Knock, knock, knock...Tommy turned his attentions to the noise coming from the front door. He knew it was Jude, but he never actually thought she would show up at his apartment. Tommy took his feet off of the coffee table and went to the door. He didnt care about his appearance, after all, he felt like he was just hit by a mac truck. Slowly, he swung open the door to reveal Jude in all her glory. Red eyes, tear stained cheeks, heels in one hand and the cd in the other. Tommy noticed the bracelet attached to her wrist and let out a small smile. He stepped aside and allowed her entrance.
Jude walked right over to the couch and took a seat at the end. She walked like she was a permanent resident of the apartment. Tommy shook his head and closed the door before retaking his position on the couch. He took note of Jude's demeanor. Her hand was used to prop up her head while her other hand hung loosely over her folded legs. Her eyes continued to fight to stay open and every once in a while she would wipe away the new tears that started to fall.
"So," Tommy began in a low tone. "What brings you over?" With great reluctance, Jude held her eyelids open and flashed him the note he wrote to her. "Ahh..." Tommy stated. "So I take it you read it?" Jude nodded her head in response. "So what did you think of it?"
"Tell me." Jude stated forcefully.
"Tell you what?" Tommy questioned. He knew damn well where this was going. He was just in a mood so he wanted to screw around with it for a while.
"Tell me what I want to hear." Tommy looked at Jude's redened eyes and simply stated, "I don't love you." Jude stared into Tommy's now cloudy eyes. She could see the hurt that laid beneath them along with the longing he shared for her.
"Liar," Jude stated just above a whisper. "You're such a liar."
"Am I?" Tommy questioned, hurt evident in his tone. He knew he was lieing and he knew Jude would call him out on it. He needed for her to dig into her own personal feelings before admitting anything to her again.
"You're such a coward, Tommy. You won't even admit to me how you feel."
Tommy shook his head in disbelief then began. "Correction Jude, I have admitted to you how I feel. You're the one who ran away, you're the one who laughed in my face like it wasn't a big deal." Tommy stood up from his seat on the couch and started pacing the floor on the opposite side of the table. "Well, it is a big deal Jude. You don't know how horrible I felt when you laughed at me. I felt like you didn't acknowledge how truthful those words were. I felt like you just didn't care about me like I did you."
"I did care, Tommy!" Jude spat back. "It was just easier for me to push you away than it was for me to accept the fact that someone actually cared about me the way you did!" Jude stopped her rant when she realized she was yelling. "Do you want to know the truth?"
"Of course," Tommy said as hope consumed his body.
"The truth is I was afraid that you would eventually tell me that we couldn't be together." Jude paused for a moment to take a look into Tommy's eyes. They grew from angry, to confused, and now to a soft expression. "And I knew that I wouldn't be able to handle that, especially after having feelings for you for so long."