Chapter 17
The next morning it was raining when Charlie woke up. In the event of rain his running class would instead use an indoor track. Since Charlie had the advantage of showing up when he wanted, he instead chose to stay and use the gym for his running time. That gave him until 11:00 to report to his office.
His dad and Don were still sleeping when he awoke but by the time he changed into his sweats, his dad was waking up.
"I'm not going into work until later Dad. I am heading for the gym downstairs and should be back in an hour or so." Charlie got his ipod and went down to the first floor.
Just over an hour later, Charlie stepped off the treadmill. While doing his cool downs another resident came into the gym. He got on some gloves that were lying nearby and headed toward the punching bag. He saw Charlie and grinned. "Great stress reliever and I just had a fight with my wife. Letting off steam is why I come here."
"Running works for my stress, but I can see how a punching bag would help as well."
Charlie went back to the apartment. His dad had made french toast and eggs and he and Don were just sitting down.
"Good timing, how did the work out go?"
"It was just fine. Dad, if you go out today, I hope you brought an umbrella. I haven't gotten one yet."
"I was thinking of waiting until tomorrow to go out. It could rain all day and I think cooking and freezing those dinners is a better way to spend a rainy day and Charlie, I brought you an umbrella."
After eating, Charlie headed to the bathroom for his shower and to get ready for work.
Charlie and Don left the apartment at ten fifteen as planned. On the way out Alan handed Charlie a lunch bag and an umbrella. Charlie rolled his eyes.
Don thought this was not a good time to talk to Charlie. He did not want to distract him and so the trip to NSA was done mostly in silence, except for the Tom Petty CD that was already in the player when they got in.
Charlie drove to the main entrance of the building. As he put the car in park and got out he told Don "there's a map in the glove box if you need it and I'll meet you right here at this door at about 7:20. I left that lunch that dad fixed in the backseat so lunch is on me today. Have fun."
When Charlie got to into the building, he first went up to see Diane. "Hey Diane."
"Hi Charlie, how is everything going?'
"Good, I skipped the running class today since it was raining and indoor tracks do not help settle my mind like running on other terrains do. I called my dad on Father's Day and he and Don hopped a plane the next day and are now staying with me for the rest of the week."
"That's great Charlie. I'm glad you've make contact and I am amazed at how fast they came to see you."
"I think Don had a hand in that. Probably convinced Dad that I was starving and living out of a shopping cart or something."
Diane laughed. "Well, whatever the reason, I'm glad they could make it."
"Dad asked that I stop and invite you to dinner on Friday."
"I would love to go Charlie. I haven't seen your father or Don in a while."
"I'm going to skip my last class that day. Dad said dinner would not be until after six but you can come whatever time you leave here. He told me to ask if you like brisket."
"I love it Charlie."
"Great, he's famous for it back home. I'll see you Friday evening then. I better get to the office and get a jump on what I'm going to be covering today."
Since getting to DC Charlie had steadily been putting the weight back on that he had lost. At the Tae Kwon Do class today, Agent Schneider, or Vic that he asked to be called worked with Charlie on his moves. "Charlie I am really impressed with how fast you have advanced. You are my star student right now. You're a natural."
"Thanks Vic, I enjoy learning all of the new moves and then putting them into practice." Charlie was proud of how well all of his classes were going. He knew that in weight training, he had made a lot of improvement since he started. He was realistic enough to know that he would not be a star student there, but he was making his own advancements and that was fine with him.
Don was waiting for Charlie went he exited the building at just after seven. He was leaning against the car.
"Charlie, this was probably not a good idea. Apparently the NSA frowns on cars parked in front of the building like this. I showed them the car was registered to you and showed them my badge but they have been sitting looking at me like I have a car bomb. Next time, maybe you could give them the details when I need to pick you up."
"I never even thought about all that. If you need the car again, there is a small restaurant over on the next block that has a TV in the bar that I could meet you at. I haven't been there on this trip, but I've been there several times in the past. We can drive that way tonight and I'll show you where it is." Charlie into the driver seat and started the car.
After pointing out the restaurant to Don, Charlie asked him how his day went.
"It was a good day. I have a few friends with FBI here and stopped in. There is one agent that I owed a favor to and bought him lunch."
"You spent a day of your vacation at another FBI building?"
"Not all day. I had a few errands to run and saw a few sights. I fed most of your lunch to the wildlife of DC. They, at least appreciated it."
"Geese Don, you fed my lunch to geese?"
"It was the only wildlife around and they don't like pickles by the way. Anyhow, this way you can tell Dad the lunch was appreciated."
Charlie had to admit it was better than the line he would have probably used had his dad asked.
When they walked off of the elevator that evening, there were some fabulous aromas intermingled throughout the hallway.
After opening the apartment door, Charlie noted that they all seem to originate in his kitchen. "Hey Dad, smells great in here."
Hey Don and Charlie, I've been cooking all day. There's some beef stew that'll be done shortly. I'm just putting cornbread in the oven now."
"Sounds good. I'm going for a quick swim and will be back in about twenty minutes."
"Twenty and not a minute more Charlie."
Charlie changed and went to the roof for his laps. He was easily doing twenty laps now, but he did not want his dad to have to wait so he did not try for more. The overcast sky was not very inviting to spend more time in the water anyway.
Charlie changed his clothes and showed up at the table with his hair still wet. "I've missed your cooking Dad."
Don joined them at the table.
"All you have to do is come home Charlie and you can have my cooking every night again."
"I know. I will get back as soon as I can, but as I've said, it may take some time to finish this project."
Don had been thoughtful during dinner and did not say much. "Hey Charlie, after we eat do you want to take a walk over to that park?"
"Too many bugs this time of day. How about after my workout we meet on the rooftop. There's chairs around a pool up there and not a lot of people use that one."
"Care if I change and head to the gym with you and then we can both go to the roof?"
"That's fine with me."
Charlie helped his father clean up. There was food in the oven, no doubt to be frozen when it was done.
Charlie and Don had both changed into clothes to work out in. Both were wearing sweatpants and t-shirts. Charlie went to the treadmill and Don headed for the weights.
He put his ipod on and tuned out the rest of the world. While Charlie stayed on the treadmill Don had been making the rounds with the equipment. Don was ready to leave and Charlie was still running. He sat on a bench and waited for his brother to finish. He looked at his watch. An hour and a half. How could anyone run non-stop for an hour and a half at the pace that Charlie was keeping? The incline changed several times but the pace seemed to be the same. Don noticed that while Charlie did not even see him standing nearby, there was a peaceful look on his face. His eyes were bright and surprisingly Charlie was barely winded at this point. Don was pretty sure that had that been him running that much at that speed, he would be sweating and panting by this time.
Finally, after another ten minutes, Charlie was finished. He removed his ipod, turned it off and started his cool downs.
"How do you do that Buddy? How do you keep up that pace for so long?"
"No big secret Don, I just get on and run. It relaxes me."
"I think it would kill me."
"Okay, all done. How about I blend us some smoothies to take to the roof with us. I have it on good authority that milk shakes are good for me and this is as close as I can get."
"Sure, a smoothie sounds good."
They went back to the apartment. Alan was putting containers in the freezer. The oven was still on and Charlie suspected his dad had just put in another dish.
Charlie blended a strawberry/banana smoothie for all of them. He and Don took theirs and headed for the roof.
The roof was deserted as Charlie was sure it would be. They sat in two chairs side by side.
"Charlie, this has been eating away at me ever since that night that I came to see you at Cal Sci the last time."
Charlie had mentally braced himself for this moment but at this point he was not sure he could do this just yet. Charlie started to say something and was raising from his chair at the same time.
"Please Buddy, let me talk. We have so much to talk about." Charlie, sat back down and leaned back in the chair. He tipped his head back and waited.
"The first place I want to start is with that case. I was unfair to you. It was my case and I was in charge. Every time there was a call about another dead child found, it just ripped more and more at my soul. What kind of a psycho would want to kill so many little innocent kids?"
"This was not the kind of killer that was using logic. This was not an animal that could be found by just anybody. This was a kind of case that needed special attention and a special brain to solve. The rest of us normal brains didn't stand a chance without any clues, but in my heart I knew that your brain could do things the rest of us couldn't. So, I really expected that you could do something that no one else could."
"Don, you have to know I tried."
"I know you did Buddy. I know that you worked hard looking for answers that logically were just not there. There was never a clue left behind, the perp never once slipped up. The subtle pattern that eventually formed would not have been spotted by anyone else but you. But, my main point is that I was wrong to expect you to do the impossible. I tried to rationalize during the case that it was not your fault. But there was that one voice in my head that kept saying 'Charlie can do this'; 'Charlie can find the answer to anything'. And that part of my brain just seemed to take over. I couldn't close that voice out."
"All of your life you were finding answers that I had been struggling for. I could never understand the genius that is you. I tried many times, but in the end, I decided not to try and understand it, just accept it. Charlie knows the answers whether I can understand how or not."
"After that night when you and I fought, I felt the overwhelming guilt that took over my every thought. It's been that way since that night Charlie. For over six weeks, my main focus has been the guilt and my actual betrayal to you as a brother."
There were tears in Don's eyes now and he wiped them away. Charlie had his head tipped back and seemed to be gazing at the stars, completely relaxed. Don moved his chair so that he was facing his brother. "Charlie, I've made the mistake of not allowing you to be human. I'm not proud of my thoughts or actions. I'm not trying to erase my guilty conscious by explaining any of it away."
"I hurt you, I know I did and I'm not just talking about that shiner either." Charlie looked from the stars to Don's face. Charlie straightened in his chair. He looked into Don's eyes when he spoke.
"First I want to say that I forgive you for what happened during the case, emotions were high, I understand that. What happened after the case is the part that hurt the most. All my life I've looked up to you Don, nothing you ever did was wrong, you were the most important person in my life. Your approval was everything to me." Charlie had to look way from Don's eyes. He wiped at his eyes.
Charlie looked at the drink in his hands. "After that case, I had to face some hard realities. You had never been proud of anything I had done; I was never going to be the brother you wanted. It really wasn't all about that case, that was just the breaking point. I'm proud of what I've accomplished in my life. I will not go through the rest of my life waiting for you to see me for who I am and accept me. You will always be my brother and I will always love you, but I have to take the power from you that you have to hurt me like that again."
Don's voice was little more than a whisper, "Charlie."
Charlie's eyes were now filling with tears. "I can't do this now Don."
Charlie got up and walked away.