TITLE:
Ten Rules
AUTHOR:
Aunty Pasta
SUMMARY:
Jack sends John the Ten rules of Stargate Missions.
RATING:
K
DISCLAIMERS: None
FEEDBACK:
Enjoyed, respected and encouraged.
BETA
READERS:
DISTRIBUTION:
Anywhere. Just ask first so I know where it is.
AUTHOR'S
NOTES:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Sheppard downloaded his e-mail from the central Atlantis server and looked down the list. One from his high school inviting him to a twenty-year reunion. Sorry, I'm on assignment at the moment. He scrolled down. Something from General Landry Acknowledging his last report actually being in on time. Yes, Sir! You're Welcome SIR! He shook his head and scrolled down further. From: General Jack O'Neil. Subject: Ten rules.
This piqued his interest. Ten rules for what? He opened the e-mail.
"Hey Sheppard," it began.
"I am about to give you the advantage of my years of wisdom in the form of ten things that seem to happen on a regular basis when dealing with missions through the Stargate."
Sheppard shook his head and scrolled down to read the list O'Neil had sent him..
1)
If life gets boring, wait a few minutes, it will liven up.2)
Always expect the unexpected. When nothing happens, you'll enjoy
the surprise
more.
3)
On some mission or another, you or another member of your team WILL
end
up
wearing some funky costume.
4)
Never eat cake while on a mission. Or anything else that is "Only
for you".
Especially
if it a very hot member of the opposite sex offering it to you.
5)
Dead isn't always dead. Even if it is, well, dead.
6)
Don't let the technobabble confuse you. At least LOOK like you
understand.
Even
if you don't.
7)
Don't bring any foreign technology back unless you are SURE of what
it is
supposed
to do. And even then, still be wary.
8)
Don't fall for a member of your team. It will only complicate
things.
9)
Always listen to your gut. It will direct you better that your brains
will.
10)
If you forget everything else, remember this: Out there, WE are the
aliens.
Sheppard shook his head a second with a snort and set about composing his own letter to return to the general.
Jack signed his name to the last of the stack of papers and sighed. 'Finally,' he thought. He turned to his e-mail and scrolled down the list.
He was WAY behind on reading his Atlantis e-mail and it was starting to pile up. He groaned as he scrolled down the list. Deleting everything from the whiny Kavanagh, he opened a couple from Dr. Weir, one was an apology for some whining she had done in a previous e-mail and the second was a report on findings from the city. He scrolled down more and sat up straighter when he saw one from Colonel Sheppard.
Re: Ten Rules
1)
I've already figured this one out.
2)
When the unexpected becomes expected, does that mean the expected is
unexpected?
3)
This has not happened yet although I will keep an eye out.
4)
No cake. Got it. What do I do in the case of a marriage proposal?
5)
I've learned this one the hard way. Would not do it again in a
million years.
6)
McKay talks too fast for me to understand his technobabble.
7)
Have had lessons in this one as well.
8)
Gotcha. But McKay isn't my type and Teyla's seeing Ronan.
9)
I get the feeling you have learnt this one the hard way. Thanks for
the warning.
10)
Don't I know it.
Jack smiled, certain in the knowledge that the Atlantis expedition was going to be fine under the protection of Colonel John Sheppard.