A/N: Alrighty folks, here is the final chapter of this fic. I know I suck for not telling you guys this in the last post and I'm sorry. I thought there was one more before the final one but I guess not. I want to say thank you to those of you who've been reading this since the beginning; it really does mean a lot to me that you guys like this because nobody has ever read my writing before except for those who see it here or on the DLS site. I greatly appreciate all of the comments, I love them all.
Okay, no more sappiness...onto the fanfic. Just a warning, I didn't proofread this like I had hoped. My eyes won't stay open long enough...
As Jude's tearful confession came to a close, she felt something else. Something warm, inviting and loving, and that's when it hit her. The set of lips tackling hers were the ones she's been dieing to taste for almost four years. Tommy's hands held Jude's face in a desperate attempt at keeping her lips in place. His lips sucked on hers, drinking in the warm juices from them.
But like all the good things in life, the kiss soon came to an end. Tommy rested his forehead on Jude's and he opened his eyes. He looked at Jude while she held her eyes shut; he didn't want to kiss her like that. He didn't want the kiss to be sloppy and wet; he wanted it to be slow and full of passion. Tommy didn't get what he wanted but at that moment any kiss with Jude was a good one.
Jude's eyes began to flutter open and her blue orbs immediately became fixated on Tommy's. His eyes still teary and dark while hers were dry and bright. Reluctantly, Tommy lifted his head away from Jude's and he slowly dropped his hands from her face, folding his fingers together before placing his hands on his lap. He tore his gaze away from Jude while resting his back up against the cushin behind him. Jude took the opportunity to lean back on the arm rest of the couch and the two began their staring contest.
Tommy stared at his folded hands and picked apart ever feeling going through his body. The feeling of his heart aching brought the thoughts to his mind. His heart was aching from lonliness and pain. But at the same time it was fluttering with hope; the hope that tonight was going to end just as he had hoped it would.
Jude's eyes bore into the side of Tommy's head almost willing him to look over at her. The thought's circling around in her mind were the same thought's that always over-took her mind: the thought of regret. The regret she felt was all her doing; she regreted laughing at him on her eighteenth birthday; she regreted pushing him away, but she mostly regreted saying no. The one thing that haunted her the most was her saying no to the one and only thing she's wanted all along; the chance to be with Tommy. The ship she wanted to board has long since left the harbor and Jude had been waiting almost four years for it to return. She wanted to board that ship and sail for as long as she could. Jude knew that if she wanted for this to happen, now was the time to say something.
"I'm sorry," Jude stated in a low tone. She knew Tommy understood the meaning to her statement but Jude still felt the need to continue, even though he still avoided her gaze. "I'm sorry for everything I've put you through over the years, for pushing you away when I wanted to be with you. I'm sorry for pretending to not care when that's all I ever did was care about you. I'm just...sorry." Jude stopped and noticed Tommy as he twiddled with his thumbs.
Tommy spun his thumbs around each other for a few moments then he dropped them back onto his lap. He thought about what he was going to say to her. Should I go with my heart or go with the mind? Just like the last time, his mind won.
"I'm sorry too, Jude." He brought his gaze back up to Jude and finished. "I'm sorry that it's too late." The hope that once filled Jude's eyes and heart were now gone, diminished into the nothingness she knew was bound to come. Tears filled her eyes but she refused to let them fall. Jude did her best to hide the hurt she was suddenly consumed with but it was no use; Tommy noticed and that was exactly what he wanted.
"That," Tommy said suddenly, "that, what you're feeling right now, is what I have been feeling for the past four years." Jude knitted her brow with confusion but didn't say a word. Instead, she let Tommy continue. "That pain and heartache that is so gut-wrenching you feel sick, that's how I've felt, Jude. That's exacly how you made me feel when you pushed me away and told me no." Tommy paused for a moment then let his sarcasm take over with the last sentence on the topic. "Feels good doesn't it, Jude. It feels good to know that you can break somebody's heart within seconds."
The tears in Jude's eyes fell down her face freely. She didn't care that she was crying, she had been crying all night and didn't find the need to stop now. Tommy pushed away the pain he felt but he had to get that statement out; he had to make sure Jude knew what the four years of longing actually felt like.
"You see Jude, all I wanted was for you to know what it was like. I wanted you to actually feel the pain and the heartache. I needed for you to feel-"
"I feel it!" Jude yelled. Tommy was taken back a bit at Jude's sudden outburst but knew it was true. Jude did her best to steady her breathing then she continued. "I feel it, okay Tommy? I feel the pain and I hate it; I don't want to feel like that again."
Tommy sat forward and leaned towards Jude, his face only inches away from hers. "So what do you want to do about it?" he asked, eyes peering into hers.
"I want you to fix it," Jude stated in a tone just above a whisper. As she watched Tommy's face move slowly closer to hers, she licked her lips in anticipation for a kiss. Her hot tongue gently hit Tommy's lip involuntarily but Tommy didn't mind.
With their lips only a centimeter away from each other, Tommy replied a simple, "Later." Tommy smiled at the sudden burst of hope his heart now had and went with what he was feeling. There was no decision to be made from what his heart and his mind were telling him. For the first time in a long time they two had reached an agreement: Tommy wasn't going to pass this opportunity up.
Tommy stood up from the couch and headed towards his radio. When he reached it, he skipped over the parts on the cd that he and Jude had already listened to and started it from where they left off. As he made his way back to the couch, the music intervals in betweeen the verse and the chorus had given him enough time to make it back to the couch and ask Jude a simple question.
"Do you trust me?"
"With everything I have." Jude smiled with her answer. Tommy wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her close into a tight embrace. Jude replied by gently placing her arms around his neck.
Cause I'm dreaming of you tonight
Till tomorrow, I'll be holding you tight
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Than here in my room dreaming about you and me
Suddenly, Jude felt herself being pulled forward as Tommy slowly layed down on the couch the duo were currently sitting on. Tommy felt Jude's body tighten slightly and he stopped half way. He brought a hand up to her head and ran his fingers through her hair.
"You have to trust me, Jude," he said pleading. Tommy gave Jude a reassuring kiss on the cheek and he felt her body relax in his arms. He continued to lower him and Jude down on the couch. Tommy rested his head on the arm rest and Jude placed a hand over his heart before resting her chin on the back of her hand. The two locked their gazes upon each other and listened to the music flowing through the speakers, allowing the lyrics to hit home.
I can't stop dreaming of you
Jude let her free arm snake around the the lower section of Tommy's back while his hands rested on the small of her back. She watched as Tommy's eyes grew teary once again, Jude couldn't help but begin to worry. Tommy, sensing Jude's feelings, spoke thoughts.
"I love you Jude, more than I'll ever be able to express, but I can't help but think you'll push me away again."
Jude felt a pang in her heart but knew that it was true; it was going to be hard for Tommy to divulge all of the love he had for her back into someone who pushed him away once. She opened her mouth and the words that followed were the ones Tommy had been waiting four years to hear.
"I love you, Tommy."
Tommy smiled a tearful smile and removed his hands from the small of her back. He rested them on the sides of her waist and hoisted her up closer to his face. He smiled evily at her then said, "Is that so?"
The last verse of the song came on, interrupting Tommy's thought process.
Late at night when all the world is sleeping
I stay up and think of you
And I still can't believe
That you came up to me and said I love you
I love you too
Jude smiled at Tommy then said, "Yes, it is so." She dropped her smile when she noticed the seriousness of Tommy's facial expression.
"Don't leave me, Jude. I won't be able to handle it if you do." He brought one hand up to her face and rubbed her cheek with his thumb, while his eyes were deeply connected with Judes.
"I won't," she stated simply. Tommy smiled relieved that Jude didn't have any intentions on leaving him. His face fell serious once again when he placed two fingers under her chin. He lifted his head off of the arm rest and met Jude half-way. His lips gently pressed up against hers and the spark the duo knew was still there had ignited. The internal flame inside of Jude had been lit again and the feelings coursing through her body were ones she wanted to stay with her forever. The may have been just beginning but she didn't want it to end.
Tommy removed his fingers from beneath Jude's chin and replaced it back on her waist so he could pull her closer to him. His tongue tickled her bottom lip searching for access. Jude parted her lips a fraction and allowed him the access he was searching. The two tongues tangoed together, sucking in the juices the other released.
Jude's grip on Tommy's back tightened as the kiss deepend. Tommy gripped Jude's waist in desperation, trying to get her to realize he didn't want to let go...ever.
After the duo's hands were in place, they concentrated on the kiss once again. It wasn't ravaging, it was a kiss fully of love and passion, one that had been put off for far too long. Tommy's tongue gently massaged Jude's in an attempt to continue the kiss. The two have been fighting the need for oxygen for far too long and soon found that it was time to give in. Tommy peeled his lips away from Jude's and the duo panted for air in unison.
As the pair's breathing came down to a normal speed, Tommy began to run his fingers through Jude's hair once again. She rested her head on his chest in total comofort with the situation. The duo may not have officially stated what they were but to Jude it was clear.
Tommy gingerly stroked Jude's hair with one hand while he made small circles on the small of her back with the other one. He was in love with the woman he was holding and had been for quite some time. He wasn't going to pass this up; he wasn't going to let her leave and walk away from him again.
"What are we going to do, Jude?" Tommy felt Jude stir beneath his hold and he knew he woke her from a light slumber.
"We are going to stay like this, just the way we are right now." Tommy smiled at Judes answer and gave her a kiss on her head through her hair.
A few moments of comfortable silence passed before the last set of lyrics from the song suddenly came into Tommy's mind. The lyrics spoke of the happy ending he wanted with Jude; the ending he now had if the night progressed the way he wanted it too. Like all songs that get stuck in your head, the only way to release the song is to sing it, so that's what he did: he sang the song to Jude.
Now I'm dreaming with you tonight
Till tomorrow and for all of my life
Cause there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Than here in my room dreaming with you endlessly
Tommy glanced down at the sleeping beauty on his chest and smiled to himself. Now him and Jude had the peaceful ending the singer and her beau had; the ending both Jude and Tommy had waited for and wanted for the longest time. It was theirs, they had their happy ending...