Author's Note: And, on to Cyborg! I have a question to ask of Cyborg that must (I mean, absolutely must) be answered. On with the show!
(camera focuses in on a, surprisingly, empty cafeteria. After panning for a moment, it zooms into the gym that is adjoined to the cafeteria, where the table has been moved, along with Starfire's cage and the other Titan's Plexiglas box. Starfire's perfect hair looks more than just slightly messed up, and she is looking very dejected. The other Titans are huddling in a group, conversing)
Robin: I thought the crazy one was never going to stop shocking Star. Everytime she said anything at all…
Raven: The crazy one? They're all crazy. We're in a plastic box, Robin.
Beast Boy: They made me be a girl!
Raven: The only way we're going to get out of here is if we get Control Freak's remote away from Queen-morganalefay.
Beast Boy: They made me be a girl!
Robin: Well, how do you suggest we do that? She used the power button to turn your powers off, Raven, and Beast Boy can only change into a chicken. And that StarStar16 girl took away my weapons…and my cape.
Beast Boy: And they made me be a GIRL!
Raven: We heard you the first time.
Beast Boy: You just don't understand.
Raven: Well, someone's PMSing.
(The three interviewers walk in, with Queen smirking wide. The other two are looking slightly aggravated)
TTJ: Queen, you simply cannot ask him that question.
Queen: Why not? Star got to ask her stupid question about that awful picture.
Star: Well, it was important, and the world needed to know!
(Theme music begins to play. Star glares heatedly at the backstage crew)
Star: Not NOW, you idiots! I was only stating the fact. (rolls eyes) Seriously, where did we pick up these losers?
Queen: Behind the Burger King parking lot, next to the dumpster.
TTJ: When I suggested we get bums to save budget money I wasn't speaking literally.
Queen: Too late for that now. (takes her seat and looks over to the EMCEE) Are we ready?
EMCEE: As much as we'll ever be. Camera's are testing currently and satellite and cable feed is interrupted, along with the scrambler.
Queen: Excellent. Hey, guys, has the thought ever crossed your mind, maybe we should wear hockey masks when we do this? To mask our identity?
TTJ: (pouts) But I finally got my hair to do what I wanted it to do this morning!
Star: (waves hand) Never mind that. We need to get on with the interview. Besides, I want to interview a villain tomorrow.
Queen: Which one?
TTJ: Can we interview Terra?
Queen: She's not a villain….besides, are we sure our crew and set could handle a villain?
Star: Screw it. Who cares if this stuff get's destroyed? It's not ours…
EMCEE: And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the last of the main heroes to be welcomed into The World Needs to Know: Teen Titans Edition! I would like to introduce, that medical marvel, the robotic man, Cyborg!
Queen: You sound as if you are inviting him to wrestle.
(Cyborg walks in and looks around, looking extremely peeved)
Cyborg: Beast Boy, did you know you stacked so much junk in the hall closet that…what the—where the heck am I? (raises an eye at Robin, Beast Boy, and Raven) And why are ya'll in a box? (looks at Starfire) Umm…Star…didn't Robin tell you not to go into cages?
Starfire: I was informed it would be extremely rude to—(yelps when Queen shocks her with the collar).
TTJ: Hey, Cy! Whazzup, buddy!
Queen: Won't you have a seat? We just want to interview you.
Robin: Cy, get us out of here, they're crazy!
(Queen places him in his seat using the remote)
Queen: I truly do love technology.
Star: Are your screws loose?
Cy: What?
Star: Do you need someone to tighten your screws?
Cy: Um…
TTJ: Star! That's entirely uncalled for. (leans forward) So, since your metal parts are white, but your skin is black, would that make you Caucasian or African American?
Queen: JUNKIE!
TTJ: What? It's a perfectly viable question.
Cy: Um, this is just a guess, but are ya'll escaped from Arkham?
Star: Muhahahahaha.
Queen: Nope. Milledgeville.
Cy: Ooookay.
Queen: I was wondering, Cy. Can I call you Cy?
Cy: No.
Queen: Okay, Cy. Now, are you too sexy for your shirt?
Star and TTJ: We told you not to ask him!
Cy: What?
Queen: Are you too sexy for your shirt? Because you're not wearing one.
Cy: random. Besides, why would I wear a shirt? Most of me is metal, it would be pointless to wear—
Queen: Come to think of it, you're not wearing pants either.
TTJ: (shakes head) Here we go.
Queen: So wears your….you know. Was it destroyed too, or is it like a cord now, or—
Cy: Now, really! That's just—
Star: But, wouldn't that make him a she?
TTJ: No, it would make him a he/she/it.
Queen: Or just an it, because I don't think he has either organs. Hmm…probably why he never has a girlfriend.
Cy: That's not it! I'm just too busy…
Queen: Tell the truth…Jinx dumped you because your electrical parts didn't turn her on.
TTJ: (starts giggling) No, Jinx just left him because Bumblebee had a better spark with him.
Star: (crosses arms) I don't see how any of this is funny. I want to interview Robin some more.
TTJ: I gotta car, I gotta car, yeah!
Star: Oookay, that was random.
Queen: Not really. Cy, have you ever battled an army of invisible reversed vampire penguins?
Cy: No…why?
Queen: Hm…would you like to? (points the remote and Cy's chair is knocked backwards by some force. He yelps and begins to run)
Cy: Get 'em away, get 'em away! Make them stop biting!
(Loud sirens go off)
Queen: Oh, he said the magic word.
Star: Great. (rolls eyes)
(Chickens are dumped all over Cyborg from the sky, and chase him into the Plexiglas box. The EMCEE gets in front of the camera again, wiping sweat off his brow)
EMCEE: Until tomorrow, America, this is The World Needs to Know! And I would like to inform any police who happen to be watching that I am not in cahoots with these scoundrels.
TTJ: Hehe, he said cahoots!
Queen: Newfangled!
Star: Tickled pink!
TTJ: Our EMCEE is old, hehehe. (All three girls dissolve in laughter. Camera fades out, after a commercial)
Commercial: This is Rob. Rob is doing well. Very well indeed. That's because Rob has decided he wants more power in his life. And what did he get? Why, a little more oil in his gears. A higher upgrade. And a more sleek CPU in lower places…