A/N: A few more chapters and the torture will be over – I promise. Blame my parents for encouraging my creativity and over active imagination. My sappiness? Don't know who to blame for that – it just…is. ;) Within all the LynnieLillyEthan drama here's what really wrong with Caleb.

Until 50 – enjoy! xox - G

Chapter Forty-nine

"I have a question for you – because I'm dying to know. Just how long do you expect me to keep quiet?" Livvie asked as she gazed at Caleb from the doorway.

"I don't have time for this Olivia." He sighed as he stood and moved to stare out the window.

"Make time, Caleb." She snapped back at him. "And stop calling me Olivia in that condescending tone. Keep it up and I'll only answer to Livvie from now on..."

"OK. Livvie. If that's what you want…" He replied, his voice dangerously soft.

There were times he could be so loving she almost forgot how cold and cruel he could be. "It's not what I want – Caleb." She said, her eyes filling with tears. "I want you to talk to me. You haven't talked to me – not really – for months."

Silence was her answer.

Taking a deep breath she tried again. "You don't have to go through this alone, Caleb. I'm right here." Livvie reached out to grab hold of his sleeve. "Please." She begged as she gave it a tug. "Tell me what you're thinking. I used to always know. Now I don't know anything anymore."

"Olivia…" Caleb sighed as he turned to face her. He drew her close and she sank against him.

Livvie's voice was broken with sobs as she clung to him. "You tell me you trust me. But you never show me Caleb. I just want to help you and you won't let me."

"It's not that simple Olivia. You don't understand…" He began to explain.

"Then help me to understand." She cried. "Please Caleb. This is killing me."

"I don't want you to worry." He replied.

"I'm already worried. If you talk to me you can only make it better – not worse. It can't be any worse Caleb." Livvie insisted.

It took everything he had to get the courage to answer her honestly. "Sit down my love." He whispered into her hair. "I give up. I'll tell you."

"Everything?" She asked as she wiped at her eyes.

"Yes." He nodded. "Everything…"

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Grant walked slowly through the door, listening to the sounds of Ethan working. Since Lynnie left no one had seen him in weeks.

Danny had tried to reason with him last, an attempt that was far from successful. He had found Ethan half drunk and inconsolable. The evening ended with Ethan throwing his glass at the mantle and Danny out the door.

Something must have changed because Ethan was busy working at the moment. Thankful for small favors, Grant waited till there was a lull in the sawing before he made his presence known. "Business must be good." He called out softly.

Ethan stopped what he was doing and gazed over at him, a weeks worth of stubble shadowing his jaw. He pushed his goggles up off his face before he answered. "Yeah. It seems I still have that."

"Just thought I'd check in." Grant made his way through the jumble of furnishings until he stood directly across from Ethan. "No one's heard from you in a while."

"And apparently no one's heard from my wife either." Ethan replied, his voice incredibly bitter. "Although maybe they have – but no one sees fit to notify me."

"Ethan…"

By way of response he was cut off sharply. "Nevermind. I've got it Grant. I understand. The going gets tough the Donovans and the Koviches rally around each other and the rest of us are left standing in the cold."

"That's not what's happening here Ethan." Grant took a deep breath. "It's just that Lynnie…"

In an instant Ethan closed the distance between them. His eyes were full of hurt and anger as he backed Grant up against an unfinished desk. Ironically it was a scene close to the one that occurred the day the two first met – which was the day that Ethan met Lynnie.

"Don't you dare say her name." Ethan warned him. He realized how crazy he sounded but still couldn't help himself. He didn't think he could bear hearing the sound. Ashamed he stepped back a bit as he continued. "Just…please…don't…"

Grant was the one person among them that knew exactly what it was like, he knew just the type of pain Ethan was going through. "OK. OK." He whispered.

Unable to leave without doing what he came here to do, Grant tried again. "I'm here because I know, Ethan. I know what it's like. Not what it's like to lose the baby – I don't know that – but I can imagine. Life without Melissa is incomprehensible to me. But I know what it's like to be left behind. Chloe never left Port Charles but she was as far away from me as…" Grant wanted to abide by Ethan's wishes so he refrained from saying Lynnie's name. "Chloe was just as far away from me as she is from you."

"So it's true." Ethan replied as he slowly took off his gloves. He hung his head as he sank into a chair. "She's actually left town."

"Yes." Grant nodded.

"I figured - I just – I guess I just hoped she was hiding someplace near here." Ethan stuttered a bit as the thoughts flew through his mind. "Like…Colin's grandfather's cabin or…the one Danny's dad keeps. But I knew better. Deep down I knew." He blinked back tears and stared across the room – his eyes unfocused. "I felt it the moment I realized she was gone."

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Lynnie felt stronger by the day. Since she'd landed it seemed she'd cried every hour but the times she'd caught herself seemed fewer and farther between.

She spent her days either working in her grandfather's study, laughing when he'd come in and sneak cigars or at her Aunt Gwen's bookshop, a near carbon copy of the one her mother ran at home.

Gwen was the one who got it. She always had been. Years and years ago - at a time her mother was grieving Gwen had been the one to help Abby pick up the pieces and move on. Now she was doing the same thing in helping Lynnie. To all involved it only seemed fitting.

If Ethan was thinking more clearly he'd know how to find his wife in an instant. It was only pain that clouded his judgment and kept him so in the dark.Thinking of him, wondering what he was doing right now, Lynnie wandered to the back of the bookshop. She paused at the travel section, her eyes narrowing in on a single book, which was nestled between guides of New York City and Niagara Falls.

As she pulled it from the shelf and began to flip through a voice called out from behind her. "I caught your mother with a book like that nearly thirty years ago." Gwen said with a smile. "Who knew Port Charles was such a tourist attraction?"

"It's really lovely, Aunt Gwen…" Lynnie began.

"Yes dear. I know. I've been there often throughout your lifetime." She replied as she tweaked Lynnie's nose. "Speaking of which – when are you going back there?"

"I've been thinking about that lately." She said with a sigh.

"And...?" Gwen prompted.

"And I think it might be sometime soon." Lynnie whispered as she moved to the couch and sat down. "I miss him…" She admitted as she closed the book in her lap and ran a hand gently over the cover.

"Of course you do." Gwen laughed. "He's a living doll."

Lynnie's lips twisted into a half smile as she gazed at the older woman, still so vibrant and lively even with her heavily wrinkled face and her hair threaded with gray. "How come you never settled down Auntie G?"

"Good question." Gwen said with a laugh. "Too much of me for one man to handle I guess."

She gazed over at her namesake and cleared her throat. "So. You done hiding?"

Lynnie's eyes snapped open wide. "We just talked about that. I said I'd go back soon."

"Soon is good. So c'mon. Give me a date." She pushed further.

"I-I-I don't know. Three or four weeks from now I guess." Lynnie stammered.

"Another month?" Gwen's eyebrows rose. "Not that I don't love having you around honey but you've been here nearly two already."

"I know that." She replied, bowing her head again.

"And you say you miss him…" Gwen kept on. "Must not miss him that badly if you can stand to stay away that long."

"No. You're wrong. I do miss him. More than anything…" Lynnie whispered in reply.

"When you were young your mother worried, that you were so taken in by the stories you read that it kept you from actually doing." Gwen whispered as she grabbed for her hand and gave it a squeeze. "So - enough. Stop reading about the place you call home and go back there already."

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"She just needs time, E." Grant whispered as he watched the emotions filling Ethan's face. "She just needed some time to figure this out without you."

"I don't understand. I thought she needed me. I want to be there for her." Ethan shook his head.

"People have been taking care of her her whole life. Her parents, Lia, Quinn, even Aidan in a way. But no one outside of them understands her as much as you do. Think about it Ethan. Lynnie knows that both of you are hurting and she doesn't want you to take this all on alone."

"But I want to…" Ethan continued to protest.

"And she wants something else." Grant cut him off. "It sucks, Ethan. I'm not going to tell you it doesn't because it definitely does. I don't know what your life with Lynnie is like – that's something that only the two of you know for sure – and that's exactly the way it should be. But I know that you can't make her come back until she's ready. And she will be – soon. You just need to be patient."

"It's not easy…" Ethan replied, his voice defeated.

"No." Grant nodded. "It's not. But if you don't believe anything else I say believe this. When she comes back – as rough as this is? It'll all be absolutely worth it."

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"I should have realized there would be consequences…" Caleb began as he sat in a chair across from Livvie. He was close enough to be able to touch her but refrained at the moment. He needed to get this said first.

"From wishing on the ring?" Livvie finished his sentence. Her voice rose in desperation. "I'm sorry – that's my fault…"

"Olivia – please." He said with a slight roll of his eyes. He ran a hand across his face and tried again. "I'll only do this if you promise to hear me out before you start jumping to conclusions."

"I'm sorry." She nodded and stared into her lap.

His lips curved a bit, knowing that Livvie was doing her best not to let him have it. She looked serene and demure but Caleb could see that her delicate hands were curled into fists and her breathing was labored. It was what he loved about her most, the way she was his match in every way.

"When we've wished on the ring – even in the state it's in now – our motives have always been selfish." Caleb began again. "As they should be, seeing as those harp players think that they've put one over on us."

"They had no right…" Livvie's voice shook with rage.

"Given that my father gave them the opening, I would have been disappointed if they hadn't attempted." He replied. "And look at what we've gained. Colin and Rachel. They exist because of them. Before Rafe's old man meddled that was the only wish that ring wouldn't grant. Now…" Caleb breathed as he finally reached for Livvie's hands, prying her fingers open and resting her palms against his. "Now we have everything."

She was calming down a bit but she knew there was more to the story. "If that's not it what is it then?" Livvie's heart began to race. "You can't hide this from me. Something's happening Caleb. I know it."

"You're right." He replied with a nod. "There is more." He took a steadying breath as he continued. "There was a choice I made. A selfless choice."

"You chose to let Colin turn back." Livvie replied, her eyes wide.

Caleb shook his head. "True but my motives weren't entirely unselfish. It was what you wanted, Olivia and my happiness is tied to yours for eternity." He decided to get right to it. Drawing it out was torture. "I've been trying to find the reason and I keep coming back to one thing. It's what I did for Katrina…"

She knew it had weakened him but she never dreamed it would do this much damage. "All of this is because you gave a sample of your blood?"

Caleb shook his head at her again. He held her face gently in his hands and pleaded at her with his eyes as they bore into hers.

"No, my love. All of this is because I did something for someone else, for the daughter of my sworn enemy without benefit to myself. I did something…human." He said with a shiver.

"And now – I think my worst nightmare is coming true." His voice was barely audible as he finished. "I'm actually becoming one of them."