Here's chapter 4. The little poem at the beginning is a song called "Come alive" by: Mr.Scruff with added words.
Disclaimer: I own nothing Love Hina ugh!
NOW ENJOY!!
Lost in Winter's flow,
Asleep I froze,
Beneath the snow...
I know that there's rows,
The cold I stand,
Your love's like stone...
Half-awake and knows,
I come alive to you,
To know your love is like gold...
CHAPTER 4
Narrator: Hello there everyone! Narrator here, to bring you the 4th chapter of Love Hina revised! a.k.a. 'A day too soon' I've decided to write up a little commentary and interview with each character throughout this wonderful season of story making...today's selected guest is...NARU NARUSEGAWA!!
Naru: "Hello there Narrator"
Narrator: Hello Naru! Now...first I wanna ask you a few questions as to the real Love Hina manga
Naru: "Sure, go right ahead"
Narrator: Now, why did you choose such an intricate part in the series?
Naru: "Well I felt that it was just the perfect role for such a perfect person like myself" smiles
Narrator: OK, next question...why did you always beat up Keitaro?
Naru: "You know, I never really wanted to, but it was Ken's idea for me to do such a thing!"
Narrator: Ah, of course of course...finally last question from some fan mail...it's from Chris Sutton
Naru: "You see? I have fans!"
Narrator: And Chris says, "Dear Naru, why are you such an ignorant bitch with an ass for a face? I mean, why do you cause so much fucking trouble for people? Why don't you put yourself in Keitaro's place and get your ass kicked a million times a day! Go ahead! Grope Keitaro for all I care...he'll actually like it! And that leads to my next question, why don't you like him doing that sort of thing? I mean, he's a guy and it's not called 'perverted' it's called HORMONAL and it's ALWAYS an accident, can't you just let it go and let bygones be bygones? What are you, an IT? I'm sorry, you don't even cut out to be a man, OR a girl, when I come into the story I'm gonna be so happy kicking your frilly little ass back and forth like a ping-pong game! HAHAHA! I hope you jump off a bridge...BITCH!!!
- Sincerely, Chris Sutton"
Naru: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!! WE'LL SEE WHO KILLS WHO!!!!!!!" starts foaming at the mouth
Narrator: ...OK, then I guess that concludes with the interview, thank you for your time Naru, and on with the show!
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2 days before Christmas, the Hinata residents all gather around the kitchen table to have some breakfast and converse with each other.
Mutsumi: "This food is very delicious!"
Keitaro: "Mutsumi? What are you doing here? I thought you lived at the cafe!"
Naru: "Well maybe she felt like coming today jackass"
Sarah: staring at Charles
Su: "Sarah no want eat? I'll eat for you!" Su gobbles up all of Sarah's share of food
Kitsune: "Oh my...I never get a quiet rest around here"
Charles: "Hey Kitsune...while I was talking to people I noticed that you're the only one here that doesn't go to school or work...what do you do around here and how to you earn your keep?"
Motoko: "She's just here, and I don't know why...I don't even know how she earns money, I mean she has every bottle of alchohol ever made in her room, she spends around $200 American every day on gambling and she still pays rent..."
Kitsune: "For your information I'm a freelance writer!"
Naru: -- "That doesn't pay much you know"
Kitsune: "What? Haven't you ever checked out my books?"
Everyone except Kitsune: "No"
Kitsune: "What?! Unbelievable!"
Shinobu: "I didn't know you wrote books Kitsune-sempai"
Kitsune: "What the hell do you think I write?"
Keitaro: "Poetry?"
Naru: "Porn?"
Shinobu: "Children's books?"
Sarah: "..."
Mutsumi: "Letters?"
Motoko: "I'm gonna have to say porn"
Su: "Cookbooks!!!"
Kitsune: "GODDAMMIT NO! I write actual novels!"
Charles: "Wow, that's pretty impressive Kitsune...but how come I never see any of them around the Inn?"
Kitsune: "Well that's because I'd rather spend my money on gambling!"
Charles: -- "That's not a good thing you know, and shouldn't you have original copies?"
Kitsune: "Oh those? I sell them over e-Bay!"
Naru: "Woah...so THATS how she gets her money!"
Keitaro: "Damn girl! That's so pimped!"
Mutsumi: "I have a great idea everyone! Why don't we all go in to town and buy one of Kitsune's novels?"
Naru: "Sorry, I gotta study"
Su: "I'm working on my new virtual video game so...cant go!"
Kitsune: "Well I got nothing better to do, so why not?"
Charles: "Yeah, sure that'll be cool, yo Keitaro! Wanna come too?"
Keitaro: "Sure man!"
Sarah: "OH! I wanna go too!"
Shinobu: "I'm sorry...I have some cleaning to do..."
Motoko: "I'd love to go"
Mutsumi: "Alright then! Let's..." faints
Charles: OO "HOLY SHIT!"
Keitaro: "Dude, she does that all the time,"
Charles: "NO NOT THAT! I JUST SAVED A BUNCH OF MONEY ON MY CAR INSSURENCE!!!! Huh? What's this about Mutsumi?"
Keitaro: -- "Ah, nevermind"
Everyone finishes their breakfast, cleans themselves and gets ready for another new day. While Mutsumi is knocked out, Keitaro, Motoko, Sarah, Kitsune, and Charles are all going out in to town for a nice walk, and hoping to find and possibly buy one of Kitsune's infamous novels.
Everyone: "See you later!"
The gang decides to set out on a journey in to Tokyo hoping to find Kitsune's novel.
On the road.
Keitaro: "So do you even know where they sell your novel Kitsune?"
Kitsune: "Duhh...I dunno...maybe a...BOOKSTORE?!"
Motoko: "Geez, you can be so stupid sometimes"
Charles: "Well I don't see a damn bookstore anywhere here...hey uh, excuse me?"
Stranger: "Yes?"
Charles: "Do you know where the nearest bookstore is?"
Stranger: "Umm...it should be about 50 miles that way"
Charles: "FIFTY MILES?! Screw that, I'm flying!"
Kitsune: "HEY! WE CANT FLY!"
Keitaro: "Don't worry I can fix that, Charles I wish that we could all..."
Charles: "Don't even think about it! Don't you realize how much energy that would take me? A whole shit-load that's how much!"
Motoko: "Then...what are we gonna do?"
Sarah: "Umm...Charles?"
Charles: "Hm? Yeah?"
Sarah: blushes "Ah...umm...you see...I...umm...th...th...there's...umm..." turns beet red
Charles: "What is it Sarah? Do you know where a bookstore is?"
Sarah: "No but, um...I was wondering...if you.....wanted...to...go to the amusement park with me?"
Charles: "But we're trying to find the book though!"
Motoko: The amusement park! Great idea Sarah! "Say...you know, why don't we just take a nice day off huh?"
Keitaro: "But we haven't even begun doing anything yet"
Motoko: "Shut up donkey penis!"
Keitaro: "You bet it is!"
Kitsune: "Whoo Keitaro! That was smooth as silk! You're turning me on over here!"
Motoko: "JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
Kitsune and Keitaro: "eep!"
Motoko: "OK, I presume Charles has never been to an amusement park correct?"
Charles: "How did you know?"
Motoko: "Just a guess...anyways, why don't we show Charles around Japan and see how we live and have fun?"
Sarah: "Th...that sounds like a great idea!"
Charles: "sigh, fine...but afterwards I really wanna find Kitsune's book!"
Keitaro: "I guess it can't be helped"
Kitsune: "Sure, why not?"
Motoko: "Alright everyone let's go!..........uh, how do we get there?"
Sarah: points straight ahead "We ARE here!"
Everyone but Sarah: "The fuck?"
Inside the amusement park.
Keitaro: "Yo Kitsune! Wanna go grab a bite to eat?"
Kitsune: "Sure! Shinobu never cooks enough anyways!"
Keitaro and Kitsune walk off to the nearest cafe and begin to order food.
Charles: "So uh...I've never been to a park like this before...I...don't even know what the big circle thingy is..."
Sarah: "Oh that? That's a ferris wheel!"
Charles: "Really? It looks like it's moving so slow..."
Sarah: "teehee, that's the point!"
Charles: "Why? I like the looks of that ride over there" points to a ride
Motoko: "Th...that's a roller coaster..."
Charles: "What's wrong Motoko?"
Motoko: "I'm...kinda scared of roller coasters..."
Charles: "OK then why don't we do something else then?"
Sarah: "NO! I wanna do something with you first!"
Motoko: "Hold on...I'm sure Charles would like to see a movie first!"
Sarah: "They don't have a theater here!"
Motoko: "Yes they do! It just came in yesterday!"
Charles: "Ladies please!"
Sarah: starry-eyed "He called me a lady..."
Motoko: "..."
Charles: "Why don't we ALL go see the movie k?"
Motoko and Sarah: "sigh...all right..."
Motoko, Sarah, and Charles all walk over to the movie theater and begin to settle down.
Charles: "Shh! The movie's starting!"
The gang begin to watch in silence as Motoko and Sarah fiddle over each other as they compete on who gets to put their arm around Charles' shoulder. In the meantime Charles seems to be enjoying himself.
Fred: "You fucked my wife"
Barney: "What?"
Fred: "You fucked me wife"
Barney: "When did you get your balls big enough to ask me that?"
Fred: "I'll ask you again...did you or did you not?"
Barney: "That's a sick question, you're a sick fuck, and I'm not that sick enough that I'm gonna answer it...I'm gonna leave! You understand you fuckin' wacko?"
Fred: "FUCK YOU!"
Barney: "Fuckin' screw ball-ya"
Fred: "FUCK YO MOTHA!"
Charles: falls over crying "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THATS THE FUNNIEST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
Meanwhile at the cafe...
Keitaro: "Hey Kitsune...so what kind of novels do you write?"
Kitsune: eating ice cream "Well, you see I write romance novels"
Keitaro: "That's no surprise"
Kitsune: "Yeah, well it's kinda been my dream to become a novel-writer"
Keitaro: "Then...how come you don't go to school then?"
Kitsune: "I dunno...nothing seems to motivate me enough to do something like that"
Keitaro: "Hey...I'm sure that you can do anything Kitsune...if you can write novels and make a guy like me smile, even after all of Naru's beatings, I wouldn't see why a college or university would turn you down!" smiles
Kitsune: "Aww, that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me"
Keitaro: "Really?"
Kitsune: "No, but...still that was very nice of you to say..."
Keitaro: "Hey you know how they say about dreams? I've been trying to find this 'dream girl' all my life but I never seem to find her...I always think it's Naru but she doesn't seem to be that kind of girl to...well...be nice"
Kitsune: "Yeah, I know what you mean...I mean she's turned every guy down at high school...I was beginning to think she was a lesbian"
Keitaro: "Wow! So did I!"
Kitsune: "My God! We have so much in common!" smiles
Back at the theater...
Skeletor: "Take off your furry pants, take off your high heels and put them in your ASS!"
Charles: "OH MY GOD THIS IS THE SHIT!!!! THIS IS THE SHIT MAN, THIS IS SO THE SHIT!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" falls over crying again
Back at the cafe...
Keitaro: "Hey Kitsune?"
Kitsune: "Yes Keitaro?"
Keitaro: "You know...I want to make a new promise"
Kitsune: "What's that?"
Keitaro: "I promise you that...we'll both get in to Tokyo University someday..."
Kitsune: "But that's just too far out of my league though"
Keitaro: "No, no it isn't! Please Kitsune...I think you're such a wonderful girl and I...I've grown to like you so much, and I was thinking that maybe to make life a lot better, we could make ourselves happier by doing things for each other!"
Kitsune: "Oh Keitaro" begins to cry "I promise"
Keitaro: "I promise too..." looks in her eyes
The rest of the gang comes running over to Keitaro and Kitsune with Charles laughing his ass off.
Charles: "Hey man, AHAHA....you should've come with us, HAHAH...it was so fuckin' hilarious! AHAHAHAHA" falls over crying
Motoko: I knew it wasn't such a great idea to go with other people
Sarah: "Yay! Charles is happy today!"
Charles: gets up "Of course I am Sarah dear, I've always been happy"
Sarah: "teehee, I'm glad"
Charles: "Well guys? You wanna head off?"
Keitaro: "But we just got here"
Kitsune: "Maybe Keitaro...we need to find my book remember?"
Keitaro: "Oh yeah! I totally forgot! Well then guys let's go!"
Motoko: That's like the third time anyone has said that today
The gand runs out in to the street in search of Kitsune's book. The people begin to ask strangers of a near bookstore other than the one 50 miles away in walking distance. However to their unfortunate luck, no book was able to be recovered, so they gang decides to rest up at a nearby park.
Motoko: sitting on the bench "This sucks! This sucks my ass!"
Sarah: "At least I get to be with Charles" hugs Charles' arm
Motoko: "Grr..."
Keitaro: "This is so fucking impossible! Why is your book so damn hard to find?"
Kitsune: "I don't know! I didn't know there were no book stores around here"
Charles: "So is this it guys? Are we just gonna give up now?"
Keitaro: "Most likely, it's getting dark pretty fast, and it IS the winter time you know"
Motoko: "This has been a complete waste of my samurai time! I could be at the Inn training my shinny ass off but no! I had to come in search of some stupid book!
Kitsune: "Then why don't you just go the fuck home then?"
Motoko: "You wanna start something you no-good-drunk-ass-retard?"
Kitsune: "I'm always ready you samurai-wanna-bee-with your 'shinny ass'!"
Motoko: "Humph! I have no time for this shit! Maybe I will head on home!" picks up Sarah and puts her on her shoulder "Come on Sarah! If I can't be with Charles alone, then no one can!"
Poor Motoko missed her chance at scoring one for the winning team. However she chose the wrong path and decided to let it settle for another day. Motoko saunters home with Sarah on her back leaving Charles, Keitaro, and Kitsune behind.
Kitsune: "Damn! What the fuck is that girl's problem?"
Keitaro: "She's always like that Kitsune, just leave her alone ok?"
Kitsune: "I just don't understand her sometimes...she doesn't make any sense to me"
Charles: "Well guys? What now?"
Kitsune: "We gotta find my book! We have to! Even if we have to walk for 50 miles, we must!"
Charles: "Why? It's just a waste of time..."
Kitsune: "NO IT ISN'T THIS BOOK MEANS A LOT TO ME MAN!"
Charles: "sigh...fine then...let's go..."
Narrator: That makes it 4 times
The trio begin trekking there way along the dreadful road for 50 long miles...on the way though...
Keitaro: trips "Ugh! Dammit!"
Kitsune: "Are you alright?"
Keitaro: "Yeah, I'm just fine..." gets up "Let's keep walking"
Kitsune: "Alright..."
Everyone keeps a steady pace.
Charles: "You know Keitaro, we've been walking for 2 hours now and we've only traveled 20 miles"
Keitaro: "Yeah, I know...this is pretty tiring Kitsune"
Kitsune: "But we must though..."
Charles: "It's 9pm at night...the sun is already down and it's really dark, are you sure you wanna do this? Aren't you worried about the other residents waiting for us?"
Back at the Hinata Inn...
Naru: "Hey! Where are Kitsune, and Keitaro?"
Motoko: "Who the fuck cares?"
Naru: "Your right!"
Haruka: smoking "Let's get this party started!" cranks up the volume on the stereo
Stereo: "Get out the way! Get out the way bitch, get out the way!"
Everyone at the Hinata Inn are partying their asses off while not caring at all whatsoever about the others.
Shinobu: "Heeeeyyy...burp....this aint wateeeerrrrrr...."
Naru: "Dumbass! That's vodka!"
Shinobu: "Reallllllyyy?....Koooool! " begins stripping
Haruka: "GOOD GOD NO, NOT HERE!!"
Shinobu: "Eeeeverryonnneee geeet readyyy....it's meeee! Crazeeee monkeeeeyyyyyyy " takes off the rest of her clothes
Motoko: "It's official...she's drunk"
Naru: "NO SHIT!"
Back with the trio...
Charles: "Guys...the more we travel, the slower we walk...we've walked only an extra 10 miles in 2 hours now! It's 11pm at night!"
Keitaro: "Yeah...I need some sleep and time to study for tomorrow since I haven't had any time this week to do so..."
Charles: "Actually, you did..."
Kitsune: "No Keitaro you can't go! Not now!"
Suddenly and unexpectedly it begins to snow.
Kitsune: "I thought you promise me?"
Keitaro: "I did promise...that we'd happy together one day..."
Kitsune: "How are we gonna be happy later if we can't even be happy now?"
Keitaro: "Listen to yourself! Do I look happy right now? Do you?"
Kitsune: "..."
Keitaro: "Exactly! Just let me take a cab home and I'll see you then ok?"
Kitsune: "sigh...alright..."
With Keitaro's words, a taxi cab came by and picked Keitaro up and took him home.
Charles: "So...what now huh?"
Kitsune: "I...I don't know..."
Charles: "Really? Are you gonna give up?"
Kitsune: "I might as well you know...it's always been like this for me and..."
Charles: "Your book...it's called 'The art of love' is it not?"
Kitsune: "!!! How did you know?"
Charles: "I read you mind...anyways, I'm guessing you want to give Keitaro this book for a present correct?"
Kitsune: "YES! I DO!"
Charles: "Then let's keep going"
Kitsune slowly nods her head and slowly and tired, she and Charles head through the snow in search of a bookstore that sells her infamous book.
A couple hours later...
Kitsune: freezing cold "Have we made it yet?"
Charles: not affected by weather "Just one more hour to go at this pace and we'll make it...but that'll mean we'll get there at 2am in the morning"
Kitsune: "Doesn't matter..."
Kitsune and Charles continue their treacherous journey to the unkown
Charles: "Kitsune...we've made it...look!" points straight through the fog
Kitsune: clears her eyes "Huh? What? It's...it's..."
A light comes through the fog and beams a shining light on a 24-hour bookstore sign.
Kitsune: "Thank God..." Kitsune collapses and Charles catches her.
Charles knew exactly what to do then and there...he bought the book and flew Kitsune back to Hinata Inn. Morning suddenly breaks through the clouds and Kitsune finds herself back in her room with Charles ever so close to her.
Kitsune: barely awake "...???...How did...that was a weird dream....???...???...Huh?" Kitsune looks over her shoulder "Oh! Charles what are you doing..." Kitsune notices a book under his arm, keeping it close to him. Kitsune picks up the book and read it's title: 'The chronicles of love, By: Kitsune Konno'. This wasn't the book she made but in fact it was all her novels put together in to one long-ass trilogy. "Oh..." Kitsune starts crying "Thank you so much...Charles" kisses Charles on the forehead "Thank you..." With her last breath Kitsune quietly fell back asleep...
In her dreams, she had wrapped her arms around Charles and brought him close to her chest. Charles had barely noticed what she had done, but knew it wasn't meant to be sexual...it was meant to show her happiness.
Charles: Commander...was there another reason why you sent me here...?
END OF CHAPTER
Authors note: Anyone wondering what movies Charles was watching at the theatre are little parodies of movies you could find at (I know this chapter was cheesy but I had to let people know who's attracted to who)