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Chapter 5

Natalie walked outside of the hospital as John walked along side her, neither saying a word. They glanced at each other a few times but no words.

They came to the crime scene and Natalie motioned to one of the officers that it was all right for John to be there. Slowly they walked closer to the vic lying on the ground. Natalie grabbed into her purse and pulled out a set of latex gloves, put them on and squatted down by the Victims body.

John watched as she seemed to be studying the victim intently. He watched her turn the victim slightly and she saw the cuts to the Dr's throat, she already knew it was a doctor, she could tell. He had his Dr's coat on and that was most likely the reason why he was killed, her theory from earlier was playing out. This sicko was targeting Dr's at Llanview Hospital for whatever reason. A reason she knew they had to figure out, and soon.

Bo approached the scene and saw John.

"Hey John" Bo said, greeting John and then shook his hand

"Bo" John said as they both smiled weakly at the other and turned to see Natalie once again looking over the victim. She stood in thought and called out to an officer.

"Sneider, who was the first person to go over the Vic?"

"Rodgers" the officer said and Natalie nodded her head, "Send him here. I have a few questions," she told him as she walked away a bit to talk to Rodgers. After a few minutes she began canvassing the area again.

John walked around the scene himself, doing the same as she, evaluating things, trying so desperately to come up with something anything. An hour or so passed and they both seemed to be so caught up in their own heads, thoughts, and scenarios that while walking back and forth they just ran into each other.

"Oh…Sorry" Natalie told him, not seeing him walking in her path and ran right into him. He blinked for a second as he felt their bodies collide. It froze him as it happened.

"No, I'm sorry it's your crime scene. I should've been more careful," he told her and she smiled briefly. She looked into his eyes and she vowed never to look into them again. She stared for what seemed like eternity but was only a matter of minutes.

John stared back into her beautiful blue eyes. Those beautiful eyes that he loved to look into so much. He missed them, he thought, her eyes, her. He saw she couldn't seem to break away from the hold his eye's had on her, and deep down inside of him he didn't want her to. Their staring was like old times, it felt right.

"Ms. Buchanan?" and officer asked and knew he was breaking up sometime but he had a job to do. Natalie blinked and she regained her senses as her eye's moved from his.

" I need you to sign off on some of this evidence," the officer asked and she gave him a nod as she walked away with him.

John stood a few feet away from her as she spoke with the officer. He smiled, damn! How was it she looked even more beautiful after all this time. He saw her finish and look over to him, she saw him staring.

"Good Night John" she told him as she walked closer to him

"Are you going to the station?"

"No, nothing to do there till the coroners done his job and the reports are in" She told him as she started slowly walking away towards the hospital.

John walked a few feet behind her as she entered the hospital. He knew she was probably going to see his brother. For some reason they seemed to have become even better friends since he was gone, since he left. John didn't say a word and he saw her look into his room.

Natalie knew he was behind her but she wanted to make sure Michael was all right before she went home for the night. She looked into the window of his room; Marcie and Ron had obviously left. Which was a good thing; they both needed some rest. She continued to look in on him as she felt John's breath on her.

"He's lucky, huh? I mean to have you as such a good friend. You certainly are one of the most loyal people I've ever known," he asked her and she turned confused for a minute.

"Loyal?" she asked him and he shook his head.

"Yeah, you were always loyal to me. Someone I could always count on and that I knew was there for me when I needed someone" he told her and she was sucked in. she wasn't sure what exactly she was feeling, his soft tone was making her weak at the knees but his words just weren't right. She knew she should just keep her mouth shut but she just couldn't.

"Yeah, I was loyal. I was there for you, too much. I put myself on the line, my heart out there for you time and time again" she said and she paused for a second. She wasn't sure if she should go on or not.

"It's funny..." she made a small chuckle" after all this time, I figured you probably looked back sometime over this past year at least once, or maybe you didn't. But... its funny... of all the things you remember, you remember I was loyal." she said and she started walking away from him. She walked over by some chairs a few feet away from Michael's room and she sat down, pulling her arms around her chest protectively.

"Its not the only thing I remember Natalie. I remember it all, every little bit. Its actually those memories that I hold deep inside still to this day."

"Yeah, well...the memories that I have. They're not such fond ones. I try not to relive them, or to remember them much, and you know why" she told him and he now sat next to her in the chairs.

"Yeah, I know why and I'm still sorry. I really didn't mean to cause you any pain," he told her

"Really? Cause it seems like you did quite a few times. Actually... it's probably my fault. I stuck around so long. It was probably just my mistake for caring so much about you. I think it blinded me to the fact that you were incapable of love for me. My mistake for thinking if I loved you enough, showed you that you deserved love, that you would be smart enough and realize it someday but...I..." Natalie was cut off by his words

"It wasn't you, you didn't make any mistakes. It was me, my mistake for leaving you and Michael. For not telling you things I should have," he told her and she finally after all this time looked over at him, she looked into his eyes quickly, and they were a bit watery. She looked away not wanting to get sucked in, not wanting to do this any longer. She shook her head clear.

"It sounds like you may regret things with you brother and... If that's true than this is your chance to make it right, to undo some of those mistakes" she told him as she stood. She walked again near Michaels door and looked in.

"Maybe I'll get the chance to undo all my mistakes," he told her. He put his hands on her shoulders and gently turned her to face him.

Natalie heard his words and she knew what he was implying. She felt the electricity run thru her body as he turned her but she needed to ignore it. Staring into his eyes she knew she needed to be strong. She wasn't that same person any longer. She wasn't the person that had loved him so much before. She had moved on from him and was in love with someone else. She saw him lean into her mouth; place a gentle kiss on her lips.

John knew he shouldn't kiss her. She had been hurt so much by him already in the past. She had moved on, just like what he wanted for her. She was happy and was in love with someone else but he just couldn't help it. He couldn't be this close and not taste her, not feel her lips. He leaned in and gave her a gentle but sensual kiss on the lips.

"You can't just do this to me now John. I won't let you," she told him softly, almost a whisper as she pulled out of his kiss.

"I know," he said back softly as they continued to stand with in inches of each other, staring.

"I'm with someone else. I'm in love with him," she told him and her words would have stung a few minutes ago but they didn't at this moment. Not after he kissed her, not after he felt what he was sure she felt. That same connection they always had, was still there.

"And you're happy, I know that. I'm happy for you, that's all I've ever wanted for you" he told her and she got a bit teary. They started staring for a few minutes as he noticed a piece of hair fall in front of her face and John couldn't not touch it, not move it. He gently raised his hand and pushed it behind her ear.

Natalie couldn't take her eye's off of him, she wanted to, but she just couldn't. Finally she formed words.

"I need to get home to Ron," she told him and before she was able to start walking they heard Ron's voice.

"No you don't. I'm right here," Ron said as he walked a bit closer to them.