"We should try and sleep."

"Okay."

"…Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah…I just…don't really want to waste the time sleeping."

"I know how you feel, but we've got a job to do tomorrow."

"I know…but I want to give you something." Cloud said.

"What is that?"

"A present! I made it for you."

He hopped out of bed and rummaged through his duffle bag, retrieving the tiny little book that I had found earlier that day. He handed to me and smiled.

"They say you don't have a birthday."

"No, I don't."

"Well, this is for your birthday."

Frankly, I was touched. I once again flipped through the pages of scribbled handwriting, then held my arms out to him. He crawled in bed once again and pushed himself against me, clearly content.

Wrapping my arms around him, I smiled for the second time that day.

"You told me to keep writing." he said.

"…Thank you. …So today is my birthday?"

"March twenty-third. Everyone should have a birthday."

For a long time, we were silent. Then I sighed and leaned my head against his, finally letting out the heavy burden that was on my heart.

"I'm not what everyone thinks I am, Cloud. I'm not a hero. I've killed people…who were just fighting for their choice. What kind of a hero is that?"

"You're a hero because you know that it was wrong."

"But then everyone is a hero."

"Exactly. That's what dad used to tell me."

"…If I was a real hero, wouldn't I leave the company ?"

"No." Cloud said, sitting up in the bed. "No you wouldn't, because its all you know. They've been good to you. There are just a few bad things that they do, too. Maybe by staying with the Shinra, we can stop those bad things from happening."

I smiled at him and kissed his forehead. "What a wonderful idealist you are."

After that I turned off the lights and put the covers over both of us. There are two beds, but we'll only need one, I think. We'll take a good long shower in the morning.

Three a.m. I see the light turn on in the bathroom. I feel the empty space in the bed next to me. I hear tiny gasping noises coming from beyond the door. I decide to investigate.

And there I see Cloud, beautiful, naked, stroking himself as fast as he can, panting in between gasps,

"Oh Sephiroth, Sephi-…Sephiroth…"

He's watching himself in the mirror in front of him, twisting his nipple, biting his fingers, stroking his sac, fingering himself as deep as he can to hit that utopia that we discovered together.

I make sure to stand out of the reflection of the mirror so I can watch him. Gorgeous.

Finally he sees me and his face flushes, but he only slows his pace, he doesn't stop.

"By all means, continue." I whisper. I feel myself hard at the prospect.

I sit on the edge of the tub so I can get the front view of him. It should be a sin to watch something so beautiful.

I can't stand it much longer. I walk behind him and thrust my fingers into him. He gasps and I take over his handwork, whispering slyly into his year, "What a wonderful idealist you are."

10 o'clock am and we're just getting started. I've sent Zack out into the village to rent us an extra truck to haul back any broken equipment we find and also a guide that can lead us up the mountain path. I don't like to get the day going so late, but it was very, very hard to get out of bed. After all, I had some very, very good reasons for staying there.

I check Cloud's blood level at Breakfast, and the machine confirms that its safe for him to be exposed to materia. I heal his hands and only two very faint scars remain-- they will fade in a week or two.

Zack comes back with the extra truck at 10 fifteen and says the guide will meet us past the Shinra Mansion. That's fine with me-- Zack and the guide can ride in the other truck and Moray can drive us. It will at least give us a few more moments together before the real work begins.

"Who's the guide?" I asked Zack, rubbing my temples from the enormous headache I had from lack of sleep.

"Some chick, Tifa Lockheart. She's young, but they say she's the best guide if you wanna go up the mountains. Pretty hot, too. You don't mind if I hit on her, do ya, boss?"

"Not in the slightest."

"I'll just ride in the other truck with her then. See ya, boss. Later buttercup!"

He patted Cloud on the back and jumped in the truck. Cloud and I, who were standing next to each other, turned towards one another and smiled.

I of course had enough respect for Cloud not to engage him in a moving truck where he often found himself motion sick. But instead of letting him sit on his own with his head between his legs, he sat next to me, his hand in mine, and his head against my shoulder. I kissed his forehead and felt a peace I had only felt the night before, and was quickly getting used to.

"Who's our guide?" he whispered to me, his eyes closed.

"A young lady."

"Wonder if I know her?"

"Lets not worry about it right now."

"Yes, Sephiroth."

"Cloud." I said to him, locking his fingers in between mine and swallowing myself.

"Yes, Sephiroth?"

"…I love you too."

That was five, nearly six years ago, that that happened. And now here I am, dead to the world, awaiting Cloud to return the black materia to me. It will be the last present he will ever give to me, and it will be against his will. After all, he is still the idealist, and I am still driven solely by instinct.

But for what it's worth, I still love him.