Hello everyone. Aren't one-shots awesome?This one is now a double feature. The first is based on vol 7 of trigun maximum. Those of you who haven't read it, it's probably not going to make a lick of sense...The second one is THE WORST END-OF-ANIME FANFIC EVER! It's just for fun.
Enjoy.
What's in a name?
He'd planned it out for months...the glorious revenge that would save him and his brother. They didn't deserve to live. They didn't even deserve to die in their sleep. It was too simple...too painless...too respectful.
Still...he didn't want to risk landing and having some of the filthy weeds taking root.
He sat at the console, contemplating the instructions he'd typed in. He thought about the reason. She hadtold him, so openly, expecting his forgiveness, like what had happened to her was just some big mistake and now she planned on making it right by hiding him and his brother among them.
Hiding among the filth, the murderers, the ones who would kill him and his brother if only they knew the truth...
He would have none of that, but listened to the story anyway. He listened to all that had happened when he was unconscious: his brother had refused food, intent on dying to avoid dissection. He had even lashed out, quite uncharacteristically, against Rem, stabbing her in the stomach. Truth be told, wiping out the entire human race hadn't even occurred to him until he heard that his very own twin had lashed out against their adoptive mother.
But once the idea struck, it took hold of him like nothing he had ever felt before. This was not about revenge any longer. It was about good and bad, right and wrong. It was about snuffing out a horrible plague that threatened everything in the universe.
And to have the ability to see his desires through...now that was an honor.
He sat still, meditating on what would come to pass in the next few hours. He and his brother would leave with that woman, and only because she meant so much to his brother. He supposed one by itself couldn't pose any threat to the entire universe. Her survival was statistically insignificant.
His finger poised over the return key, the single button that stood between him and his righteous plan, he thought of the plants that these humans had enslaved. He would be their liberator. He would christen himself in the humans' blood. He would be reborn a savior. He would strip everything away, even his very name, every bit of human tarnish that dulled his superior brilliance.
A new name...a new name. What to call himself. He chuckled at this bit of arrogance, but he reasoned the plant sisters would want to know the name of their savior, and wouldn't settle for the ordinary human one the filth had bestowed upon him, a family name, one of the brothers she'd had to leave behind on Earth.
He thought back to his brother, and hit the return button. The computer beeped appreciatively.
He would finish them off where his brother had started...with Knives.
The Simple Life
Vash comes home, throws his brother's comatose body on the floor. Meryl jumps into his arms.
"You're back! Oh yeah...I'm really a plant! And I love you!"
"Wow, cool! Me too, let's make babies."
Milly pops her head out, spoon in mouth, pudding cup in hand.
"Babies! Oh, Hey Vash. BTW, I don't hate your bro, and that's great guys, because I'll need someone to play with my little tike who I made with Wolfwood."
Wolfwood leans around door frame. "Hey Spikey. Surprise! I'm here, too."
Vash turns, "You? Wolfwood? Who knew? And what was that Knives! Are you coming to, and did you just tell me telepathically that you're not a human hater anymore?"
Knives shakes his head in shame. "Yes...yes...that's exactly what i'm saying, you big, dumb, lovable, idiot. Let's all live in love and peace forever.
Just then, the local mysterious hottie pops her head in the door. "Hey, I'm this hot girl with no boyfriend and I develop symptoms of Stockholm Syndrome every easily...I love jerks. Also, I am a plant and I want to make babies. Does anybody here fit the bill?"
Knives raises his hand. "Yo."
Vash starts crying, reaching for his never-exhausted supply of donuts. "It's the Eden I always imagined! Now we'll be happy forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and..."
THE END :)