was warm and muscular and even though he wasn't touching the skin he shut his eyes in bliss.

Written by Fiddelous Dodge in the late 1700's-

written by Fiddelous Dodge in the late 1700's-

Gah! It wasn't working, it was just too much! Draco wanted to run away, he wanted to leave and hide himself somewhere small and dark where no one could ever find him and clear his head. But at the same time all he wanted to do was lean over and- NO! He was weak! He was so damned weak he was buckling just because –ahahah! H-His leg… was being…r-rubbed!

Draco's eyes widened as he stared in shock at his book, now only a blur of browns and black and his mind raced and his stomach flipped again. His leg was in a bit of a venerable position at that moment, and a little… trapped. One of Potter's legs had found its way between his own to hook his foot around his shin and rub it slowly with the mere rotation of his ankle and somehow his trousers were slowly riding up. B-B-Bloody Potter! His stomach did another belly flop and his throat let out a small strangled noise at the back that he couldn't hold back in time, and knew too late that Potter had heard it too. Meep! He inwardly cried, as the foot had found its way underneath his knee in that rather sensitive patch near his tendons.

AAAAAAAAH! What in the name of Merlin was happening! He was letting this bloody happen! He was letting this- manwhore! Take advantage! He was fucking letting him! His throat let out another small whine as somehow his other leg got involved and he realised that he couldn't even read the whole line any more. He was a Malfoy! He shouldn't let this bloody happen, he was the one supposed to be in control! He was the one that made people melt at the knees, not the one to be fondled under the bloody table!

RIGHT, THAT'S IT! NOBODY FOOLS WITH A MALFOY!

With a loud screech he forcefully pushed back his chair and ripped his legs out of the death grip. Without an uttered word he bent down and ripped a piece of parchment and his quill from the small leather bag by his chair and leant over the table. He pushed down the book that Potter was holding up, and slammed both the book and his hands against the table before slamming the parchment and quill on the open page all the while glaring.

"Write!" he demanded and for the first time in weeks he forced the courage to look into those eyes. Harry- Potter was hot, but Potter had never dealt with a Malfoy! Harry looked back at him with those emerald green eyes, clouded with lust as his legs continued to tingle as his soul continued to warm him, but he managed to raise an eyebrow that outdid the flush on his cheeks.

"Dumbledore said you had to write what was happening so write! I'm going to find a book!" he finished and before Harry could protest, he strode from the table and disappeared into the darkness.

Harry leant back into his seat and sighed, a dreamy smile gracing his face as he stared up to see the golden light above his head. Draco took it all the way to the knee, he'd gotten under Draco's trousers, he'd run his toes over that soft skin and skirted over those firm muscles, he'd felt Draco shudder as he ran along his tendons, and he'd spoken to him at the end. Not only that- but he'd finally gotten to look into those beautiful stormy eyes, and more to the point those beautiful, confused, wanting, lusty eyes that had given him all of the answers he had needed.

Sod reading, he thought happily, this is bliss. And slowly he leant over and switched off the small oil lamp before closing his eyes and feeling the tingling like an egg being cracked on his head.

Draco strode down five aisles before he finally came to a rest and fell to the floor to stare wide-eyed and out of focus into the darkness. Bloody Potter! What a fucking bitch! He'd been molested! He'd been violated! A Malfoy!

But what was even more terribly disturbingly, horribly gut wrenchingly bad, was that he'd finally realised that he liked it, no- understatement. Potter, an idiot, a Gryffindor, Mr Perfect, Dumbledore's golden-boy, the thing his family had stood against for as long as time itself, and here he was, sitting in the darkness remembering a simple touch. If this wasn't some sort of spell, or hypnosis, or Veela charm, he may just have to kill himself.

Draco fell onto his back and sighed into the darkness, this wasn't happening- it was all a horrible dream. He sighed into his hands and shut his eyes to try and block everything out, but he just couldn't. That touch wouldn't be the last, he could feel it, and he welcomed it. The way that Potter seemed to know his weaknesses, know that he was extra sensitive, the way he moved his toes, the way he stroked and ran the right places. He shuddered again, and this was just his bleeding leg!

I mean- what would the papers say? They were probably going to have a field day alone when they find out he's not actually human, let alone gay! And him, Malfoy heir, Voldemort would probably want to use it to his advantage too. Being gay, or even being Veela weren't big deals in the wizarding world, but when you're Wonder Child, it's a different matter all together. Well- at least it would detour some of those stupid obsessive love struck girls, Merlin they were annoying. WHAT? He wasn't getting with Pothead! No way, no how! But its one thing to think it, but when his green eyes are all you think about and burn into the darkness when you try and fall asleep, it's a little harder.

He sighed and brushed himself off as he rose from the floor and continued to look for another book, but his mind was on one thing only. Those eyes, that smile, that stupid hair he suddenly had the urge to tug down, those rosy cheeks, those wandering feet. The way he walked, the way he flew, the way he grinned and looked at him with longing eyes from across the room. It'd better be that damned charm, or else.

…

Not that long after Draco had calmed himself down and had found a few more books, he came back to their table with his arms full and a small limp from when he'd kicked another bookshelf. Only to be met with darkness. The lamp had been extinguished and their table was empty, save the books and paper he'd left just as it was before. He scowled. Damned Potter! Distracting him, and then fucking off just to leave him to clean up! So that'd been it all along! He was taking advantage to rest his lazy pampered arse while he left Draco to clean up after him!

"Ungrateful slob," he muttered dryly as he placed the books on the table, ignoring the tingling that brushed his arms the closer he got. He slipped back into his seat and put his head in his hands, he didn't even know where half of these books came from let alone how he was going to carry them all or find his own way out.

Slowly Draco sank back into his seat, he was never going to be played again, ever! Potter was obviously still as much of an idiot as he had ever remembered him, and that wasn't going to change. However, he couldn't help but feel disappointed, and he still felt the tingling in his legs, the fluttering in his stomach, that endless feeling of light-headedness he got whenever he was around him.

Oh well, he thought as he sighed, I'll see better days. He ran a hand through his hair as he reached out to grab the extinguished lamp from the table and placed it in front of him, digging into the pocket of his nicely fitting trousers to pull out his wand. He fingered it for a few moments at he stared at the lamp, the darkness was strangely inviting, he could hide in it and think, but what good would darkness do when you have to lug books around? He let himself scowl as he muttered the incantation, and a small yellow flame erupted from the tip of his wand and caught alight on the wick, bathing him in an orange glow. Looking up now he could see that it was actually getting dark, the beams of light no longer golden but a misty blue- the colour of his eyes.

He frowned and looked back down, but seconds later felt his insides ice over. Quickly he jumped from his chair, sending it crashing to the floor, and held his wand out before him at the shadowed figure that sat opposite the very seat he'd been sitting in. the very same shadow that was familiar yet new, the shadow the he had only thought of as a dream. The shadow with those powerful lips, that touch that made him want to melt, the way it touched him with such softness and care that he felt the love he'd missed well up inside of him.

"You," he breathed, the hiss he'd intended losing its force as his other had strayed to his lips and he backed up against the nearest bookshelf.

"Me," the shadow agreed, nodding his head, and his insides iced for a different reason. His heart picked up and the hand around his wand suddenly became clammy as he dropped his other hand and stared at the shadow, half in shock, half in rage. That voice- that new yet familiar voice- that was Harry! Oh great, now he's switched to first name basis.

"I- I wanted to tell you- oh god I wanted to," the shadow began as he raised from his seat and Draco tried to back up a little further but already had gone as far as he could go. His heart was drumming in his chest and once more he had to shudder for that tingling that brushed his skin.

"Tell me what!" he tried to shout, but his volume only rose a little as his rage depleted to be left with the betrayal of being taken advantage of truly. The scowl on his face faltering with each step the shadow came closer, but he kept his wand trained.

Harry frowned, but Draco couldn't see it against his black outline, why had this gone so wrong? He thought he'd gotten through to him- thought he'd made his feelings clearer with his actions, but it was obvious that the violation he had done was simply too much. He wanted to beg for his forgiveness- but he knew he wouldn't accept it- he wanted to take him in his arms- but he knew he'd pull away. So he stopped merely three feet from Draco, letting the other boy's wand press against his chest as he submitted, and slowly he felt himself returning to normal.

Draco would have gasped had he not been shrouded in so many feelings that he was becoming confused, but the sight before his eyes really did weaken his will. As he melted back from the darkness he could see that his green eyes had lost their sparkle, and they were looking at him pleadingly as he pressed himself against his wand as though asking him to use it. His perfect face was beautiful against the orange glow, his ebony hair glowed in the darkness as he towered before him in all of his glory.

"That I love you, Draco," Harry whispered.

Before the words could sink in, Draco forced himself to turn away, and Harry watched in silence as the man he loved disappeared into the darkness, maybe for the last time.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

I'm cruel, I know! If I were a reader I'd cry, but luckily I'm in control of this sort of thing so I get to do it to other people! Hahaha!

Don't yell at me too much -

A little dickey bird told me that the site was all screwy last time, so thanks to all you who tried and tried until you got a review up, it really means a lot to me even though I treat you mean with all these endings!

And now…. You would never guess… I'm going to reply to your reviews!

Makalani Astral – yeh, damned computers always screwing about with me, its either that or typos!

Dark Angel's Blue Fire – yay! Another addict! I'm going to be made illegal soon!

Alea – ah, yes… I can never get too tired of the love you send my way, lol. Thanks for hanging in there until the site got better!

Youko Gingitsune – yeh, I tried really really hard to make them similar to the books but give them some new traits that I happen to be all right at writing! Glad you like the combo, keep reading!

jadestonedreams – ah yes, he got him alone thanks to sneaky Dumbles, but I doubt either of them expected that did they!

Felix-the-bandit – blinded by love, sigh, yeh, I love them being oblivious, it's so fun! Hope this one was satisfactory too…

CrAzYLoOn – I know! It's one thing Draco and Harry but Draco getting along with Hermione! Scandalous! You'll just have to keep reading to see how it goes thought, won't you!

triola – awww! I loved loved loved loved loved your review right back! I'm sooo glad you like this so much! Hope this chapter didn't ruin the fluff for you, but I can safely say that Harry don't give up that easily! I'm a sucker for compliments about my writing, and you just hit the jackpot, I'm glad I make you go all warm and fluffy, I make me too! Woo! Go you and your review!

kt – YAY! Another review that made me all fluttery! Thank you thank you thank you! Don't rip anything up next time you can't review though, I don't want you injuring yourself, lol! Then you wouldn't be able to type, would you, and not being able to type means not able to review and in your words 'THIS STORY NEEDS REVIEWS!'

firefairy42- ha-ha! Just fly the union jack dhal! The English flag is so associated with football now It's lost its spark, but thanks for waving something none the less! YOU WANT MEE TO GIVE TIPS? MEE? Wow… I mean… what an honour! I'd love to! Anything you want help with I'll be right there at your feet with huge puppy-dog eyes! Ha-ha, yeh, just e-mail me or something about it, or review about it, I dunno… you decide!

Caelistes – don't burst a fuse love, you're as magic as they come! Ah, but will Dray really be the submissive, that is the question… you saw how Harry leant against his wand, he was giving himself! Hah! That should get you thinking shouldn't it… just read on and don't yell at me too much for the rather amusingly cruel ending…

midnightprowler – you know, unwillingly you and others are giving me really good ideas here. You're just going to have to read on… yeh, I liked the shadow Veela thing too, generally why I used it, lol… read on!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND for the little people! Or big people, I dunno… tell me if your big or small and I'll mention it! Haha! I'm ranting… anyway, a big hug and thanks to bunk64, HecateDeMort (the reviewer of few words), Earthwytch, xmenstoryguy, LiLy MaLfOy13, Moongypsy04 and Beth5572 READ ON! WOO!