Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

AN: Okay this is probably the chap wich fits the least to the ep it is supposed to fit to, but I was talked into bringing up the 'theme' by several people so I just went for it in this chap. I gave my best to not let it get too OOC, but if you don't even read slight OOC fics, then skip this chap.

many many thanks to Rhee for beta reading! Thank you so much.

chapter 27

"How long?"

"Three more minutes." She told him after glancing at her watch. She could feel her heart beating up to her throat. The last two minutes had felt like hours.

He nodded softly. "So what are we going to do when the test is positive?" He asked after a moment, trying to meet her gaze.

She shrugged. "Don't know… but don't worry, I won't force you to marry me." She winked, trying to lighten up their mood.

nine hours earlier:

She felt like death warmed up; this could not be true. This was not allowed to be true! She still prayed that she had simply made a mistake in her calculations, but if she was honest with herself she knew that she had not miscalculated anything.

In fact she had not even noticed that she was late until she had been more or less coincidentally flicking through the pages of her planner. First, she had tried to tell herself that it might be due to stress, but why did she feel sick whenever she smelled coffee? Or was that just a subconscious overreaction?

She'd be in the fifth week, approximately. That would be the office sex. Which was also the only time that they had not used contraceptives. Great. She cursed herself for her own stupidity.

So what was she supposed to do now? She had to talk with Grissom; how would he react? And when should she talk with him? When she wanted to stick to their rules then she had to wait until shift was over, but their shift had just started! She couldn't wait that long. And she had to take a pregnancy test, maybe it was better to do that before she talked to Grissom. Maybe she was just overreacting, maybe it was nothing.

But where was she supposed to get a test from? She couldn't leave the lab now.

Then she saw Grissom walking through the hallway. She swallowed hard; he was alone, probably this was the only time that she would be able to talk with him alone tonight.

She left the layout room and followed him to his office. He stopped when he heard her behind him. He turned around and gave her a soft smile. "Hey, you okay?" He leaned back against the doorframe and tilted his head to the side.

"We need to talk." She told him, feeling how her hands began to shake.

He arched an eyebrow and threw an asking look at her. "What's wrong?" He sounded concern now.

She was just about to tell him that they'd better enter his office because she needed to talk with him in privacy, when the camera team joined them. "Dr. Grissom, are you talking bout the case at the moment?"

Sara knew that Grissom couldn't answer with a 'No' to that question. She sighed and gave the cameraman a soft smile, then excused herself. She would have to try it again later.

In the meantime she told herself that she needed to calm down and had to focus on work. She didn't know how she was supposed to do so but she still had to try.

After an hour she had managed to distract herself and was examining a piece of evidence when she suddenly felt a hand on her back. She winced, but then realized that it was Grissom's hand, which was less scary than the possibility of it being Hodges's hand. But still, they were in the layout room, Grissom couldn't simply touch her, here where everyone could see them. She turned around to face him and gave him a soft smile. "Hey."

"Hey." He replied and winked at her. "Everything okay?"

"Well, I was just working on this…" She started but he didn't let her finish.

"I mean about what you wanted to talk with me earlier."

She swallowed hard when the supplanted thoughts returned to her mind. "I… I… I don't know if we should talk about this here." She stammered, feeling how her hands began to shake again.

He gave her a concerned look and was about to reach out for her upper arm, she turned around again to signalize him that she did not want to be touched right now, and more important, not here.

He sighed and leaned back against the table. "Then let's go to my office." He offered.

She shook her head. "Later."

"Sara, I'm worried." He confessed.

She did not want him to be worried. But she did not even know for sure yet if her suspicion was true or if she was just overreacting. On the other hand, she really needed to talk about it, maybe he would manage to calm her down. "Okay, but in your office."

He nodded softly. "Okay." His hand returned to the small of her back and he softly caressed her with his thumb.

She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, then she let him lead her out of the room. He let go of her back when they entered the hallway, slowly walking next to her.

Suddenly the camera team crossed their way. Sara didn't know whether to feel relieved or annoyed when they were stopped by them. The camera man tried to implicate Grissom into a conversation and Sara could see how annoyed Grissom was. She was not in the mood to talk with any of the members of the camera team, they weren't the kind of people that she liked to hang out with; she wasn't a fan of reporters.

"We'll talk later." She told Grissom softly and left, well knowing that he cursed her for leaving him alone with the reporters. She didn't like doing this to him, but at the moment she just couldn't stand so many people around her.

Returning to her work in the layout room it was difficult to find the strength to focus on the evidence again. She needed to talk with Grissom. She had to talk about it with someone, and since only Grissom was allowed to know about this she could only talk with him.

She let evidence be evidence and made her way back to his office. He had managed to get rid of the camera team and was about to take seat on his chair when she entered his office. Giving him an insecure smile she closed the door behind herself. Then she took a deep breath and headed for the free chair in front of his table. She sat down and folded her shaking hands in her lap.

"What's wrong Honey?" He asked concerned.

She wasn't able to look at him, she was too scared to see all his facial expressions slipping off his face when he got to know about her suspicions. She stared down at her hands and bit down on her bottom lip, then brushed a strand of hair out of her face and back behind her ear. "I… I… think I'm…" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I don't know for sure yet but I think that I am pregnant."

He did not answer and she did not look at him, even though the need to do so grew up in her faster and faster. She needed to know what he was thinking about this. But would she be able to stand his shocked expression?

After a while, that felt like hours to her, he broke the silence. "You think you are pregnant?" He asked softly, but calmly.

She nodded, her eyes still closed, her lips pressed together.

"Did you take a pregnancy test?"

She shook her head. "No, I… I didn't have the time to buy one yet."

She heard how he stood up and walked over to her, then he took a seat on the other chair next to her. He reached out for her upper arm and caressed her softly. "Honey, look at me." He whispered and she opened her eyes.

Her chest tightened, she couldn't read from his expression. It was weird, as if he himself wouldn't know what to feel. He just looked at her for a long time, but then he had figured out what to say. "Listen Honey, don't worry. We don't know it for sure, we should really not start worrying until after."

She nodded softly, not really feeling relieved but at least he knew it now, she did not have to be afraid of his reaction anymore. "Okay."

Before either of them could make the attempt to continue the conversation Sofia knocked on the door and entered without waiting for any invitations. "Sorry to interrupt you, but they're searching for you Gil."

"Who?" Grissom turned to her for a second but then turned back to Sara.

"The camera team." Sofia replied.

Grissom sighed and threw an apologetic look at Sara. She gave him a soft smile and nodded. "We'll talk later." She told him softly and left her seat.

"Okay." He stood up and followed Sofia out to meet the camera team.

Two more hours to go until shift was over, she didn't know if she could make it any longer. The closer to the end the shift came, the more nervous and worried she became. She couldn't help it.

She was talking with the camera team when Grissom joined their conversation. They were discussing the case for a while until he had to leave because he had a brief meeting with Ecklie and the Sheriff.

He already was about to leave when he turned to Sara again. "I've got something in the drawer of my desk for you."

She raised an eyebrow, at first not really knowing what he meant and also wondering if he was aware of the possibility that the camera team might suspect something that they were not supposed to suspect. "Something for… for that other case I am working on?"

He understood and nodded. "Yes, yeah, that other case."

She gave him a soft smile. "Thank you." Where had he managed to get a pregnancy test from?

As soon as he had left she also excused herself. She hurried to his office and entered it as soon as she had made sure that no-one saw her.

She opened the first drawer of his desk, papers, letters, envelopes, pencils, a framed picture of her. Of me? She was speechless for a moment. Wow, he had a picture of her in his office; the thought made her smile. For a moment it let her forget why she had been rummaging the drawer.

But then she remembered. She closed the first drawer again and opened the next one. There she found it. She took a deep breath and put it into the pocket of her jacket.

On her way to the bathroom she met Grissom in the hallway. "And?" He asked slightly nervous.

"I was just about to take the test." She told him softly.

He nodded. "Okay." He softly brushed the back of his fingers over her upper arm. "Do you want me to wait with you?"

She didn't know. She really didn't know if she wanted him near her at the moment. But she did not want to be alone either.

He must have noticed that she was not sure about what to answer. He gave her a soft smile to encourage her and it really helped. She sighed softly and together they entered the ladies restroom.

"Just in case that someone enters, you might want to lock yourself into one of the cabins." She told him and he nodded. A few seconds later she could hear how he locked himself into the cabin next to her.

It took her a moment until she found the mental strength to take the test. She knew she had to make it so that she would finally have certitude, but on the other hand she really didn't want to know it for sure. As long as she didn't know it, she could still pretend that she was not pregnant.

After a moment she left her cabin and knocked on the door of his. She really didn't want to be alone right now.

"We have to wait for five minutes now." She told him softly when he opened the door.

"Okay." He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "Do you want to sit down?"

She nodded softly and let him steady her while she let herself sink down to the ground. She leaned back against the wall and looked up to him. "What if someone enters now?"

He shrugged and sat down next to her. "We will simply pretend that you felt sick and that I took care of you."

She gave him a soft smile and leaned her body against him while he slipped his arm around her shoulders. She let her head drop against his and closed her eyes. They remained in silence for a while.

"How long?"

"Three more minutes." She told him after glancing at her watch. She could feel her heart beating up to her throat. The last two minutes had felt like hours.

He nodded softly. "So what are we going to do when the test is positive?" He asked after a moment, trying to meet her gaze.

She shrugged. "Don't know… but don't worry, I won't force you to marry me." She winked, trying to lighten up their mood.

"You really wouldn't have to force me." He told her softly while he brushed his hand over her upper arm. Then he pressed a soft kiss on the top of her head.

She slowly started to relax and closed her eyes again while she snuggled close against his chest. "You know when I should really be pregnant it would have at least one advantage."

Even though her eyes were closed she knew that he had raised his right eyebrow. He always did that. She smiled to herself and reached up for his hand. She entwined her fingers with his and squeezed it softly. "Well, we would never need contraceptives again."

And now she knew that he was having this 'what the fuck?' expression. She chuckled softly. "Well, as long as I am pregnant we don't have to fear that I could get pregnant. And after our baby is born we will not be able to have sex with each other until we're sending our very, very, very smart child to college. And afterwards I will already be going through menopause, we will save a lot of money."

He chuckled. "Yes, but it will cost us a lot of money to send our very, very, very smart child to college."

"Nah, she'll get a scholarship." She turned to face him and grinned. But then the grin faded from her face and she became serious again. "I don't know if I'm ready to be a mother, actually I don't think that I ever could be ready."

He kissed her on her cheek and gave her a soft, encouraging smile. "Don't worry, together we'll make it."

God he is so sweet. She couldn't help but smile. "You're not scared?"

"Like hell." He confessed. "But I'm still very good when it comes to hiding my feelings." He shrugged and ran his hand through her hair. "I think the five minutes are over."

She took a deep breath and told herself to calm down. "Moment of truth." She sighed and reached out for the test. But Grissom stopped her.

She turned to look at him and arched an eyebrow.

"Before we know it for sure, I want you to know that no matter if it's positive or not, I will be there for you, okay?"

She leaned her head against his and kissed him softly. "I love you." She whispered and gave him a soft smile.

Then she turned her attention to the test. The weight dropped off her shoulders "Thank God." She gave a relieved sigh. "It's negative."

He swallowed hard and for a moment she wondered if he had not maybe hoped that the test would be positive. But then he smiled at her and caressed her back with his hand. "Means we'll have to continue spending money for contraceptives." He winked at her and she chuckled softly. She had never loved him as much as she loved him in that moment.

TBC

oh and because Idon't want toget flamed for it in reviews or emails because I did not make it clear enough in the chap, Sara was only joking when she said that she and Grissom wouldn't be able to sleep with each other until their child would leave the house to go to college ;)