Smashville High School!
Chapter 6: A horrific experience!
Disclaimer: I don't own jack… he died
Reviews: ERFLEWAFFLE!
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Remember the schedule: (and also remember… it's A/B schedule… so they go to half of the classes each day)
1 period Geometry
2 period Biology
3 period English
4 period Gym
5 period World Civ.
6 period Comp. Tech.
7 period AP Commercial Art 2 honors
8 Teacher's Assistant
Yeah…
I was offended by this… please send me your vomit in the mail attached with a note of why the hell you just vomited and then sent it to me
I'm not allowed to like the music I like as that makes me a poser somehow!
Everyone was once again failing to clamor down the hallway towards their first period. Peach had gone away from the crowd to fulfill her T rated desires. Suddenly, as she sat there doing her T rated things, a shady figure came up and crushed her under 258 tons of weight. Then the figure slapped her head off and jumped up and down over and over on her body. Then the figure fell asleep. Then the figure went to go buy some scones. Then the figure left. Peach died.
When everyone went to their first period Geometry class. Peach wasn't there. So as they recited each others names in order to pass the class, Mario noticed and started screaming his head off. His head then fell off. Then he exploded. Mario was still alive and participating in class activities though.
"MARIO! PUT YOUR HEAD BACK ON!" Crazy Hand yelled to Mario. "You might get a yeast infection!"
Mario went to put his head back on, but the yeast infection got to him and he fell over. Mario was still alive and participating in class activities though.
"WTF!" Ness tried to pronounce but failed miserably. Ness is just a failure like that though, so we shouldn't be surprised. We aren't surprised really, when you look at just how many times he's failed so far this story.
"Mario! Put that yeast infection away before you scare the other students!" Crazy Hand yelled at Mario.
So Mario put the yeast infection away, put his head back on, and stopped screaming (which he had been doing this whole time).
"OK! As I was saying! Who sits on the third desk back from the seventh desk belonging to a kid with hemorrhoids!" Crazy Hand said.
Mario started calculating, when he realized that only six kids had hemorrhoids he started to cry. These tears were ancient and powerful tears with the ability to save mankind from the corruption that it faces today. Mario's tear ducts broke and he started flooding the room.
"MARIO! STOP DISRUPTING THE CLASS!" Crazy Hand yelled and ripped off his hand and threw it at Mario. This was all of Crazy Hand's body though, and so Mario was crushed under Crazy Hand's insane weight. Mario was still alive and participating in class activities though.
"ZOMG!" Ness tried to pronounce but failed in a not-so-miserable way.
So then the bell to end first period came and they all left for second period Biology. Mario was on his own away from the crowd when a shady figure came up from behind and crushed him with a weight of 258 tons. Then slapped his head off. Then jumped up and down on the body. Mario was still alive and participating in class activities though.
The shady figure got scared and ran away before he could be identified for who he was.
As Mario waked into class ten seconds late instead of the usual four or five everyone stared at him with shock.
"Guys! Someone tried to kill me! And I think they killed Peach too!" Mario tried to pronounce but failed miserably.
"THAT'S MY LINE!" Ness tried to pronounce but failed miserably.
"Prove it, Mario!" Bowser yelled with a yell that suggested yelling.
"Here's Peach's dead body!" Mario said throwing Peach's body down to show the class.
"That's not enough proof!" Bowser yelled and brought out his team of lawyers. Mario then brought out his lawyers and Ms. Wire Frame was the judge as all the other Smashers were on jury duty.
"I declare this court in session!" Ms. Wire Frame said and slapped her gavel into a random piece of wood. Sadly this wasn't actually wood, and was instead Ness's forehead. Ness tried to scream in pain but failed sexily.
"ZOMG!" Mewtwo pronounced properly.
"ORDER IN THE WHATEVER THIS IS BECAUSE I FORGOT!" Ms. Wire Frame said and slapped Ness with the gavel again.
So in a series of debates Bowser's lawyers showed how Peach's dead body wasn't enough evidence to prove Peach's death. The jury agreed and they then decided that scones were a lovely form of breakfast.
After second period ended and the class had eaten their scones. Everyone went to third period English, getting there five seconds late.
"Hi class! Today we will write poetry!" Sonic said whilst reading all of Shakespeare's poems thirty times each.
"How do you read that fast?" Ness asked.
"I USE SLAVE LABOR!" Sonic said and then showed how he manipulated Tails, Amy, and Shadow into making him read fast.
"OK WHATEVER! LET'S WRITE POETRY!" Sonic said with glee and started dancing.
For the next hour everyone thought about what could possibly rhyme with 'poo' or 'dog' or 'yes' or 'glad' or 'blargenrofl'
"I can't believe it… someone's trying to kill me… and they killed Peach… and who knows when all this death will finally be over!" Mario tried to think but failed miserably and so said it out loud instead.
"YES MARIO! THAT WAS A WONDERFUL POEM! HOW TOUCHING!" Sonic said whilst crying.
"But… that didn't even rhyme!" Ness screamed in anger.
"Now now, Ness, you need to learn something about poetry. The best poetry comes from the fingertips, not the heart." Sonic said.
"ZOMGLIEZORZ!" Ness yelled in anger.
"That'll be a U for you young man!" Sonic yelled.
"Didn't you already give me one!" Ness replied.
"I have no clue!" Sonic yelled.
"Why don't you get a clue then!" Ness replied.
"I have no clue!" Sonic yelled.
So after this interruption everyone tried to write poetry. C. Falcon wrote an amazing poem that was so wonderful and great and amazing and cool. This once again proved how pathetic he is.
The bell rang and everyone started going to their fourth period Gym class. Mario was talking with Luigi. Probably about how Mario had thrown Luigi's face out the window the first day of school. Mario was giggling again. The giggling went into a full time seizure again. And Mario finally died.
"NOOOOOOOO?" Luigi asked in horror.
"Yes" said the shady figure.
"Oh OK!" Luigi said and left with happiness on his ear.
Everyone made it to Gym, but Luigi was ten seconds late.
"GUYS! MARIO'S DEAD! I THINK I SAW THE SHADY FIGURE THAT'S BEEN KILLING PEOPLE!" Luigi said with horror. Bowser brought out his lawyers again with Giga Bowser as the judge and the other Smashers as the jury, but this time Luigi's lawyers were too good and proved Peach's death, Mario's death, and the existence of God.
"WHO DID IT!" Master Hand yelled as he had been spying on the children, mainly Ness, this whole time.
"Was it Ness? After all the murderer has been doing a pretty pathetic job. Was it Bowser? He has been opposing any and all deaths this whole time. Was it Luigi? He had a reason to kill Mario. Was it Popo? We've heard nothing about this guy since the first chapter." Master Hand said in a way.
"HEY! I'm not the only one who's done absolutely nothing since chapter one!" Popo yelled pointing at Gannondorf, Dr. Mario, DK, Falco, Fox, Roy, and Marth.
"Yeah but it's just fun to accuse you of stuff." Master Hand said as everyone nodded in agreement, even Popo.
"I ADMIT TO DOING IT!" DK said as all of you authors that have been paying attention (none) nodded saying that they knew it.
So everyone hung DK for speaking English while he was only an ape. Then they got to the murder trial.
"WHO DID IT!" Master Hand yelled again in a happy way.
After spending the whole time arguing over it they decided that they really didn't care about either Peach or Mario and went home.
YAY!
I know you all hate me… but I honestly like this chapter… and this story…
Oh well…
I'd say some dumb comment right here but I'm sick of everyone… including anyone that agrees with the crap I put down here… and myself…
R&POOP!… Read and Poop Out Orange Popsicles!