Title - Fia'in Summer

Summary -Two lives being led by one person. Buffy Summers is the newly famous punk singer Fia'in Slayer, what happens when her friends find out.

Disclaimer - Not mine! All characters belong to Mutant Enemy and Joss Whedon

Rating - Pg-13, I suppose.

Chapter 13

As we entered the Bronze the smell of sweat and smoke surrounded us. Angel was lightly gripping my hand as we walked towards an empty table. He had barely spoken two words to me since he assured me that he was indeed, not having second thoughts. It was actually really unnerving for him to be so quiet. After all I expected a little small talk it was a date after all.

Sitting in the chair that Angel pulled out, I waited until Angel was sitting to speak. "Are you alright Angel? "

"Of course, why wouldn't I be," he questioned wonderingly.

"It's just you haven't said two words from the car." I looked down at her hands.

When I looked back up Angel was once again, in his own little world. Getting exasperated with his quietness I snarled at him, "If you didn't want to be hear tonight than why did you ask me out?"

Looking stunned he floundered for a moment looking for the right thing to say. "I…uh…I do want to be here. It's just…I mean to say I found some things out that have brought up a few questions."

"What did you find out that was so important," now curious, I inquired.

For some reason anger seemed to begin to rise in him. His eyes were now burning with suppressed rage. Now I was beyond curious, what could I have said that would make him so angry? It was baffling and I was desperate to know where this new found anger, sprang from. His emotions are usually so hard to read so it surprised me that he was so open now.

"Nothing," he mumbled in a tone that was frightfully tense.

However this did not deter me, in fact it pushed my forward in my quest to find out what was wrong with him, "Something is wrong. You've been tense and quiet all night, and I want to know what is up with you."

I knew he snapped when his head shot out and the fire in his eyes lashed out, "How about we not talk about me. In fact let's talk about you. How does that sound Buffy, or should I call you Fia'in Slayer."

I gasped when he finished. How did he find out? No one besides a few select people knows of my real identity. So how the hell did he find out? I felt like I wanted to strangle someone. For years I had been able to keep my two lives separate and now someone had to blabber it out. Great, my life had just got all the more complicated.

"I…uh…I don't…uh…know what you're…uh…talking about." I tried to stammer out the lie.

"There's no since in lying any more. I over heard Giles talking on the phone."

Knowing the gig was up but not wanting to admit defeat I attacked him verbally, "You had no right in eavesdropping on a private conversation, especially in someone else's home."

I could tell his anger was simmering under his controlled mask, "Buffy, I was not eavesdropping. At least not at first." He mumbled the last part before raising his voice again. "You had left you favorite coat in the car and I wanted to give it to you. I knocked but no one answered so I opened the door and went to set it down, when I heard Giles talking about Fia'in Slayer. I admit it was quite the shock to find out that one of the people that I have known for the past four years is actually someone totally different."

"It's not like that Angel. You have to understand…" I tried to explain but he cut me off.

"I don't have to understand anything. You lied to me and everyone else for the past four years. I thought we were friends. This simply shows just how easily we're all fooled."

"Angel." I pleaded. "It wasn't like that. I…"

Again I wasn't able to finish my sentence because of an interruption. However it wasn't Angel again, turning around I was faced with the betrayed face of two of my best friends.

"Willow."

"Oh god, how could you Buffy."

"You have to realize," I tried explaining to her but she didn't seem to care since she continued with her accusations.

"You've lied to me…us for the past four years." She stressed as if I didn't know. "I thought I…we were your friends."

"You guys are my friends, but you have to understand that I was young when I first came here."

"You age doesn't give you a reason to continue to lie to us after we all became friends." Angel said angrily, though I could hear the underlying hurt. "Explain to me why you had to lie for so long."

Looking across at Willow who had taken a seat next to Angel I tried to convey to her my apologizies for lying so long. It didn't seem like she wanted them for she dropped her head and shook it slightly in declination of my apologizies. Knowing that no understanding was going to come from Willow at this point I returned my attention to Angel.

The face that confronted me when I looked back at Angel was one filled with betrayal, hurt and anger. Knowing that by the end of the night all my friends would know my secret, I decided to 'kill two birds with one stone'. I would get all my friends together and than explain about my other life. At least than I would have it done and over with. No more hiding and no one will fill left out.

Sighing in frustration I answered Angel, "Tell you what, you get everyone together and meet me here in an hour. I'll explain everything than."

"Why not now?"

"Cause Giles will be worried if I don't call to tell him I'll be late. And I don't need to be grounded right now."

"Fine. Back here in one hour." I could see that he was only reluctantly agreeing.

I watched as both Angel and Willow left with slight anxiety. In an hour my lies were about to be revealed and I didn't know if I wanted them to be or not. It was hard to believe that it was only a few weeks ago that I was trying to figure out how to tell them and now that they were finally going to find out I didn't want them to. I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice the time pass and my friends enter. It wasn't until a hand landed on my shoulder that I pulled myself out of my thoughts. Seeing all my friends now standing behind me, I motion them to follow me and I lead them up to the catwalk above the dance floor of the Bronze.

"Why doesn't everyone take a seat," I suggest when I notice that everyone is still standing.

Just as everyone finished taking his or her seat Anya spoke, "Buffy why are we here? It better be good you woke Xander and I from a peaceful afterglow."

"Well…" I tried to stall my way out of the confrontation but one look from Angel and I knew that everything was coming out tonight. "I have something to tell everyone and you guys are probably going to be up set with me."

I could see confusion and curiosity enter all their eyes, before I heard Oz speak. "So, what is it?"

"I…umm…I…I happen to work…have a career. I happen to have job the I get paid for."

"That's what you brought us all here for?" Cordelia asked in annoyance at the same time Doyle said, "We were not going to like this because?"

Knowing there was no going back and no getting out of the confession I took a deep breathe and started my long and tedious explanation.

"Three years ago I moved here for reasons unknown to you guys."

"Your mother wanted to move away form LA." Cordelia said in a voice that clearly said she thought that I was losing my mind.

"I know, but that wasn't the full reason and if you want to know than be quiet." I shot at her when I saw that she was going to speak again. "Three years ago I was the reason that we left LA. I needed to get out of the city, away from the media frenzy."

"Media frenzy?" Spike asked.

I could see that he was about to ask more and I just wanted to get my explaination finished so I could go home and cry myself to sleep. After all that was what was going to happen when I finally tell everyone that I have been lying to them for the past three years.

"Yes media frenzy. Now can..." I was cut off from finishing by Anya this time.

"What media..."

Fully frustrated I slammed my chair backwards, interrupting what Anya was going to say, and stared down my friends. I could understand how they may be feeling frustrated right now, but they weren't even letting me finish answering the first questions before asking more. Trying one last time to explain it to them I pushed on blocking all their attempts to interrupt me.

"I was thirteen when I started my career and I didn't understand that my life would change so drastically when I was discovered. It was just a hobby of mine that I enjoyed and that my mother supported me one hundred and ten percent in.

See when I lived in LA I had only two really good friends that i could count on. Winfred Burkle and Charles Gunn. Not two people you would image that I would hang out with, but they are my best friends other than you all. Anyways we all knew each other for the longest time. I knew Gunn since I was a baby and Fred since I was about four. We were all next door neighbors.

Well when we got older we all discovered that we were artistically talented. Fred with the drums, Gunn with a guitar, and I with my voice. So like any other young group who found themselves with an overabundance of talent we formed another garage band. We didn't have any dreams of becoming big it was just a hobby to pass the time.

By the age of thirteen we had been practicising for three years and had in the last year played ata couple of school functions. So when a talent show came to our school Fred suggested that we should sign up for it. Me and Gunn thought it would be a fun expercience and so we naturally agreed. What we didn't know is that one of the kid's parent in the show was a scout for up and coming talent."

I halted my explaination for a second to take in the looks on my friends faces. I could see that Angel, Willow, Oz and surprisingly Doyle knew where I was going. Cordelia could tell that she as missing something but she was to engrossed in the my story to interrupt. Xander had no clue where I was going, and Anya was bored. I couldn't read Faith and Spike looked as if he didn't fully want to be here but he was intrigued also. Not wanting to give them time to ask anything I continued.

"That night at the talent show Gunn, Fred and I had the most fun we had ever had. What we didn't know was that night we were also discovered. It was only a week later that all our mother's were sitting together discussing the scout's, Mr. Thayer's, proposition.

Everything just took off from there. We started daily practices, we all had something to work on. I, my voice, and the others with their instruments. It was only a year later that we were in the top charts and I had a knew name for the world to call me by. We became famous so fast that we didn't have a chance to get used to it. The fans that approached us on the street were overwhelming number. Our classmates treated us like royalty practically, we went from the loners of the school to the most popular kids. It was freaky.

We were all only thirteen and our lifes had just drastically changed. Gunn and Fred were able to handle it better. I don't know why, maybe because I was mostly in the spotlight that first year or maybe they just had a strong character. What ever it was I didn't have and so I had to move. It was a year after we were first discovered that I decided that the media was to much to handle. So my mother and me moved to Sunnydale.

From then on I hid the fact of who I was. Not only from the media but from everyone around me that was not somehow connected to my music career. I wanted a life that wasn't weighed down from the stress of being famous, and that's what I got. However to achieve that i had to lie to you all."

Pausing I took a deep breath hoping to calm my wired nerves. I knew they would be mad but I hope that one of them was going to understand. Angel, is who I really wished would be understanding but I won't hold my breathe, and if I can't have Angel then I hope Faith or Spike understands.

"What I haven't told you about myself these past three years is that, I'm also Fia'an Slayer."

There I told them. Finally it was off my chest, I was no longer burdened with my secret.

Looking around at their faces I could see the emotions played out on their faces. The common one was disbelieve, and then betrayal. What amazed me was that anger was only in three faces, Angel, Willow and Spike. Xander seemed astonished while Anya openly stared at me in awe. Cordelia had a incredlous look while Doyle seemed, surprisingly, smug. Now, Faithand Oz were the only ones I couldn't read openly, the only emotion I seemed to get off her was patience.

It was to overwhelming for me. I expected everyone to be throwig accusing and betraqyed glances my way, but when it was only three out of nine friends who actually were I got confused. I couldn't stand it Angel'saccussing stare and betrayed glances. So I did the only logical thing I could do in that moment. I ran. I careened down the stairs and through the Bronze's front entrance. All without looking back. How could I when it it was clearly evident that there was no forgiveness from the one person I wanted.

It wasn't until I was safely in my bedroom that I let myself cry. I cried for the friendship, the possibilty of romance and the sense of security that was lost tonight. I knew that he was going to have problems, however I did not think that there was going to be no chance at forgiveness in his eyes. And that is what I saw, or not saw, not a ounce of forgiveness. My worries didn't even really encompass my other friends and I knew why. I was going to finally have my chance with him and it had to end before it ever started.