Josh didn't hear the pounding at first. He had somehow incorporated it into this awful nightmare, and the pounding were the sounds of explosions all around him. He jerked awake with a start when he realized that someone was desperately trying to get his attention. Stumbling to the door in a t-shirt and sweat pants, he looked through the peep hole and was happy to see it was only Sam.

"I'm here," he called sleepily through the door as he fumbled with the locks. He heard Sam breathing heavily on the other side, and when he finally got the door open, he was shocked to see how upset and scared he looked. He walked past Josh into the apartment, waited until he shut the door, and then whirled around to look at him with a mixture of relief, sympathy, and annoyance.

"I've been calling you all day. No answer. I knock on the door for five straight minutes. No answer. It's time for you to stop making me panic, ok?"

Josh glanced down sheepishly but with a slight smile. It was nice to know someone cared even if he had to find out like this.

"Want anything to drink?" he asked, covering up a yawn as he walked into the kitchen. Sam followed him and perched on the counter.

"Sure. Are you going to make coffee?"

Josh picked a used coffee filter out of the top of the coffee maker and made a face. Tossing it into the garbage, he muttered, "I really hope that wasn't the last one," and then sighed with relief when he realized he still had one more. While he set about the business of making the coffee, Sam watched him carefully and started to relax. It seemed as though the hours of sleep must have helped at least a little.

They sat in companionable silence while Josh finished the preparations and then moved into the living room to wait for the coffee to be ready.

"So you slept the day away, huh?" Sam asked. He was so happy that Josh was finally looking slightly less haunted that he'd forgotten about where he knew Josh had been that morning.

"Well, I went to sleep when I got back from meeting the Mosses at their hotel." He glanced down at his feet, and Sam wanted to kick himself for even mentioning anything. Before he could apologize, though, Josh jumped up to check on the coffee.

When he got back, he sat down on the couch, and it was easy to see the gloom had returned. He didn't even look at Sam for a few minutes, and then he muttered, "Uh… I'm going to need your help with something."

"Anything," Sam responded quickly. "What is it?"

Josh finally looked up, and Sam almost wished he hadn't because the pain had returned to his eyes.

"Donna's parents asked me to give a eulogy." It was all he said, but what he was asking was clear.

"I'll help you write it right now if you want," he said gently. Josh nodded.

"Let me just go get the coffee."

Sam sighed and sank back into the couch. This was going to be a long afternoon. He smiled when Josh came back in, though, and moved over so they could sit side by side. Josh reached over the side of the couch and grabbed his laptop.

"I don't even know where to start," he muttered as he waited for it to boot.

He stared at the blank screen to avoid looking at Sam, but he looked up when he felt Sam staring at him.

"First of all," Sam said calmly, "you need to figure out if you want everyone else to know how much you loved her."

Josh's hands slipped from the keyboard, and he turned to look at Sam through tear-filled eyes.

"It was that obvious?" he choked, and when Sam nodded sadly, Josh shoved the computer onto the couch between them and buried his face in his hands. He knew Sam was watching him, but he didn't even care anymore. He was past the point of caring. And when Sam moved the laptop to the coffee table and put his arm around him, he kind of leaned into him again. When he finally calmed down, he sat up and picked up the laptop again, pretending nothing had happened, pretending that he hadn't just essentially confirmed what everyone had thought about his feelings for Donna for the last seven or so years.

"So," he said, his voice tight, "let's write this thing."

Swiping quickly at his own eyes and making a tremendous effort to steady his voice, Sam nodded and said, "Let's do it."