When I arrive at school the next morning, I feel like hell. I didn't sleep a wink all night, couldn't stop thinking about Hwoarang and why I had to say what I said to him. Why do I never think before I speak? You'd think I'd have learned my lesson right now, after sixteen years of doing it. Why do I still always manage to say just the wrong thing at just the wrong time? I hate that Hwo's not speaking to me.
Not that he's really had chance to ignore me or anything, because I'm such a coward that I called three times yesterday and ended up hanging up on the first ring. He did ignore me when I called to him yesterday night, though, trying to stop him from walking away. It doesn't feel right that he's mad at me. It's usually vice versa, but I'm never mad at him for long, he always manages to talk me round somehow. That might be why, when I catch a glimpse of him leaning against the wire fence of the tennis courts, staring at the pavement, I run over to him, desperate for the chance to explain myself.
"Hey!" I say brightly. He kind of frowns, then pushes himself away from the fence and starts to walk away from me. Undeterred, I follow him. He speeds up, so I do too, eventually running ahead and walking backwards in front of him.
"Hey, Hwoarang, remember when you got your new bike?" I ask. He tries to sidestep me and make an escape, but I anticipate his action and mirror it, making him sigh in irritation. He still doesn't say anything though.
"You brought it to school and said you'd give me a lift home, remember?" I smile at him. "And I said that if you dared to do anything stupid while I was on the back, I'd eviscerate you with a pencil."
He doesn't smile back, but I know he remembers.
"And you promised you wouldn't, but you did anyway! I had a sore throat for days, I'd screamed so much!"
"What's your point?" he asks icily.
"M-my point?"
"Yeah, Xiaoyu, your point. And hurry up, because I'm busy."
Okay, that didn't work. I sigh, running a hand through my hair.
"Alright, I was an asshole. I'm an insensitive, nasty bitch."
He blinks at me.
"I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot, Hwoarang. I'm sorry. Please talk to me."
I can feel the tears threatening to well up in my eyes as he remains silent, expressionless.
"It's up to you what you do with your life." I say, voice quavering slightly. "It's got nothing to do with me and I'm sorry."
He lowers his eyes, and my bottom lip starts to tremble. I hate when that happens.
"Don't be mad at me." I say, voice barely above a whisper now. "I'm sorry. Please don't be..."
My shoulders are shaking as I try to stop myself from crying, and I hang my head, sniffling rather pathetically. However, this embarassing little performance pays off in the long run, because the next thing I know, I'm being pulled gently into his arms, and he's resting his chin on the top of my head. Hwoarang always has this familiar clean, soapy scent, (he doesn't use cologne because, and I quote, 'it's girly') and I breathe him in, closing my eyes and burying my face in his t-shirt. He doesn't seem to mind that I'm crying all over it.
"...Idiot." he scolds, tightening his arms around me. "What are you crying for?"
"B-because I didn't - " I choke back a sob, " - m-mean what I said, and I'm a sucky friend..." I trail off miserably.
He laughs, pushing me away to look at my blotchy, mascara streaked face.
"I'm over it."
I know he's lying. I saw how angry he was about what I said. But the only thing I can manage to say is;
"B-but...Baek...."
"Hey, if the fuckin' asshole wants to leave, let him."
"But I said - " I try again, wanting to show him in some way how guilty I feel.
"Said what?" he asks, innocently.
"Said that you had a choice..."
"It's already forgotten, Xiao." He slings an arm around me, glancing at me out of the corner of his eye as we pass the vending machine and I sniffle that I still feel bad about it.
He shrugs it off, then grins, noticing my scary face that I'd been doing a good job of hiding behind my hair up until now.
"You look like Alice Cooper."
I wipe my eyes and my hand comes away covered in mascara.
"This is your doing, y'know." I say with a frown, gesturing to him with the streaky hand. "I hope you're proud of yourself."
Hwoarang laughs, and I manage to smile back, mentally doing a merry jig of relief.
Later, sitting in the common room with Miharu, the topic shifts to yesterday's events. I've been hoping she won't bring it up, distracting her by talking about the shoes I want to buy at the weekend, but something must have reminded her.
"So, what did Jin say to you after me and Hwo took off?" she asks curiously, and I lower my head, pretending to be reading the gossip mag that someone left on the table so that she can't see the blush on my face that's threatening to become day-glo.
"Oh, nothing really." I tell her nonchalantly. "I went home."
"Liar." she teases. "There's no way you went home, hon. I called your house and your mum said she hadn't seen you."
Well, damn.
"Okay." I sigh, looking up at her. "I went to the Mishima house."
"With Jin?" she asks a little too loudly.
"Shhh!" I hiss, eyes wide.
"Well?"
"...Kinda sorta."
"Then what?" she says excitedly.
I debate with myself whether to tell her the truth, but I'm saved from decision-making by the bell that signals lesson four. Miharu has to go to Geography revision lessons, something that she's made very clear that she is not pleased with, and she scowls as most people in the room get up and head for the door.
"Dammit! You'd better text me and tell me exactly what happened, Xiao!"
"Okay, fine. But don't tell anyone." I say warningly, and she smirks, probably taking this as an indication of what could have happened.
After she hurries off, I find myself sitting alone, with only the gossip magazine for company. There are a few people dotted around the room, one scribbling inside an exercise book frantically, one laying on the lone comfy chair in the room, arms folded behind his head, and two girls comparing homework in the far corner. I flip through the magazine, pausing to read my horoscope on the back page, then throw it carelessly onto the table, getting up and walking over to the coffee machine. I type in the number for a decaf cappucino, and nothing happens. The lit up words above the keypad catch my eye:
Cold drinks not available.
Hot drinks not available.
I glare at them, as if they will suddenly change if I do it for long enough, and then abandon the machine completely, deciding to go use the one downstairs. As I walk down the corridor, I'm faintly aware of someone approaching, and turn around to face them. I'll give you three guesses who it is.
"Thought if I waited outside the common room I'd find you eventually." he murmurs, stopping in front of me. I feel a shiver run from my toes to my hairline.
"You could have just come in, you know." I tell him. "No need to sneak up on me, Jin."
He makes a dismissive sound.
"No I couldn't. The redhead was in there with you."
"Her name's Miharu." I scowl. "And she doesn't bite."
"Yeah, well, I prefer to get you on your own."
"I'd noticed."
He shrugs off my comment, swiftly changing the subject.
"I saw you with that guy today. What's the deal with you and him anyway?"
"I don't have time to explain it." I sigh tiredly. I really need that cappuccino.
"Make time."
"It's too complicated at this time in a morning."
"It's afternoon" he corrects absently, and I frown, trying to walk away from him to the stairway (the coffee machine's at the bottom) and get away from the conversation, but he places a hand on the wall in front of me, trapping me there.
"Xiaoyu, I want to know." I stare at him, a little spark of curiosity igniting within me. "You looked cosy together this morning." he mutters, and the curiosity changes to surprise. Is it really possible?
"Jin, are you jealous?" I ask slowly. He doesn't answer, averting his eyes from my face, and I tilt my head.
"You are, aren't you?" I say cheekily. "You're jealous of Hwoarang! You're worried that he's - "
Whatever else I'm about to say, I don't get to say it, because Jin moves forward, pulling me into his arms and claiming my lips with his. I feel my body start to tingle, and he pulls away from me before I can react and deepen the kiss. I'm half expecting him to do what he usually does and disappear down the hall, leaving me dazed and frustrated, but he doesn't. I blink, confused by the fact that he's still there, and try to regulate my breathing, hoping I'm not visibly trembling.
"I'm not worried." he says silkily. "Not when I can get that type of reaction out of you by doing something as simple as that."
"I don't know what you're talking about." I say, voice wavering, and run a shaky hand through my hair (I left it down today, God knows why, and it's getting on my last nerve).
He smiles suggestively.
"Makes me wonder what kind of reaction I'd get doing other things."
Somehow, I manage not to let the above affect me, and smile straight back at him.
"I'm not worried either, Jin." I tell him. "Not after that..." I cough delicately "...reaction I got out of you yesterday."
"Don't you have class to be getting to?" he asks smoothly, changing the subject one again, but I can see the amusement in his eyes. I shake my head.
" 'Fraid you're stuck with me for now."