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Glorfindel walked through the doors silently into the library. It was a warm afternoon and most of Rivendell's population was outside, enjoying the warmth and sunlight. He could hear the laughter and merriment of his fellow elves, but he didn't let it touch his soul. At the moment, he needed solitude in which to simply think and simply be, before he fell into a hole of despair. He didn't want to let this eat away at his soul, but that is all it had done for many years. And for him to feel the strain of his age was a very serious sign.
There was some part of him that was increasingly worried for his health and his welfare, but the rest of him just didn't care. He could feel the guilt and regret with each step he took, it whispered to him through every shadow and every beam of light. It reminded him of seeing his friends' bodies strewn through Gondolin when the Balrogs attacked. Though there were only six attacking at the time, there could have been one thousand for all the destruction they left in their wake.
He let out a shaky breath as his knuckles turned white, gripping a shelf to keep himself from falling over in his weakness. He blinked away the memories of seeing Ecthelion fall from the mountainside as his feet too had slipped. He shuddered, the sensation of falling coming over him. He let out a slow breath and looked amongst the books, running his nimble fingers over the ageless bindings and fading gold lettering.
"Looking for something?" Erestor asked from where he sat several feet away. He had been watching Glorfindel since he had entered the library. The dark-haired advisor to Lord Elrond always could detect a presence in his library and he was becoming worried at the look of guilt on the once carefree blonde elf.
"No." Glorfindel replied with a curling of his lips.
"Then why are you not outside? It is a fine day, and there is singing and dancing and I believe I heard several requests for your fine voice with Lindir's accompaniment." Erestor said, placing the book he had been reading down and standing up. He walked over to Glorfindel. "You don't look well."
"It is… stress. I have had to double up patrols and put each new patrol on double the normal patrolling time. We have lost many elves recently and it grieves my heart." The blonde lied easily. It was becoming easier to dissuade someone from asking him further how he was.
But that sort of thing never got past Erestor. "Don't lie to me." He said mildly. "I do not like deceit, especially from a friend such as you. Tell me what is bothering you."
Glorfindel had a second lie to back up his first and would have put it into play if two-year-old Estel had not run in and started to call out to them. The two elves went to the small boy who was now accompanied by Elladan and Elrohir. The two heirs of Imladris had taken to the human and were acting like regular big brothers. It was endearing.
"What is it?" Glorfindel asked, an amused smile perched precariously upon his face.
"Wanna song!" Estel said with a bright grin. "Come sing!"
Elladan grinned, nodding. "Lindir wants you to sing the Lay of Luthien with that… oh, what was it he said?"
"I believe he said garbage voice." Elrohir supplied his brother, an evil grin on his face.
"I must decline your request." Glorfindel said smoothly.
"What?" Estel craned his neck, trying to see the tall elf's face from his lower viewpoint.
"No." Glorfindel crouched down and tweaked the small boy's ear.
"Why?" The toddler asked, his silver eyes wide and questioning. "I like hearing you sing! And L… L… the singer person is good on the string thing."
The Balrog Slayer, like most elves and men on Middle Earth, could not say no to the adorable face of Estel. He sighed, and stood up. "Alright. One song and then I get to dump a pie onto Erestor's head." He said in such a serious voice, Erestor feared he was telling the truth. Perhaps he was.
The four elves and human child journeyed back into the sunshine where Lindir was tuning his ten-stringed lyre. The elf grinned and started to twang the familiar, lingering tune that quieted every elf within earshot. Glorfindel took off his formal robe and tossed it onto the ground and readied his voice. He closed his eyes and let the words simply come from his mouth.
"The leaves were long, the grass was green,
The hemlock-umbels tall and fair.
And in the glade, a light was seen
Of stars in shadow shimmering.
Tinuviel was dancing there
To music of a pipe unseen
And the light of stars was in her hair
And in her raiment glimmering."
Glorfindel opened his eyes as he finished the first verse and glanced at Estel. The little boy's jaw had dropped and his eyes were shining with interest and gladness. The human boy would never know but that look of intense hopefulness and innocence closed the wound created by his own lack of hope and something swelled in his breast as he launched into the second verse, his lighter bass voice filling the air. His own dark emotions were eased for that brief moment in time as he told the tragic story of an elf-maiden and a human, not knowing that he would soon sing of the love between that small boy in Elrohir's lap and the beloved lady who still grieved under the great mallorn leaves in Lothlorien.
