Thin Line Between Love and Hate

Lily woke up the next morning with her head spinning and a sick feeling in her stomach. The celebration about the end of finals last night had not been kind on her brain cells. She made a quick mental note to stay away from fire whiskey in the future. Her bones ached and her head was pounding and throbbing. She'd thank her stars if she could make it out the door. She stumbled out of bed and with her eyes still closed; she reached into her trunk to pull out something that hopefully resembles an outfit.

As she walked out into the common room, the sun, yet again, was glaring painfully into her eyes. With that and the headache, she wished that she hadn't woken up at all. Through her barely open eyes, she spotted James and Madison curled up comfortably together on the couch. "God," she thought, "just what I need right now."

"Liiiiily, dah-ling," Madison purred happily.

Lily looked to and fro James. What on earth was Madison on?

"Maddie," she ventured carefully, "Are you all right?"

"I'm absooolutely spiffffy, dah-ling," Madison answered, contently blowing air into James's ears – at which he was wincing.

"Potter, what is wrong with her?" demanded Lily.

"Well," James began slowly, measuring his words as carefully as he could, "She's a bit drunk."

"A bit?" Lily managed to stammer out. It was almost noon. Noon just isn't an acceptable hour to be drunk. Sure, there were celebrations the night before but to be actually drunk until noon the next day was just insane.

James nodded, looking mildly concerned.

"A bit?" she repeated lamely. She laughed softly and hid her face behind her hands before slowly looking up again. "James," she began, "you are the most horrible…person…that I have ever had the misfortune to encounter."

James stammered for words. "What?" he said blankly.

"How could you dare to get her drunk like this?" Lily looked at her friend, her face full of concern and anger. "She is piss drunk, and you are just standing idly by? How on earth did she get that drunk? Especially at this time of day! You are taking advantage of her! You're horrible – despicable."

James stared at her for moment before beginning angrily, "First of all, I told her not to drink. She chose this herself. Secondly, I'm trying to help her, not take advantage."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Sure. Just go away." She went to her friend who had been watching the exchange with a somber, pouty face. She frowned when Lily came close to her and wiggled out of Lily's reach when Lily came closer to try to get her back up to the dormitory.

Madison giggled. "James, dah-ling, make Lily go away."

James, who had had been watching Lily's futile efforts, nodded solemnly and turned to Lily. "You heard her. She wants me to stay," he said as gently as he could.

"Fine," Lily retorted. She grabbed her messenger bag that had been resting on a nearby table and walked, somewhat huffily, out of the common room. If Madison chose to be stupid, there was nothing she could do. Besides, she was not going to let an event like this ruin the moment for her – finals are over! She still had a creeping, annoying feeling that she should be studying for something. Now, on top of that, she had to worry about Madison and her disastrous involvement with James Potter. This was not what she pictured for the week after the OWLs.

Nonetheless, she would have to try her best to enjoy herself. She joined the other Gryffindors in the Great Hall for a late breakfast. She caught sight of Blair's pale blonde hair and decided to join her. Blair smiled warmly at her as she sat down.

"Had quite a night, Lils?"

Lily laughed. "You could say that. I was a bit wasted actually, last night that is." She paused before she went on. She did not know if Blair was aware of Madison's condition and Blair tended to take things like these a bit hardly. "Actually, I guess I wasn't the only one partying a bit."

Blair giggled. "I know. The whole school is a bit hung over. I swear I saw McGonagall stumbling down with a bottle last night and then, this morning, she had an ice pack on her head."

Lily smiled weakly, trying to imagine their very proper and serious teacher in a situation like that. "Huh. Well that's quite something, isn't it? Um, have you seen Madison this morning?"

Blair grinned. "No, I haven't. I think she pulled an all-nighter with James – oh I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have mentioned that – I mean…" She trailed off, looking a little worried now.

"Blair, you can talk about Potter in front of me. I mean, I do hate him but still."

Blair looked uncomfortable. "Really? You don't like Potter? Madison said-"

"Madison doesn't know," Lily cut in, "I honestly truly do not like James Potter in any way. In fact, I kind of hate him." She repeated the last part as though she was divulging a new secret – not a clear fact...that she stated not two seconds earlier.

Blair nodded. "Okay. But, you know, it's a fine line between love and hate."

Lily almost snorted in her cereal. "I don't think so. We've got to keep you away from those teen advice columns. Don't worry, I clearly hate him. No gray area here."

"If you say so." Blair shrugged.

Lily nodded fervently. "Back to what I was saying, Madison was quite wasted this morning."

"Lily," Blair said soothingly, "Everyone was wasted this morning."

"No," Lily shook her head, "She was actually drunk, not just hungover. I mean, she's actually drunk now. It's like, noon," and she added pointedly, "And James is with her."

Blair frowned, looking a little worried now. "Well, I suppose that's okay. I mean, they're old enough to make decisions for themselves. If Madison wants to drink and be with her boyfriend, it's alright with me."

Lily shrugged. "Well, I thought that you should know. I was kind of worried there for a moment. But, if you're not worried, then I'm not worried. She's in good hands." Lily laughed inwardly at the last comment.

Blair nodded. "I think so. James has matured so much since they've starting seeing each other. He's not as erratic, I think. He's calmed down so much and he actually goes to most of his classes. Going out with Madison has been so good for him. I bet they're meant to be!" Blair ended somewhat giddily.

Lily felt heat rising to her cheeks. That was ridiculous – James and Madison could not be "meant to be." It was simply impossible. Madison was just another girl in James's path of destruction – wasn't she? Lily had been pretty sure until now that she was the only one James would love forever and that she could torture him with the fact that they would never be. Could it be that James was actually over her?

Lily felt cold and she didn't know why. She excused herself from the table and walked out into the grounds, not knowing what she was looking for.

James Potter sighed as he watched his girlfriend amuse herself with dancing flames in the fireplace. He didn't know how much longer he could keep up this ruse. If it didn't work, he would just have to kill Sirius. Or, at least yell at him for a bit. Sirius always has these brilliant ideas. Moony had warned him against it though. James cursed inwardly. He should've listened to Moony, like a sane person. This had become all too complicated. She would hate him by the end of this.

As he was losing himself in his thoughts, Blair burst in through the portrait door. She smiled at him and then looked over to her sister, her smile fading slowly.

"Oh my. She is quite drunk, isn't she?" she said, biting her lip and wringing her hands.

"She is," James answered shortly, getting up from the couch and heading towards the boys' dormitory. "Take care of her, will you? I have to get some sleep. I was up all night."

Blair nodded but frowned slightly at the last comment. Of course, James did not see it since he was already past the door of the boys' dormitory.

The light inside was dim since the curtains were still closed. There was soft snoring from Sirius's bed. James walked over and nudged his friend's shoulder.

"Wake up."

"Five…more…" mumbled Sirius, barely coherent.

James nudged harder and said sharply, "Wake up."

Sirius blinked weakly. "Prongs. Why?" he almost whined.

"Because your plan is not going to work," James said, through his teeth.

Sirius sat up quickly. "What do ya mean?"

"Exactly what I said. She's going to hate me."

Sirius frowned. "Not if I can help it."

Lily sighed. She was walking along the banks of the lake. It was deserted now, since most people were inside the Great Hall, enjoying breakfast or lunch. Lily felt heavy inside. This year was not going according to plan. She wasn't supposed to being fighting with her best friend and her best friend wasn't supposed to be going out with James Potter, and more importantly, Lily wasn't supposed to care that she was going out with James Potter. She walked around the lake, her mind swimming with blurry thoughts she couldn't hold on to.